Ok so i love this question. and after watching it so many times, Im actually watching ghost detainee right now as i write this. 

And this latest rewatch, Im struck with the lead up to this big fight in the moments between them I hadn’t noticed before. first, with Ivan, now Henry gets quiet and deals with things, and how there in the windowsill, i think Elizabeth registered just how unable to separate himself from the job henry was. when he asks how did you know you were in too deep. and i think that theme of her having been a CIA agent (and i think, handler) and begins this portrayal with her as having more experience at this than henry does. 

Then when they’re planning to go to geneva and henry goes as arm candy. there’s that moment in the rose garden where henry admits that he had a hard time not getting attached to his asset. and she tells him that’s one of the many things she loves about him. so when they make the decision i think she knows especially how he pulls away and can’t talk about it because he’s going to say something he can’t take back… i think she knows he isn’t… able to separate it. again, she knows he has to but knows he can’t. 

even the way he tries to rejoin dia the day after the dirty bomb - she realizes that his sense of duty has evolved from a deep sense of guilt. 

and then look with Mimi. I noticed it especially this time, after the bomber, and henry walks out into the hallway, if you watch elizabeth’s face as she comes out, it’s a face of understanding how henry is blaming himself. how he takes it to heart. and a face that wants him to understand it’s not his fault. and a face that says she knows he’s too close to the situation yet again. when’s he tells him he’s obsessing and come to bed… 

so while it doesn’t like excuse henry’s reaction. or the way he blames her. and yells at her. and how it has built up into him lying to her, if you listen a few times in that whole fight she’s almost like trying to reason him through basic reasoning of an agent there. “what could you have done?” and “they were following orders. orders that came directly from the president.” and “they would’ve stopped you.” and her arguments come from both a hurt wife, but i also think from someone who understands the intelligence world and toll more than he does. 

idk if that makes any sense. but this rewatch it added a new layer to the whole relationship struggles they had.