human
Can you continue this poem for me?
  "Vhen he found dat a blace was ploonder-fool, he
alvays tell dem, sure:
'Men, sack und pack! I shoots mine eyes for only shoost an uhr.'
Boot if de blace vas fery rich, he vouldt say mit a solemn mien:
'Men - I only shleep for von half uhr more - ve moost
hafe tiscipline.'
"He vas shoost like Koenig Etzel, of whom de shdory dell,
Der Hun who go for de Romans und gife dem shinin hell:
Only dis dat dey say no grass vouldt crow vhere
Etzel's horse had trot.
Und I really peliefe vhere Breitmann go, de hops
shpring oop, bei Gott!"
If once you tie a dog loose, dere ish more soon geds aroundt,
Und vhen dis vas shtartedt on Breitmann id was
rings aroom be-foundt;
Dough vhy he moost hafe somedings vas nod by no means glear,
Nor tid id, like Paulus' confersion, on de snap to all abbear!
Und, in facdt, Balthazar Bumchen saidt he couldtent
nicht blainly see
Vhy a feller for gaddrin' riches shood dus revartedt pe:
Der Breitmann own drei Houser, mit a weinhandle in a stohr,
Dazu ein Lager-Wirthschaft, und sonst was - somedings more.
Dis plasted plackguard none-sense ve couldn't no means shtand
From a narrow-mineted shvine's kopf, of our nople captain grand:
Soosh low, goarse, betty bornirtheit a shentleman deplores;
So ve called him verfluchter Hundsfott, und shmysed
him out of toors.
So ve all dissolfed dat Breitmann shouldt hafe a nomination
To go to de Legisladoor, to make some dings off de nation;
Mit de helb of a Connedigut man, in whom ve hafe great hobes,
Who hat shange his boledics fivdeen dimes, und
derefore knew de robes.
Denn for our Insdructions Comedy de ding vas protocollirt,
By Docktor Emsig Grubler, who in Jena vonce studiret;
Und for Breitmann his insdrugtions de comedy tid say
Dat de All out-going from de Ones vash die first Moral Idee.
Und de segondt crate Moral Idee dat into him ve rings,
Vas dat government for every man moost alfays do efery dings;
Und die next Idee do vitch his mindt esbecially ve gall,
Is to do mitout a Bresident und no government ad all.
Und die fourt' Idee ve vish der Hans vouldt alfays keeb in fiew,
Ish to cooldifate die Peaudifool, likevise de Goot und Drue;
Und de form of dis oopright-hood in proctise to present,
He must get our liddle pills all bassed, mitout id's
gostin' a cent.
Und die fift' Idee - ash learnin' ish de cratest ding on eart',
Und ash Shoopider der Vater to Minerfa gife gebirt'-
Ve peg dat Breitmann oonto oos all pooplic tocuments
Vhich he can grap or shteal vill sendt - franked - mit
his gompliments.
Die sechste crate Moral Idee - since id fery vell ish known
Dat mind is de resooldt of food, ash der Moleschott has shown,
Now ash all dese insdrugdions vere showed to Mishder Twine,
De Yangee boledician, he say dey vere fery fine:
weren't worth a dern.
Boot yet, mit our bermission, if de shentlemans allow-
Here all der Sharmans in de room dake off deir hats und pow-
He vouldt gife our honored gandidate some nodions of his own,
Hafing managed some elegdions mit sookcess, as vell vas known.
Let him plow id all his own vay, he'd pet as sure as born,
Dat our mann vouldt not coom oud of der liddle endt der horn,
Mit his goot proad Sharman shoulders - dis maket
oos laugh, py shink!
So de comedy shtart for Breitmann's - Nota bene - after a trink!
Dere in his crate corved oaken shtuhl der Breitemann sot he:
He lookt shoost like de shiant in de Kinder hishdorie:
Und pefore him, on de tische, was - vhere man alfays foundt it-
Dwelf inches of good lager, mit a Boemisch glass around it.
Vhen in commed liddle Gottlieb und Trina mit a shtock
Of allerbest Markgraefler wein - dazu dwelf glaeser Bock.
Denn Mishder Twine deglare dat he vas happy to denounce
Dat as Coptain Breitmann suited oos egsockdly do an ounce,
He vas ged de nomination, and need nod more eckshblain:
Der Breitmann dink in silence, and denn roar aloudt, CHAMPAGNE!
Denn Mishder Twine, while drinkin' wein, mitwhiles
vent on do say,
Dat long instruckdions in dis age vere nod de dime of tay;
Und de only ding der Breitmann need to pe of any use
Vas shoost to dell to efery man he's soundt oopon der coose.
Und ash dis liddle frase berhops vas nod do oos bekannt,
He dakes de liberdy do make dat ve shall oonder-shtand,
And vouldt dell a liddle shdory vitch dook blace pefore de wars:
Here der Breitmann nod to Trina, und she bass aroundt cigars.
"Id ish a longe dime, now here, in Bennsylfanien's Shtate,
All in der down of Horrisburg dere rosed a vierce depate,
'Tween vamilies mit cooses, und dose vhere none vere foundt-
If cooses might, by common law, go squanderin' aroundt?
"Dose who vere nod pe-gifted mit cooses, und vere poor,
All shvear de law forbid dis crime, py shings und cerdain sure;
But de coose-holders teklare a coose greadt liberdy tid need,
And to pen dem oop vas gruel, und a mosdt oon-Christian teed.
"Und denn anoder barty idself tid soon refeal,
Of arisdograts who kepd no coose, pecause 'twas nod shendeel:
Tey tid not vish de splodderin' keese shouldt on deir
pafemends bass,
So dey shoined de anti-coosers, or de oonder lower glass!"
Here Breitmann led his shdeam out: "Dis shdory goes to show
De drecks ish ad de pottom - de skoom floads high inteed;
Boot das bier ish in de mittle, says an goot old Sharman lied.
"Und shoost apout elegdion-dimes de scoom und drecks, ve see,
Have a pully Wahl-verwandtschaft, or election-sympathie."
"Dis is very vine," says Mishder Twine, "Vot here you indrotuce:
Mit your bermission I'll grack on mit my shdory of de coose.
"A gandertate for sheriff de coose-beholders run
Who shvear de coose de noblest dings vot valk peneat' de sun;
For de cooses safe de Capidol in Rome long dimes ago,
Und Horrisburg need safin' mighty pad, ash all do know.
"Acainsd dis mighdy Coose-man anoder veller rose,
Who keepedt himself ungommon shtill vhen oders came to plows;
Und if any ask how 'twas he shtoodt, his friendts
wouldt vink so loose,
"'He's O.K. oopon de soobject: shoost pet your pile on dat:
On dis bartik'ler quesdion he indends to coot it fat.'
So de veller cot elegded pefore de beople foundt
On vhitch site of der coose it vas he shtick so awful soundt.
"Und efer in America, hencevorwart from dat day,
Ash mit de Native Mericans, de fashion vas to say-
Likes well in de Kansas droples - de shap who tid not refuse
To go mit beoples ash vanted him, vas soundt oopon der coose.
"Dis shdory's all I hafe to dell," says Mishder Hiram Twine;
"Und I advise Herr Breitmann shoost to vight id on dis line."
De volk who of dese boledics would oder shapders read,
Moost waiten for de segondt pardt of dis here Breitmann's Lied.
ID hoppinet in de yar of crace, vhen all dese dings pegan,
Dat Mishder Schmit, de shap who rooned acainsd der Breitmann,
Vas a man who look like Mishder Twine so moosh dat beoples say
Dey pliefe dey moost ge-brudert pe - Gott weiss in vot a vay!
A fery gommon dodge ish mit de arisdocracie;
So dat votefer cardt doorns op, id's game for de familie!
Nun, goot! Howefer dis might pe, 'tvas cerdain on dis hit
Der Twine vas do his tyfelest to euchre Mishder Schmit;
Und Schmit, I criefe to say, exglaimed: "Gaul darn me for a fool,
eternal pool!"
So dey cot some liddle ledders, ash brifate ash could pe,
Vhitch Breitmann writed long agone to friendts in Germany;
Und dey brinted dem in efery vay to make de beoples laugh,
Und comment on dem in de shtyle dat "sports" call "slasher-gaff."
Dere-to - as vash known py shoodshment und glearly ascertained,
Dat Breitmann shtole de gelt himself und rop de oder man.
Boot de ding dat jam de hardest on de men dat bull de vires,
Dey had pud him in a tisdrigt vhere he hadn't half a shanse.
For ash de pold solidaten ish more prafe ash oder mans,
Dey moost lead de hope verloren und pattle in de vans;
Und ash defeat ish honoraple to men in honor shtrict,
Dey honor dem py puttin' em vhere dey're cerdain to be licked.
Boot dis dimes it shlopped over.  'Tvas de dird or secondt heat,
Dat a soldier in dis tisdrigt had been poot oop und beat;
So de Plue Goats dink it over und go quietly to vork:
De bow vhen too moosh aufgespannt vlies packward mit a yerk.
Now Mishder Twine deglaret dat de ding seemed doubtenful,
Boot mitout delay he dook de horns so poldly py de bull,
Und shpread de shdory eferyvhere, dill folk to pliefe pecan,
Dat Mishder Schmit had sold de vight unto der Breitemann!
He fix de liddle tedails - how moosh der Schmit hafe got
For sellin' out his barty to let Breitmann haul de pot;
Und he showed a brifate letter from Breitemann to Schmit,
Vhere he bromise him for Congress if he shoost let oop a bit.
Der Twine vas writet dis ledder; for der Copitain Breitemann
Vould nefer hafe shtood soosh hoompoogks since virst
his life pegan:
He hat tone some rough dings in de war, in de
ploonder-und-morder line,
Boot vas hoockleperry-persimmoned mit dese boledics of Twine.
Howefer, dis ledder vorket foorst-rate - mit de
Mericans pest of all,
Und dey nefer sooposed a Dootchman hafe de sense to do de same.
Dere's nodings in dis vorldt so pad, ash all oov us may learn,
Boot may shange from dark to lighthood, if loock
should dake a doorn;
So it hoppinet mit Breitmann, who in spite of sin and Schmit,
Gontrifed ad shoost dis yooncture do make a glucky hit.
Dey hat sendet out some plackarts to de Deutsche burgers all
(N.B. - Dish ish not mean blackguards, boot de pills
dey shtick on de vall),
To say dat a Massenversammlung - or a meeding of all dem asses-
Vouldt be held in de Arbeiter-Halle, to consisd of de
Sharman classes.
Now dey gife de brinting of de pills to a new gekommene man,
Who dinked dat Demokratisch vas de same ash Repooblican:
Got im Himmel weiss vhere he'd hid himself on dis
free Coloompian shore
Dat he scaped de naturalizationisds, und hand't found out pefore.
Boot to dis Deutsche brinter, de only tifference he
Petween Repooplicanish and Demokratisch tid see,
Vas dat von vash dwo ledders longer; so he dook
shoost vot seem pat
To make de poster handsome - likewise a liddle fat.
How ofden in dis buzzlin' life shmall grubs grows oop to vings!
pusiness shprings!
Van't klein komt men tot't groote, ash de Hollanders hafe said:
Mit dese dwo ledders Breitmann caved in der Schmitsy's head.
Dis tale dat Schmit hafe sell de vight cot so mooch put apout,
Dat many of his beoples vere in fery tupious toubt;
'Pove all, dose who were on de make, and easy change deir lodge,
Und, pein awfool smart demselfs, pelieve in efery dodge.
Vhen de meeding vas gesempled, und dey found no Schmit vas dere,
Dey looket at von anoder mit a ganz erstaunished air;
But dey saw it glear as taylighd, und around a vink dere ran,
Vhen pefore dem rose de shiant form of Copitain Breitemann!
Denn Breitemann vent los at dem: "He could nichts vell exbress
De rapdure dat besqueezed his hearts - de wonnevol hoppiness-
To meed in friendtlich council and glasp de hand of dose,
Who had peen mit most oonreason and unkindly galled his foes.
"Berhaps o'er all dis shmilin' eart' - he vould say it
dere un denn-
Soosh shpecdagles couldt nod pe seen of soosh imbardial men,
So tefoid of base sospicion, so apofe all betty dricks,
"Dat ish to say, a so-galled voe - for he feeled id in his soul
Dat de brinciples vitch mofed dem vere de same oopon de whole;
But he lack a vord to exbress dem in manners opportunes"-
Here a veller in de gallery gry oud, oonkindly, "Shpoons!"
Und dere der Breitmann goppled him: "If shpoons our modifes pe.
Dere's nod a man pefore oos who lossed a shpoon by me:
Far rader had I gife you all a shpoons to eaten mit,
Und I hope to ged a ladle for mein friendt, der Mishder Schmit."
Dis fetch das Haus like doonder - it raise der tyfel's dust,
Und for sefen-lefen minudes dey ooplouded on a bust;
Und de chaps dat dinked of hedgin' saw a ring as round as O;
So dey boked each oder in de rips und said, "I dold you so!"
For dis d'lusion to de ladle vas as glear ash city milk,
Und drawd it on de beoples so vine ash flossen silk,
Dat Hans und Schmit vere rollin' locks, und de locks
vere ready cut;
Only Breitmann hafe de liddle end, und Schmitsy dake de butt!
Denn Breitmann he crack onward: "If any 'lightened man
Vill seeken in his Bibel, he'll find dat a publican
Is a barty ash sells lager; und de ding is fery blain,
Dat a re-publican ish von who sells id 'gain und 'gain.
"Now since dat I sells lager, I gant agreen mit
De demprance brinciples I hear dishtriputet to Schmit;
Boot dis I dells you vairly, und no one to teseife-
If I were Schmit, I'd pliefen shoost vot der Schmit peliefe.
Und also dat he coes to shoorsh - mit a brayer-book -
for salfadion:
I vould not for die welt say dings to hoort his repudation.
"Und noding is more likely dat it all a shlander pe,
So also de rumor dat vhen young he shtoody divinidy:
I myself, ash a publican, moost pe a sinner py fate,
Und in dis sense I denounce mineself ash Republican-didate!
"Ash Deutschers say - und Yankees doo - vhen der
wein ish in der man,
So ish oopon de oder part, de wise-hood in de can,
Vhitch brofes dat wein und wise-hood ish all de same, py shinks!
Und de only real can-didate ish der veller ash coes for trinks:
"Und dat ve may meed in gommon, I deglare here in dis hall-
Und I shvears mineself to holt to it, votefer may pefall-
Dat any man who gifes me his fote - votefer his boledics pe-
Shall alfays pe regartet ash bolidigal friendt py me."
(Dis voonderfol Condescension pring down drementous applause,
Und dose who catch de nodion gife most derriple hooraws:
Eshbecially some Amerigans ash vas shtandin' near de door,
"Dese ish de brinciples I holts, and dose in vitch I run:
Dey ish fixed firm und immutaple ash de course of de 'ternal sun:
I shall only pe too happy to alder dem right afay.
"Und undo my Demogratic friendts I vould fery glearly shtate-
Since dis useless mit oop-gecleared minds to hold a long depate-
Dat dere's no man in de cidy who sells besser liquor ash I,
"Ad finem - in de ende - I moost mendion do you all,
Dat a dootzen parrels of lager bier ish a-gomin' to dis hall:
Dere ish none of mine own barty here, bot we'll do
mitout deir helfs;
Und I kess, on de whole, 'twill pe shoost so goot if ve
trink it all ourselfs."
Soosh drementous up-loudation pefore vas nefer seen,
Ash dey svored dat der Copitain Breitmann vas a
brickpat, und no sardine;
Und dey trinked demselfs besoffen, sayin', "Hobe you
wird sookceed!"-
De nexter theil will pe de ent of dis historisch lied.
DERE'S a liddle fact in hishdory vitch few hafe oondershtand,
Deutschers are, de jure, de owners of dis land,
Und I brides mineslf oonshpeak-barly dat I foorst make be-known,
De primordial cause dat Columbus vas derivet from Cologne.
For ash his name vas Colon, it fisiply does shine,
Dat his Eldern are geboren been in Cologne on der Rhein,
Und Colonia peing a colony, it sehr bemerkbar ist,
Dat Columbus in America was der firster colonist.
Und ash Columbus ish a tove, id ish wort' de drople to mark,
Dat an bidgeon foorst tiscofer land a-vlyin' from de ark;
Und shtill wider - in de peginnin', mitout de leastest toubt,
A tofe vas vly ofer de wassers und pring de vorldt herout.
Ash mein goot oldt teacher der Kreutzer to me tid ofden shbeak,
De mythus of name rebeats itself - vhitch see in his "Symbolik,"
So also de name America, if we a liddle look,
Vas coom from der oldt king Emerich in de Deutsche Heldenbuch.
Und id vas from dat fery Heldenbuch - how voonderful it ron,
Dat I shdole de Song of Hildebrand, or der Vater und der Sohn,
Dese laws of un-endly un-windoong ish so teep and broad and tall,
Und should I write mine dinks all out, I tont peliefe inteed,
Dat I mineslf vould versteh de half of dis here Breitmann's Lied.
Ash der Hegel say of his system - dat only von mans knew,
Vot der tyfel id meant - und he couldn't tell - und der
Jean Paul Richter, too,
Who saidt: "Gott knows I meant somedings vhen
foorst dis buch I writ,
Boot Gott only wise vot das buch means now - for I
hafe fergotten it!"
Und all of dis be-wises so blain ash de face on your nose,
do soospect,
Ish dat oder volk hafe more soopose - und lesser intellect.
Yet oop-righty I confess it - mitout ashkin' vhy or vhence,
Vas dishblayed in dis elegdion py Mishder Hiram Twine.
Vide licet.  Dere vas a fillage whose vote alone vouldt pe
Apout enof to elegdt a man und give a mayority,
So de von who couldt "scoop" dis seddlement vouldt
make a lucky hit,
But dough dey vere Deutschers, von und all, dey all
Now id hoppinet to gome to bass, dat in dis little town,
De Deutsch vas all exshpegdin' dat Mishder Schmit coom down,
His brinciples to foresetzen und his idees to deach-
(Id est, fix oop de brifate pargains) - und telifer a
pooplic shbeech.
Now Twine vas a gyrotwistive cuss ash blainly ish peen shown,
Und vas always an out-findin' votefer might pe known,
Und mit some of his circumswindles he fix de matter so,
Dat he'd pe himself at dis meeding, und see how dings vas go.
Oh shdrangely in dis leben de dings kits vorked apout,
Oh voonderly Fortuna makes doorn us inside out.
Oh sinkular de loock-vheel rolls - dis liddle meeding dere,
Fixt Twine ad perpendiculum: - shoosh suit him to a hair.
Now it hopponet on dis efenin', de Deutschers von und all,
Vere erwaitin' mit oonpatience de onfang of de Ball,
to dake a trink.
Dey hear some hoofs a dramplin' - und dey saw und
dinked dey know'd,
De bretty greature coomin' on his horse entlang de road,
Und ash he ride town invard de likeness vas so blain,
Dey donnered out "Hoora for Schmit!" enof to make it rain.
Der Twine vas shdart like plazes - boot oop shdardet too his vit,
Gaul darn my heels I'll do it - and go the total swine,
Oh soap balls! - what a chance!" said dis dissembulatin' Twine.
Denn'twas "Willkomm! willkomm! Mishder Schmit!"
rings aroom on efery site,
Und "First-rate - how dy do, yourself?" der Hiram Twine replied,
Dey ashk him "Coom und dake a trink" - boot dey
find id mighdy gueer,
Vhen Twine informed em none boot hogs vould
trink dat shtinkin' bier.
Dat lager vas nodings boot boison, und as for Sharman wein,
He dinks it vas erfounden exbressly for Sharman schwein,
Dat he himself was a demperanceler, dat he gloria in de name,
Und adfised dem all for tecence's sake to go und do de same.
Dese bemarks, among de Deutschers, vere apout as vell receife,
Ash cats in a game of den-pins - ash you may of coorse peliefe,
De heats of de recebtion vent down a dootzen degrees,
Und in blace of hurraws was only heardt de roostlin' of de drees.
Und so in solemn stille dey scorched him to de hall,
Vhere he maket de crate oradion vhitch vas so moosh
to blease dem all,
Und dis vay he pegin it: "Pefore I furder go,
I vish dat my obinions, you puddin-het Dutch, shouldt know.
"Und eher I norate furder, I dink it only fair,
Ve shouldt oonderstand each oder, prezackly, chunk and square;
Dere are points on vitch ve tisagree, und I will plank de facts-
I tont go round slanganderin' my friendts pehind deir packs.
"So I beg you dake it easy, if on de raw I touch,
Vhen I say I can't apide de sound of your groonting
shishing Dootch,
Should I in de Legisladure as your slumgullion stand,
I'll have a bill forbidding Dutch, droo all dis 'versal land.
"Should a husband talk it to his frau, to deat' he should pe led,
Und I'm sure dat none vill atvocate id's use in pooplic schools,
Here Mishder Twine, to gadder breat', shoost make a liddle pause,
Und von saidt: "Ish id shleeps I'm treamin' -
Gottstausend! - vhot ish dis?
Twine keptet von eye on de vindow, - boot boldly vent ahet,
"Of your oder shtinkin' hobits no vordt needt here pe set;
Shdop goozlin' bier - shdop shmokin' bipes - shdop rootin'
in de mire,
Und shoost un-Dutchify yourselfs! - dat's all dat I require."
Und denn dere coomed a shindy ash if de shky hat trop:
"Trow him mit ecks, py doonder! - go - shlog him on de kop!
Hei! shoot him mit a powie-knifes! - go for him, ganz and gar!
Shoost tar him mit some fedders! - led's fedder him mit tar!"
Sooch a teufel's row of furie vas nefer oopkicket pefore,-
Some roosh to on-climb de blatform, - some hoory
to festen de toor,-
Von veller vired his refolfer - boot de pullet missed her mark,
Oh vell vas it for Hiram Twine dat nimply he couldt shoomp!
Und vell dat he light on a mist-hauf und nefer feel de boomp!
Und vell for him dat his coot cray horse shtood sottelet
shoost outside!
Und vell dat in an augenblick he vas off on a teufel's ride!
Bang! bang! de sharp pistolen shots vent pipin' py his ear,
Boot he tortled oop de barrick road like any moundain deer,
Dey trowed der Hiram Twine mit shteins - boot dey
only could be-mark
Von climpse of his vhite ober-coat - und a clotterin'
droo de dark.
So dey gesempeled togeder, ein ander to sprechen mit,
Und allow dat soosh a Rede dey nefer exshpegt from Schmit!
Dat he vas a foorst-glass plackguard, und so pig a lump ash ran,
So - nemine contradicente - dey vented for Breitemann.
Und 'twas annerthalb yar dere after before de Schmit vas know,
Vhat maket dis rural fillage go pack oopon him so,
Und he schwored at de Dutch more schlimmer ash
Hiram Twine had done,-
Note bene: he tid it in earnest, while der Hiram's vas
pusiness-fun.
Boot vhen Breitmann heardt de shtory how de fillage
hat been dricked,
He schwore bei Leib und Leben, dat he'd rader hafe peen licked,
Dan be helpet droo sooch slumgoozlin', - und 'twas
petter to pe a schwein,
Dan a schvindlin', honeyfooglin' shnake, like dat lyin'
Und pegot so heavy disgootet mit de boledics of dis land,
Dat his friendts could barely keep him from trowin' oop his hand,
vitch phrase ish all de same,
In de science of pokerology, ash if he got de game.
So Breitmann cot elegdet, py vollowin' de vay,
Ve manage our elegdions oonto dis fery day.
Dis shows de Deutch Dummehrlichkeit - also de Yankee "wit:"-
Das ist das abenteuer how Breitmann lick der Schmit.
"Bjo foeri ek ther,
Brynthings apaldr!
Magni blandinn
Ok magentiri,
Fullr er hann ljoda."
"Beer I bear to thee,
Battle's great apple-tree!
Mingled with might
And with bright glory,
All full of song."
"Dere vas vonce oopon a dimes a Frantchman who asket if a Sharman
GOTTS blitz! blau Feuer, potz bomben Tod!
Vot shimmers in de mitnacht roth?
Like hell-shtrom boorst o'er heafen's plain,
Trowin dead light on eart acain:-
Ja! - wide im nord om Odin shtone
Lies a shiant form im glare alone.
Troonk py de eis-kalt roarin shdream
Der Hans ish hafe ein wunder tream.
Troonk om haunted Odinstein
Vhere blooty Druids omens trew
From grin und screech of shaps dey slew;
Or vhere der Norseman long of yore
Vas carven eagles on de shore,
As o'er him yell de Valkyr broot
Und crows valk round knee teep im ploot,
Vhile rabens schkreem o'er ruddy bay;
Dere - ten pottles troonk - Hans Breitmann lay.
Fast und rof der war-man shnore
Like de hammer-shlog of Thor,
Schnell ash Mjollner's bang und beat
Heaved de form from het to veet
Vhile apofe him in de shkies
Dere he saw a glorie rise,
Und im mittle von it all
De iron lords of crate Valhall.
Long he gaze mit wolfen glare
At de Aesir in de air,
Long mit schneerin baren grin
He toorn his nase auf und hin
(For ne'er a Sherman - tam de otts-
Vas efer yet gife in to Gotts),
Dill avery Aes owned oop dat he
A gott-like man of brass moost pe.
Shtern der Breitmann raise his het,
To his fader Gotts he set:
"Let your worts of wisehood shlip;
Rush your runes, und let 'em rip!
For you de gotts hafe efer pe
Of dose who vere ash gotts to me:-
Alt Thor der Thoren here pelow-
Vot hell you vants, I'd like to know?"
Antworded ash de donner clangs,
Der fader of de iron bangs:
"De gotts will let de hell-dogs go,
Und raise damnation here pelow;
Until de sassy Frenchmen schmell
De rifers ten dat roon troo hell
To telle dis I comme dence,
Dou lord of lion impudence.
"Drafeller! I know dee vell!
Breitmann improturbable!
Vhen on eart I hat my shy,
I schwear py Thor! so crate und gay,
I smashed de Jotuns in my tay,
Und dou shall pe ge-writ sooplime
Ash de crate Thor of deiner time.
"Now ve lets de eagles vly
Skreemin troo de vlamin shky,
Our own specials: - dare nod laugh;
A voondrous poy vot make oos shdare,
For hop vhat may, he's alvays dere!
Vill dell de worlt, troo blut and flame,
Hans Breitmann ist der Uhlan's name.
"Und all dou e'er on eart has done,
From oop gang oontil settin sun,
Vill pe ash nix - I schvear py Thor!
To vat dou'lt do in dieser war;
Plazin roofs und mordered men,
Hell set loose on eart again;
Rush und ride in shtorm und floot,
Cannon roarin, pools of bloot;
Deutschland mad in fool career,
Led py dy Uhlanen speer,
Hell's harfest - sheafs of fictorie,
Reaped mit deat's sword und reapt by dee!
"Ja!  On many a dorf und disch,
Dou shalt pring a requisish;
Dwendy dimes de Frantscher men
Hafe sporned dy land in blut acain-
All dose dwenty dimes in von,
Py Deutschland shall to France pe done,
Und dwenty dimes in blut and wein
Shalst dou refenge de Palatine.
"Go! - mit shpeer und fiery muth!
Go! - mit durst for bier und blut!
Go! - mit lofe for Vaterland,
Into burning fury fanned:
Towns und hen-roosts shall hafe shown
Vhere der Uhlan ist peen gone,
Und cocks vill roon und men crow tame
To hear of der Uhlanen name."
Der fision fadet in de shky,
Und hours vent on und time goed py.
Vot heardest dou, Napolium?
De rumpitty, rumpitty, rumpitty poom!
Ven you hear de sound of de droom,
Oh denn you know dat de Dootch hafe coom,
De treadful roarin Dootch, mit de droom
Und de roompitty, pumpitty, poompity pum!
De wild ferocious Dootch on a bum,
Mit cannon roar und pattle hum,
Mit fee und faw on de foe und fum!
Led py de awful Breitemum!
Bitty boom!! BOOM!!
WHO vas efer hear soosh voonders,
Holy breest or virshin nonn?
As pefelled de Coptain Breitmann,
Vhen he hoont an air-ballon.
Mit lothairingen und Lothair,
Vas nodings to dis Deutscher,
Who vent kitin troo de air.
In eighdeen sefendee,
Der Breitmann vent a prowlin,
By monden light vent he.
In fillages deserted
He hear de Uhu moan;
For you alvays hear der Uhu
Vhere der Uhu-lan ish gone.
Alone allonsed der Uhlan,
Boot nodings could he find
Safe whitey clouds a drivin
In moonshine fore de wind.
Boot ash he see dese cloudins
He bemark dat von vas round,
Und inshtead of goin oopwarts
It kep risin towards de ground.
"Oh, vot ish dis a gomin?
Some planet, py de Lord!
Too boor to life in heafen,
Coom down on eart to poard;
Und pelow it schwing tree engels-
Two he-vons mit a wench.
Boot, mein Gott! vot sort of engels
Can dose pe, dalkin Fraentsch!
"I hafe read in Eckhartshausen
Dat oop in heafen - py tam!
De engels dalk in Sherman,
Und sing Mardin Luther's psalm.
O nein - es sind kein engeln
Vot sail so smoofly on,
Das sind verfluchte Franzosen
In einem luft-ballon!"
Hei! how der Breitman streak it
Ven vonce he kess de trut'!
He spurred id like de wild fire
Of hope in early yout'.
Troo de weingarts like der teufel
Vhen he shase a lawyer's soul;
Down der moundain mit his lanze
Und his wafin banderol.
Down de moundain, o'er de valley,
Troo de village he ish gone;
Dog-barks die out pehind him,
Oders bark ash he come on.
Liddle heedet he deir bellin,
Liddle mind der Hahnen crow;
Liddle hear der Bauern yellin,
Clotter, clodder, on he go.
"Oh, vot ish hoontin foxen,
Und vot ish yager pliss,
Und vot ish shasin bison
On de blains, to soosh ash dis?
I hafe dinked dat roonin rebels
Vas de best of eartly fun;
Boot id isn't half so sholly
Ash to go a luft-ballon."
Und ash id shdill vent onwart,
Shdill onwarts mit der wind,
Der coom a real madness
To catch id, o'er his mind.
Und had'st dou seen him vylin,
Dat wild onfuriate brick,
Dou'st hafe schworn dat Coptain Breitmann
Was pecome balloonatic.
In fain dey trow deir sand-bags,
In fain all dings let fall,
De ballon shdill kep a sinkin,
Und id vouldn't rise at all.
Yet de wild wind trife id onwarts,
Onwarts shdill der Breitmann go,
Dill he cotch id py a rope-ent
Vot vas hangin town pelow.
Boot vhen it risen oopwarts,
Ash he cling to id, of corse,
Mit de lefter hand he holtet
To de pridle of his horse.
Der horse valk on his hind-legs:
Too schwer to rise vas he;
Of de Uhlan cavallrie!
So he go for seferal stunden
Petween himmel und eart pelow,
Boot der teufel und die engels
Couldn't make der Hans let go.
Dill all at vonce an idee
Coom from his loocky shtar-
He led co his horse's pridle
Und glimb oop indo de car.
Und vot you dinks he foundet
Vhen in dat air-ballon?
A nople Englisch vicomte,
Und mit him vas a laity,
Mit whom he'd rooned afay,
Whom he indroduce to Breitmann
Und der dritte was a barson,
Whom Milord, mit prudent view,
Hat took als secretaire,
Likevise for pallast doo.
Vhen de gas was out, dey say;
Boot de dame vould not 'low it:-
She'd an arriere pensee.
Sait Milord: "Afar we've wandered,
We are completely brown;
And I'll give a thousand shiners
If you'll take me to a town
Where no one will molest us
Till we find our way to Lon--"
Here der Breitmann ent de sentence
Ash he gry out, shortly, "done."
"And as for this fair lady
To whom I would be bound,"
Sait Milord, "we'll have a wedding
Before we reach the ground.
To escape her father's anger
We fled to live in peace,
But she's relatives in London,
And they have - the police."
O vas not dis a voonders
To make de Captain shdare?-
A tausend pounds in bocket
Und a veddin in de air?
He gafe avay de laity,
Und als sie wieder kam
Zur festen Erde wieder,
"O go mit me," said Breitmann,
"O go in mein Quartier!
Don't mind dem gommon soldiers,
For I'm an officier."
He guide dem troo de coontry
Till dey reach de ocean strand;
Now dey sit und pless Hans Breitmann,
In de far-off English land.
Dis ish Breitmann's last adfenture
How troo Himmel air flew he:
Und it's dime, oh nople reader!
For a dime to part from dee.
Dou may'st dake it all in earnest
Or pelieve id's only fon;
Boot dere's woonder dings has hoppent
Fery oft in Luft-ballon.
"Tres estime ami, - Ick seyn nock nit verdorb,
Vielleickt Sie denck wohl kar, das ick sey tod gestorb,
Ock ne Kott loben Danck, ick leb nock kanss wohl auf.
Naturlich wie Kespenst die off die Kasse keh."
Vot roombles down de Bergstrass?
Vot a grash ish in de air!
Mit a desberate gonfusion,
Und a gry of wild tespair,
Das sind gethrasht Franzosen,
Und dose who after flee
Are de terror of Champagner,
Die Uhlan cavallrie.
So liddle say die hoonted,
De hoonters lesser shdill;
Der Frank is ride for's leben,
Der Deutscher rides to kill.
Deir eyes like wild-katzs glare;
De blut und iron ridin
Of furie und despair.
Boot of all de wild Uhlanen,
Der Breitmann ride de pest;
For he mark de Frantsch gommanter
Ish most elegandtly tresst.
Und ash he coom down on him,
Dere's a deat' look in his eye:
"Gotts! if I carfe dat toorkey,
How I'll make de stoofin vly!"
Mit a clotter und a flotter
Like a hell-sturm dey are on:
Mit a rottle to de pattle
Coom de Deutschers, knockin' down,
Down de moundain to a brucke-
Vhy die Frantschmen toorn ad bay?
Oder Deutsch were dere pefore dem,
Und die pridge ish coot avay!
Von second der Franzose
Look down mit blitzen eye;
Von second at de brucke,
Den toorn him round to die.
Vhile mit out-ge-poke-te lanze,
Like ter teufel shot from hell,
Rode der ploonder-shtarvin Breitmann
On der grau-bart Colonel.
Ish shdop in his career?
Vot for he pool his pridle?
Vot for let down his speer?
Vot for his eyes like saucers
Grow pigger, rimmed mit staub?
Vot for his hair, a pristlin,
Lift oop his pickel-haub?
So awfool - so oneart'ly,
So treadful was his glare,
So unbeschreiblich gastly,
Dat der Colonel self was shkare.
Oop come der Breitmann ridin,
Und mit gratin force he said:
"Bist - du - wirkelich - lebendig?
Can de grafe gife oop its tead?
"Dou livest yet - dou breaf'st yet,
Dough oldter now you pe
Since I mordered you in Strasburg,
Mein freund - mon Jean Bouilli.
We lofed de selfe maiden
Wohl forty years agone:-
She died to hear I kilt you:-
Jean - how weiss your beard ish grown!
"I would gife my Hab' und Guter,
Dereto mein bit of life
Couldt I pring dat shild to leben,
Und make her, Jean, dy wife!"
Here der Breitmann boorst out gryin,
Like a liddle prook vept he;
Und dey hugged and gissed einander,
"Ach, de efils dat from efil
Troo a life ish efer grow!
Had I nefer dink I killed you,
Many a man were livin now-
Many a man dat shleeps in cane-brakes,
Many a man py pillow-shore;
For dy morder mate me reckelos,
Und von tead man gries for more!
"O Madchen! schon im Himmel!
(Warst schon on eart' difine)-
Can'st dink among de Engeln
Of soosh as me und mine?
Den look on soosh a Reue,
Ash eart' has nefer known:-
Whereto hast dou a sabre?
Wherefore not kill me, Jean?"
"O, ne pleurez pas, mon Breitmann!
Je trouve cela trop fort,"
Gry der Colonel sehr politely;
"How! - you crois dat I was mort!
Mon Dieu!  'Tis but one minute,
As we galloped to this plain,
I thought your spear, mon gaillard,
Would kill me o'er again.
Je vous fais mon compliment,
Your tendresse becomes you well;
Et ne pleurez pas, mon brave,
Pour la petite demoiselle.
I have had a thousand since;
One can always find such game;
Et pour dire la verite,
I have quite forgot her name."
Der Breitmann lok so earnest,
Long and earnest at his foe,
Ash if seein troo his augen
To de forty years ago.
Mit vot a shmile der Breitmann
Toorned roundt und rode away:
Dat was all his parting greetin
O HEAR a wondrous shdory
Vot soundet like romance,
How Breitmann mit four Uhlans
Vas dake de town of Nantz.
De Frantschmen call it Nancy,
Und dey say its fery hard
Dat Nancy mit her soldiers
Vas getook py gorpral's guard.
Dey dink id vas King Wilhelm
Ash Hans ride in de down,
Und like Odin in his glorie
Gazed derriply aroun'.
Denn mit awfool condesenchen
He at de Frantschmen shtare,
Und say, "Ye wretsched shildren?
Abbortez mir vodre mere!"
Hans mean de city Syndic,
Whom maire de Frantschmen call;
So mit a tousand soldiers
Dey 'scort him to de Hall;
In de shair of shtade dey sot him,
Der maire coom to pe heard,
Und Hans glare at him fife minutes
Pefore he shbeak a word.
Den in iron dones he ootered:
"Ich temand que rentez fous:
Shai dreisig mille soldaten
Bas loin l'ici, barploo!
Aber tonnez-moi Champagner;
Shai an soif exdrortinaire-
Apout one douzaine cart-loads;
Und dann je fous laisse faire."
His segretaire - "Read
A liddle exdra liste
Of dings de army need,
Und dell dem in Franzosisch
Dey moost shell de neetfool down
In less dan dwendy minudes,
Or, py Gott, I'll purn de town."
"Item - one tousand vatches
Of purest gold so fair;
Dazu funf tousand silbern,
For de gommon soldiers' wear;
Und tree dousand diamant ringe
Dey moost make tirectly come,
We need dem for our schweethearts
Ven we write to em at home!
"Von million cigarren
Ve'll accept ash extra boons
For not squeezin dem seferely,
Dazu dwelf tousand shboons."
Here der maire fell down in schwoonin,
Denn all dat he could say
Vas ,"O mon dieu, de dieu, dieu!
Nous voila ruinees!"
No wort der Breitmann ootered,
He only make a sgratch,
Calm and silend on de daple,
Mit a liddle friction match.
De maire versteh de motion,
So went him to de task
Of raisin mong de peoples
Vot it vas der Breitmann ask.
So kam he mit de ringe,
Dey vind dem pooty soon;
So kam he mit de vatches,
Und avery silber spoon.
Boot ash for de champagner,
He wept and loudly call
Dat par dieu! he hadn't any,
For de Deutsch hafe troonk it all.
Ja! - de gorporal's guart have trinket
Efery pottle in de down,
Vhile dese negotiations
Oop-stairs vere written down.
Boot der Breitmann sooplimely,
Like von who nodings felt,
Said, "Instet of le champagner
Nous brentirons du gelt."
Ja wohl! Donnes cent mille franken,
C'est mir egal, you know;
Pid dem pring id in a horry,
For 'tis dime for oos to go."
Der maire he pring de money,
Und der Breitmann squeeze his hand,-
"Leb wohl, dou nople brickbat,
"Boot it griefes my soul to larmen,
Und I sympathize mit dein,
To pense of you, mon ami,
Sans le champagner wein.
Dere will oder Deutsch pe gomin,
Und it preak mine heart to dink
De vay dey'll bang and slang you
If dere's no champagne to trink!
"Cela fous fera misere
Que she ne feux bas see;
So, vollow mes gonseilles,
Et brenez mon afis.
Shai, moi, deux mille boutelles,
De meilleur dat man can ashk,
Vich I will gladly sell-
Sheap as dirt - ten franks a flask."
De maire look oop to heafen,
Wohl nodings could he say,
Vhile oud indo de mitnight
Der Breitmann rode afay.
Away - atown de falley,
Till noding more abbears
Boot de glitter of de moonlight,
De moonlight on deir spears.
HE sits in bivouacke,
By fire, peneat' de drees;
A pottle of champagner
Held shently on his knees;
His lange Uhlan lanze
Stuck py him in de sand;
Vhile a goot peas-poodin' sausage
Adorn his oder hand.
Und jungere Uhlanen
Sit round mit oben mout'
To hear der Breitmann's shdories
Of fitin in de Sout'
Und he gife dem moral lessons,
How pefore de battle pops:
"Take a liddle brayer to Himmel,
Und a goot long trink of schnapps."
Denn his leutenant bemarket:
"How voonder shdrange it peen
Dat so very many wild pigs
Ish dis year in de Ardennes.
Ash I sout dere - donner'r'wetter!-
I sah dem coom heraus,
Shoost here und dere an Eber
Mit a hoondert tousand sows.
"Shoost dink of all dese she-picks
Vot flet to neutral land!"
Said Breitmann: "Fery easy
Ish dis to oonderstand:
Dese schwein-picks mit de sauen
Vot you saw a-roonin rond,
Ish a crate medempsygosis
Of the Frantsche demi-monde.
"I hafe readet in de Bible
How soosh a coterie
Vas ge-toornet into swine-picks,
Und roon down indo de see;
Boot since de see aint handy,
Or de picks vere all too dumm,
Dey hafe coot across de porder
Now ash dey boorst oud laughin,
Und got more liquor out,
Dey hearden from de sendry
A shot und denn a shout.
Und Breitmann crasp his sabre
Quick ash de bullet hiss,
Und leapin out, demantet,
"Herr'r'r'r Gott! vat row ish dis?"
Und bold der Schwabian answert:
"Dis minute on de ground
Dere comed a Frantschman greepin,
On all-fours a-prowlin round.
I ask him vat he vanted;
Werda! I gry; boot he
Say nodings to my shallenge,
Und only answer 'Oui.'
"So I shoot him like der teufels,
Und I rader dink our friend,
Dis sneakin Frank-tiroir,
Ish a-drawin to his end."
So dey hoonted in de pushes,
Und in avery gorner dig,
Boot, mein Gott! how dey vas laughin,
Ven dey found a - mordered pig.
Next week dey hear from Paris,
Und reat in de Gaulois
Of de most adrocious action
De vorlt vas efer saw.
How de Uhlan cannibalen,
Dis vile und awful prood,
Hafe killt a nople Frantschman,
Und cut him oop for food.
"Ja - shop him indo sausage,
Und coot him indo ham;
Und schwear dey'll serfe all oders
Exacdly so - py tam!
Sons of France, awake to glory,
Let your anciend valor shine!
Und shweep dis Prussian vermin
Het und dails indo de Rhine!"
Yane vas tantz mit Herr Breitmann.
Olim Studiosus Theologiae, now Uhlan free-lancer,
VOT gollops at mitnight,
Mit h'roolah and yell,
Like der teufel's wild yager
Boorst loose out of hell?
Vot cleams in the sonrise
Bright vlashin in gold?
Das sind die Uhlancers
Of Breitmann der bold.
Dey frighten de coontry,
Dey ploonder de town;
And when dey are oop
Die Franzosen co down:
For pefore de wild Norsemen
De Southron must flee;
How dey sweep de chateaux!
How dey grab oop de hens!
Und gobble de toorkeys
Shoot oop in de pens
Dey are ragin abroad:
You may track dem py fedders
Knee-deep in de road.
Are ploonderin gone.
De demon of fengeance
His wings o'er em vave,
Mit deir fingers like hooks,
Und mit maws like de grafe.
Dey coom to a castel,
So shplendid, of bricks;
Franzosen defend it,
Das help em gar nichts.
For de Uhlans hafe take it,
Dey smash in de gate,
Und inshpired by Gott's fury,
Dey shdole all de plate.
From shamber to shamber
Dey fighted deir way,
Till dead in de hall
De Franzosen all lay;
Und dere shtood a madchen,
So lieblich und hold,
Who laugh at de dead
Troo her ringlocks of gold.
Denn der Breitmann, all plooty,
To'm madel so lind,
Spoke courtly und tender:
"Vy laughst dou, mein kind?"
Denn de plue-eyed young peaudy,
Mit lippe so red,
Said, "Vy not shall I laughen?
Vhen Frenchmen are dead.
"I coom here from Deutschland,
De shildren to teach;
Dey mock me for Deutsch,
Und dey sneer at mein sbeech;
Und since de war komm,
I vas nearly gone mad,
You wouldn't peliefe
How dey dreet me so pad."
Mit a tear Breitmann bend
To de peaudifool miss;
"Crate Gott! can'st dou suffer
Soosh horrors ash dis?"
His arm round de maiden
Der hero has bound,
Und it shtaid dere goot vhile,
Fore dey got it unwound.
"Ho! fetch me de diamonds!
Ho! shell out de rings!
Mit all in de castle
Of dat sort of dings."
Twas brought to de Captain-
A donderin load:
At de veet of de madchen
Dat ploonder he trowed.
"Ho! pring oos champagner!
Und light oop de hall!
Dis night der Herr Breitmann
Will gife you a ball.
Dat pile of dead vellers,
Vot died for La France,
May see, if dey like,
How de Shermans can tance."
Dey find laties' garments,
Und - troot to confess-
Likewise som Frantsch maidens,
Who help dem to tress.
De rest of de Uhlans
Who hadn't soosh loves,
Fixed oop in black clothes
Mit white chokers und gloves.
Now hei! for de fittles!
Und hei! for clavier!
For de tantz of de Uhlans-
De men of de speer!
How de shendlemen ashk
If dey'd blease introduce;
How de ladies mit beards
Were called Espionnes Prusses!
Hei, ho! how dey tanzet!
Hei, ho! how dey sang!
How mit klingen of glasses
De braun arches rang.
How dey trill from deir hearts
Ash dey pour out der wein,
De songs of de Oberland,-
Und madder und wilder,
All whirlin around,
Vent Hans mit de maiden
In Bacchanal bound.
She helt to his peard,
Und dey gissed as if mad;
I tont dink dat efer
Vas dimes like dey had.
Boot calm in de hall,
Ever calm on de floor,
Was a row of still guests
Dat wouldn't tantz nefermore.
Mit plood shtreams black winding,
Der lord mit his men,
When der Youngest Day cooms
Hans may meet dem acain.
So rash und so wild!
Der teufel's own child!-
Dis ish "Breitmann's Last Barty,"
Dey'll sing it for years;
De lords of de lanzes,
De sons of de speers.
For dey frighten de coontry,
Dey ploonder de town;
Und when dey are oop
De Franzosen go down;
For pefore de wild Norsemen
Weak Southrons moost flee,
"Et affectu pectoris,
Et toto gestu corporis,
Et scholares maxime,
Qui festa colunt optime."
- Carmina Burana, 13th century.
DER teufel's los in Bal Mabille,
Dere's hell-fire in de air,
De fiddlers can't blay noding else
Vot makes de beoples howl mit shoy?
Da capo - Bravo! - bis!!
It's a Deutscher aus Amerika:
Dere's silber toughts vot might hafe peen,
Dere's golden deeds vot must:
Der Hans ish come to Frankenland
On one eternal bust.
Der same old rowdy Argonaut
Vot hoont de same oldt vleece,
A hafin all de foon dere ish-
Mit a gal on eider shoulder
A holdin py his beard,
He tantz de Cancan, sacrament!
Dill all das Volk vas skeered.
Like a roarin hippopatamos,
Mit a kangarunic shoomp,
Dey feared he'd smash de Catacombs,
Each dime der Breitmann bump.
De pretty liddle cocodettes
Lofe efery dings ish new,
"D'ou vient il donc ce grand M'sieu?
O sacre nom de Dieu!"
In fain dey kicks deir veet on high,
And sky like vlyin geese,
Dey can not kick de hat afay
O vhere vas id der Breitmann life?
Oopon de Rond Point gay,
Vot shdreet lie shoost pehind his house?
Aroundt de corner Harper's shtands
Vhere Yankee drinks dey mill,
Vhile shdraight ahet, agross de shdreet,
Der lies de Bal Mabille.
Id's all along de Elysees,
Id's oop de Boulevarce,
He's sampled all de weinshops,
Und he's vinked at efery garce.
Dou schveet plack-silken Gabrielle,
O let me learn from dee,
If 'tis in lofe - or absinthe drunks,
Dat dis wild ghost may pe?
Und dou may'st kneel in Notre Dame,
Und veep away dy sin,
Vhile I go vight at Barriere balls,
Oontil mine poots cave in;
Boot if ve pray, or if ve sin-
Vhile nodings ish refuse,
Tis all de same in Paris here,
So long ash l'on s'amuse.
O life, mein dear, at pest or vorst,
Ish boot a vancy ball,
Its cratest shoy a vild gallop,
Vhere madness goferns all.
Und should dey toorn ids gas-light off,
Und nefer leafe a shbark,
Sdill I'd find my vay to Heafen - or-
Dy lips, lofe, in de dark.
O crown your het mit roses, lofe!
O keep a liddel sprung!
Oonendless wisdom ish but dis:
To go it vhile you're yung!
Und Age vas nefer coom to him,
To him Spring plooms afresh,
Who finds a livin' spirit in
DER Breitmann sits in la Sorbonne,
A note-pook in his hand,
'Tvas dere he vent to lectures,
Und in oldt Louis le Grand.
Id's more ash two und dwendy years
Since here I used mein pen;
Oh, where ish all de characders,
Dat I hafe known since denn?
Der cratest boet efer vas,
Der pest I efer known,
Vent lecdures here, too, shoost like me,
He raise de teufel all arount,
He hear de Sorbonne chime;
Crate shpirid ender in mein heart,
Und mofe mein soul to rhyme.
Dictes moy - in what shpirit land
Who blazed on soosh a train?
Shveet Echo flings de quesdion pack,
O'er lake or shdreamlet lone;
All eartly peauty fades afay,
Vhere ish dem lofed ones gone?
Oh, vhere ish Lola Montez now,
So loved in efery land?
How oft I shmoked dose cigarettes
She rollt mit vairy hand!
Dat mighdy soul, dat shplendit brick,
A saint's pecome to be,
For mit soosh saints der Breitmann make
Und vhere ish La Pochardinette?
Ish she too mit de dead?
She loafed de Latin Quarter mit
A hat und fedder on her het.
Lebe wohl petite Pochardinette!
Qui ne safait refuser,
Ni la ponche a la bleine ferre,
Ni sa pouche a un paiser.
O Prince! dese quesdions all are nix,
I sit here all alone,
Mit von refrain to end de shdrain,
Vhere ish mein lofed vons gone?
Vhen Marcovitch has cut und run,
Und Schneider's off de ving,
Some cray old reprobate like me
Vill of dese lofed vons sing.
DERE woned once a studente,
Whom jeder der ihn kennte,
Der rowdy Breitmann hiess.
He roosted in de rue La Harpe,
'Twas shoost in anno '48,
Dat all dese dings pefel.
Boot he who vouldt go hoontin now
To find dat rue La Harpe,
Moost hafe oongommon shpecdagles,
Und look darnation sharp.
Mit hauses made so vree,
Dere roon shoost now a Bouleverse
Vhere dis shdreet used to pe.
A vild oldt shdory say,
A shtudent vonce pring home a dame,
Und on de nexter day,
He pooled a ribbon from her neck-
Off fell de lady's het;
She'd trafelled from de guillotine,
Und valked de city - deadt.
Boot Breitmann nefer cared himself
If dis vas falsch or drue,
I kess he hat mit lifin gals
Pout quite enough to do.
Und Februar vas gomin,
Ganz revolutionnaire,
Und vhere der Teufel had vork on hand,
Der Hans vas alvays dere.
Und darker grew de beople's brows,
No Banquet could dey raise,
So dey shtood und shvore at gorners,
Or dey singed de Marseillaise.
Und here und dere a crashin sound
Like forcin shutters ran,
Und boorstin gun-schmidts' vindows in
Hard vorked der Breitemann.
He helped to howl Les Girondins,
To cheer de beople's hearts;
He maket dem bild parricades
Mit garriages und garts.
Vhen a bretty maiden sendinel
Vonce ask de countersign,
He gafe das kind a rousin giss,
Gott hute dir und dein!
Und wilder vent de pattle,
France spread her oriflamme,
Und deeper roared de sturm bell,
De bell of Notre Dame;
Und he who nefer heard it,
O'er shots und cries of fear,
Loud booming like a dragon's roar,
Has someding yet to hear.
Dere comed a fusillade,
Und dyin groans und fallin dead
Vere roundt dat parricade,
But der song of Revolution
From a tousand voices round,
Made a fearful opera gorus
To de deat' gries on de ground.
Und all around dose parricades
Dey raise der teufel dere;
Somedimes dey vork mit pig-axes,
Und somedimes mit gewehr.
Dey maket prifate houses
Gife all deir arms afay,
Und denn oopon de panels
Dey writet Armes donnees.
Und ve saw mid roarin vollies,
Shtreaked like banded settin suns,
Two regiments coome ofer,
Und telifer oop deir guns.
Hei! - how de deers vere roonin:
Hei! - how dey gryed hurrahs!
For dey saw de vight vas ofer,
Und dey know dey gained deir cause.
Dus spoke deir hearts outboorstin,
In battle by de blade,
From sun to sun mit roarin gun
Und donnerin parricade.
In vain pefore de depudies
De princes tremblin stood,
Vot comes in France too late a day
Cooms shoost in dime for blood.
Vhen de Tuileries vas daken,
Amid de scotterin shot,
Und vlyin stones, und howlin,
Und curses vild und hot,
'Tvas dere Hans clobbed his musket,
Und dere de man vas first
To roosh into de palace,
Ven de toors vere in-geburst.
Some vellers burn de guart-haus,
Some trink des Konigs wein;
Some fill deir hats mit rasbry sham,
Und prandy beeches fein.
Hans Breitmann in de gitchen
Vas shdare like avery ding,
To see vot lots of victual-de-dees
Id dakes to feed a king.
Und oder volk, like plackguarts,
Vent dook de goaches out;
Und burnin dem, dey rolled dem
Afay mit yell und shout.
Der Breitmann in der barlor,
Help writen rapidly,
La liberte pour la Pologne!
Likevise - pour l'Italie!
Den in der Tuileries courtyard
Ten tousand volk come on;
Dey vas gissin und hurrahin
For to dink der king vas gone.
Some vas hollerin und tantzin
Round de blazin oldt caboose;
Vhen Frantschmen kits a goin,
Den dey lets der teufel loose.
Boot von veller set me laughin,
Who roosh madly roun de field;
Und gestohlen speer und schild.
Mit a sblendit royal charger,
Vitch he hat somevhere found,
Like a trunken Don Quixote,
He vent tearin oop und round.
Doun vent de line of Bourbons,
Doun vent de vork of years,
Ash de pillars of deir temple
Ge-crashed like splintered speers;
Und o'er dem rosed a phantom,
Wild, beautiful, und weak,
Vhile millions gry arount her-
Vive! vive la Republique;
Tree days mid shdiflin powder shmoke,
Tree days mid cheers und groans,
Ve fought to guard de parricades,
Or pile dem oop mit shtones.
De hand vitch held de bistol denn,
Or made de crowbar bite,
Das war de same Hans Breitmann's hand
Vitch now dese verses write.
"Vlaenderen, dag en nacht
Waer ik ook ben en vaer,
Gy zyt my altyd naer.
Vlaenderen, dag en nacht
Overal vrolykheid,
Overal lust.
Maegden van fier gelaet,
Knapen zoo vroom en draet.
Overal vrolykheid,
Overal lust."
VHEN sommer drees shake fort deir leafs,
Ash maids shake out deir locks,
Und singen mit de rifulets,
Vitch ripplen round de rocks,
Und beople swarm land-outwards,
Und cities weary men,
Hans Breitmann rode de Belgier mark
He found it fein und fair,
For dey pour him out de peke schnapps,
Dazu elixer rare;
Und mit a soldier's inshdink
To find a shanse to shoot,
Mitout delay he fire afay
De virst shot dat der Breitmann fired
He pring de peaches down,
For he hit de double zero mit
A gold Napoleon.
Und ash he raked de shiners in,
He hummed a liddle doon:
"I kess I tont try dat again,"
Said he, dis afdernoon.
Boot vhen he coom to rouge et noir,
A tear fell tripplin denn,
Id look so moosh like goot old dimes,
To come dose games again.
Yet vhen he lossed a hundred francs,
He sadly toorned afay,
"I'd rader keep de tiger here,
Dan vight him, any day."
Und shtanding py de daple,
He saw a French lorette
Vat porrowed shpecie all around,
Und lossed at efery bet.
"Id's all de same mit dis or dat,
Or any kind of sin,
De lorette or de rolette - bot'
Will make de money shpin."
He trinket of Le Pouhon well,
Und from La Sauveniere;
He tried it ad de Barisart,
Und auch de Geronstere.
"Dey say dat Troot' lie in a well,
So trink from all we can,
Und here we'll prove dat Troot is Health,"
Dat's so, sayd Breitemann.
So long in ruined Franchimont
He sat on hollowed ground,
Und dinked of Wilhelm de la Marck,
Who'd raked dat coontry round.
"Mein Gott! how id vas mofe mine heart
To read in hishdory,
Und find de scattered shinin lights
Of vellers shoost like me!
"Dis nople boar-pig of Ardennes,
Dis shtately Wallowin lord,
Vas make him vamous py de pen,
Und glorious py de swordt.
Und showed his hero-scholarship,
Vhen he wrote to de pishop, 'Satis,
Brulabo monasterium
Vestrum, si non payatis.'
"Dey say dat in de keller here
Dere lifes a coblin briest,
Dereto a teufelsjagersmann
Vot guard a specie chest.
O if I vonce could find de vay,
Und spot dat box of checks,
I voonder shoost how long 'twould pe
Pefore I'd twis deir necks."
Vhere plashin brooklets ring,
He see vhere in de water wild
De wood-birds flip deir wing.
"Ash de prooklet's lost in de rifer,
Und de rifer's lost in de sea,
Mine soul kits lost on water 'plain,'"
Says Breitemann, says he.
Und ash he walked de Meyerbeer
He marcked, peside de way,
A rock shoost like a wild boar's head,
Vraie tete du sanglier.
Der Breitmann heafe a shiant sigh,
Und say mit 'motion grand:
Von crate idee ish uber all
In dis der Schweinpig's land.
He drafel troo de Val d'Ambleve,
He lounge de schweet Sept Heures,
He shdare indo de window-shops,
Und see de painted ware.
He looket at de fans und dings,
Denn said, "To tell de trut',
Dere's painted vares more dear ash dis
Oop shdairs in La Redoute."
Und sittin in de Champignon,
Vitch rose 'neat Lofe's schweet hand,
He read in books of Marmontel,
Id's nice to see Simplicitas
Rococoed oop mit vlowers,
Und dink soosh virtue shdill may life
In dis base vorldt of ours.
'Tvas here, oopon de Spadoumont
Deir gottashe used to set;
'Tvas here they keeped von simple cow
Likevise an lettuce-bett.
Berhaps I hafe crown vorldly since,
Yet shdill may druly say,
Dat in mine poyhood's tays I vas
Apout so good ash dey.
But he vot vant to see dis land,
Und has nod time for all:
Eash woodland nook und shady brook;
On Herr Marcette shouldt call.
For he has baintet all to live
Vhen de drees demselfs are gone;
Und shoost so goot as artist, auch,
Ish he bon compagnon.
Farevell, schveet Spa - dou home of vlowers,
Of ruin and of rock,
Vhere vild pirds sing und de band ish blay
Eash day at sefen o'clock.
If all de shbrees dat Spa has seen
Vere melted into von,
De soul vouldt reach Nirwana - lost
In transcendental fun.
"Hupsa! jonker Jan,
Die wel ruiter worden kan."
BOON tidings to der Breitmann came
Ash he at table end,
Dere's right goot fisch at Blankenberghe,
Und oysters in Ostend.
Denn to Ostland ve will reiten gaen,
To Ostland o'er de sand,
Dou und I mit pridle drawn
For dere ish de oyster land.
Und vhen dey shtood bei Ostersee,
Vhere de waters roar like sin,
Dere coom five hundert fischer volk
To dake der Breitmann in.
"Gotts doonder!  Should ve doomple down
Amoong de waters plue,
I kess you'd vant more help from me
Dan I should vant from you!
"If you hat peen vhere I hafe peen
Und see vot I hafe see,
Vhere de surf rise oop nine tausend feet,
In de land of Nieuw Jarsie
Und schwimmed dat surf ash I hafe schwimmed,
Peside de Jersey stran'"-
From dat day fort' de Ostland men
Shdeered glear of der Breitemann.
Boot von ding set him schvearin so,
I dinked he'd nefer cease,
De Ostend oysters kostet more
Hans asked an anciendt fisherman,
To 'splain dis if he may,
Und says he, "Mijn Heer - dey're beter hier
Als ein hundert leagues afay.
"Und as de oysters beter hier
Of course dey kostet more"-
Der Breitmann dook his bilcrim shdaff,
Und toorned him to de toor.
Says Hans, "De Vlaemsche fischermen
Can sheat de vorldt I pet
Dey sheaten von anoder too,
All's fisch to a Dutchman's net.
"Der king peginned a palace hier,
De palace hat to shtop,
He foundt de beoples sheaten so
He gife de bildin oop.
Aldough das Leben hier ish goot,
Ad least Ostend-sibly"-
So shpoke der Breitemann und cut
Dat city py de sea.
"Wie kennt die stad waer alles nog
Van Vlaenderens grootheid spreekt?
Waer ontrouw, valschheid en bedrog
Van schaemte nog verbleekt?"
If I hat gold, as I hafe time,
I tells you how 'tvere shpent,
On efery year I'd shtay a week
In Vlanderen's hoofstad, Gent.
For, oh! de sveet wild veelins,
In dat stad do mofe me so,
Vhen I'd dink of all de clorious men
Vot life dere long aco.
If efer man hat manly heart,
He'd veel dat heart to beat,
Vhen mit de oldten dime of Ghent
He valks troo efery shdreet.
Und ach! de volk are yet so goot,
It gave me soosh a pliss,
Vhen I hear a bier-hous spielman sing
A melodie like dis:-
"Het was op eenen Monday,
All on a Monday free,
Dat mijnheere Jacob Van Artevelde
Unto his men said he:
He seide - 'Mijn lief gesellen,
Ve all moost ride out land,
And trive our way to Bruges town
"Und as he oonto Brussel cam,
De meisjes sprong from bed,
Und found Mynheere Van Artevelde
Mit a cross-bolt troo his head."
Und shoost pecause dis bier-hous song
Recht troo my heartsen vent,
I feel dat I could life und die
All in de down of Gent.
IN dis boem, mein freund der Herr Breitmann hafe his fiews on art
art, und maket efery podies from Baumgartner doun to Fischer und
Taine, look shoost like puddin-headet old gasbalgs.  Boot to de
technik de first of all Holland malers), vas nefer paint nodings
Hans reitet troo de Nederland,
From Rotterdam below,
Und Haarlem - all a row;
He shtoodit in de galleries
A tausend works of art;
Vent most teepest to his heart.
Und dus exglaim der Breitmann
In woonder-solemn shdrain,
"De cratest men vere Brauwer,
Der Raffael vas vel enof;
Dat ish in his shmall vay;
Coompared mit soosh as dey?
"Shoost see dat vight of troonken boors-
Von tears de oder's goat:
Vhile de oder mit a pointet knife
Ish goin for his troat.
Und a madchen mit a tree-leg shtuhl
Ish clip him on de het,
In dese higher human passion valks,
Der Raffael's coldt und deadt.
"De more ve digs into de eart'-
Or less ve seeks a star,-
De nearer ve to Natur coom,
More pantheistich far;
To him who reads dis myst'ry right,
Mit insbiration gifen,
Der Raffael's rollen in de dirt,
Vhile Brauwer soars to Heafen.
TIS shveet to valk in Holland towns
Apout de twilicht tide,
Vhen all ish shdill on proad canals,
Safe vhere a poat may clide.
Shdrange light on darkenin vater falls,
In long soft lines afar,
Der abenddroth on dunkelheit,
Vitch shows - or hides - a star.
De pridges risen all aroundt
So quaindly, left und right,
Pedween each pridge und shattow, lies,
A lemon of yellow light,
Und das volk a-goin ober,
So darklin onwarts pass,
Dey look like Chinese shattows - shown
Apofe a lookin-glass.
All shdiller grows, und shdiller,
Sogar die efenin preeze,
Ish only heardt far ober het
In dese long lines of drees;
A real oldt Holland feelin
Cooms gadderin ober all,
You'd nefer dink a sturm hat peen
De nople houses! - how dey'd mofe
An old New Yorker's heart,
Time vas - twix dese und dose at home
You couldn't tell 'em part,
Mit crate brass knockers on de toors,
Und parlors town so low
You see de crates a glowin prite
O'er carbets ash you go.
Dere's comfort-full of avery dings,
You veel it ash you look,
You knows de volks ish opulend,
Und keep a bully cook;
Und oopon de high camine,
Or here und dere on shelf,
Pe mingled oop mit delf.
Dere's noding in dis Holland life,
Vitch seems of present day,
De fery shildren in de shdreeds
Look quaintlich as dey blay;
De liddle rosy housemaids,
In bicdures vell I know,
De dames und heers hafe all an air
Of sixdy years ago.
They may dalk of anciendt hishdory
Und for romantisch seek,
De ding dat mofes most teeply ish
Old-vashioned - not antique.
O if you live in Leyden town
You'll meet, if troot' pe told,
De forms of all de freunds who tied
Vhen du werst six years old.
Ride oud oopon de sand,
Und vait to hear a paardeken;
Coom tromplin from de land.
He vaited vhen de boeren volk
Vent oud oopon de plain,
He vaited dill de veary crows
Flew nestwarts home acain.
He vaited ash de wild fox vaits
In long-some hoonger noth,
He vaited dill de flitterin bats
Vere plack on Abendroth.
Id's woe to watch for taily bread
Or bide forgotten call,
Boot oh, to vait for heartsen lofe
Ish veariest of dem all.
"O dat ish not mine laity's prooch
Shoost now so star-like shined,
O dat ish not mine laity's haar
Soft floatin on de wind.
Her goot crayhound mit soosh a step
Vas nefer vont to go,
Und dat is niet her paardeken
Whose shtep so vell I know.
"Dat light ish speer light from a lanz
Vitch'll part mine pody und soul,
De floatin haar is a pennon gay
Or wafin banderol.
De crayhound ish a ploot-hound wild
Vitch long has dracked me here,
Und het paardeken ish a var-horse
Vot has hoonted me like deer."
Well shpoke Mijn Heer van Torenborg
All drue vas afery wordt,
For dey bored him troo mit lanzen,
Und dey hewed him mit de swordt.
Dey killt him armloss, harmlos;
De plooty reiver band;
Und puried him so careloosly
Dat his vace shtick out de sand.
Boot e'er night's plack hat toorned to red
Or e'er de stars vere gone,
Dere came de shtep of a paardeken
Soft tromplin, tromplin on.
A laity fair climped off on him
Und trip mit dainty toes:-
Boot oh, mijn Gott! - how she vas shkreem
Ven she trot on her drue lofe's nose!
"Oh vot ish dis I trots opon?
Id's shape fool well I know,
Dere nefer yet vas flower like dis,
Dat in de garten crow.
Dere nefer yet vas fruit like dis
Ash ripen on a dree;
Dat kan ik blainly see.
"Dat heerlijk nose, van Torenborg,
Ish known of anciend dime,
'Tis writ in olten chronikel
Und sung in minsdrel rhyme.
Und dis, de noblest of de race
Since hishdory pegans,
Ish shtickin here - shdraighdt out de dirt,
Shoost like some boer manns.
"Oh cuss de man dat mordered him!
Ach, cuss him oop and down,
Ja - cuss him troo de forest roads,
Und tamn him in de toun!
Und burn his vater und moder,
Vhere'er deir vootshteps vall,
Mit his schwesters und his broders,
assistant
Sure, a continuation for this poem could be:
  De teufel rake dem all!
"May afery cuss dat e'er vas cusst,
Since cussin foorst pegan;
Pe hoorled in von drementous cuss,
Acainsdt dat nasdy man!
From de foorst crate cuss on Adam,
To de smalles' of de crop"-
Here de tead man gafe a shifer,
Und gry oud - "For Gott's sake - shdop!
"Dere's a cerdain lot of shwearin,
Vitch anger alvays crafes;
Boot spite like dat's enof to pring
De tead men from deir craves.
I can't lie here no longer,
Und hear soosh pizen pain;
Und since you've shtirred me out, I kess
I'll coom to life acain."
Mit von drementous shkreem of pliss,
His drue lofe shtood de shock,
Den catcht him wildly py de nose,
"Ach Torenborg - lev'st du nock!
Ach ja - du aint'st nod tead yet!
Dere's life shdill lef' pehind,
Gott pless de dat lef' dy nose,
Shdill wafin in de wind."
Mit hands all ofer diamonds,
She loosed de sand apout,
Mit an oyster-shell so wildly
She digged her lofer out.
"Und now dou'rt in free air, lofe!
Who warst shoost now in sand!
Dere vasn't ish a nicer man,
Vhere vas dit liedeken written,
Vhere vas dit liedeken sing,
Dat had gedone Hans Breitmann,
In de town of Schevening!
'Tvas written ober Rheinwein,
'Tvas written ober bier-
Und wer das lied gesungen hat,
Gott geb ihm ein glucklich's jahr.
TO Amsterd-m came Breitmann
All in de Kermes tide;
Yonge Maegden allegader
Filled de straat on afery side.
De meisjes in de straaten
Vere tantzin alle nacht long;
Dere vas kissen, dere vas trinken,
Mit a roar of Holland song.
Who went into de straaten
Ven de sonn had gone his day,
De Dootch gals quickly grapped him
Und tantzed him wild avay.
Who fell among dese wags;
Dey tantzed him off in a carmagnole,
Und sent him home in rags.
Und den at afery gorner,
So peaudifool to see,
De volk vas bilin dough-nuts,
Or else vas fryin tea.
Und Kermes cakes mit boetry,
Vitch land-volk dinks a dreat,
Mit all of Barnum's blayed out shows
In dents along de shdreet.
Id pring de tears to Breitmann's eyes,
To find in many a shtand
Vot oft he'd baid a quarder for
To see in a distand land.
De Aztec dwins und de Siamese
(Dough soom vere a wachsen sham);
All here in Amsterdam
De fashion here in Nederland
Ish not vot you'd soopose,
Mit oos, men bays de vomens,
Boot de Dootch gals hires deir beaux!
Dey hire dem for de season,
Und because moosh rain ish fell,
Dey alvays bays a higher brice,
For a man mit an umberell.
Und dere vas Nord Hollander maids,
So woonderfool to see,
Mit caps of gold und goldne pins,
Und quaint orfeverie.
Mit silber bootons gay;
Und silber belts, und silber knives,
Mijn Gott! - how sdrange vere dey!
But dough de men wore silber gear,
Und de vrouws in gold were tall,
De gals vere gabblin all de dimes,
Und de men said noding at all.
"Dey say dat sbeech is silbern,
Boot silence golden pe,
Dat aint de vay dey vork id here,"
Said Breitemann, said he.
Goot Gott! how Breitmann vent it,
In moonlighdt or in rain;
Den vakened to Schied-m it,
Ven de mornin peamed again.
For to solfe von awfool broplem,
He vas efer shdill incline;
If - den wijn is beter als de min,
Or - de min doet veel meer als de wijn.
Dwo weeks der Breitmann studiet,
Vile he vent it on de howl.
He shpree so moosh to find de troot,
Dat he lookt like a bi-led owl.
Den he say, "Ik wil honor Bacchus,
So long as ik leven shall;
Boot not so moosh vercieren
As to blace him ofer all.
De rose of lofe is lofely
In zomer ven it plow;
De bush shdill gifes a bromise,
In winter mid de shnow;
Ja, als de bloeme is geplukt,
En van den steel genomen,
Ve know de peautiful vill life,
Till zomer is gekomen.
Boot oh dose vas arch-heafenly dimes,
Ven by mine lofe I sat;
Und see de maedchen pring de grapes,
Und crash dem in a vat.
Und ven her glances unto mine
In plessfool ropture toorn;
I dink dere ne'er vas no dwo crapes
Like dem plue eyes of hern.
Wat is soeter als de trinken,
Ja - niet kan beter zyn.
Niet is soeter as de minne,
It smackt nog beter als wijn.
Es giebt nichts wie die Madchen,
Es gibt nichts wie das Bier,
Wer liebt nicht alle beide,
Wird gar kein Cavalier.
O vot ve vant to quickest come
Ish dat vot's soonest gone.
Dis life ish boot a passin from
de efer-gomin-on.
De gloser dat ve looks ad id,
De shmaller it ish grow;
Who goats und spurs mit lofe und wein,
He makes it fastest go.
HOW wunderschon das Vaterland
In audumn-life abbears;
Vot rainpows gild ids vallies crand,
Ven seen troo vallin tears.
Und VON I'll creet mit sang und klang,
Und drown in goldnen wein;
Old Deutschland's cot her sohn again:
Hans Breitmann's on der Rhein.
Und doughts ish schwell dat mighdy heart,
Too awfool for make known;
Ven dey shunt him from de railroat car
Und tropped him in Cologne.
De holy towers of de dome
Cleam, twilicht-veiled, afar;
Und like some lonely bilgrim's pipe,
Dim shines de efenin star.
Hans look to find his baggage check,
Und see dat all ish shdraighdts,
Denn toorn him to de city toors,
"Mein nadife land - wie gehts?"
Boot dat's vot all who read may run-
Fool blainly armies write;
Id's ofer all half Shermany,
Set down in Black and White.
Vot dings ish dis to see?
I vonder vot in future years
Your mission ish to pe?
Also in crate America
We had soosh colors too!
Die Farb' sind mir nicht unbekannt-
Id's shoost tout comme chez nous.
He vent de dings to view,
Und found it shoost drei thaler cost
To see de sighds all troo.
"Id's tear," said Hans; "boot go ahet,
I'fe cot de cash all right;
Boot id's queer dat's only Protestands
Vot mosdly see de sighdt!
"Im Mittelalter I hafe read
De shoorsh vas alvays sure-
An open bicdure gallerie,
Und book for all de poor.
Boot now de dings is so arrange
No poor volk can get in;
Pout all ash shbends de tin.
"I shmiles like Mephistopheles
In shoorshes ven I see
Poor Catholics vollerin round apout
To shdeal a sighdt - troo ME!
Dey peep und creep roundt chapel gates,
Boot soon kits trofe afay,
Dey gross demselfs, und make a brayer-
Boot den dey cannot bay!
"Dese Deutsche sacrisdans might learn
More goot in Italy,
Where beoples bays shoost half de brice,
For ten dimes more to see,
De volk vot dink I shbeak sefere
Apout dese Kuster vays,
May read vot Mr. Badeker
In his Belgine Hand Buch says."
Und valkin oop und town de down
Von ding vas shdill de same:
Shoost ash of oldt he saw de shpread
Of Jean Farina's name.
He find it nort', he find it sout',
He find it eferyvhere;
Dere vas no house in all Cologne
Boot J. M. F. vas dere.
De best Cologne in all Cologne
I'll shwear for cerdain sure,
Ish maket in de Julichsplatz
Let dis pe understood,
Dat some of id ish foorst-rate pad,
Vhile some is foorst-rate good.
Boot von ding drafellers moost opserve,
Dis treadful trut I dells,
Fast ash dis Farinaceous crowd
So vast hafe grown the schmells-
Dose awfool schmells in gass' und strass'
Vitch mofe crate Coleridge squalm:
If so he wrote, vot vouldt he write
Apout dem now, py tam?
Of all de schmells I efer schmelt,
Py gutter, sink, or well,
At efery gorner of Cologne
Dere's von can peat dat schmell.
Vhen dere you go you'll find it so,
Don't dake de ding on troost;
De meanest skunk in Yankee land
Vould die dere of disgoost.
Boot noding dinked der Breitmann
Of schmutz or idle schein,
Und looket owd on der Rhein
Im goldnen gleam - vhile pealin far
Rang shlow, shveet kloster bells,
Und in de dim, plue peaudiful,
Rose distant Drachenfels.
Dey trinket lieb Liebfrauenmilch
So pure ash voman's trut';
De singed de songs of Shermany,
De songs of Breitmann's yout'.
De songs mit tears of vanished years,
Made peaudiful in wein.
Dus endet out de firster tay
"Were diu werlt alle min,
Von deme mere unze an den Rin.
Des wolt ih mih darben,
Daz diu dame von Engellant
Lege an minen armen."
In boat oopon der Rhein!
De castle-bergs soft goldnen
Mit lots of Rudesheimer,
Und saitenklang und sang,
Und laties singin lieder,
Ash ve go sailin 'long.
Und von fair Englisch dame
Vas dere, so wunderscheen;
Vene'er der Breitmann saw her,
Id made his heartsen pain.
Oh, dose long-tailed veilchen Augen,
Vitch voke soosh hopes und fears,
Deir shape vas nod like almonds,
Boot more like fallin tears.
Und shpecdagles were o'er dem,
De glass of pince-nez kind,
In mercy to de beoples,
Less dey pe shdrucken blind.
Und gazin in dem glasses,
Reflected he pehold
De Rhine, mit all de shdeam-poats,
Und crags in Sonnengold.
De signs upon de bier-haus;
De gals a-washin close;
De wein-garts on de moundain,
Like heafenly shdairs in rows:
De banks, basaltic-paven,
Like bee-hife cells to view;
A donkey shtandin on dem,
Likevise her lofer too.
All dis oopon dos glasses
Vas blainly to pe seen;
One saw whate'er vas nodiced,
Py de schone Englandrinn.
Boot oh! de fery lofe-most
Of all dat lofe-most pe
Her own plue veilchen Augen-
Herself she couldt not see.
For beaudy oft we spied,
Nor know de cratest peaudy
Ish in our soul inside.
Mein Gott! Vot himmlisch shplendor
Vas seen mitout an toubt,
If some crate bower supernal
Vas toorn oos insite out!
Und gazin long on Natur,
Und gazin long on Man,
Shdill all dings glite voruber,
Ash since de vorldt pegan:
Ash in dat laity's glasses,
Ve see dem bassin py;
Yet veel a soul beneat' dem,
A schweet eternal eye.
O schone Englisch maiden
Mit honey-colored hair,
Dat flows ash if a beinen korb
Had got oopsettet dere-
Und all de schweetness of your soul
Vas dripplin from your brain!
Oh shall I efer meet mit dir
Oopon dis eart' acain?
O Englisch engel maiden!
O schveet betaubend dofe!
O Rheinwein und cigarren!
O luncheon, mixed mit lofe!
O Liebeslust und pein!
Dus ents de second chapterlet
HE shtood peside de Kloster-place,
Oopon de Rheinisch shore,
Und dere he saw a lofely face,
He'd seen in treams pefore.
"Feinslieb, und will'st dou go mit me?
Feinsllieb, make no delay;
For rocks ish shdeep und vales ish teep,
Und dings ish in de way."
"Und oh! how can I go mit dir,
Or flyen out of land?
Der bischof holts me py de law,
Der Rheingraf by der hand.
"Liebsherz, if dou could'st landwarts gehn,
I'd follow willingly;
Boot we are leafs, und shdrong's de shdem
Vitch pinds oos to de dree."
"Der briest who helt dee py de law
Ish now a broken man;
Der Rheingraf who vouldt marry dee
Ish in der Kaisar's ban.
"Und if de Kloster-beoples here
Vill shdop your goin to town,
Bei Gott! I'll burn von half of dem,
De oder half I'll trown!
"Denn linger not to back dy drunk,
Boot led our lofe hafe vings;
Dere's milliners in fair Cologne,
Vill make you avery dings."
She toorn her eyes im mondenschein,
She schmile so heafenly;
"Dear lofe, so shendle und so goot!
I'll cut away mit dee.
"Und do not killl de Kloster-volk,
'Tvouldt only bring tiscrace!
Dough if I had de abbess here,
Lort! how I'd slap her vace!"
De moonlighdt blayed oopon de drees,
It shined oopon de blain,
Two forms rode in de mitnight woods,
Und nefer coomed again.
"Vot ish Art?  Id ish somedings to drink, objectively
foregebrought in de Beaudiful.  Doubtest dou? - denn read, ash
I hafe read, de Dyonisiacs of Nonnus, and learn dat de
oopboorstin of infinite worlds into edernal Light und mad goldnen
Ha! ha!  I poke you dere!"
-     Caupo Recauponatus, MS. by Fritz Swackenhammer, olim
"Cerevisia bibunt homines
Animalia ceterae fontes."
In a field of goldnen parley
Goot King Gambrinus shlept,
Und treamin' pout de dursty volk,
Dey say he gried und vept.
"In all mine land of Nederland,
Dere crows no mead or wein,
Und wasser I couldt nefer get
Indo dis troat of mein.
"Now hear me on, ye headen gotts!
Und all de Christian too;
Und Marie tressed in plue!
Und mighdy Thor, der donner gott,
Und any else dat be!
Der von as helps me in dis Noth,
His serfant I will pe."
Und ash dis sinfull headen
All in de parley lay,
Dere coom in tream an angel
Who soft dese worts tid say:
"Stay oop, dou boor Gambrinus!
For efen all aroundt
Im parley vhere dou shleepest,
Some dings goot to trink ish found.
"Im parley vhere dou shleepest
Dere hides a trink so clear,
Dat men will know zukunftig-
Ash porter- ale- or bier."
Und denn in Nederlandisch
He put de konig troo,
Und gafe him - allwhile treaming-
De recipe to prew.
Oop rose der goot Gambrinus,
Und shook him in de sun:
"Go vay, ye sinfool headen gotts!
Mit you its out und done!
Ye'fe left me mit mine beoples
In error und in durst,
Till in our treadful tryness,
Ve tont know vitch is wurst."
Dat vas der goot Gambrinus
Oonto his palac't vent,
Und loafers troo de Nederland
To all his lordts he sent.
"Leave Odin - or you lose your hets!"
De order vas sefere,
Yet tinged mit mildness, for he sent
De recipe for bier.
O den a merry sound vas heardt
Of bildin troo de land,
Und de kirchen und de braweries
Vent oop on efery hand;
For de masons dey vere hart at vork,
Und trinkin hart at dat,
Und some hat bricks mitin de hods,
Und some mitin deir hat.
Dey prew it in de Nederland,
Dey prew it on de Rhine;
Boot in de oldt Bavarian land,
Dey make it shdrong und fein.
Und he dat trinks in Munich,
Ash all goot vellers know,
Has got somedings to dink apout,
Hafe you heardt of Kong Gambrinus?
If you hafen't id vas gueer,
For he vas de first erfinder
Und de holy saint of bier.
Und his bortrait, mit a sceptre,
Fery peaudifool to see,
Hangs on afery lager-bier house,
In de land of Germanie.
Efery vhere de whole world ofer,
Deutschers paint him on de sign,
As a broof dat dey are dealin
In de Bok und Lager line.
Crown und bier-mug, robe und ermine;
German signs of empire, dese,
Mit a long white beard a fallin'
Fery nearly to his knees.
Vonce dis bier-saint, pright und early,
Rose from bett und vent his vay,
To a dark mysderious gastle,
Vhere his lager-donjon lay.
Vhile de lark's first song vas ringin',
Und die roses shone in dew,
Den his soul vas shoost in order
To enshoy de early brew.
Deeply, awfooly he schwilled it,
Till de vaults seem toornin round;
Und vhile tipsy - over tips he-
In he falls - und dere is trowned.
Yet vhile goorglin in de bier-fass,
Biously he gafe his soul:
"Gott verdammich! Donnerwetter!
Himmels sacrament-a-mol!"
Dere dey found der kong "departed,"
Not mitout his stir-up cup:
Moosh dey woonderd dat he berishet
Vhen he might hafe troonk it oop;
Or dat his long peard vitch floatet
Fool a yard on efery side,
Hadn't buoyed him from destrugdion:-
Dus der beer-dead monarch died.
"Sankt Martin war ein frommer Mann
Trank gerne Cerevisiam,
Und hatt er kein Pecuniam
So liess er seinen Tunicam."
VONCE oopon a dimes in Frankfort der Herr Breitemann exsberiencet
"Mein Frack ist im Pfand-haus."
Mine tress-goat is shpouted, mine tress-goat aint hier,
Vhile you in your ball-ropes go splurgin, mein tear!
To barties mit you I'm infitet you know,
Boot my pest coat ish shpouted - mine poots are no go.
To hell mit mine Onkel - dat rasgally knafe!
Dis pledgin und pawnin has mate me his slafe!
Ven I dink of his sign-bost, den dree dimes I bawl,
Vhile mine plack pants hang lonely und dark on de wall.
Goot night to dee fine lofe - so lofely und rich,
Mein tress-goat ish shpouted - gon-fount efery stitch!
I dinks dat olt Satan troo all mine affairs,
Lofe, business, und fun, has peen sewin his tares.
My tress-goat ish shpouted - mine tress-goat aint here,
While you in your glorie go shinin, mein tear,
Und de luck of der teufel ish loose ofer all,
Vhile my black pants hang lonely und dark on de wall.
Dis four-goin song vas over-set by der Hans Breitmann from de
German of Wilhelm Caspary, whose lyric vas a barody on a
dranslation made indo Deutsch by Freiligrath from anoder boem py
Sir Waldherr Scott, vitch Sir Waldherr vas kit de idee of from an
"My hearts in de Hielands, mein hearts ish nae hier,
Mein hearts in de Hielands, in wilden revier;
It hoonts for de shtag, und id hunts for de reh,
Mein hearts ist im Hochland wo immer ich geh."
Dis is de original Scotch, as goot as I can mineself rememper it.
perplexified dransitions from Scotch to English, and dence into
phrase too familiar to mine readers to require any wider
complication.
DERE'S lighds oopon de Appian,
Dey shine de road entlang;
Und from ein hundert tombs dere brumms
A wild Lateinisch song;
It rings from Nero's goldnen haus;
Evoe! - here he coom!
Fly oud, ye moenads, from your craves!-
Hans Breitmann's got to Rome!
For vhile de lamp holts oud to purn,
Or von goot shpark ish dere,
Dere's hope for all of dem whose lives
Ish doun in Lempriere.
Von real, shenuine heathen
Is coom at last to home;
Ye shleepin gotts, lift oop your hets-
Hans Breitmann lifes in Rome!
Dere-to der Maia's sohn,
Ish all unite in Breitmann
To make a stunnin one.
Ist shmile to see him come;
De Vesta only toorn her pack
He vented to de Vacuum,
Vhere de Bope ish keep his bulls;
Boot couldn't vind dem, dough he heardt
Dat all de blace vas fools.
Dere ish here and dere some ochsen,
Right manivest I see;
Boot de bools all comes from Irish priests,
Said Breitemann, said he.
Und goin' py de Vacuum,
Und passin' troo de yard;
Mein Gott! how vas he stoomple, vhen
He see der Schweitzer guard,
Mit efery kinds of colors tresst,
Like shtreamers in de van.
"Hans Wurst ist stets ein Deutscher g'west,"
Das marked der Breitemann.
Und dus replied an guartsmann:-
"I shoys to see you here:
Dazu a halberthier.
Dis purpur kleid of yellow-plue
Vas made, ash I hafe heard,
Der tailor of our guard.
"Ve're shoost von hoondert dirty strong,
Ve list for twenty year;
De serfice ist not pad, boot dis-
Verdamm das Romisch bier!
For ven mit birra gazzosa
A maiden fills my glass,
She might ash vell gife gift ash say-
'Feinslieb, ich schenk dir dass!'"
Und dus rebly der Breitmann:-
Ein Deutscher toorned Italian, ish
Il diavolo in carnato.
Your clothes are like infernal flames,
Dey burn my fery soul;
Boot to-night we'll trink togedder - nun
Lieb'landsmann lebe wohl!"
At de Sherman artisds' festa,
Vhere all vas pright und fair,
'Tvas fairer und more prighterfull
Vhen Breitmann enter dere.
Und der vaiters in de Greco
(So long he trinked und sot)
Vas called him L'Ubbriacone-
'Tvas de name der Breitmann got.
He saw a veller in de shtreet,
Vot sell some friction-matches;
De kind dey call Infallible,
For dey blazes ven you scratches.
Dey dragged him off to brison,
Und tied him mit a rope;
For in Rome dere's nix Infallible,
Dey said, excebt de Bope.
Hans see de crate Prometheus,
In Corsini's gallery hang;
He tought apout de matches,
Und it made his heart go bang.
It's risk to carry light apout,
Too cheap for efery man;
How de Lucifers is fallen!
Ita dixit Breitmann.
He got among de Bope's Zouaves,
Dey trinked from morn to night;
Den frolicked colle belle
Ontil de shky crew pright.
It blease der Breitmann vonderfool,
And dus he often say:
"Zouaviter in modo ish
Der real Roman way."
Boot oh, his heart burned vild mit fire,
His eyes gefilled mit tears,
At de gotts in efery bilder saal,
Mit goats' legs, tails, und ears.
Und he sopped - "Ach liebes Deutschland,
Bist here on every hand?
Was machst du Mephistopheles
So weit im Walschen Land?"
Boot de wood-nymphs boorst out laughin,
Der Garten-gott dere to,
Und sait - "Oldt Hans! vile you're apout
Ve nefer can look blue."
Den Pan blay on his Syrinx,
To de tune of Mary Blane,
"Don't gry pecause ve're out of town,
Ve're coming pack again.
"Von day you got de yolk und vhite,
De next day only shells;
Von day dey holts a council,
Und de next day - 'someding else!'
Id's bopes und kings, und gotts and dings,
Oopon dis eartly ball;
Boot for me id's all von frolic,
Und a high oldt carnival!
"Rise oop, dou Odin-trafeler,
Und toorn dee to de Nort,
Wherefrom, as Bible dells dee,
Crate efil shall come fort.
Dere is mutterins in Ravenna,
Und ere long dere'll come a turn,
A real hell-bender from de land
"Und ven der Breitmann's prototype,
Cooms tromplin, tromplin troo de fern,
To give dis coontry hell.
Der is shtorm all in de air,
Dy Gotts vill gife dee vork, mein Sohn,
Hans Breitmann shall be dere!"
For a yar will nod be ofer
Pefore de Frantsch will run,
Und de game at last be ented,
Und Italy pe won.
Und denn in roarin battle,
For hishtory so grand,
Dy banner'll lead de Uhlan spears,
Nota bene. - Dis boem was all written in 1869, pefore de
"Robusti sono i fatti."
Dey've cot a flight of shdairs,
More woonderful ash nefer vas,
As Latin pooks declares.
For you kits your sins forgifen,
If you glimes dem knee py knee;
It's such a gitten up a stairs,
I nefer yet did see.
Now as Breitmann vas a vaitin
Among some demi reps,
Ascensionem expectans,
To see dem glime de steps,
Dere came a sinful scoffer,
Who his mind had firmly set
To go dem holy sdairs afoot,
Und do it on a bet!
Boot shoost as he vas startet,
To make dis sassy go,
Der Breitmann caught him py de neck,
Und tripped him off his toe!
Und den dere come de skience,
A la prenez gardez vous;
For he bung his eye and bust his shell,
Und shplit his noshe in dwo.
De briests vere so astonish,
To see him lam de man,
Dat dey shvore a holy miracle
Vas vork by Breitemann.
Says Breitmann, "I'm a heretic,
But dis you may pe bound,
No chap shall mock relishious dings
Vhile I'm a bummin round.
"Und you owes me really noding,
For as I'll plainly show,
At last I've found out someding
Vot I alfays vant to know.
Und now dat I have found it,
In de newspapers I'll brag:
Evviva!  Ho trovato,
Vot means a Scala-Wag."
"Altri beva il Falerno, altri la Tolfa.
Toscana re, dite
Pra ch'io parli dite."
"Si regressum feci metro
Retro ante, ante retro-
Quid si graves sunt acuti?
Si accentus fiant muti?
Quid si placide, plene, plane
Fregi frontem Prisciani?-
Sat est Verbum declinavi
Titubo-titubas-titubavi."
VON efenin ash der Breitmann vent from his weinhaus vinkin,
So peepy mit Falernian vitch he vas starkly trinkin,
Der Breitmann poot de triangel oopon his het, and whistled,
Den rop de cloak around his form, and down de Corso mizzled.
De beoples gazed mit staunischment as bey dem he go vheelin,
He look ganz oltra tramontane, so twisty vas his reelin.
Next tay in Vaticano, while he shtared at frescoes o'er him,
He proke two holes in de bavement - und likevise shblit
his preeches.
"Ego video," says de Bope - "tu es antistes ex Almania,
Est una mala gente et corrupta con insania,
Un fons hereticorum et malorum tut terrible,
Perche non vultis che ego - il Papa - sei infallibile."
"Sit verbo venia," said Hans, "permitte, Sancte Pater,
Num verum est ut noster rum gemixta est mit water?
In coelis wo die gotter live, non semper est sereno,
Nor de wein ash goot ash decet in each spaccio di vino.
"Sunt mihi multi fratres qui si denkunt ut dicisti,
Ego kickerem illos, valide, per sanguine de Christi!
In nostro monasterio si habemus nostrum rentum
Contra infallibilita non curamus rubrum centrum.
"Viginti nostrorum nuper convenere,
In quondam capitulo, simul et dixere;
Papa vult Concilium in Romam tenere,
Quid debemus super hoc ipsi respondere?"
Et dixit noster presul, "Es ist mir omnis unus,
Si Papa est infallibilis, tanquam non sum jejunus,
Si nonus est Pius aut Pius est Nonus-
Diabolis curat.  Non accipio dieser onus.
"Si possum me jacere circum vitrum Rhenovini
Es ist mir wurst si Papa est originis divini:
Et nunc Papa noster will sich selbst zum Gott erheben.
"Ita dixit Breitmann et sanctus Pater respondit:
Me piace semper intendere tutto cio che l'on dit,
Sed tu dic mihi la sua ragione:
"Tonitrus et cespes!" dixit Johanes Breitmann.
"Si veritatem cupies, tunc ego sum der right man;
Percute semper ferrum dum caldum est et malleable,
Nunc est tuum tempus te facere infallible.
"In nostra America quum Praeses decet abire,
Die ultimo fecit omne quod posset imaginire.
Appointet ambasciatores et post-magistros,
Consules et alios, per dextros et sinistros.
"Quum Rex Bomba ista Neapolit-anus,
Compulsus fuit to shin it - ut dixit Africanus-
Fecit ultimo die ducos et countos, vanus.
(Inter alios M'Closkey, tuus Hibernicus chanberlanus.)
"Et quia tu es; ut credo; ultimus Poporum,
Facis bene devenire, quod dicitur High Cockalorum-
Sei magnissimus toad in the puddle, ite caput, magnamente;
Et ERITIS SICUT DEUS, nemine contradicente!
"Unus error solus, Sancte Pater commisisti.
Quia primus infallible non te proclamavisti,
Nam nemo audet dicere: Papa fecit quod non est bonus.
Decet semper jactare super alios probandi onus.
'Conceptio Immaculata, hoc modo fixisti,
Et nemo audet dicere unum verbum, de isti:
Non vides si infallibilis es, et vultis es exdare,
Non alius sed tu solus hanc debet proclamare."
Tua verba sunt mi dulcior quam ostriche cum Chablis
In tutta Roma, de Alemania gente,
Non ho visto uno con si grande mente.
"Vero benedetto es - eris benedictus,
Tibi mitterem photographiam in quo sum depictus.
Tu comprendes situatio - il punto et gravamen.
Sunt pauci clerici ut te.  Nunc dico tibi. - Amen!"
"Uns ist in alten Maeren
wunders viel geseit
Von Helden lobebaeren,
von grosser Arebeit.
Von kuehnen Recken Streiten,
moht Ihr nun Wunder horen sagen."
DO oos, in anciend shdory,
Crate voonders ish peen told
Of lapors fool of glory,
Of heroes bluff und bold;
Of high oldt times a-kitin,
Of howlin und of tears,
Of kissin and of vightin,
All dis we likes to hears.
Dere growed once dimes in Schwaben,
Since fifty years pegan,
An shild of decend elders,
His name Hans Breitemann.
De gross adfentures dat he had,
If you will only look,
Ish all bescribed so truly
In dis fore-lyin book.
Und allaweil dese lieder
Vere goin troo his het,
De writer lay von Sonntay
a-shleepin in his bett;
Vhen, lo! a yellow bigeon
Coom to him in a dream,
De same dat Mr. Barnum
Und dus out-shprach de bigeon:
"If you should brint de songs
Or oder dings of Breitmann
Vhich to dem on-belongs,
Dey will tread de road of Sturm and Drang,
Die wile es mohte leben,
Und be mis-geborn in pattle-
To dis fate ish it ergeben."
Und dus rebly de dreamer:
"If on de ice it shlip,
Denn led id dake ids shanses,
Rip Sam, und let 'er rip!
Dou say'st id vill pe sturmy:
Vot sturmy ish, ish crand,
Crates heroes ish de beoples
In Uncle Samuel's land.
"Du bist ein rechter Gelbschnabel,
O golden bigeon mine,
Und I'll fighdt id on dis summer,
If id dakes me all dis line.
Full liddle ish de discount,
Oopon de Yankee peeps."
"Go to hell!" exglaim de bigeon;
Foreby vas all mine shleeps.
Dere vent to Sout Carolina
A shentleman who dinked,
Dat te pallads of der Breitmann
Should papered pe und inked.
Und dat he vouldt fixed de brintin
Before de writer know:
Dis make to many a brinter,
Fool many a bitter woe.
All in de down of Charleston,
A druckerei he found,
Where dey cut de copy into takes
Und sorted it around.
Und all vas goot peginnen,
For no man heeded mooch.
Dat half de jours vas Mericans
Und half of dem vas Dutch.
Und vorser shtill, anoder half
Had vorn de Federal plue,
Vhile de anti-half in Davis grey
Had peen Confeterates true.
Great Himmel! vot a shindy
Vas shdarted in de crowd,
Vhen some von read Hans Breitmann,
His Barty all aloud!
Und von goot-nadured Yankee,
He schwear id vos a shame,
To dell soosh lies on Dutchmen,
Und make of dem a game.
Boot dis make mad Fritz Luder,
Und he schwear dis treat of Hans,
Vos shoost so goot a barty
Ash any oder man's.
Und dat nodings vas so looscious
In all dis eartly shpeer,
Mit a plate of lager-bier.
Dat de Yankee might pe tam mit himself,
For he, der Fritz, hafe peen,
In many soosh a barty
Und all dose dings hafe seen.
All mad oopsproong de Yankee,
Mit all his passion ripe;
Und vired at Fritz mit de shootin-shtick,
Vheremit he vas fixin type.
It hit him on de occupit,
Und laid him on de floor;
For many a long day afder
I ween his het was sore.
Dis roused Piet Weiser der Pfaelzer,
Who vas quick to act und dink;
He helt in hand a roller
Vheremit he vas rollin ink.
Und he dake his broof py shtrikin
Der Merican top of his het,
Und make soosh a vine impression,
Dat he left de veller for deat.
Allaweil dese dings oonfolded,
Dere vas rows of anoder kind,
Und drople in de wigwam
Enough to trife dem plind.
Und a crate six-vooted Soudern man
Vot hafe vorked on a Refiew,
Shvear he hope to Gott he mighd pie de forms
If de Breitmann's book warn't true.
For de Sout' vas ploundered derriple,
Und in dat darksome hour
He hafe lossed a yallow-pine maiden,
Of all de land de vlower.
Bright gold doublones a hoondered
For her he'd gladly bay
Ash soon ash a thrip for a ginger-cake,
Und deem it cheap dat day.
To him antworded a Yorker
Who shoomp den dimes de boun-ti-ee:
(De only dings he lossed in de war
Was a sense of broperty.)
Says he, "Votefer you hafe dropped
Some oder shap hafe get,
Und de yallow-pine liked him petter ash you,
On dat it is safe to bet!"
Dead pale pecame dat Soudern brave,
He tidn't so moosh as yell,
Boot he drop right on to de Yorker,
Und mit von lick bust his shell.
Denn out he flashed his pig-sticker,
Und mit looks of drementous gloom,
Rooshed vildly in de pattle
Dat vas ragin round de room.
Boot in angulo, in de corner-
Anoder quarrel vas grow
'Twix a Boston shap mit a Londoner;
Und de row ish gekommen so:
De Yankee say dat de H-u-mor
Of soosh writin vas less dan small,
Dough it maket de beoples laughen,
Boot dat vas only all.
Denn a Deutscher say, by Donner!
Dat soosh a baradox
Vould leafe no hope for writers
In all Pandora's baender box.
'Twas like de sayin dat Heine
Hafe no witz in him goot or bad,
Boot he only kept sayin witty dings
To make beoples pelieve he had.
Denn de oder veller be-headed
Dat dere vas not a shbark of foon
In de pad spelt lieds when you lead dem
Into Englisch correctly done:-
Den a Proof Sheet veller respondered,
For he dink de dings vas hard,
"Dat ish shoost like de goot oldt lady
Ash vent to hear Artemus Ward.
"Und say it vas shames de beoples
Vas laugh demselfs most tead
At de boor young veller lecturin,
Vhen he tidn't know vot he said."
Hereauf de Yankee answered,
"Gaul dern it:- Shtop your fuss!"
And all de crowd togeder
Go slap in a grand plug-muss.
De Yankee shlog de Proof Sheet
Soosh an awfool smock on de face,
Dat he shvell right oop like a poonkin
Mit a sense of his tisgrace;
Boot der Deutscher boosted an ink-keg
On dop of de oder's hair:
It vly troo de air like a boomshell - denn-
Mine Gotts! - Vot a sighdt vas dere!
Denn ofer all de shapel
Vierce war vas ragin loose;
Fool many a vighten brinter
Fool many a nose mit fisten,
I ween was padly scrouged;
Fool many an eye pright gleamin
Vas ploody out-gegouged.
Do wart ufgehouwen,
Dere vas hewin off of pones;
Do horte man darinne
Man heardt soosh treadful croans.
Jach waren da die Geste,
De row vas rough and tough,
Genuoge sluogen wunden-
Dere vas plooty wounds enough.
De souls of anciend brinters
From Himmel look down oopon,
Und allowed dat in a chapel
Dere was nefer soosh carryins on.
Und Sweynheim mit Pannartz trop deers,
Oopon dis teufel's dust.
Dere vas Yankee jours extincted
Who lay upon de vloor,
Dere vas Soudern rebs destructed,
Who vouldt nefer Jeff no more.
Ash deir souls rise oop to Heafen,
Dey heardt de oldt brinters' calls,
Und Gutemberg gifed dem all a kick
Ash he histed dem ofer de walls.
Dat ish de vay dese Ballads
Foorst vere crooshed in ploot and shdorm,
Fool many a day moost bass afay
Pefore dey dook dis form.
De copy flootered o'er de preasts
Of heroes lyin todt,
Dis vas de dire peginnin-
Das war des Breitmann's Noth.
Dis song in Philadelphia
Long dimes ago pegun,
In Paris vas gondinued, und
In Dresden ist full-done.
If any toubt apout de facts,
In nople minds ish grew,
Let dem ashk Carl Benson Bristed,
He knows id all ish drue.
Und now, dese Breitmann shdories
In gebrindt in many a lant,
Dey're gestohlen und bekannt:-
"Geh hin mein Puch in alle VVelt
Steh auss was dir kompt zu!
Man beysse Dich, man reysse Dich
Nur dass man mir nichts thu!"
DERR BREITMANN hear im Turkenreich
Vas fighten high und low,
"Steh auf, oh Schwackenhammer mein!
It's dime for us to go.
Zieh dein Kanonenstiefel an,
Und schleife Dir das Schwert,
Schon lang her han mer nichts gethan,
Der Weg ist reitenswerth."
"Oopon vitch side?  I hartly know
Boot von side in dis war:
Dere ist de holy Russ-land
All mit a holy Tsar;
But I pe not a holy-er,
Nor you von Saint, I fear;
Out line is holy ploonder,
Mit sacred Lager-bier.
"Dere's von Constantinoble-man
Vot write to me, und say
He kits me an commission
To make me Breitmann Bey,
Und if I mounts de turpan
Und keeps de Muslin law,
Und bribes ein wenig, den I rise
"Dis much is drue, dat Toorkey is
A real Powder land,
Und if dey're goin' to touch it off,
Vy, ve moost pe on hand.
Und if ve shpring into de airs
Vhile meddlin' in de fuss,
I rader dink some Russian bears
Vill shpring along mit us."
Der Breitmann work like mad,
Und kit ein corps togeder,-
Mein Gott! vat men he had!
Ungaren, Turks, und such,
Und allerlei Gesindel.  "Hei!"
Says Hans: "dis beats de Dutch!"
Den onwards to his Schicksal
Und forvarts troo de night,
Und oopwarts to his mission,
Und downvarts in de vight.
Von night his horse he strode,
Und meet a tausand Kossacks
Pefore him on de road.
Slap forward rode der Breitmann
Right on de Kossack spears,
But forvarts coom deir leader
And halted his careers,
Und gry, "O Turkisch Ritter,
And if you want a shindy,
Step up, and I'm your man."
Dey fightet like der teufel,
Dey fightet mit deir swords,
Und Breitmann vould hafe kilt him,
But 'twas not on de cards,
For de Kossack fire a bistol
As his retreadt pegan,-
Down from his horse all senseless
Flop! went der Breitemann.
Vhen he hafe kit his senses,
Der Breitmann find he lay
Insite a nople castell,
Upon a canape;
Und py his side a lady
So wunderschon to see,
Vas shlisin oop a lemon
Indo a cop of thee.
Den to himself say Breitmann,
Aldough he hold his jaw,
"Dis is de vinest womans,
Py Gott! I efer saw.
Vot lofeliness! vot muscle!
Mit efery himmlisch charm!
She measures twenty inches,
Bei Donner! roundt de arm."
De lady see his glances
So noble und so game,
Und yust as he reflected
She dink of him de same,
Und she say, "Wie gehts?" in English,
"Du galiant cavalier,
Who art pecome de captive
All of my bow und spear.
"I am a gal dis mornin',
Yestreen I vas a knight,
Old hoss - you nearly smashedme,
I guess, in that small fight;
And if I hadn't shot you
I think I should have ran."
"But say, O nople lady,
Vot got you in dot set
Of plackgards - vilt dou dell me?"
De dame rebly: "You bet!
My father came from Boston,
And when this war began
He got a splendid contract,
All with the Russi-an,
"To sell the army shoe-strings;
But I have read of fights,
And I dream of war and glory,
For I go for women's rights;
Then I read a book of poems
Which fairly turned my head,
The ballads of Hans Breitmann"--
"Oh --- ho!" Hans Breitmann said.
"And as I think the Breitmann
Must be the greatest man
Who ever went a-fighting
Since History began,
I dressed me like a soldier,
For I am stark of limb;
With Breitmann for a model,
And try to act like him.
"Oh, tell me, noble captive,
While rolling in this storm
Which men call life, hast ever
Beheld Hans Breitmann's form?
Oh, could I once embrace him,
And gaze into his eye,
And feel his arms around me,
Then I would gladly die.
"He is the man of mortals,
The Odin of them all,
A higher Incarnation,
A being made to worship,
To me an earthly Gott"--
"Py shings!" exglaim Hans Breitmann,
"Dis ding is gettin hot!
"O laity! - nople gountess!
Dis man of whom you dink
Ish lyin' here pefore you,
Half tead for want of trink,
Likewise for lofe of you, too,
Done up mit lofe and durst,
Und mit de two togeder,
I don't know vitch is vorst.
"And dou canst safe dy hero
From bitter Todespein,
If dou hast in de Keller
Only one Fass of wein.
Nay, doubt not - in my pocket
Is dot vitch brofes de man,
My bassport, und drei tavern bills
De laity she emprace him
Oontil he nearly bust.
"Potz-blitz!" gasp out der Breitmann,
"She is a squeezer - yust!"
De dame she vas vealty,
Likewise an orphan too,
Mit a castel und a titel,
So Breitmann put it troo.
So soon the paar vere marrit,-
Hei! vot a dimes dey had!
Hei! how dey life togeder
So clorious und clad!
Now he has cot a titel
Hier hat de tale ein Ende
ICH bin ein Deutscher, und mein name is Cobus Hagelstein,
I coom from Cincinnati, and I life peyond der Rhein;
Und I dells you all a shdory dot makes me mad ash blitz,
Pout how a Yankee gompany vas shvindle me to fits.
I heardt apout dis gompany, und vished to see dot same,
Das Lebensfeuerversicherunggesellschaft vos ids name;
Dot is de name in Sherman - in English it will say
Dot it insures your life mit fire, ven you de money pay.
Now, I hod a liddle house-line vhere I life so shtill ash mice,
Und yoost drei tausand dollar vos dot little pilding's brice;
I vos always yoost so happy ash ein Kaisar in de land
Dill at last I kit in drople, for mein haus vas abgebrannt.
Den I goes undo dot gompany und dells em right afay
(Das Lebensfeuerversicherunggesellschaft), und I say,
"At last de youngest day ist coom for you to plank de cash,
And you moost bay me monies, for mine haus is purned to ash."
Den de segredary answered, "All dis is fery drue,
Boot you know ve have de option to pild your house anew;
Dere ist a lot of beoples vot burns deir hauser doun,
Den coom to kit de money pack all over in de toun."
I look indo de bapers und I find it ash he say,
Das Lebensfeuerversicherunggesellschaft need not bay;
So I dells em all to go ahet und pild anoder shdore,
Und dey make me von in Yankee shdyle more petter ash pefore.
Den I met der segredary dereafter on a day,
Of Das Lebensfeuerversicherunggesellschaft, und he say,
"You've found oos vellers honoraple und honest in our line,
Vy tont you go insure de life of Madame Hagelstein?"
I poots mine dum oopon mine nose, and vinks him mit mine eye,
Und says I cooms to do it ven de ocean runs dry,
Ven gooses turn to ganders, und de bigs kits shanged to shvine;
Oh, den I makes insure de life of Madame Hagelstein.
"I haf dried you on insurance, ash you know, yust vonce pefore,
Und ven mein haus vas abgebrannt you pild anoder shdore;
Id's drue you pild it goot enough, boot I dell you allaweil,
I vas liket id moosh petter if it vas in Sharman shdyle.
"Now, if I goes insure my wife anoder dime mit you
Inshtead of paying gelt you'd kit for me a Yankee vife!"
I poots mine dum pelow mine eye, und vinks him merrily,
Und say, "Go find soom Deutscherman dot is more creen ash me.
Dere's blendy of dem creen enough, I know, peyond der Rhein,
But none among dem wears de name of Cobus Hagelstein."
ASH on de Alapama biz,
Deep sinnin long I sat,
I dinks von ding for dinkin
Py afery Diplomat;
Und dat ist: dat voll many a ding
Vot ist de facto done,
May pe de jure unbossible,
Und officiel unknown,
Von dimes in San Franciscus,
Im Californian land,
Dere woned a Deutscher band;
Und shief among dese heroes
Dere shone Herr Fritzerl Schnall,
Who nefer vouldt pelief in nichts
Dat vas not logical.
Vell den: von tay as Fritzerl
Vas valk Dolores Shtreet,
Mein Gott! how he vas over-rush
Ein gut oldt friendt to meet;
Vot professed in Bayrisch bier-
"Gottskreuz! du alter Schlingel!"
Cried Fritz: "Was mochst du hier?"
Now in des dimes I scribe of,
Dree ways der vere bakannt,
Und only dree, to get to
De virst de Plains coom ofer;
De next, de Istmoos troo;
De dird aroundt Cape Horne,
All ofer de ocean plue.
But de first lot of surveyors
For de railroad overland,
Vas seek a new vay northwarts,
Und mit dem, der professor
Of Lager vent along;
So he kommed to San Franciscus,
Und den into dis song.
But ash unto Herr Fritzerl
Dis news vas unerheard,
He couldt not know de tidings
Wherevon he had no vord;
Und derefore dis here quesdion
He makes to Hans: "Old hoss,
I kess de vay you kit hier,
You kommed de Blains agross?"
"Nein, nein," sayt Liederschnitzerl;
"I komm not ash you say."
"Vell, den," antworded Fritzerl,
"It pe's anoder vay.
If you komm de Blains not uber,
I see vot you hafe do:
You make an longer um-way
Und gross de Istmoos troo."
"Nein, nein," acain saidt Schnitzerl,
"Dat road I nefer know,
Und vas not ride de Istmoose!"
Cried Fritz, erstaunisched, "SO
You komm de Blains not uber,
Nor gross de Istmoose troo?
Vell, den - to make de Horn aroundt
Vas all dat you could do!"
"I shvears py Gott!" says Schnitzerl,
"So sure as you vas porn,
Exshept oopon some ochsen
I nefer saw a horn.
Dat ish - mitwiles, too - while-en--
I hafe von in mine hand,
Und trink to dy Gesundheit,
Im lieben Vaterland."
Erstaunished stoot der Fritzerl:
No wort herout brought he:
Und sinned, und sinned - den sighftserd.
"Potz blitz! how vash dis pe?"
Ontill a light from Himmel
Vlash down into him shtraight,
Vlash from a bewter blate.
Den laut he cry, eye-shbarklin,
Ash droonk mit Truth tifine,
"Herr Gott! es leuch't mir ein!
If you komm de Blains not over,
Nor py Horn, nor py canal,
Den I shwears you dis, Hans Schnitzerl,
Du bist not here at all!"
Und for Pure Reason seek;
If it land you in a pog-hole,
Den die dere - like a brick!
Gott brosber all logikers,
Und pless deir nople breed;
Und so ist komm zu ende
Dis Breitmanns letzte Lied.
DOT vos a schwartz Zigeuner
Dot on a viddle played,
Und oonderneat' a fenster
He mak't a serenade.
Dot vos a lofely gountess
Said she, "Who make dot musik
Vot sound so wunderscheen?"
Dot vos de schwartz Zigainer
Who vos fery quick to twig;
Und he song a mournvoll pallad
How his hearts vos proken - big!
Dot vos de lofely gountess
Said, "Dell me who you are?"
He saidt, "Mein name is Janosch,
Dot vos de lofely gountess
Said, "Come more near to me,
I vants to dalk on piz'ness:
I'll trow you down de key."
Dot vos de moon kept lightin'
De gountess in her room,
Boot somedings moost have vrighten
De minstrel tid not coom.
Dot vos a treadfool oudgry
Ven early in de morn
Dey foundt de hens vos missin,
Und all de wash vos gone!
Dot vos a schwartz Zigeuner
Vot sot oopon de dirt
A-eatin roasted schickens
All in a new glean shirt.
FOR efery Rose dot ploome in spring,
Dey say an maid is porn;
For efery pain dot Rose vill make
Dey say dere comes a dorn.
Boot let dem say yoost vot dey will,
Dis ding I will soopose,
I'll immer prick mein finger still,
If I may pfluck die Ros'.
Ach, Rosalein, du schone mein,
Dot man vas nefer born
Vot did deserfe to win de Rose,
Vot couldt not stand de Dorn.
Blutfarbig ist die schone Ros',
Und dot ist yoost a sign
Dot I moost lose a liddle Blut
To make de Rose mein.
Wer Rosen bricht die Finger sticht;
Das ist mir ganz egal,
Der bricht sie auch in Winter nicht,
Und kits no Rose at all.
Was wir hier treiben und kosen, love,
De joy or misery,
Soll bleiben unter der Rosen, love!
Und our own secret pe!
Von Dorn ride out in hoonting gear,
Mit his horse und his Hunde too,
Und his mutter she say,
"Bring home a deer,
Mein Sohn, votefer you do!"
"You know, gewiss, dot I nefer miss,
Und ven you hear mine horn,
Pe sure dot a deer is comin' here,"
Mit his deer so fein, tra la la la!
Mit his deer so fine, tra le!
Tra la la - tra la la la!
Tra la la - la la le!
Von Dorn he ridet im greenen wood
Till dere, peneat a dree,
He sah a maid wie Milch und Blut.
As fair ash a maid could pe.
Und der Ritter he spies her great plack eyes,
"Id's petter, I'll pe shwore,
To hafe a dear oopon two feet
Dan von dot roons on four.
Mit a deer so fein, tra la la la!
Mit a deer so fine, tra le!
Tra la la - tra la la la!
Tra la la - la de le!
Der Ritter ridet pack to home:
"Ach, mutter - all ist goot;
I prings you here de finest dear
In all de greene woot."
De mutter she looks, mit joy surprise,
"Hast Recht, mein lieber Sohn;
Dere vas nefer a deer vot hafe soosh eyes
Ash de dear vot you hafe won!"
Mit her eyes so plack, tra la, la la!
Mit her eyes so plack, tra le!
Tra la la - la de le!
Nota bene. - Dis song moost pe sung mit exbression.
VEN de winter make oos shifer
Und de bonds is froze mit ice,
To shlide und shkate on de rifer,
Mit de poys und gals is nice.
Ven de horses hafe deir bits on,
Und de roats pe vite mit shnow,
To vly in a sleigh like blitzen
Is de yolliest dings I know.
"Und its high, hooray!" saidt Breitmann
"For de gals on de Dutchtown-side;
Und it's lebe hoch! for de yunglins,
Vot'll go mit de gals to ride;
Und it's hip, herje! for de drifers
Vot nefer dake no odds!
Und it's vivat! for de vellers,
Vot'll shtand de apple-tods!"
Der Breitmann pooled his mits on,
Der Breitmann crocked his vip,
"Now its fly like dunner blitzen,
Mein shildren, let 'er rip!
Like de eagles on de shtorm-cloudt
A-vlyin' to deir nest;
Dere is opple-yack a-vaitin
For de von dot times de rest.
"Oh mein Rapp, du bist de pestest
Of horses in de land!
Dou canst trafel on de grafel,
Und canst shell it on de sand!
Oh Rapp! - dere's money on id,
Ton't let de Gelt go blue!
I vants you show de beoples
Dis tay vot you can do!"
Der Breitman mit his madchen
Vas in a shblentit shleigh,
Vas yoosht agross de vay;
Mit pop-slets und mit yoompers,
Mit horses and mit mules,
Dere vas more ash vifty fellers
Come mit deir ve-hi-cules.
Id's "Ein-Zwei-Drei!" togedder
Dey hollered klein und gross,
Like de wind in shtormy wetter,
Stracks vent de Deutschers los!
Dey crock de vips like mooskets,
Dey ring from berg to berg,
"Hooray!" exsglaim Hans Breitmann:
"Dot sounds like Gettysburg!"
Vere half a mile ahet,
For ven id coom to driven,
De oder Dootch vere deadt.
Dey vly like teufel's arrows,
Mit imps oopon em gay,
Dey killt five hoondred shbarrows
Vot kit indo de vay.
Dey vly like rats und blitzen,
De fery gals vos doomb,
Und Breitmann kept his wits on,
To see vot shanse vouldt coom;
He know'd de pace dey clipped it
Moost enden in a shquall
By de vay der Laufer ripped it,
Und de shteeds vere ganz egal.
Der Laufer he vos leadin'
Hans Breitmann ash he goed,
Boot he tidn't see a soplin'
Dot vos lyin' in de road.
Id yank dem out like marples,
Mitout a will or shall;
Hets downvarts in a shnow-pank,
Vent Laufer mit his gal.
Und ash Breitmann comed oonto it
Id kit indo his vay,
Und tossed him mit his madchen
Right indo Laufer's shleigh;
Hans crab de reins like blitze',
Und go ahet like sin:
"Adje, mein lieber Fritze!
Dis dimes I scoop you in!"
He vly avay like shvallows
To vhere a davern lay,
Vhere de opple-tod vos ploomin'
Among de Deutschers gay.
Der Breitmann as he vonisht
Yoost cast von look pehind,
At de lecks of Fritz - und Mina-
A-vafin in de wind.
IT was stiller, dimmer twilight - amber toornin' into gold,
All lofely, yet neclected - like an oldt und silent song.
Out shpoke der Ritter Breitmann, "Ven I hafe not forgot,
Ich kenn an anciendt shtory of dis inderesdin shpot,
Of the Deutscher Middleolter vot de Minnesingers sung,
Ven dot olt ruine oben vas a-bloomin, fair, und yung.
"Vonce dere lifed a noble fraulein - fery peautiful vas she,
More ash twendy dimes goot lookin - it is in de historie;
Might beholdt mitout a discount she vas of de upper ten.
"But dough lofely as an angel, mit eyes of turkos plue,
She vas cruel ash a teufel, und de vorst man efer knew.
Vonce ven a nople young one kneeled down to her mit lofe,
She kicket him mit her slipper und oopset him on de shtove.
"Und said, 'I do refuse you, as you may plainly see;
Und from dis day henseforvart mine refuse you shall pe,
Und when I do run afder you like dogs run afder men,
Den I vill pe your vife, yung man - boot keep avay dill denn!'
"He lishten to her crimly, and no single vort he said,
Boot de bitter dings she spoken poot der teufel in his head;
"Vonce, at de end of autoom, ven de vind vos bitter cold,
Dis maiden out a-ridin' met a voman poor and old;
Her feets vere bare and pleedin', and she said, 'Ah! ton't refuse
"De lady boorst out laughin', 'Fool here, or fool me dere,
You give to me a couple, I gives to you a pair.'
Denn she rode avay a-laughin'; de old voman says 'I wete,
I'll give you shoes, my lady, dot vill fit your soul and feet!'
"Dis voman vas a vitche, an bitter one dere to,
All dot vot she had shpoken she light enough could do;
De Ritter did not know it, but he told her of his love,
And how dot shkornful lady hat oopset him mit de shtove.
"Out spoke de grimme witche, 'She shall pay dee well to boot,
If yo pring to me de measure of dat lady's liddle foot.'
He got it from her shoemaker, and gafe id to de vitch,
Denn she gafe it to de damsel pooty soon as hot as pitch.
"Von morn de lofely lady, on openin' her toor,
Found de nicest pair of gaiter boots she efer saw pefore;
Dey vitted her exoctly - mitouten any doubt-
Boot, mein Gott! how she vas shrocken ven dey 'gun to valk apout!
"Und ash de poots go valkin', like de buds go mit de stem,
It vollowed dot de lady had to valk apout in dem.
Dey took her out into de street - dey run her on de road,
Bym-by she saw a man ahead vot led her vhere she goed.
"Vhen he vent valkin' longsome denn longsome vas her pace,
Vhen he roon like a greyhound she skompered in a race;
He led her o'er de moundains und cross de lonely plain,
Until de evenin' shadows, ven he took her home again.
"Denn she dink mit hate and fury of dis man she used to skoff,
Und den go at de gaiters - boot she couldn't pull dem off,
She vork mit all de servants, boot 'tvasent any use,
Und so she hafe to go to bett - a-shleepin' in her shoes.
"Next mornin' off dey shtarted, apout de broke of day,
Den he led her to a castle in de woods and far away,
And shpeak to her, 'My lady - I dink at last you see
Dat de dime has come in earnesdt vhen you've cot to vollow me!'
"Oh vat ish female nature?  Oh vat ish mortal pride?
How all dot shtands de firmest most quickly shlips aside
De cloudts dot o'er de moundains look shkornful at de plain,
Ere long mit shtormy wetter come toomble down in rain.
"So de storm-cloud of Superbia vhich shweep her soul above,
Vas meltet mit his shternness and be-turned into love,
As his words like donner wetter croshed ven de lightnin' flies,
So downward coom de torrents of dear trops from her eyes.
"Und she gry, 'Mit shame I own it, to say de fery least,
I gonfess dat in dis matter I hafe acted like a peast;
Ven I made of you my refuse, I dinked it no account,
But now de pack is on my back it seems a big amount.
"'But if you vish to ved me, I vill do vat you require.
He answered, 'Now you're talkin' - dot is yoost vot I tesire,
For I am very willin', and you do not refuse,
Boot remember vot you bromised - send de vitch a pair of shoes!'
"She answered, 'I vill follow verever you may go,
All ofer hills and falleys, in sunshine, rain, or schnow,
All over in der Welt, dear, I'll vander on vith thee,
I do not care how rough de road or dark de path may be!
"'Or in de bloomin' meadows, vhere de grass is soft and sweet,
Or in de rocky passes, vhere de stones are under veet,
Or if I vear de shoes, love, vitch you hafe given me,
Or if I moost go barefoot, is all de same to me.'
"He drew away de gaiters.  She said, 'As I'm rich
I vill fill dem both mit money, and take dem to de vitch.'
Ja wohl, she saw die Hexe, and takin' her aside,
She danked her for de lesson vot hat dook avay her pride.
"On de vay vhen dey vere married, how vere dey all erstaun
To see a lofely lady come in mit golden crown,
All in a rosy-silken dress vot shined as pright as glass,
Said, 'My dears, I am de vitch dot fetch dis ding to pass.
"'You know I look so ogly vonce, und now am peautiful,
Dot ist de vay dot all dings vork ven folks pe dutiful.
Ash de lily toorns to vhitey vot once vas dirty green,
So all ist fair ven virdue ist runnin' de machine.'"
Dis is de vondrous shtory vot de Ritter Breitmann told
Besides the rooshin' Danube of de schloss so grey und old,
Vhile a shmokin' of his meerschaum; und till all time pe gone
The rustlin' of de vasser tells de tale for ever on.
Dat is an alt legende, und yet 'tis efer new,
Und to efery von dot hears it it fits yoost like a shoe.
Und dis de shinin' moral dot in de oyster lies-
Some day you may roon after de dings you vonce despise!
THIS Glossary was prepared entirely by Mr. NICHOLAS TRUBNER.  I
am not aware that he had any assistance in writing it.  I mention
familiar with obscure and obsolete old German facetious
literature (as the text indicates), and at the same time with
Americanisms.  I should say that in all of the later ballads, or
at least in fully one half of all in the book, the author was
indebted to him for ideas, suggestions, and emendations, and that
translation from Scheffel's poems indicates.  A very few words
have been added to explain the poems in the ballads which appear
for the first time in this edition.
Abenddammerung,(Ger.) - Evening dim light; twilight.
Abendgold,(Ger.) - Evening gold.
Abendroth,(Ger.) - Evening red.
Abendsonnenschein,(Ger.) - Evening sunshine.
Abbordez-moi vodre mere,(German-French) - Bring me your mayor.
Allatag,(Ger. dial.) - Every day.
Alla weil - All the while; always.
Allegader - All together.
Alles wird ewig zu eins,(Ger.) - And all for ever becomes one.
Alter Schwed',(old Swede) - A familiar phrase like "old fellow."
Annerthalb Yar, Anderthalb Jahr,(Ger.) - Year and a half.
Apple-tod,(Amer.) - Apple toddy.  Spirit distilled from cider.
Arbeiterhalle - Working-man's hall.
Arminius,(Herman.) - The Duke of the Cheruskans, and destroyer of
Arriere pensee,(Fr.) - A reserved thought or intention.
Aufgespannt,(Ger.) - Stretched, bent.
Augenblick,(Ger.) - Twinkling of an eye.
Baender-box - Band-box.
Baldface corn,(Amer.) - Plain maize whisky.
Barell-hell pars - Parallel-bars; a part of the gymnastic
apparatus.
Be-ghostet,(Ger. Begeistert) - Inspired.
Bei Leib und Leben,(Ger.) - By my body and soul.
Bellin,(Ger. Bellen) - To bark.
Be-mark,(Ger. Bemarken) - Observe.
Bemerkbar,(Ger.) - Observable.  Should be noticed.
Bemoost,(Ger.) - Mossgrown, in student's language, ein bemoostes
Haupt, an old student.
Bender,(Amer.) - A spree; a frolic.  To "go on a bender" -
to go on a spree.
Be-raised - Raised, with the augment, literal for Ger. erhoben.
Bestimmung des Menschen - Vocation of Man, title of one
of Fichte's works.
Bewises,(Ger. Beweist, from Beweisen) - Proves.
Birra gazzosa,(Italian) - Aerated, gaseous beer.
Bix Buchse,(box) - Rifle.  Bess in Brown Bess is the equivalent
of the German Buchse, (Brown being merely an alliterative
epithet;) French, buse tube; Flemish, buis.  (Still
found in blunderbuss, arquebuss.)  See Blackley's "Word Gossip."
Bock - A strong kind of German beer.
Bole Jack road - Near Murfreesboro, Tennessee.
Bornirtheit - Limitedness of capacity.
Bountiee,(Amer.) - Bounty-money paid during the war as a premium
to soldiers.  To jump the bounty, was to secure the premium and
then run away.
"This is the song of Billy Jones,
Who jumped the boun-ti-ee."
Bowery - A street at New York, inhabited principally by Germans.
Brandy smash,(Amer.) - A plain half-glass mint julep of only
sugar,ice, spirits, and mint.  A regular julep is larger, and
contains more ingredients.
Bring it down to dots - Reduce it to figures.
Broosh-pinder - Brushbinder,(Ger. Buerstenbinder.) -
Brushmaker. The brushmakers are supposed, probably on account
of their throat-parching business, to be always thirsty.
Brummed - growled - (Ger. Brummen).
Bugs - In America all insects, especially Coleoptera.
Bummer,(Amer.) - A fellow haunting low taverns; applied during
the late civil war in the United States to hangers-on of the
army.  Probably a corruption of the German bummler(loafer).
Bust his shell - Broke his head.
Butterbrod,(Ger.) - Buttered bread.
By-Nearly; Beinahe - Almost, nearly.
Camine - Chimney-piece.
Canyon,(Span. Canon) - A narrow passage between high and
precipitous banks, formed by mountains or tablelands, often
with a river running beneath.  These occur in the great Western
prairies, New Mexico, and California.
Carmagnole - A wild street dance.
Carmosine,(Ger.) - Crimson.  French, cramoisoi.
Change their lodge - Shift from one "society" to another.
Chroc, Chrocus, Crocus - An Alemannic leader, who overran Gaul,
according to Gregory of Tours.
Cinder - Suende; sin.
Clam - The popular name of a bivalvular shell-fish, the Venus.
Colle belle,(Ital.) - With the beauties.
Conradin - The last of the imperial house of the Hohenstaufen -
beheaded at Naples in 1268.
Coot - (To cut) a dash, (to come out a "swell,")
to dress extravagantly.
Corned,(Amer.) - Made drunk.
Coster - The inventor of the art of printing, according
Crecian pend - When Breitmann says "Dat pend of the bow ish
the Crecian pend," it is a rather eqivocal compliment.
"Grecian bend" has lately become a common newspaper
expression.  Smuggling done by women is called a "Case of
Grecian bend."  The present style of skirt, full at the back,
is favourable to it.
Crislies - Grisly,(bear.)
Da ist er! Schau! - There he is! look!
Deck - A pack of cards, piled one upon another.
Demperanceler, Temperenzler - Temperance man.
Dessauerinn - A woman from Dessau.
Die Hexe - The witch.
Die wile as mohte leben - During all its life.
Daz wolde er immer dienen
Die wile es mohte leben.
- Kutrun. XV. Aventiure, 756th verse.
Dink - he, they think; my dinks - my thoughts.
Dinked - he, they thought.
Dishtriputet - Instead of attributed.
Dissolfed - Instead of resolved.
D'lusion - Instead of allusion.
Donnerwetter,(Ger.) - Thunder and lightning.
Doonderblix - Thunder and lightning.
Dorn - A thorn.  Dorn lieder - Thorn-songs.
Drawed he in - (literal rendering of the German Zog er ein,)
Dreimal,(Ger.) - Three times.
Drocks - Drakes, dragons; (Ger. Drachen.)
Druckerei - Printing-office.
Dummehrlichkeit,(Ger.) - Honest simplicity.
Earnsthaft, ernsthaft - Serious.
Eberschwein,(Ger.) - Wild boar.
Eckhartshausen - A German supernaturalist.
Eher,(Ger.) - Sooner.  In the dialect it has the meaning
Einander to sprechen mit,(Ger.) - To speak together.
Eins, zwei, drei - One, two, three.
Einsichen, to take up one's abode with.
Emerich - King Emerich, hero of a German legend.
Emsig Gruebler,(Ger.) - Assiduous inquirer.
Englandrinn,(Ger.) - English woman.
Error-dom, Irrthum - Error.
Erstaun, Erstaunished, erstaunt - Astonished.
Erwaitin',(Ger. Erwartend) - Awaiting, expecting.
Euchred - From Euchre, the game of cards.
Fackeltantz,(Ger.) - Torch dance.
Fancy craps or crabs - Fast horses.
Fat - Printer's term.
Feldwebel,(Ger.) - A sergeant.
Feinslieb,(Ger.) - Fair or fine love.
Fenster - A window.
Fichte - A German philosopher.
Finster,(Ger.) - Dark, dismal.
Foll - To fall.
Fore-by - Literal translation of the German Vorbei.
Fore-lying - Literal translation of Vorliegend.
Foresetzen - To set, put (lay) before an audience.
Frank-tiroir - Franc-tireur.
Francois Villon - An old French humorous poet, whom Boileau
speaks of as the first who began to write truly modern French.
Freischarlinger,(Ger. Freischaerler) - A member of a Free Corps;
especially applied to those who belonged to the Free Corps
formed in Southern Germany during the Revolution in 1848.
Freischuetz,(Ger.) - Free shot, one who shoots with charmed
bullets, the name of Karl Maria Von Weber's celebrated opera.
Friederich Rothbart - Frederic Barbarossa, the great Emperor of
Germany and one of the German legendary heroes.  He is supposed
to sleep in the Kyffhauser in Thuringia, and to awaken one day,
when he will bring great glory over Germany.
Frolic - Frohlich, merry.
Froze to de ready - Held fast to the money.
Fullenden - Vollenden - To complete, perfect.
Fust or Faust - The partner of Gutemberg, the inventor of the
art of printing.
Gambrinus - A mythical King of Brabant, supposed to have been
the inventor of beer.
Gans egal - Quite the same.
Ganz und gar,(Ger.) - Altogether, all over.
Gass und Strass,(Ger.) - Lane and street.
Gasbalgs - Bladder of gas.
Gaul dern - A Yankee oath.
Gauner-sprache,(Ger.) - Thieves' language.
Ge-bildet - Built, with the German augment.
Geborn - Born, with the augment.
Ge-brudert,(formed like ge-schwister,) - Brothers.
Geh hin mein Puch,(German of the 16th century).
Gehst nit mit rechten Dingen zu - Dost not do it by any natural
means; there is witchcraft in it.
Gekommene - Arrived(newly arrived).
Gekommen so,(Ger.) - Come thus.
Ge-kostet - Cost, with the German augment.)
Gesangverein,(Ger.) - Singing-society.
Ge-screech, Geschrei - Bawling, clamour.
Gesembled - Assembled, with the augment of the German preterite.
Geshmasht - Smashed, with German augment.
Gestohlen und bekannt,(Ger.) - Stolen, and known.
Gilt - In the ordinary sense, and also in the same verse, "gilt,"
something, and also guilt.
Glamour - Ocular deception by magic.
Glee-wine, Glueh-wein - Hot-spiced wine.
Goblum - For goblin.
Gott-full, gottvoll - Glorious, divine.
Gottsdonnerkreuzschockschwerenoth,(Ger.) - Another variety of big
Gott's-doonder,(Ger. Gott's donner) - God's thunder.  See also
Gott's tausend, a thundering sort of oath, but never preceded
by lightning, for it is only used as a kind of expletive to
express great surprise, or to give great emphasis to words
which, without it, would seem to be capable of none.
Gottstausend,(Ger.) - An abbreviation of Gott's tausend
donnerwetter (God's thousand thunders), and therefore the
comparative of Gott's doonder; with most of those who use it a
meaningless phrase.
Gott weiss,(Ger.) - God knows!
Go von - Go one, bet on him.
Grod, gerad - Straight.
Guestfriendlich, gastfreundlich - Hospitable.
Gummi lasticum - India rubber.
Gutemberg - The inventor of the art of printing.
Guve - Southern slang for give.  Guv, for give, is also
English slang as well as American.
Hand-shoe,(Ger. Handschuh) - Glove.
Hans Michel - A popular but not complimentary name for Germany.
Hans Wurst - Merry Andrew; Zani; Jack Pudding - the latter word
being a literal translation of the German Hans Wurst; the
pudding in either case referring to the sausages, or the
pretended sausage, which the Merry Andrew always appeared to
be swallowing by the yard or fathom.  See Blackley's "Word
Haul de pot - Take the stakes.
Hegel - Name of the German philosopher.
Heine, Heinrich - German poet.
Heller Glorie schein - Bright gloriole.
Hereauf, hierauf - Thereupon.
Herr Je,(Ger.) - An abbreviation of Herr Jesus (O
Lord!); generally only used by those who are fond of
meaningless exclamations.
Her-re-liche, herrliche - Superb, grand, noble.
Hertsen - Herzen; hearts.
Herzbruder,(Ger.) - Heart's brother.
Hexerei - Witchery, sorcery.
Himmlisch' hoellisch' qual,(Ger.) - Heavenly-hellish pain.
Hip Herje! - A common interjection.
Honey fooglin', Honeyfuggle - Is believed to be English
slang.  In America it means blarneying, deceiving.
Hoockle perry, persimmoned - "A huckle-berry over my
persimmon." Surpassed, out-done.
Hoof-irons,(Huf-eisen in Ger.) - Horse-shoe.
Hundsfott,(Ger. Vulg.) - Mean scoundrel, hound.
I Gili romaneskro - This song is written in the German gipsy
dialect.  Eh! in third line of second verse, is the
German word ehe, "ere," or before.  Kuribente
("in war,") is in the Slavonic and gipsy local case,
or as Pott calls it (Die Zigeuner in Europa und Asien)
Ik leven,(Flem.) - I live.
Il diavolo in carnato,(Ital.) - The devil incarnate or in
carnation.
In geburst - Burst.
In Sang und Klang dein Leben lang,(Ger.) - In music and song all
thy life long.
Ita dixit,(Latin) - So said.
Jeff - A game played by throwing up types, generally for
"refreshments."
Jungfernkranz,(Ger.) - Bridal garland.
Kanaster,(Ger.) - Canaster tobacco.
Kan ik.  Ik kan,(Flem.) - I can.
Kitin, a kitin - Flying or running rapidly.
Klein und gross - Small and great.
Knasterbart,(Ger.) - Literally, tobacco-beard; perhaps denoting a
Knock dem out de shpots - Knock the spots out of them; astonish
them.
Kreutzer - Frederick Creutzer, distinguished professor in the
University of Heidelberg, author of a great work on "Symbolik."
Kummel,(Ger.) - Cumin brandy.
Kummel, kimmel,(Ger.) - Schnapps, dram.  Hans, in his tipsy
enthusiasm, ejaculates, "Oh, mein Gott in Kimmel!" instead of
"im Himmel" (heaven), becoming guilty of an unconscious
alliteration, and confessing, according to the proverb in
vino veritas, where his God really abides; "whose God is
their belly."
into the American cities by the Germans, and now much in vogue
among all classes.
Lam - To drub, beat soundly.
Larmen - The French word larmes, tears, made into a German verb.
Laughen, lachen - Laughing.
Lavergne - A place between Nashville and Murfreesboro', in the
state of Tennessee.
Lebe hoch! - Hurrah!
Leben - Life; living.
Lebenlang,(Ger.) - Life-long.
Lev'st du nock? - Liv'st thou yet?
Libby - The notorious Confederate prison at Richmond, Va.
Liddle Pills - Little bills, Legislative enactments.
Liederkranz,(Ger.) - Glee-union.
Liederlich,(Ger.) - Loose, reckless, dissolute.
Loafer,(Amer.) - A term which, considered as the German
pronunciation of lover, is a close translation of
rom, since this latter means both a gipsy and a
husband.
Los, los gehen,(Ger.) - To go at a thing, at somebody.
Loosty,(Ger. Lustig) - Jolly, merry.
Loudet,(Lauten in Ger.) - To make sound.
Luftballon,(Ger.) - Air-balloon.
Lumpenglocke - An abusive term applied to bells, especially to
those which are rung to give notice that the beer-houses must
close.
Maedchen,(Ger.) - Girl, maiden.
Markgraefler - A pleasant light wine grown in the Grand Duchy
Marmorbild - Marble statue.
Maskenzug,(Ger.) - Procession of masked persons.
Massenversammlung,(Ger.) - Mass meeting.
Mein Freund - My friend.
Mein Sohn - My son.
Meine Seel',(Ger.) - By my soul.
Mijn lief gesellen,(Flem.) - My dear comrades.
Minnesinger - Poet of love.  A name given to German lyric poets,
who flourished from the twelfth to the fourteenth centuries.
Mit hoontin knife, &c.:-
"With her white hands so lovely,
She dug the Count his grave.
From her dark eyes sad weeping,
The holy water she gave."
Mohr, ein schwarzer,(Ger.) - A blackamoor.
Moleschott - Author of a celebrated work on physiology.
Morgan - John Morgan, a notorious Confederate guerilla during the
Morgen-het-ache - Morning headache.
labour-despising Southern gentry to the labouring classes as
the substratum of society.
Naturalizationisds - The officers, &c., who give the rights of
native citizens to foreigners.
Nibelungen Lied - The lay of the Nibelungen; the great German
national epos.
Nieuw Jarsie - New Jersey, in America, famous inter alia for its
sandy beaches and high surf.
Nirwana - The Brahminical absorption into God.
Nix cum raus - That I had not come out.
No sardine - Not a narrow-minded, small-hearted fellow.
Norate - To speak in an oration.
Nun endlich,(Ger.) - Now at last.
O'Brady - An Irish giant.
Ochsen,(Ger.) - Oxen; stupid fellows.  As a verb it also is used
familiarly to mean hard study.
Odenwald - A thickly-wooded district in South Germany.
Oltra tramontane; ultra tramontane - Applied to the non-Italian
Catholic party.
On-belongs - Literal translation of Zugehort.
On de snap - All at once.
On-did to on-do - Literal translation of the German
anthun; to donn, to put on.
Oonshpeakbarly,(Ger. unaussprechbarlich) - Inexpressibly.
Oop-gecleared,(Ger. Aufgeklaert) - Enlightened.
Oopright-hood,(Ger. Aufrichtigkeit) - Uprightness.
Oop-sproong - For aufsprung.
Opple-yack - Apple-jack.  Spirit distilled from cider.
Orgel-ton,(Ger.) - Organ sound.
Out-ge-poke-te - Out-poked.
Out-signed,(Ger. ausgezeichnete) - Distinguished, signal.
Out-sprach - Outspoke.
Over again - Uebrigen.
Peke - Belgian rye whisky.
Peeps - People.  "Hard on the American peeps" - a phrase for
anything exacting or severely pressing.
Pelznickel, Nick, Nickel - St. Nicolas, muffled in fur, is one of
George and St. Martin, he oftener rides a donkey than a horse,
more especially in that part of the German land which can boast
of having given birth to the illustrious Hans.  St. Nicolas is
supposed, on the night preceding his name-day, the sixth of
December, to pass over the house-tops on his long-eared steed,
and having baskets suspended on either side filled with sweets
and playthings, and to drop down through the chimneys presents
for those children who have been good during the year, but
birch-rods for those who have been naughty, would not go to bed
early, or objected to being washed, &c.  In the expectation of
his coming, the children put, on the eve of St. Nicolas' day,
either a shoe, or a stocking, or a little basket, into the
chimney-piece of their parents' bedroom.  We may remark, by the
way, that St. Nicolas is the Christian successor of the heathen
Nikudr, of ancient German mythology.
Pesser, besser,(Ger.) - Better.
Pestain - Stain, with the augment.
Pfaelzer - A man from the Rhenish Palatinate.
Pig-sticker - Bowie-knife.
Pile-out,(Amer.) - Hurry out.
"Plain" - Water plain, i.e., unmixed.
Plue goats - Blue coats, soldiers.
Plug-muss - Fight for a fire-plug.  American fireman's language.
Poker - A favourite game of cards among Western gamblers.
Pop-slets - Bob-sleds.  A very rough kind of sledge.
Potzblitz,(Ger.) - int., The deuce.
Potztausend!  Was ist das? - Zounds!  What is that?
Poussiren - To court.
Pretzel,(Ger.) - A kind of fancy bread, twist or the like.
Prezackly - Pre(cisely), exactly.
Protocollirt, protocolliren - To register, record.
Pully, i.e., Bully - An Americanism, adjective.  Fine,
capital.  A slang word, used in the same manner as the
English used the word crack; as, "a bully
horse," "a bully picture."
imitate.
Pye - To buy.
Rapp(Rappe) - A black horse.
Raushlin', rauschend - Rustling.
Reb - An abbreviation of rebel.
Red cock - Or make de red cock crow.  Einem den rothen
Hahn aufs Dach setzen.  A German proverb signifying to set
fire to a house.
Red-Waelsch, Roth-Waelsch,(Ger.) - Thieves' language.
Reiten gaen,(Flemish) - Go riding.
Rheingraf,(Ger.) - Count of the Rhine districts.
Rheinweinbechers Klang - The Rhine wine goblet's sound.
Richter,(Jean Paul Fr.) - A distinguished German author.
Ring - A political clique or cabal.
Roland - One of the paladins of Charlemagne.
Rollin' locks - Rolling logs, mutually aiding (used only in
politics.)
Rouse,(Ger. Heraus) - Out; come out.
Sagen Cyclus - Cycle of legends.
Sass, Sassy, Sassin' - Sauce, saucy, &c.
Schenk aus,(Ger.) - Pour out.
Schenket ein,(Ger.) - Pour in (fill the glasses).
Schimmel,(Ger.) - Grey horse.
Schlesierwein,(Ger.) - Wine grown in Silesia, proverbially sour.
Schlog him ober de kop - Knocked him on the head.
Schnitz - Pennsylvania German word for cut and dried fruit.
Schnitz, schnitzen,(Ger.) - To chop, chip, snip.
Schonheitsideal,(Ger.) - The ideal of beauty.
Schopenhauer - A celebrated German "philosophical physiologist."
Schoppen,(Ger.) - A liquid measure, chopin, pint.
Schweinblatt - (Swine) Dirty paper.
Schweitzer kase,(Ger.) - Swiss cheese.
Schwig, Swig, verb. - To drink by large draughts.
Schwigs, Swig, n. - A large draught.
Scoop - Take in, get.
Scrouged,(Amer.) - Pressed, jammed.
Seelen-Ideal - Soul's ideal.
Sefen-lefen - Seven or eleven(minutes).
Selbstanschauungsvermogen,(Ger.) - Capacity for self-inspection.
Serenity - A transparency.
Shanty - A board cabin.  Slang, for house.
Shapel - Chapel is an old word for a printing-office.
Shings - Jingo; by jingo.
Shpicket - Spigot; a pin or peg to stop a small hole in a cask of
Shlide - Slide.  "Let it slide," vulgar for "let it go."
Shlished, geschlitzt - Slit.
Shlop over - Go too far and upset or spill.  Applied to men who
venture too far in a success.
Shmysed,(Ger. Schmissen, from Schmeissen) -
Threw him out of doors.
Shnow-wice,(Ger. Schnee-weis) - Snow-white.
Shooting-stick - A shooting-stick is used for closing up the form
Show-spiel, Schauspiel - Play, piece.
Shpoons - Spoons, plunder.
Shtuhl,(Ger. Stuhl) - Stool, chair.
Six mals - Six times.
Skeeted - Went fast, skated(?)
make disappear.  Thus, a deserter "skyugled," and sometimes he
"skyugled" a coat or watch.
Slanganderin' - Foolishly slandering.
Slasher gaffs - Spurs for cocks, with cutting edges.
Slibovitz - A Bohemian schnapps.
Slumgoozlin' - Slum or sham guzzling, humbug.
Slumgullion - A Mississippi term for a legislator.
So mit,(Ger.) - Thus with.
Soplin - A sapling, young tree.
Sound upon the goose - Bartlett, in his Dictionary of
Americanisms, states that this phrase originated in the
Kansas troubles, and signified true to the cause
of slavery.  But this is erroneous, as the phrase
was common during the native American campaign,
and originated at Harrisburg, as described by Mr. Leland.
Souse und Brouse,(Ger. Saus und Braus) - Revelry and rioting.
Sports - Sporting men.
Stone fence,(Amer.) - Rye whisky.
"I went in and got a horn
Of old stone fence."
Stracks - Straight ahead, or onwards.
Straight flush - In poker, all the cards of one suit.
Strauss - Name of the celebrated Viennese valse player and
composer.
Stunden,(Ger.) - Leagues.  About four and a half English miles.
literature.
Sweynheim and Pannartz - The first printers at Rome.
Takes - Allotments of copy to each printer.
Tantzen,(Ger.) - To dance.
Taugenix, Taugenichts - Good-for-nothing fellow.
Teufelsjagersmann - Devil's huntsman.
Thusnelda - The wife of Arminius,(Hermann,) the Duke of the
Cheruskans and conqueror of Varus.
Tie a dog loose. Losbinden
Tiger - An American term for a gambling table.
Tixey - "I wish I was in Dixie."  The origin of this song
is rather curious.  Although now thoroughly adopted as a
Southern song, and "Dixie's Land" understood to mean the
Southern States of America, it was, about a century ago,
the estate of one Dixie, on Manhattan Island, who treated
his slaves well; and it was their lament, on being deported
south, that is now known as "I wish I was in Dixie."
To House,(Ger. zu Hause) - At home.
Tortled - To tortle, to move off.  From turtle.
Touch the dirt - Touch the road.
Treu,(Ger.) - Faithful, true.
Throw him with ecks - Pelt him with eggs.
Turchin - Colonel Turchin's men ravaged the town of Huntsville
(Ala.) during the civil war.
Tyfelfest - From Teufel, here in the sense of "best" or "worst."
Tyfel-shnake, Teufelsschnaken - Devilries.
Tyfel-strikes, Teufels-streiche - Devil-strokes.
Uber Stein and Schwein,(Ger.) - Over stone and swine.
Ueberschwengliche,(Ger.) - Transcendental, elevated.
Uhr,(Ger.) - Clock, watch, hour, time.  Used for "hour" in the
ballad.
Uliverus - Oliver, another of the twelve Paladins of Charlemagne,
Und lauter guter Ding,(Ger.) - And of thoroughly good cheer.
Un-windoong,(Ger. Entwicklung?) - Unravelling.
Unvolkommene technik - Unfinished style or method.
Urbummeleid,(Ger. vulg.) - Arch-loafer's song.
Urlied,(Ger.) - The song of yore.
Dutch ducats; or "Magna molimur parvi.")
Varus - The Roman commander in Germany, conquered by Arminius.
Vercieren,(Flem.) - Adorn; exalt.
Versteh, Verstehen,(Ger.) - To understand.
Vertyfeln, Verteufeln - To botch.
Villiam - William Street at New York, inhabited by many Germans.
Vivat! - The same as vive! in French.  Hurrah!
Voonderly,(Ger. Wunderlich) - Wondrous, curious.
Wachsen,(Ger.) - To grow.
"Komm'ich in's galante Sachsen
Wo die schone Maedchen wachsen."
Wahlverwandtschaft,(Ger.) - Elective affinity, sympathy of souls.
Waidmannsheil,(Ger.) - Huntsman's weal.
Walschen,(Ger.) - Of the Latin race.
Wappenshield(Waffenschild) - Coat of arms.
Ward all zu Steine,(Ger.) - Became all stone.
Ward zu Wind,(Ger.) - Became a wind.
Wechselbalg,(Ger.) - (formerly a popular superstitious belief), a
Weihnachtsbaum,(Ger.) - Christmas tree.
Weihnachtslied,(Ger.) - Christmas song.
Weingarts, weingarten,(Ger.) - Vineyards.
Weingeist,(Ger.) - Vinous, ardent spirit.
Wein-handle,(Ger. Weinhandel or Weinhandlung) -
Wine-trade, wine-shop.
Weinnachtstraum - Lit. Winenight's dream, for "Weihnacht,"
Christmas dream.
Wellen und Wogen,(Ger.) - Waves and billows.
Welshhen - Turkey hen.
Werden, das Werden - The becoming to be.
We'uns, you'ns - We and you.  A common vulgarism
through the Southern States.
"'Tis sad that we'uns from you'ns parts
When you'ns hev stolen we'uns' hearts.
Wie gehts,(Ger.) - How goes it? How are you?
Wie Milch und Blut - Like milk and blood.
Wild und Weh,(Ger.) - Wild and woebegone.
Wilde Jagd - Wild hunt.
Windsbraut,(Ger. poet) - Storm, hurricane, gust of wind.
Wise-hood,(Ger. Weisheit) - Wisdom.
Wised,(Ger. Wusste, from wissen) - Knew.
Wo bist du?(Ger.) - Where art?
Woe-moody,(Ger. Wehmuthig) - Moanful, doleful.
Wohlauf,(Ger.) - Well, come on, cheer up.
Wolfsschlucht,(Ger.) - Wolf's glen.
Word-blay - Word-play, pun, quibble.
Wunderscheen(Wunderschoen) - Very beautiful.
Wurst - A German student word for indifference.
Yartausend, Jahrtausend - A thousand years.
Yellow pine - Mulatto.
Yonge maegden,(Flem.) - Young girls.
"I lost a maiden in that hour." - Byron.
Yoompers - Jumpers.  Rude sledges.
Zapfet aus,(Ger.) - Tap the barrel.
Zukunftig,(Ger.) - In future.
designation.
Lebet halt auf auf eig'ner Weis'
Hungrig hier und hungrig dort,
This, with the other verses, may be found in the German Student's
shown in the fact that an American German editor, in his
ignorance of English, actually believed that the word stinging,
as here given, meant stinking, and was accordingly
indignant.  It is needless to say that no such idea was intended
to be conveyed.
Thy arms are ivory bone,
Thy body is all satin soft,
Thy breast of marble stone
Smooth, tender, pure, and fair.
Schone Wittwe." It appeared about 1856, and "went the round
of the papers," accumulating as it went several additions
or rejoinders, one of which was that by Hans Breitmann.
The handsome widow's face;
I saw her last night standing
By her counter, full of grace.
With cheeks as pure as milk and blood,
With eyes so bright and blue,
I kissed her full well six times,
Indeed, and that is true.
Wackernagel's Lesebuch and Das klein Heldenbuch.
"Ich vill zum Land ausreiten,
Sprach sich Maister Hilteprand."
century, in German drinking songs. "Gling, glang, glorian, Die
Sau hat ein Panzer an." - Tractatus de Ebrietate Vitanda.
"Wer . sein . Stiefel . nit . trinken . kan .
Der . ist . furwahr . kein . Teutscher . man."
There is an allusion to this boot-cup in Longfellow's "Golden
Legend," where mention is made of a jolly companion
At once a postilion's jack-boot full,
And ask with a laugh, when that was done,
If they could not give him the other one."
foreign and remote regions, "Is there any good fellow from
Boblingen here?"
occurs in Rabelais. G
jolly old friend after long absence - "Uns kommt der alte
to signify indiffer ence.  When a sausage is on the table, and
one is asked with mock courtesy which part he prefers, he
naturally replies - "Why, it is all sausage to me."  I have heard
all turkey."  There are, of course, divers ancient and
quaint puns in Pennsylvania, on such a word as wurst. Thus
it is said that a northern pedlar, in being served with some
sausage of an inferior quality, was asked again if he would have
some of the wurst.  Not understanding the word, and
construing it as a slight, he replied to his hostess - "No, thank
this line, which is borrowed from Scheffel's poem of Perkeo, is
"indifferent, and equal, to me."
spoke, about as intelligently and clearly as Herr Breitmann, of a
Oh Time! - how art thou long!
entitled "Three Thousand Miles in a Railroad Car," and also in
letters written by Mr. J. G. Hazzard for the New York
avoid trouble in making change.
or broad and crooked, &c.
state by means of bribery.  In Pennsylvania, as in many other
states, bills which have "nothing in them" - i.e. no money
- are rarely allowed to pass.
General Jackson in a letter spelt all correct "oll
korrekt," and this I believe to be the real origin of
the expression. - C.G.L.
are literally true.
further, and applied it to sardines, as "small fishes," all of an
from the light of day.  A man who has never travelled, and has
during all his life been packed tightly among those who were his
equals in ignorance and inexperience, is therefore a "sardine."
as having occurred to a well-known politician, who bore the
sobriquet of "With all due deference," from his habit of
beginning all his speeches with these words.
schvearin, boot ash inderesdin Norse or Sherman idioms.  Goot
many refiewers vot refiewsed to admire soosh derms in de earlier
editions ish politelich requestet to braise dem in future nodices
requisition, which Breitmann had heard during the War of
Emancipation.  I once heard this cant term used in a droll
manner, about the end of the war, by a little girl, six years
old, the daughter of a quarter-master.  She had "confiscated," or
clamorously demanding its return.  "I cannot let you have the
whip," said she gravely, "as I need it for military purposes; but
an order on the United States Government." - C. G. L.
in America, they use the Spanish word vamos to express
every person in every sense of the verb to go.  Pronounced
Which sail so smoothly on,
O no - they're cursed Frenchmen,
All in an air-balloon."
Unto the earth's firm surface,
der Herr Breitmann gehappenet to hafe von on." - FRITZ
I have thirty thousand men
Not far from here, parbleu!
But give me first champagne:
I've a wondrous thirst, you know-
About a dozen cart-loads;
And then I'll let you go."
We are ruined!"
'Tis all to me, you know."
Which I would not gladly see;
So follow all my counsels,
And take advice from me.
I have two thousand bottles,
The best"-
couplet.
fans and boxes.
God give a happy year!"
Or if love doth much more than wine."
And taken from the stem."
Yes - naught can better be
Naught is sweeter, though, than loving;
It tastes better than wine to me.
There's nothing like the maidens,
There's nothing like good beer,
And he who does not love them both
Can be no cavalier."
Sur ces temps primitifs le doux progres a lui,
Et chacque jour le Rhin vers Cologne charrie
De nombreux Farinas, tous 'seul, 'tous 'Jean Marie.'"
- Le Maout,"Le Parfumeur," cited by Eugene Rimmel
view, not only the American artist BIERSTADT, but also the great
city of Munich, specially famous for its manufacture of beer.
droll mixture of incidents or details.  It is derived from an
extraordinary story of twelve rats, with one (their king) in the
centre, which were found in a nest with their tails grown
together, firmly as the ligament which connects the Siamese
matches, and one still used by many people.
signifying a low, worthless fellow.
song, "Viginti Jesuiti nuper convenere."
Rhenish wine." "If I could see a glass of whisky," said an
American, "I'd throw myself outside of it mighty quick."  Since
writing the above, I have seen the expression thus given in a
copy of La Belle Sauvage. - Bill of the Play, London, June 27,
"Nay these natives - simple creatures-
Had resolved that for the future
Each his own canoe would paddle,
Each his own hoe-cake would gobble,
And get outside his own whisky."
during a past winter.  It was as follows:- "Perche Eva mangio il
pomo Iddio per riscattarci si fece uomo, Ed ora il Nono Pio Per
mantenerci schiavi, si fa Dio."
many of these ballads were addressed in letters.
lines following it.
Bear what thy fate may be!
They may bite thee, they may tear thee,
So they do no harm to me!"
And whet your sword beside,
We have been lazy long enough,
The road is worth the ride."
quarter, is known as the Rhine.
No matter what befall;
In winter-time he finds them gone
And gets no rose at all.
Our petting and caressing here,
Our joy or misery
It all shall rest sub rosa, love,
And our own secret be!