human
I say, old fellow, said Jean Ficelle, scrutinizing Laboussole,
gpt
Yes, replied Laboussole, drawing himself up in his beaver coat.
human
I'm in a very pretty line of business now. I have a position in an enterprise that is just being started; I have an idea that I'm going to make my fortune.
gpt
The devil! there's nothing cheap about you!
human
What sort of a business is it?
gpt
It's something new and ingenious, my friends; imagine, if you please, that a party of capitalists have conceived the idea of forming a company to insure against fleas and all insects that devour mankind; for, as you probably know, mankind is being decimated by insects, and, if we don't look out, the world will come to an end that way. Now, then, the company has a capital stock of a million. With a million francs, you see, it would beat the devil if they couldn't wipe out all the fleas in Europe. It's a magnificent chance; the shares are going up, up at a frightful rate!
human
Oh! I say! that's a funny kind of insurance!
gpt
Messieurs, everything is insured nowadays: life, fortune, women--yes, messieurs, a company's being formed to guarantee the fidelity of your wives and mistresses! There won't be any more cuckolds, messieurs. Think what a vast enterprise! and what an age--that will have seen it! But they haven't succeeded yet in raising money enough to start the thing; they need a lot of money, so it seems. Speaking of mistresses, what's become of your sweetheart Bastringuette? I don't see her with you, my dear Sans-Cravate; has she got the smallpox?
human
Oh! I haven't seen anything of her for a long time, replied Sans-Cravate, with a frown;
gpt
Oho! did she do--what I mentioned just now?
human
Apparently.
gpt
Come, come! let's not talk about Bastringuette, cried Jean Ficelle.
human
You see, Laboussole, that it puts my comrade out of sorts.
gpt
Oh! excuse me, my boys, excuse me! I was thoughtless; it was my friendship for you that misled me. Let's have a drink!
human
What's your position in the flea business, eh?
gpt
A very fine one--I am an inspector. We send clerks ahead to attend to destroying the insects; then I arrive at the house of the insured, I inspect the premises, I search everywhere; and after my visit, I defy you to find anything there at all.
human
Are you required to have a moustache in your position, that you let yours grow?
gpt
It isn't absolutely required, but in all the best places moustaches are worn, and I felt that I owed that to myself. Your health, my bucks! To my pleasure at being in the bosom of my friends once more!