human
Have I the honor of speaking to Monsieur Tobie Pigeonnier?
gpt
Why, it's Monsieur Plays! Delighted to meet you! How's your health, Monsieur Plays?
human
Very good, thanks; but I am suffering a good deal with my corns. My boots hurt me. Have you any?
gpt
Boots?
human
No, corns.
gpt
That species of discomfort is entirely unknown to me.
human
Ah! you are very lucky!
gpt
My dear Monsieur Pigeonnier, I must tell you that my wife has sent me to you, because she thinks you--you made sport of her when you told her that you had killed Monsieur Albert Vermoncey in a duel. Women take offence at trifles, you know; and Herminie is very sensitive. You gave her a cigar, too. In short, she's furious with you. So far as I am concerned, I am sure that you had no intention to be disrespectful to her, but she insists that I shall demand satisfaction. It's perfect nonsense; we must arrange it somehow----
human
Your excellent wife is right, perfectly right, and I am not surprised that she has told you to kill me. Indeed, I agree with her.
gpt
What! you--you want--to fight?
human
Hush, and listen to me! I tell you again that I should deserve all her anger and yours, if I had acted as she thinks. But it is not so; and now she is only too thoroughly revenged on poor Albert! In our first affair, I thought I had killed him, but I was mistaken. Later, I had my revenge. When I learned of Albert's return to Paris, a month ago, I instantly sent him a challenge by a messenger, and he accepted it. Ah! he was a man of the nicest honor. We fought with pistols, near Pantin. I wounded Albert in the side, and he breathed his last the same day. Tell me, monsieur, if your good wife has any reason now to complain of me, when I have fought twice for her, when to avenge her I have killed one of my most intimate friends?
gpt
You are a brave fellow! said Monsieur Plays, shaking Tobie's hand;
human
I never doubted it. So poor Albert is really dead this time?
gpt
Yes, unfortunately; for I will confess to you that it grieves me deeply.
human
I believe it, oh! I believe it. Adieu, Monsieur Pigeonnier! It is my turn now to apologize to you.
gpt
Your obedient servant, Monsieur Plays!