human
Well, once there was a little girl, about eight years old. I shall call her Polly, but you need not feel obliged to follow my example. If you prefer to call her Kamschatka, I don't mind in the least. This little girl lived with her father and mother, in a little red cottage which stood quite by itself near a thick wood. Every day her parents went to the village, which was a mile or more away, to work, and they left little Polly in charge of the house, for she was a good and quiet little girl, and never was lonely or sad. One day Polly was sitting by the window, knitting, when she saw a queer-looking old woman coming along the road; such a queer old woman. Have you ever seen a picture of Cinderella's fairy godmother? well, she looked just like that, pointed hat, red cloak, and all. When the old woman saw Polly, she stopped, and looked earnestly at her; then she hobbled slowly up to the door and knocked. Polly ran and opened the door. How are you, my child?
gpt
let me in. I'm your grandmother.
human
excuse me, ma'am, but I don't think you can be my grandmother.
gpt
That shows how much you know about it!
human
how old are you?
gpt
Eight years old,
human
Very well!
gpt
now I am ninety-six years old, just twelve times as old as you are; therefore, I'm your grandmother.
human
But I don't see----
gpt
Oh, if you want to argue about it,
human
here we are,
gpt
Take a little girl eight years old, and multiply her by twelve; what will be the result? Answer: her grandmother. There!
human
what do you think of that?
gpt
_Is_ that Colburn's Arithmetic, ma'am?
human
Colburn's Fiddlestick!
gpt
Here's another for you. Put a boy up an apple-tree, and divide him by a good sized bull-dog; what will remain? hey?
human
I'm sure I don't know,
gpt
Mince-meat, of course,
human
You don't know much, evidently.
gpt
What a dreadful looking cat!
human
Hobble-gobble!