human
I am so glad you have been able to come, said Benjamin.
gpt
I have a most shocking disclosure to make to you. I am afraid that--but I hardly know how to say it--that--I really must break it off.
human
Break what off?
gpt
Our engagement.
human
Nonsense. I have been fitted for my trousseau.
gpt
Your what?
human
My wedding-dresses.
gpt
Oh, I beg pardon. I did not understand your French pronunciation. I thought--but it does not matter what I thought.
human
Pray what is the sense of this?
gpt
Philippa, my affection for you is unabated. Do not suppose that I love you one whit the less. But I am oppressed by a horrible nightmare--daymare as well. I am haunted.
human
Haunted, indeed!
gpt
Yes; by my late wife. She allows me no peace. She has made up her mind that I shall not marry you.
human
Oh! Is that all? I am haunted also.
gpt
Surely not?
human
It is a fact.
gpt
Hush, hush!
human
We are disturbing the audience, whispered Mr. Woolfield.
gpt
Let us go out into the passage and promenade there, and then we can talk freely.
human
Look here, Philippa, said he, offering the girl his arm, which she took,
gpt
Defy her.
human
I cannot.
gpt
Tut! these ghosts are exacting. Give them an inch and they take an ell. They are like old servants; if you yield to them they tyrannise over you.
human
But how do you know, Philippa, dearest?
gpt
Because, as I said, I also am haunted.
human
That only makes the matter more hopeless.
gpt
On the contrary, it only shows how well suited we are to each other. We are in one box.
human
Philippa, it is a dreadful thing. When my wife was dying she told me she was going to a better world, and that we should never meet again. _And she has not kept her word._
gpt
Rag her with it.
human
How can I?
gpt
You can do it perfectly. Ask her why she is left out in the cold. Give her a piece of your mind. Make it unpleasant for her. I give Jehu no good time.
human
Who is Jehu?
gpt
Jehu Post is the ghost who haunts me. When in the flesh he was a great admirer of mine, and in his cumbrous way tried to court me; but I never liked him, and gave him no encouragement. I snubbed him unmercifully, but he was one of those self-satisfied, self-assured creatures incapable of taking a snubbing. He was a Plymouth Brother.
human
My wife was a Plymouth Sister.
gpt
I know she was, and I always felt for you. It was so sad. Well, to go on with my story. In a frivolous mood Jehu took to a bicycle, and the very first time he scorched he was thrown, and so injured his back that he died in a week. Before he departed he entreated that I would see him; so I could not be nasty, and I went. And he told me then that he was about to be wrapped in glory. I asked him if this were so certain. 'Cocksure' was his reply; and they were his last words. And _he has not kept his word_.
human
And he haunts you now?
gpt
Yes. He dangles about with his great ox-eyes fixed on me. But as to his envelope of glory I have not seen a fag end of it, and I have told him so.
human
Do you really mean this, Philippa?
gpt
I do. He wrings his hands and sighs. He gets no change out of me, I promise you.
human
This is a very strange condition of affairs.
gpt
It only shows how well matched we are. I do not suppose you will find two other people in England so situated as we are, and therefore so admirably suited to one another.
human
There is much in what you say. But how are we to rid ourselves of the nuisance--for it is a nuisance being thus haunted. We cannot spend all our time in a theatre.
gpt
We must defy them. Marry in spite of them.
human
I never did defy my wife when she was alive. I do not know how to pluck up courage now that she is dead. Feel my hand, Philippa, how it trembles. She has broken my nerve. When I was young I could play spellikins--my hand was so steady. Now I am quite incapable of doing anything with the little sticks.
gpt
Well, hearken to what I propose, said Miss Weston.
human
I will beard the old cat----
gpt
Hush, not so disrespectful; she was my wife.
human
Well, then, the ghostly old lady, in her den. You think she will appear if I go to pay you a visit?
gpt
Sure of it. She is consumed with jealousy. She had no personal attractions herself, and you have a thousand. I never knew whether she loved me, but she was always confoundedly jealous of me.
human
Very well, then. You have often spoken to me about changes in the decoration of your villa. Suppose I call on you to-morrow afternoon, and you shall show me what your schemes are.
gpt
And your ghost, will he attend you?
human
Most probably. He also is as jealous as a ghost can well be.
gpt
Well, so be it. I shall await your coming with impatience. Now, then, we may as well go to our respective homes.