human
MOTHER, THEY THINK SHE'S A ZEPPELIN.
gpt
Plough and Horses.
human
I be mortal sorry for that poor George--cut up as ever I see a man at thought of it.
gpt
Tenderest-hearted fellow in these 'ere parts, and a true friend to all dumb animals.
human
She be more 'n an animal to 'im. 'Aving no chick nor child, you may say as she's companioned 'im these many months.
gpt
She's been a right good sow to 'e.
human
An' now 'e be nigh 'eart-broken 'long of these unnatural orders. For stuck ev'ry blessed pig 'as got to be should they Germans get anywheres within ten miles of us.
gpt
I see 'im now as 'e was when 'e first got wind of it--fair struck all of a 'eap, 'e were. 'I ain't got no objection to burning ricks,' 'e says, 'for ricks ain't got 'uman ways to 'em, same as my old sow. But kill my old sow,' 'e says, 'that's asking of me more 'n I can do.'
human
Somebody says that to George--and a cold-blooded word it seemed to me, considering 'is depth o' trouble.
gpt
What did the old chap say to that?
human
Ain't to be done--not really brisk like, any'ow.
gpt
Wouldn't say so, any way. An' the names 'e called the Government, or 'ooever 'twas as 'anded round them orders, fair surprised us all. Never knew the old chap could lay 'is tongue to the 'alf of it.
human
If ever they Germans get 'ereabout there'll be trouble for the Government about old George.
gpt
Evening, George. You come right in an' 'ave your pint, George.
human
I earnt my pint to-day--so I 'ave. Busiest day's work I done this side o' my wife's passing away, poor soul.
gpt
What you been doing, George?
human
She were a one to keep you busy like. If she be really resting now I reckon she be pretty miserable. 'Owever, that ain't neither 'ere nor there.
gpt
You tell us what you been up to, George. We only been talking o' you when in you walks as large as life.
human
We been talking o' you an' these 'ere orders, George, an' we feels with you to a man. If you should 'ave to kill that fine sow o' yours along of a lot o' 'ungry Germans 'twill be a mortal shame.
gpt
I shan't never kill 'er for no Germans, so I promises you.
human
Then they'll do the killing theirselves--they be dabsters at that.
gpt
No Germans ain't going to kill my sow. Nor I ain't going to kill 'er in an 'urry to please nobody.
human
You'll get yourself in the wrong box, George, if you don't mind.
gpt
You be too venturesome, George--at your old age.
human
An' you a pensioner, too. Don't do to be too venturesome when you're well stricken in years.
gpt
I know what I be saying, though, for all that. Don't do to wait till you 'ave to waste a good pig--all for nothing like. Good money she be worth, an' I says to myself, 'You 'ave the money now, my boy, as the old sow 'll fetch, before it be too late.' My old sow be pretty nigh pork by now, up at butcher's.