human
Basis for an agreement is rather wanting, ain't it? I regard you as a person of ordinary sanity, so I don't imagine you were going to propose either that I should nobly resign her in your favour, or you in mine. Then what on earth is there left to do?
gpt
We have to think of her as well as ourselves, said Gerrard, trying to steady his voice.
human
She may not marry at all, as she said --Charteris snorted--
gpt
You're wrong there, he said.
human
Speak for yourself. I want to see her married to me, and I'd undertake to make her happy. I shall be an uncommon good husband, I can tell you. What are you laughing at, pray?
gpt
I'm not laughing--at least, not exactly, gasped Gerrard, restraining himself with difficulty.
human
Forgive me, old fellow. It was the picture of you saying to the future Mrs Charteris, 'Be happy, or I'll know the reason why,' that overcame me.
gpt
Of course I know I can't put it pretty, as you could, he admitted grudgingly.
human
But I mean to marry her, and make her happy too.
gpt
And so do I, said Gerrard again.
human
But it's quite clear she can't marry both of us, and mayn't marry either of us, ain't it? Well, what I say is, let us carry the affair through decently, so that the best man may win, if either of us wins at all. That appeals to you, doesn't it?
gpt
Not a bit, said Charteris promptly.
human
You are the best man.
gpt
Oh, don't be an ass. What do medals for mathematics matter here? You are bigger than I am, and heaps better to look at. In fact, my dear Bob, I might even say of you that you were the least little bit showy. Gerrard was falling back insensibly into the old chaffing tone, but a look on his friend's face warned him that the time was not yet quite ripe for this, and he went on hastily.
human
At any rate, each of us has advantages on his side, we'll say. Then let us fight fair. You weren't thinking of proposing again every time you see her? In that case, it would soon be _darwaza band_[2] when you called, I'm afraid. Let us agree not to make any move, either of us, for a year--or six months, if you insist upon it, as he read protest in Charteris's eye,
gpt
If I didn't know you for a cunning old weasel, I should put you down as jolly green, Hal. Suppose she should meanwhile intimate, in the most unimaginably proper and delicate way, a preference for either of us?
human
For the present one or the absent one? asked Gerrard drily.
gpt
Well, in either case, I think the present one ought to let the absent one know, before taking any action. But don't look so blue. You forget that we shall both be in our districts, at a safe distance from Ranjitgarh, for six months at least.
human
And in the meantime she may marry some one else.
gpt
Then we shan't have lost our friendship as well as her.
human
I believe you, my boy! You don't know what a bore it has been this last fortnight, remembering what was between us whenever I wanted to tell you anything. Done with you, then, subject to necessary modifications to be agreed upon from time to time by mutual consent, and to the approval of the lady.
gpt
But you wouldn't tell her?
human
Wouldn't I, just? Why, how is she to keep our joint memory green against the assaults of eligible subcommissioners and fat Commissariat colonels, unless she has this to remember us by? Hang suffering in silence! Let her know what fine fellows she has got waiting on her nod.
gpt
Well, you can tell her,
human
Not I. Be carried away into proposing again, and lose my turn? no, thank you. We will tell her together, my young friend, and keep a jolly keen eye on each other the whole time. And we'll do it at the ball. Come, this is something like life!
gpt
But she may not choose to grant us an opportunity.
human
What'll you take on it? Do you think she don't know she has set you and me by the ears? If not, old Mother Jardine will soon enlighten her. And then--oh, my revered Hal, can you doubt what her first move will be? To reconcile us, my boy, as if we were two dirty little snivelling urchins in her village school at home! Will she make us shake hands? Oh, ain't it glorious!