human
I believe, on my life, Purt, chuckled Chet,
gpt
Better let _me_ eat the ice cream for you, old man, advised Lance, seriously.
human
Don't make an exhibition of yourself here.
gpt
That's what I am, said Purt, sadly.
human
Fawncy meeting any of the Stricklands, or the Tarbot-Rushes, or General Maline's people, here when I'm in this condition. Weally, it is dweadful to contemplate.
gpt
It's tough, I allow, said Chet callously.
human
What you need is a mask and a blanket to disguise yourself.
gpt
You're not likely to meet any of Centerport's Four Hundred over here at Cavern Island Park, laughed Laura.
human
So you need not fear.
gpt
I should think you would be just as ashamed presenting yourself before _us_ as before those Maline girls, said Jess, tossing her head.
human
I am insulted. No! you cannot pay for my ice cream, Mr. Sweet. Chet will pay for it.
gpt
Gee, Jess, chuckled Lance Darby.
human
If you eat more'n two dishes Chet will go broke. I know the state of his finances to-day. And Purt always has plenty of money.
gpt
Weally, Miss Morse, urged Pretty, who was not usually prone to spend his money.
human
Weally, you must let me pay the check--for all. It is my treat, you know. And I assure you, I had no intention of saying anything to offend you.
gpt
But you consider those Maline girls--and they are the homeliest girls in Centerport--of more importance than Laura and Dora and Dorothy and me. You're not ashamed to appear before us with your outfit all smudged up!
human
But, my dear Miss Morse!
gpt
Don't you 'dear' me, Mister! ejaculated Jess, with every appearance of anger.
human
If I'm not as good as Sissy Maline----
gpt
Oh, you are! You are! declared Purt, in haste.
human
You misunderstand. I am in this horrid state. But--you see--you saw it happen and realize that it was an unavoidable accident----
gpt
Nothing of the kind! snapped Jess, still apparently unyielding.
human
If you hadn't tried to smoke a nasty cigarette----
gpt
Oh, I assure you it was a very mild one. I have them made extremely mild--and with my monogram on the paper. Weally, you know----
human
Horrid thing! You're the only boy who smokes them that we know. What do you say, girls? Sha'n't we cut Purt right off of our calling lists if he doesn't give up monogrammed cigarettes?
gpt
They're the worst kind, murmured Chet.
human
The monogram makes 'em so much more deadly.
gpt
I tried one of Purt's coffin nails once--ugh! admitted Lance.
human
He calls 'em mild. But he's so saturated with nicotine that he doesn't know what 'mild' means. I believe they make his cigarettes out of rope-yarn and distilled opium. One puff made me ill all day.
gpt
Impossible, dear boy!
human
I believe it's as Lance says, said Laura, gravely.
gpt
And Purt sets a very bad example for the other boys.
human
Sure! grinned her brother.
gpt
We're all likely to run off and send for a thousand monogrammed cigarettes.
human
What! what! cried Jess.
gpt
Did Purt buy a _thousand_?
human
I--I had to, Miss Josephine, to get the monogram printed on the wrapper, you know.
gpt
Come, said Laura, still with a serious air.
human
We must decide what is to be done with this culprit, girls.
gpt
I think he should not be allowed to associate with any of the girls of Central High,
human
Or with the boys, either,
gpt
His example _is_ dreadfully bad,
human
Weally! I assure you---- panted Purt, wrigging all over, and not quite sure whether the girls meant it, or were
gpt
Have you any more of those nasty cigarettes with you?
human
So you only smoked one of them to-day?
gpt
And he only just got that lit when the vapor from the gasoline caught fire. Like to have burned him to death,
human
That single smoke was certainly a very expensive one for you, Master Purt, declared Laura.
gpt
For perhaps it has cost you your motor-boat At least, it has cost you more than the whole thousand cigarettes were worth. Kindly throw those disreputable looking things away!
human
Ugh! now you'll poison the fish,
gpt
Never mind the fish, said Laura, still intent upon the victim.
human
Now, Purt, how many cigarettes have you left at home?
gpt
Oh--I--ah----
human
Do not prevaricate! commanded the girl.
gpt
Answer at once.
human
Why--I--I have most of the thousand left,
gpt
Say! you always carry around a full case to flash on the fellows--I see you,
human
Ye--es,
gpt
Tell the truth, sir! How many of the horrid things have you left at home?
human
Nine hundred and ninety!
gpt
And--and you--you've nev--never smoked even _one_?
human
Not until to-day,
gpt
Oh, hold me, somebody! cried Lance.
human
And he's had those cigarettes for three months, I know!
gpt
Purt, you'll be the death of us yet,
human
I--I couldn't get used to the taste of them in my mouth,
gpt
You're more fun than a box of monkeys!
human
That reminds me, girls, said Chet, suddenly, and picking up the checks to pay the bill before Purt Sweet could get around to it.
gpt
There's an enormously funny monkey over here. Trained to a hair. I saw him over in Centerport when his owner brought him through----
human
I saw that monkey--with a piano organ. And such a nice looking Italian with it,
gpt
Look out, Lance, whispered Chet, grinning,
human
Why, he was playing in the streets, over in town,
gpt
That was just to advertise his act before the season opened, declared Chet.
human
So he told me.
gpt
All right, Laura said.
human
The boat isn't due yet, so we might as well remain with you boys until it comes and so keep you out of mischief.
gpt
But I really look so badly----
human
Never mind. You won't meet the Maline girls here,
gpt
Come on, Purt--be a sport, whispered Lance, with a wicked grin.
human
It won't cost you anything except what you give to the monkey--and that's a private affair between you and the monk you know.