human
How very kind of your aunt to spare you! said Grace to her friend;
gpt
I hardly expected it, knowing how much she depends upon you.
human
Oh yes! was the reply:
gpt
Yes, it is very wonderful, dear Mary. Certainly our new neighbour is a most earnest and useful man; and he has shown his discernment, too, in getting hold of yourself to work for him in Bridgepath. But I am afraid you will find it very up-hill work; you'll want the strength of a horse, the patience of Job, and the zeal of an apostle in such a place as that.
human
Certainly, I shall want the grace of an apostle, said the other quietly;
gpt
It is very good of you to say so, Mary; I am afraid the work wouldn't suit me. I don't mind making sacrifices--indeed, I think I can truly say it is one of my chief pleasures to make them; but there must be something very depressing in the jog-trot sort of work you are called on to do. I don't mind anything, so long as it has a little bit of dash in it; but I am afraid I should soon grow weary of a regular grind like yours.
human
Oh, but you are quite mistaken about my work at Bridgepath, said the other, laughing.
gpt
There is nothing dull or monotonous about it; and it is such a happiness to see the light of God's truth beginning to dawn on dark and troubled hearts. And there is one particularly interesting family--I mean John Price's. You have heard, I dare say, that he was steward to the squire, and that he lost almost everything by his poor master's extravagance. Poor man, he is bed-ridden now, and I fear had little comfort even from his Bible, for he seemed to have learned little from it but patience. But, oh! How he has brightened up, and his wife and daughter, too, now that they have been led to see that it is their privilege to work and suffer _from_ salvation instead of _for_ salvation.
human
I don't understand you,
gpt
Don't you? Oh, it makes all the difference. Poor John Price has been reading his Bible, and bearing his troubles patiently, in the hope that at the end he may be accepted and saved through his Saviour's merits. That is what I mean by working _for_ salvation.
human
And what else, dear Mary, would you have him do?
gpt
O Grace! This is poor work indeed, working in view of a merely possible salvation. No! What he has learned now is to see that his Saviour, in whom he humbly and truly believes, has given him a present salvation; so that he, and his wife and daughter too, can now say, `We love him, because he first loved us.' And so they work and suffer cheerfully, and even thankfully, from love to that Saviour who has already received them as his own. This is what I mean by working _from_ salvation. Surely we shall work more heartily for one of whom we know that he _has_ saved us, than for one of whom we know only that he has saved others, and may perhaps save us also in the end.
human
I see what you mean, dear Mary, but I never saw it so before. Such a view of God's love to us personally must take the selfishness out of our good works, because what we do will be done just simply from love to Christ. It is a beautiful way of looking at God's dealings with us.
gpt
Yes, Grace; and as true and scriptural as it is beautiful. It is just what God sees that we need, and furnishes us with the most constraining motive to serve him, and to deny self in his service.
human
I see it, said Miss Willerly sadly and thoughtfully, after a pause.
gpt
I very much fear, dear Mary, that I have been greatly deceiving myself. I have been just simply building up a monument to my own honour and glory out of my heap of little daily crosses.
human
Nay, dear Grace, you are dealing too severely with yourself.
gpt
No, I think not. At any rate, I am sadly aware that not the love of Christ, but the love of human applause, has been the constraining motive in my acts of self-denial. I have made such a parade of my willingness to thwart my own will that I might please others, so that while I should have been startled to see a full-grown trumpeter at my side proclaiming my unselfishness, I have all the while been keeping in my service a little dwarf page, who has been sounding out my praises on his shrill whistle.
human
You judge yourself hardly, dear Grace; and yet, no doubt, self does enter largely even into our unselfishness. I am sure I have felt it, oh, how deeply! And specially just lately, since I have undertaken this work at Bridgepath.
gpt
You, dear Mary!
human
Yes, indeed. And I see now how wisely our heavenly Father ordered his discipline in my case. There was indeed a `needs-be' in my dear aunt's former harshness and irritability to me; but for that, and for her disparaging remarks on my conduct, I might have been more self-seeking than I am. But the discipline has been changed now, and I trust that the chastisement has not been wholly in vain. What we all want, I am sure, if we are to be true workers for God, is to lift our eyes from self, and keep them steadily fixed on Him who has done so much for us.
gpt
I am sure you are right, said the other.
human
I know I wish to do right, and I feel a pleasure in crossing my own inclination when it will gratify others; but then my inmost look has been to the world and its approbation. `What will people say? What will people think?' or, at any rate, `What will good people say and think?' this has been the prominent thought in my heart, I fear.
gpt
Well, dear Grace, I suppose this is so, more or less, with us all. What we want, I think, and comparatively seldom find in these showy and surface days, is a high sense of duty, so that we just act as duty calls, let the world, or good people even, judge of us or speak of us as they please.
human
And yet, dear Mary, I think I see a little crevice through which self may creep in even there. I have met some of your `duty' people who have flung themselves so violently against the prejudices of society, or, at any rate, of good people, crying out all the time, `Duty, duty! It don't matter to us what the world thinks,' that they have given great offence where they might have avoided giving any, and have set up people's backs against what is good and true.
gpt
I dare say you have met such, dear Grace, and I think you may be talking to one of the class now, said Miss Stansfield, laughing;
human
Ah! I believe you are right, said her friend, with a sigh.
gpt
I wish there were more of such true unselfishness amongst us; I wish I were such a character myself.
human
And so you are, dear Grace, in the main. No one can possibly doubt your genuineness and sincerity. You have only just to step up on to the higher platform, and, as your heart's gaze becomes more fixed on a Saviour known and loved, you will cease to think about how your self- denial looks in the eyes of others, and will feel the cross which you carry after Christ in the path of duty to be easy and his burden light.
gpt
I shall not forget our conversation on this subject, said Miss Willerly with tears in her eyes.
human
I always thought that I hated selfishness, but now I see that I have been blinded to my own. I suppose it is very difficult for us to see it in ourselves as it really is, especially in these days when there are so many attractive forms of self-denial. It occurred to me the other day what an odd thing it would be to see how a number of utterly selfish people would get on if thrown together for some weeks, with not a single unselfish person amongst them, and unable to get rid of one another's company. I feel sure the result would teach an admirable lesson on the misery of a thoroughly selfish disposition.
gpt
I think so too, Grace, said her companion, much amused.
human
What do you say to putting a story or allegory together on the subject.
gpt
Capital! cried Miss Willerly;
human
You must let me be the first to see it,
gpt
Oh, certainly; and you must give me your free and candid criticisms.
human
Yes, I will do so; and I don't doubt I shall find profit in the reading of it, and a little bit of myself in more than one of your characters.