human
You crazy nut, said Jimmy, on the way up to Pierson Hall.
gpt
How did you come to get pinched?
human
Method in my madness, old top. Let's swing around to the _News_ office. I've got a couple of articles for them, two more scoops.
gpt
And what are they?
human
O, read the _News_ in the morning, said the Codfish, joyfully.
gpt
You wouldn't understand the workings of the genius mind like this, tapping his forehead,
human
It always gives me a feeling of deep exhaustion to see those heelers working so hard on that sheet.
gpt
Do they work hard?
human
Work hard! Great fishes of the vasty deep, they put in an amount of hours that ought to make you football fellows blush with shame, if you could blush. The ordinary news-heeler doesn't have time to eat his meals.
gpt
You don't cut out many, I notice,
human
Yes, but I'm not the ordinary kind.
gpt
I've heard you say that before.
human
These other fellows chase little bits of things for news' sake, while I create news for my sake. Get the difference?
gpt
Right--O, said Frank.
human
You created some the other day--some bone news.
gpt
Great day's work. Although I started late on this competition I must be nearly up to the leader now, and a little more hustling will shoot me to the front.
human
What an ego! exclaimed Frank.
gpt
But now in the privacy of our own room, will you kindly tell me, why, how and what for did you get yourself in the hands of the law to-night, whose bicycle was it you borrowed, and when are we going to get the money we advanced to release your worthless carcass from hock?
human
My, what a lot of questions. Do you mean to tell me you haven't visioned my scheme, a bright young fellow like you? Pshaw, pshaw, Armstrong, I didn't think it of you.
gpt
Go ahead and elucidate, Sherlock Holmes!
human
It seems hardly necessary, but it is said, and truly I now perceive, that brains and brawn are not kindred attributes of the genus football man. In a word, I got myself pinched, and thereby made news for the _News_. Savez?
gpt
You got arrested on purpose to write up your own arrest?
human
Sure thing, surest thing you ever knew. Made a pretty little story of it, touched on the brutality of the officer who hauled me into the station, and, incidentally, made a strong plea for the use of the city sidewalks by heelers on bicycles when the streets are as dusty as they are now, to say nothing of a little hit at the lack of courtesy accorded the Yale student by the ordinary, garden variety of policeman.
gpt
And this is what we provided good money for!
human
This is what we were dragged from our room in the dead hour of night for, this is the thing for which we deposited our good money! I hope they give you a thousand dollars and costs, and send you to jail for a year, to-morrow morning.
gpt
O, yes, continued the Codfish, not noticing Turner's outburst,
human
Well, you've had your trouble for nothing, old lunatic. The _News_ won't print anything like that.
gpt
If they don't, they don't know good news when they see it.
human
Costly news, I should say, grunted Frank.
gpt
Costly with our money. We want our money back and fifty per cent. interest for the wear and tear on our constitutions in this night air.
human
I'll pay it to you out of my dividends from the _News_ Board when I cash in.
gpt
Then we'll never get it, groaned Jimmy.
human
I'm going to bed. Codfish has absolutely gone nutty.
gpt
That's always said about geniuses by ordinary folks, old top. Time alone will prove who is the nutty gent,