human
Mamma, she said,
gpt
I must tell you. Aunt Charlotte, you have always been kind to me. I cannot go away; do not ask me.
human
Sit down, Dorothy. Nora, make her sit down. You will not be asked to take a step, my daughter; everything is arranged; don't trouble yourself even to think.
gpt
You do not understand, mamma. But I myself have not understood until lately. I cannot leave Belmonte.
human
But Dr. Hotham thinks you can, interposed Mrs. Tracy, soothingly;
gpt
Let me stay here; I wish to stay here.
human
But we have never intended to spend our lives at Bellosguardo,
gpt
Let me stay a little while longer, mamma.
human
You mean that you will be willing to go later? But, we think that now is the time. You have nothing to do save to rest here quietly, and then go to sleep; you will open your eyes in Vevey.
gpt
Mamma, you don't know. There's an ache that will not leave me. I haven't told you about it. But I'm _so_ unhappy!
human
She is wandering. Please go and send some one immediately for the doctor. Write a note for the man to take with him.
gpt
I didn't know what it meant myself for ever so long. But now I do, and it's all simple. I shall just stay quietly here. This is the best place. And you mustn't mind, for it makes _me_ very happy.
human
My darling, have you written? What do you mean?
gpt
What do I mean? Dorothy repeated. She smiled; into her white face came a flush of color.
human
I mean that I shall see him very soon now. It won't be long to wait.
gpt
She has sent for him, thought the aunt.
human
I was right; it is Owen.
gpt
That is why I wish to stay here, Dorothy went on.
human
Everything here is associated with Alan; he liked Belmonte so much.
gpt
Alan?
human
In the beginning I didn't in the least know that I was going to feel it so. But that ache came, and it wouldn't stop. I tried all sorts of things--don't you remember? I tried studying. I tried music lessons. He used to urge me to sing. He liked long walks, and I never would go; so then I took long walks. You haven't forgotten them, have you? But the ache went on, and I could not stand it. So I asked you to go to Paris. Paris has always been so funny and amusing. But it wasn't funny any more. When we came back here I thought that perhaps some one coming up every day and staying a long time would make me forget. But having Waddy was worse than being alone, and at last I hated him. Owen Charrington, too! Owen used to make me laugh; I thought he would make me laugh again. But he didn't at all. And when he asked me that last day to ride it was like a knife; for Alan always went with me, and would never say anything to spoil my pleasure. Yet he did not care about it really, though I insisted upon going day after day. That is the way it was about everything. But I'm paying for it now; I miss him so--I miss him so! Alan! Alan!--