human
Well, then, my friend, I have paid. I thank God that I failed then to make another wretched as myself. It was only I who again was wretched. Ah! is there no little pity in your heart for me, after all?--who succeeded only to fail so miserably?
gpt
See, she went on;
human
She should not have doubted, said I.
gpt
I shall not go back and ask her again. The weakest of men are strong sometimes!
human
Ah, now you are but a man! Being such, you can not understand how terribly much the faith of man means for a woman. It was her _need_ for you that spoke, not her _doubt_ of you. Forgive her. She was not to blame. Blame me! Do what you like to punish me! Now, I shall make amends. Tell me what I best may do. Shall I go to her, shall I tell her?
gpt
Not as my messenger. Not for me.
human
No? Well, then, for myself? That is my right. I shall tell her how priestly faithful a man you were.
gpt
Madam, I said,
human
God knows, I am no priest. I deserve no credit. It was chance that cast Elisabeth and me together before ever I saw you. I told you one fire was lit in my heart and had left room for no other. I meet youth and life with all that there is in youth and life. I am no priest, and ask you not to confess with me. We both should confess to our own souls.
gpt
It is as I said, she went on;
human
Well, then, call it so--married after my fashion of marriage; the fashion of which I told you, of a cabin and a bed of husks. As to what you have said, I forget it, I have not heard it. Your sort could have no heart beat for one like me. 'Tis men like myself are slaves to women such as you. You could never have cared for me, and never did. What you loved, Madam, was only what you had _lost_, was only what you saw in this country--was only what this country means! Your past life, of course, I do not know.
gpt
Sometime, she murmured,
human
I will tell you.
gpt
Whatever it was, Madam, you have been a brilliant woman, a power in affairs. Yes, and an enigma, and to none more than to yourself. You show that now. You only loved what Elisabeth loved. As woman, then, you were born for the first time, touched by that throb of her heart, not your own. `Twas mere accident I was there to feel that throb, as sweet as it was innocent. You were not woman yet, you were but a child. You had not then chosen. You have yet to choose. It was Love that you loved! Perhaps, after all, it was America you loved. You began to see, as you say, a wider and a sweeter world than you had known.
human
So then I go on, Madam, and say we are the same. I am the agent of one idea, you of another. I ask you once more to choose. I know how you will choose.
gpt
Yes, there is a gulf between male and female, after all. As though what he said could be true! Listen! She spoke up more sharply.
human
If results came as you liked, what difference would the motives make?
gpt
How do you mean?
human
Only this, Monsieur, that I am not so lofty as you think. I might do something. If so, 'twould need to be through some motive wholly sufficient to _myself_.
gpt
Search, then, your own conscience.
human
I have one, after all! It might say something to me, yes.
gpt
Once you said to me that the noblest thing in life was to pass on the torch of a great principle.
human
I lied! I lied! she cried, beating her hands together.
gpt
I am a woman! Look at me!