human
Them dumb animals be mighty grateful,
gpt
Ah!
human
But, Lord! what scandal there be in the world!
gpt
Very well, very true; sensible verses those, said the Corporal, approvingly;
human
Now there's Jacobina, 'cause she's a good cat, a faithful servant, the whole village is against her: such lies as they tell on her, such wappers, you'd think she was the devil in garnet! I grant, I grant, added the Corporal, in a tone of apologetic candour,
gpt
If that were all Jacobina had done!
human
All! what else did she do? Why she eat up John Tomkins's canary-bird; and did not John Tomkins, saucy rascal, say you could not sing better nor a raven?
gpt
I have nothing to say against the poor creature for that, said Peter, stroking the cat of his own accord.
human
Cats will eat birds, 'tis the 'spensation of Providence. But what! Corporal! and Peter hastily withdrawing his hand, hurried it into his breeches pocket--
gpt
And well, grunted the Corporal,
human
It was priced three pence ha'penny,
gpt
Augh--baugh! you would not pay Joe Webster all he asks! What's the use of being a man of the world, unless one makes one's tradesmen bate a bit? Bargaining is not cheating, I hope?
human
God forbid!
gpt
But as to the bit string, Jacobina took it solely for your sake. Ah, she did not think you were to turn against her!
human
There, Peter, net for you, to hold lemons. Thank Jacobina for that; she got the string. Says I to her one day, as I was sitting, as I might be now, without the door, 'Jacobina, Peter Dealtry's a good fellow, and he keeps his lemons in a bag: bad habit,--get mouldy,--we'll make him a net: and Jacobina purred, (stroke the poor creature, Peter!)--so Jacobina and I took a walk, and when we came to Joe Webster's I pointed out the ball o'twine to her. So, for your sake, Peter, she got into this here scrape-- augh.
gpt
Ah! quoth Peter laughing,
human
And now, Peter, said the Corporal, taking his friend's hand,
gpt
I am going to prove friendship to you--going to do you great favour.
human
Aha! said Peter,
gpt
Bother! cried the Corporal,
human
I'm not the man as makes much of doing a friend a kindness. Hold jaw! tell you what,--tell you what: am going away on Wednesday at day-break, and in my absence you shall--
gpt
What? my good Corporal.
human
Take charge of Jacobina!
gpt
Take charge of the devil!
human
Augh!--baugh!--what words are those? Listen to me.
gpt
I won't!
human
You shall!
gpt
I'll be d--d if I do!
human
Very well, very well! said the Corporal chucking up his chin,
gpt
Jacobina can take care of herself! Jacobina knows her friends and her foes as well as her master! Jacobina never injures her friends, never forgives foes. Look to yourself! look to yourself! insult my cat, insult me! Swear at Jacobina, indeed!
human
If she steals my cream!
gpt
Did she ever steal your cream?
human
No! but, if--
gpt
Did she ever steal your cream?
human
I can't say she ever did.
gpt
Or any thing else of yours?
human
Not that I know of; but--
gpt
Never too late to mend.
human
If--
gpt
Will you listen to me, or not?
human
Well.
gpt
You'll listen?
human
Yes.
gpt
Know then, that I wanted to do you kindness.
human
Humph!
gpt
Hold jaw! I taught Jacobina all she knows.
human
More's the pity!
gpt
Hold jaw! I taught her to respect her friends,--never to commit herself in doors--never to steal at home--never to fly at home--never to scratch at home--to kill mice and rats--to bring all she catches to her master-- to do what he tells her--and to defend his house as well as a mastiff: and this invaluable creature I was going to lend you:--won't now, d--d if I do!
human
Humph.
gpt
Hold jaw! When I'm gone, Jacobina will have no one to feed her. She'll feed herself--will go to every larder, every house in the place--your's best larder, best house;--will come to you oftenest. If your wife attempts to drive her away, scratch her eyes out; if you disturb her, serve you worse than Joe Webster's little boy:--wanted to prevent this-- won't now, d--d if I do!
human
But, Corporal, how would it mend the matter to take the devil in-doors?
gpt
It is very hard, said Peter grumblingly,
human
Villainous! You ought to be proud of her affection. She returns good for evil--she always loved you; see how she rubs herself against you--and that's the reason why I selected you from the whole village, to take care of her; but you at once injure yourself and refuse to do your friend a service. Howsomever, you know I shall be with young Squire, and he'll be master here one of these days, and I shall have an influence over him-- you'll see--you'll see. Look that there's not another Spotted Dog
gpt
But what would my wife say, if I took the cat? she can't abide its name.
human
Let me alone to talk to your wife. What would she say if I bring her from Lunnun Town a fine silk gown, or a neat shawl, with a blue border-- blue becomes her; or a tay-chest--that will do for you both, and would set off the little back parlour. Mahogany tay-chest--inlaid at top-- initials in silver--J. B. to D. and P. D.--two boxes for tay, and a bowl for sugar in the middle.--Ah! ah! Love me, love my cat! When was Jacob Bunting ungrateful?--augh!
gpt
Well, well! will you talk to Dorothy about it?