human
How did you happen to get drunk, Nick? Judge Harlin asked.
gpt
I thought you had quit. What did you do it for?
human
Sure, and what did I do it for? said Nick, and the strong Irish accent in his speech told how deeply he felt his misdeed. For he was always most Irish when most moved.
gpt
I reckon, he went on, and the rolling intonation fell from his tongue like a faint breath from the green isle itself,
human
I reckon I did it just to show my friends what a measly, coyote, white-livered, tackey, ornery, spavined, colicky, mangy, blitherin' sort of a beast I am. Sure, now, Judge, I just wanted everybody to know what a gee-whillikined damn fool I can be if I try. And they know, now. Oh, yes, they know. There's nothin' more I can tell. Hold on, Judge! Sure, and I'm thinkin' it all came along of the way I mixed my drinks yesterday when I first struck the Palmleaf. I had beer, and whisky, and some mint juleps, yes, and maybe a cocktail, and I think there was some more beer--yes, there was more beer, and I think likely that I had some brandy up there in that sick man's room. For I seem to remember that I took a drink of brandy because it was goin' to kill him if he drank it, and so I took it in his place. Yes, I must have had some brandy, sure, because nothin' but brandy will set me up that way. Now, just look at that, Judge! Ain't that a fine lay-out for a man to swallow that knows better? If I'd never been inside a saloon before there'd be some excuse. But me a-mixin' my drinks like that! It's plumb ridiculous!
gpt
Jim Halliday isn't sorry you did it. He's as proud as a boy with his first pants over the haul he made yesterday. I hear he's going to be measured for a brand-new, tailor-made cartridge belt and six-shooter as a memento of the occasion.
human
He'd better hurry up, then, before the occasion turns a back somersault on him. I reckon what he needs most is a new hat that will be about six sizes too big for him a week from now. Jim Halliday's all right as long as he keeps to his own side of the street, but he'd better not come over here or he'll be filled so full of bullets that he won't know himself from a dice box. Say, Judge, what's become of that John Chiny's pigtail they say I cut off?
gpt
I suppose it's in the hands of the district attorney and will be brought in as part of the evidence when your case is tried.
human
Harry Gillam's got it, has he? Well, I want it myself. It's mine, and I want it as a reminder not to mix my drinks. What had I better do about this business, Judge?
gpt
There's only one thing you can do, Nick--plead guilty and throw yourself on the mercy of the court, and trust to your confounded Irish luck to get you off easy.