human
Janet, I think you hardly behave respectfully to your own minister in one matter.
gpt
Me, sir? exclaimed Janet;
human
I would like to see ony mon, no' to say woman, but yoursel', say that o' me! What can you mean, sir?
gpt
Weel, Janet, ye ken when I preach you're almost always fast asleep before I've given out my text, but when any of these young men from St. Andrew's preach for me, I see you never sleep a wink. Now, that's what I call no' using me as you should do.
human
Hoot, sir, was the reply,
gpt
Well, said he,
human
Wake up, wake up; there's a man in the house! cried Mrs. Macdougal to her husband the other night. Mac rolled out of bed and grasped his revolver, and opened the door to sally forth for the robber. Then, turning to his wife, he said:
gpt
Come, Maggie, and lead the way. It's a cowardly man that would hurt a woman.
human
Watchman, far eist? (Where is it?). The watchman thanked him and went to the Register Office, where he found he was going in the wrong direction and returned. On repassing the hotel, he was again called to by the Aberdonian, who bawled out,
gpt
Watchman, far was't? (Where was it?) On looking up to him, the watchman replied,
human
Ye're a leein' scoonril; ye first tell'd me it was far east, an' noo ye say it's far west; but I tell ye it's neither e' tane or e' tither, cause it's ower i' e' Coogate.