human
Beg pardon, Thayer; but can I speak to you for a moment?
gpt
May I have the pleasure of taking you to the dining-room?
human
What is it, Dane?
gpt
It's Lorimer in the smoking-room. That beast of a Lloyd Avalons has opened a perfect bar in there, and--and Lorimer is making a bit of a cad of himself, Bobby confessed reluctantly.
human
I tried to get him away; but he wouldn't come, and I thought perhaps you could start him. It's not that he is drunk, only he is talking rather too much, and I want to get him off before Beatrix gets wind of it. You know girls--
gpt
I know, Thayer assented gravely.
human
I'll see what I can do with him.
gpt
You musicians make me deadly weary,
human
Is that the reason you are trying to sit on them, Bobby? his cousin asked.
gpt
You'll find an easy chair just as restful to you and a good deal more so to the musician.
human
Don't interrupt me, Beatrix. I have things I wish to say.
gpt
Very likely; but it is barely possible that somebody else also may have things he wishes to say, and can't, because you talk so much.
human
Sally is busy eating bonbons, and Thayer would much better wait till I get through his indictment. He'll need all his voice to defend himself.
gpt
Go on, Bobby, she said encouragingly.
human
The sooner it is over, the better.
gpt
Thank you. Then I have the floor. Thayer, I never believe in talking about people behind their backs, so I look you squarely in the eye and ask you if you ever realize that you don't amount to much, after all.
human
Who told you?
gpt
Nobody. I evolved it.
human
I didn't know you were a critic.
gpt
I'm not, nor yet an interpreting artist. I create.
human
What, I should like to know!
gpt
Scareheads. I do them. If that's not creating, I should like to know what is. They never have any connection with facts.
human
What is your grievance?
gpt
I was just getting to that. As I say, I create. You only interpret. I don't know as it counts that you don't try to interpret my scareheads, though some of them would make stunning fugues. Take the last one, for instance: _Billions at Stake: Potato Corner in Prospect_. You could work up something fine from that, Thayer. Think of the chest tones you could throw into the single word _Potato_!
human
Bobby, you are growing discursive,
gpt
No; it is only my rhetorical method. I shall bring you up with a round turn, before you know it. Well, granted that we represent the two classes, the creative and the interpretive, which is the greater?
human
How can we tell, unless you stand back to back?
gpt
The fact is, you singers and players have a smug little fashion of forgetting that there is a composer back of you. You don't sing extempore, Thayer, make up the song as you go along. You're nothing more than a species of elocutionist, you know, trying to show the people who weren't on the spot what the composer really did when he created the thing.
human
Animated phonograph records, in short?
gpt
Yes, if you choose to call it that. Of course you count for something, else every composer could make a set of records and dispense with his interpreting artist once for all. But you fellows honestly do make an awful fuss about yourselves; now don't you?
human
Bobby!
gpt
Oh, yes; but I'm not meaning anything personal, Bobby responded amicably.
human
We know that Thayer's voice is beyond all odds the best we have heard for a three years. How do you do it, Thayer? You look as calm as a Dutch dolly; but you manage to tear us all to bits. Even I felt sanctified at your recital, and Miss Van Osdel's lashes were freighted with unshed tears.
gpt
That must be one of your next week's scareheads, she objected.
human
I never cry in public where there are electric lights, Mr. Thayer; it's horribly unbecoming to most women. But I did have to say a nonsense rhyme over to myself, to keep steady.
gpt
Yes, I taught you that trick, Beatrix asserted suddenly.
human
Lear is very soothing in an emotional crisis. _The Rubáiyát_ for gooseflesh and Lear for tears is my rule. _The Jumblies_ carried me safely through the fifth act of _Cyrano_. But go on, Bobby. We are nearly ready to change the subject.
gpt
Now take that recital of yours, Bobby pursued meditatively.
human
You were there to interpret Schubert and Franz and those fellows; but nobody is talking about Schubert and Franz, to-day. It is all Thayer, Cotton Mather Thayer, Baritone. It's all right enough. You did them awfully well; but there's the Them in the background, and it's not decent to forget Them.