human
Let us see, said he;
gpt
Pass over politics.
human
Here is a book announced from the pen of Mr. Bryant, the antiquarian, who is so well informed concerning events from the origin of the world to the Deluge. Fancy considering nothing of importance _after_ the Deluge! His work is disposed of in three words,--'Heavy, tiresome, pedantic.' Cumberland's romance is also treated in three words,--'Refined, sensible, and tender.'
gpt
Pass over literature.
human
The condemned of the week: 'Sarah Hoggs, to be hanged for stealing a piece of cloth that was spread out to dry; Laurence Williamson, to the same penalty for having cut down sundry young trees; item, Annie Smith, to one year's imprisonment for having taken forty shillings in the presence of witnesses; item, Florence Dunk, to be hanged for having taken five shillings privately; item, William Morton, to transportation for having assassinated his father.'
gpt
Pass over all that. What society news is there?
human
That's Topham, the editor of the _World_! exclaimed his lordship.
gpt
Bah! in a week's time he will be back again and everybody will be shaking hands with him.
human
Is there nothing else?
gpt
Nothing but two duels, three abductions, five or six bankruptcies, several fires, and a charade in verse.--Ah!
human
Well, what is it?
gpt
George Barrington, the gentleman-sharper, has been arrested at Edinburgh!
human
Barrington! a charming fellow! I recollect one evening at Ranelagh, when he showed me how he purloined a snuff-box, and as payment for the lesson he took my watch. And here he is under lock and key! Poor boy!
gpt
You need not pity him. He will plead his cause so eloquently that he will be acquitted, as he has been many a time.
human
In truth, he is a very Cicero among thieves. And the advertisements?
gpt
The alchemist Woulfe announces for sale an elixir which is a panacea for every malady. Samuel Wollmer will loan money to sons-of-family in embarrassment. As he is actuated by pure love of humanity, his terms will be very moderate. Mrs. Cresswell offers false hair, masks, and red pomade for the lips. Oh, oh! here's a gentleman of middle age who desires to meet a young lady of good appearance and amiable disposition, but discreet and lively. He'll find her, added Lebeau gravely.
human
I am convinced that his advertisement will be answered.