human
I know it seems presumption to ask so much. I am an insignificant nobody, and you might marry anyone you liked. In every sense of the word but one I am a wretched match for you, but love counts for something, and you will never find anyone to love you more. I'd give my very life to serve you, and I will give it, if you will trust yourself to me! My father was no older than I am when he became engaged, and he told me only the other day that he looked back on that hour as the beginning of his success. He would be glad to see me engaged also.
gpt
Have you spoken about me to him, then, as well as to your mother? I demanded testily. I felt so guilty about my own conduct that it was a relief to be able to find fault with someone else, and I worked myself up into quite a show of indignation.
human
You must have made very sure of my answer to be ready to discuss me in such a general fashion. It would have been more courteous to wait until you had my permission. You have placed us both in a most awkward position, for, as I said before, I could never marry you. It is quite impossible. I like you very much, but not in that way. Let us be friends, and forget everything else. We were so happy as we were--it is such a pity to spoil it all like this.
gpt
Spoil it! he repeated blankly. He had grown quite white while I was speaking, and his eyes had a dazed, startled expression.
human
Does it spoil things for you, Una, to know that I love you? But you have known that for a long time--everyone in the house found it out, and you could not have helped seeing it, too. You say I have made too sure of you. Forgive me, darling, but if I have done so it is only because I know you are too sweet and good to encourage a man when there was no hope. I am more sorry than I can say if I have annoyed you by speaking to my parents, but the mater naturally spoke to me when she saw how things were going, and I had to consult my father about ways and means. Una, darling, you don't mean it. You can't mean to break my heart after leading me on all these weeks?
gpt
I never led you on! I cried vainly.
human
I was only nice to you as I would have been to anyone else. I knew you liked me; but everyone who is kind and attentive does not want to marry one as a matter of course. It would be horrid to expect it. Lorna is my friend, and you are her brother, so of course--
gpt
It will be difficult to believe--but if you will tell me just once quite simply and plainly, I will take your word, Una. Don't protest, please--tell me truthfully, once for all: did you, or did you not, know I loved you with all my heart?
human
No. In a sense I could have said it truthfully enough, for I had no definite knowledge, but I remembered what Lorna had told me about the heroine in the novel; I remembered Mrs Forbes's wistful manner, and oh, a dozen little incidents too small to be written down, when Wallace's own manner had told the truth only too plainly. He was staring at me, poor boy, with his wan, miserable eyes, and I could not tell a lie. I began to cry in a feeble, helpless kind of way, and faltered out,
gpt
I--I thought you did, but I couldn't be sure. You know I couldn't be sure, and it was only for a little while! I am going home so soon that I didn't think it could matter.
human
Shall I tell you how much it matters? he asked huskily.
gpt
It matters just this, that you have spoilt my life! There was not a happier, more contented fellow living than I was--before you came. I loved my work, and loved my home. I intended to succeed in my profession, and the future was full of interest. I would not have changed places with any man on earth. Now! he held out his right hand and snapped his fingers expressively,
human
No, no, no! I cried in agony.
gpt
It isn't true. I am bad enough, but not a heartless monster. I will tell you the whole truth. I was miserable myself when I came here; ill and tired out, and sore because-- because they didn't care for me at home as much as I wanted. I always want people to like me. I did at school--Lorna will tell you that I did; and when you were nice to me it cheered me up, and made me happy again. I never dreamt that it was serious until a little time ago--last week--and even then I did not think you could possibly want to marry me--you were too young--you had no home--
human
No, that is true. I am no match for Miss Sackville. I was a fool to forget it. Thank you for reminding me,
gpt
Don't be cross with me! I never thought for one moment if you were poor or rich. That doesn't matter a bit. If I have made you miserable, I am miserable too. If you want me to be engaged to you--I will, and I'll try to like you. Please, please do not look like that! If I promise it will be all right, and you will forgive me for being so thoughtless, won't you, Wallace?
human
Poor Una, he said,
gpt
In a minute--one minute--only tell me first that you forgive me, and if there is nothing at all that I can do to help you, and show how wretchedly, wretchedly sorry I am!
human
Forgive you? he repeated sadly.
gpt
I love you, Una. I can forgive you, I expect, a good deal more easily than you will forgive yourself. Yes, there is something you can do--if you ever discover that another poor fellow is in love with you--and you are the sort of girl whom men will love--remember me and spare him this experience. Don't go on being `nice' to him. That kind of niceness is the worst form of cruelty.