human
Thursday night we came away--remember? That was the night you fell sick, and was burning and tossing all day Friday. Saturday you was better, but once or twice you didn't know me. It was the Friday night when the wolves came.
gpt
Are they still about? Nay, they can't be on so fair a morning. I feel washed clean, Ru. Weak, but--oh, I could do anything.
human
Weaker than you know. It'll pass. I saw the wolves last on Saturday. They scented something, I think, and drifted away.
gpt
It's all so still under the sun, and warm--what? I thought this was Saturday.
human
This is Monday, Ben. Yesterday was the Sabbath. I hadn't thought of that till now, when you began asking me about the time. It was yesterday your fever broke for good. These three days have been a hundred years. I've had much time to think, when there was nothing else I could do--mind the fire, gather more wood, then either think or go mad, but I've not gone mad. I have not prayed, Ben, since before dawn on the Friday morning.
gpt
I don't know what I should say about that. Father said, just before he died--did you hear?--said that God is far away.
human
And Mother's last prayer was not answered. She prayed, 'Deliver us from evil.' And mine have never been answered.
gpt
But we can't know that.
human
I can't say that I know anything, anything at all, except that I'm here with you, and the air has turned warm, and the Bay Path road must be somewhere a mile or so over yonder, and tomorrow we shall try for Roxbury.
gpt
And that thou hast killed a wolf.... Ru, if I didn't see that carcass under my nose----
human
I never lied to you. Oh--tales for your fancy now and then.
gpt
I know that. What did you do with the hide?
human
Flung it out to the cannibals. The entrails too, and the head. They were delighted.
gpt
Puh! What's this part I'm eating now and enjoying so?
human
Have you swallowed it, Mr. Cory?
gpt
I have, and you needn't try to make me puke.
human
A puppy. She was carrying young--six. I had one whole, when you was still in the fever.
gpt
Ow-ooh!
human
Oh, ay, your ears'll turn furry any day now. I say, Ben, when we're dirty-rich and famous, let's keep a few wolves on hand--you know, so to have roasted pups for guests of distinction.
gpt
Now you sound like yourself.
human
Do I?... Ben, I--something happened that night, Friday night.
gpt
What do you mean?
human
I don't know whether I can tell it.... When I dragged the carcass to the fire I was crying like a fool, I don't know why. Sat there crying with her bloody head on my knees, some-way I couldn't make it seem she was only a piece of meat. Later I could, later it didn't matter. And then--well....
gpt
What is it, Ru?
human
I found my britches were wet. Nay, not what you think, and not her blood neither, though that's dried all over 'em and I declare we both smell like the Devil's own. Remember you told me how some time soon, whenever it happened, I'd be spending the seed?
gpt
Oh--of course.
human
Ben, I didn't know it when it happened. It must have been the moment when I was killing her. I didn't know it could happen that way.
gpt
I didn't neither.
human
Is something wrong with me?
gpt
No, no.
human
You see, I already knew how it feels. I did confess to you about that--long ago, remember? That was the time when you told me, about the change, and the seed.
gpt
Yes. Well, they say it's a sin to bring it on, but I think it must be venial, Ru, for Jesse said once that every man's vessels are alway in need of it. The dreams don't help. Nothing's wrong with you.
human
But why didn't I know it when it happened?
gpt
Oh, the excitement--why, you must have been white-hot, to stand up to a wolf with nothing but a little stick. I didn't know it could happen that way, but I think it's not so strange.
human
Jesse Plum.... Why did Father never speak of those things?
gpt
I don't know, Ru.
human
Did he to you?
gpt
No, he never.... Look: I remember I spent once, merely from lifting a big rock. And--oh, tree-climbing, things like that. So you see--anyway there's nothing wrong with you, brother, nothing.
human
Do you have those dreams much, Ben?
gpt
Not too often. You?
human
Oh, they....
gpt
You will. You'll be dreaming about girls, and----
human
I ... You'll be strong enough to go on tomorrow, Ben. One thing: we needn't fret now about anyone following from Springfield. That snow will have covered everything. I hope they found the turkey blood before it began a-falling. We can go slowly, rest as soon as we come to another fair shelter. This morning might be the start of another thaw, even an early spring--only look at the tears of that spruce, how they fall in the sun! We'll find more food some-way, now that you're well. There must be towns between here and Roxbury, where we could work for a few meals, a few nights' rest.
gpt
Why, sure, we'll make it.... What happened to your jacket?
human
My--oh, the wolf.
gpt
But the wolf did not reach you, brother.
human
I dragged her.
gpt
And so got your jacket torn and muddy on the inside? But I found it wrapped around my legs yesterday when I woke with a clear head, and you slipped it away, but I knew. Last night when it turned a little colder you put it around me again, thinking I was asleep, and I was silent, wishing to speak but too stupid.
human
No need. You'd have done the same. Don't speak of it now.
gpt
Very well. But----
human
Thou owest me nothing. I've been forced to think of these things--so many hours, Ben, when I--nay, but how could there be any owing or standing beholden between thee and me?
gpt
I think I owe thee everything.
human
No! Pray understand, Ben. It's not a thing to be measured--why, it's not a thing at all, but--oh, like a region one travels through, an area of light.
gpt
Love, a region?
human
What else? Can you own it or give it or take it? It came to me, Ben, that we only dwell in it, as in the sun, or this morning air.