human
Is this, Iris? he asked,
gpt
No, she said;
human
I think you have seen all. In the morning I have my correspondence; in the afternoon I do my sewing, I play a little, I read, or I walk, sometimes by myself, and sometimes with Lala Roy; in the evening I play again, or I read again, or I work at the mathematics, while my grandfather and Lala Roy have their chess. We used to go to the theater sometimes, but of late my grandfather has not gone. At ten we go to bed. That is all my life.
gpt
But, Iris, have you no friends at all, and no relations? Are there no girls of your own age who come to see you?
human
No, not one; I have a cousin, but he is not a good man at all. His father and mother are in Australia. When he comes here, which is very seldom, my grandfather falls ill only with thinking about him and looking at him. But I have no other relations, because, you see, I do not know who my father's people were.
gpt
Then, said Arnold,
human
No said Iris;
gpt
I never think about things impossible.
human
If I were you, I should go about the streets, and walk round the picture-galleries looking for a face like your own. There cannot be many. Let me draw your face, Iris, and then we will send it to the Grosvenor, and label it, 'Wanted, this young lady's cousins.' You must have cousins, if you could only find them out.
gpt
I suppose I must. But what if they should turn out to be rough and disagreeable people?
human
Your cousins could not be disagreeable, Iris,
gpt
One thing I should like, she replied.
human
It would be to find that my cousins, if I have any, are clever people--astronomers, mathematicians, great philosophers, and writers. But what nonsense it is even to talk of such things; I am quite alone, except for my grandfather and Lala Roy.
gpt
And they are old,
human
Do not look at me with such pity, said the girl.
gpt
I am very happy. I have my own occupation; I am independent; I have my work to fill my mind; and I have these two old gentlemen to care for and think of. They have taken so much care of me that I ought to think of nothing else but their comfort; and then there are the books down-stairs--thousands of beautiful old books always within my reach.
human
But you must have some companions, if only to talk and walk with.
gpt
Why, the books are my companions; and then Lala Roy goes for walks with me; and as for talking, I think it is much more pleasant to think.
human
Where do you walk?
gpt
There is Battersea Park; there are the squares; and if you take an omnibus, there are the Gardens and Hyde Park.
human
But never alone, Iris?
gpt
Oh, yes, I am often alone. Why not?
human
I suppose, said Arnold, shirking the question, because this is a civilized country, and in fact, why not?
gpt
I suppose that it is your work which keeps you from feeling life dull and monotonous.
human
No life, she said, looking as wise as Newton, if Newton was ever young and handsome--
gpt
No; I was at Oxford, you know.
human
Then perhaps you prefer metaphysics? Though Lala Roy says that the true metaphysics, which he has tried to teach me, can only be reached by the Hindoo intellect.
gpt
No, indeed; I have never read any metaphysics whatever. I have only got the English intellect.
human
Physical science, perhaps?
gpt
No, Iris. Philosophy, mathematics, physics, metaphysics, or science of any kind have I never learned, except only the science of Heraldry, which you have taught me, with a few other things.
human
Oh! She wondered how a man could exist at all without learning these things.
gpt
Not any science at all? How can any one live without some science?
human
I knew very well, he said,
gpt
Oh, no, not despised. But it seems such a pity--
human
There is another kind of life, Iris, which you do not know. You must let me teach you. It is the life of Art. If you would only condescend to show the least curiosity about me, Iris, I would try to show you something of the Art life.
gpt
How can I show curiosity about you, Arnold? I feel none.
human
No; that is just the thing which shames me. I have felt the most lively curiosity about you, and I have asked you thousands of impertinent questions.
gpt
Not impertinent, Arnold. If you want to ask any more, pray do. I dare say you cannot understand my simple life.
human
And you ask me nothing at all about myself. It isn't fair, Iris.
gpt
Why should I? I know you already.
human
You know nothing at all about me.
gpt
Oh, yes, I know you very well indeed. I knew you before you came here. You showed me yourself in your letters. You are exactly like the portrait I drew of you. I never thought, for instance, that you were an old gentleman, as you thought me.
human
But you do not know what I am, or what is my profession, or anything at all about me.
gpt
No; I do not care to know. All that is not part of yourself. It is outside you.
human
And because you thought you knew me from those letters, you suffer me to come here and be your disciple still? Yet you gave me back my letters?
gpt
That was because they were written to me under a wrong impression.
human
Will you have them back again?
gpt
I know them all by heart,
human
I cannot ask you to read my portrait to me as you drew it from those pictures.
gpt
Why not? She began to read him his portrait as readily as if she were stating the conclusion of a problem.
human
I saw that you were young and full of generous thoughts; sometimes you were indignant with things as they are, but generally you laughed at them and accepted them. It is, it seems, the nature of your friends to laugh a great deal at things which they ought to remedy if they could; not laugh at them. I thought that you wanted some strong stimulus to work; anybody could see that you were a man of kindly nature and good-breeding. You were careful not to offend by anything that you wrote, and I was certain that you were a man of honor. I trusted you, Arnold, before I saw your face, because I knew your soul.
gpt
Trust me still, Iris,
human
Of course I did not know, and never thought, what sort of a man you were to look at. Yet I ought to have known that you were handsome. I should have guessed that from the very tone of your letters. A hunchback or a cripple could not have written in so light-hearted a strain, and I should have discovered, if I had thought of such a thing, that you were very well satisfied with your personal appearance. Young men should always be that, at least, if only to give them confidence.
gpt
Oh, Iris--oh! Do you really think me conceited?
human
I did not say that. I only said that you were satisfied with yourself. That, I understand now, was clear, from many little natural touches in your letters.
gpt
What else did you learn?
human
Oh, a great deal--much more than I can tell you. I knew that you go into society, and I learned from you what society means; and though you tried to be sarcastic, I understood easily that you liked social pleasure.
gpt
Was I sarcastic?
human
Was it not sarcastic to tell me how the fine ladies, who affect so much enthusiasm for art, go to see the galleries on the private-view day, and are never seen in them again? Was it not sarcastic--
gpt
Spare me, Iris. I will never do it again. And knowing so much, do you not desire to know more?
human
No, Arnold. I am not interested in anything else.
gpt
But my position, my profession, my people--are you not curious to know them?
human
No. They are not you. They are accidents of yourself.
gpt
Philosopher! But you must know more about me. I told you I was an artist. But you have never inquired whether I was a great artist or a little one.
human
You are still a little artist, she said.
gpt
I know that, without being told. But perhaps you may become great when you learn to work seriously.
human
I have been lazy, he replied with something like a blush,