human
When you spoke the other day, she said, after the conversation had turned directly on her father's affairs--
gpt
That might do as one definition.
human
Because in that case you may like to know that I think I've seen it.
gpt
I thought you would if you looked for it.
human
I didn't look for it. It was just--there!
gpt
It's always there; only, as in the case of the two disciples on the Emmaus road, our eyes are holden so that we don't see it.
human
I should have seen it easily enough; but if you hadn't told me, I shouldn't have known what it was. I didn't suppose that we got that kind of guidance nowadays.
gpt
The light is always shining in darkness, dearie; only the darkness comprehendeth it not. That's all there is to it.
human
Things _are_ very dark to me, she confessed,
gpt
Of course I couldn't let him do it.
human
Couldn't you?
gpt
Do you think I could?
human
Not if you think differently. You're the only judge.
gpt
But if I don't, you know, papa will have to go-- She hesitated.
human
You know what would happen, don't you?
gpt
I suppose I do.
human
And I could prevent it, you see, if I let papa take this money. I have to assume the responsibility of its refusal. It puts me in a position that I'm beginning to feel--well, rather terrible.
gpt
Does it?
human
You don't seem very much interested, Cousin Rodney. I hoped you'd give me some advice.
gpt
Oh, I never give advice. Besides, if you've got into the Street called Straight, I don't see why you need advice from any one.
human
I do. The Street called Straight is all very well, but--
gpt
Then you're not so sure, after all.
human
I'm sure in a way. If it weren't for papa I shouldn't have any doubt whatever. But it seems so awful for me to drive him into what I don't think he'd do of his own accord. She went on to explain Davenant's offer in detail.
gpt
So you see, she concluded,
human
And you're not going to?
gpt
How could I, Cousin Rodney? How could I put myself under such an obligation to a man I hardly know?
human
He could probably afford it.
gpt
Is he so very rich?
human
Oh, rich enough. It would pretty well clean him out; but, then, that would do him good.
gpt
Do him good--how?
human
He's spoiling for work, that fellow is. Since he's had all that money he's been of no use to himself or to anybody else. He's like good capital tied up in a stocking instead of being profitably invested.
gpt
And yet we could hardly put ourselves in a humiliating situation just to furnish Mr. Davenant with an incentive for occupation, could we, Cousin Rodney?
human
I dare say not.
gpt
And he isn't offering us the money merely for the sake of getting rid of it, do you think?
human
Then what _is_ he offering it to you for?
gpt
That's exactly what I want to know. Haven't you any idea?
human
Haven't you?
gpt
I suppose you never heard that he once asked me to marry him?
human
Who? Peter?
gpt
What the dickens made him do that?
human
I'm sure I can't imagine.
gpt
It isn't a bit like him. You must have led him on.
human
I didn't, she declared, indignantly.
gpt
I never took any notice of him at all. Nothing could have astonished me more than his--his presumption.
human
And what did you say to him? Did you box his ears?
gpt
I was very rude, and that's partly the trouble now. I feel as if he'd been nursing a grudge against me all these years--and was paying it.
human
In that case he's got you on the hip, hasn't he? It's a lovely turning of the tables.
gpt
You see that, Cousin Rodney, don't you? I _couldn't_ let a man like that get the upper hand of me.
human
Of course you couldn't, dear. I'd sit on him if I were you, and sit on him hard. I'd knock him flat--and let Delia Rodman and Clorinda Clay go to the deuce.
gpt
Let--who--go to the deuce?
human
I said Delia Rodman and Clorinda Clay. I might have included Fanny Burnaby and the Brown girls. I meant them, of course. I suppose you've been doing a lot of worrying on their account.
gpt
I--I haven't, she stammered.
human
I haven't thought of them at all.
gpt
Then I wouldn't. They've got no legal claim on you whatever. When they put their money into your father's hands--or when other people put it there for them--they took their chances. Life is full of risks like that. You're not responsible for them, not any more than you are for the fortunes of war. If they've had bad luck, then that's their own lookout. Oh, I shouldn't have them on my mind for a minute.
human
I haven't had them on my mind. It seems queer--and yet I haven't. Now that you speak of them, of course I see-- She passed her hand across her brow. There was a long, meditative silence before she resumed.
gpt
I don't know what I've been dreaming of that it didn't occur to me before. Papa and Mr. Davenant both said that I hadn't considered all the sides to the question; and I suppose that's what they were thinking of. It seems so obvious--now.