human
Well, Julius Cæsar Thornton, this is a serious charge they have lodged against you?
gpt
Yassah, dat's what dey say.
human
You went forth like a man to fight for your country, didn't you?
gpt
Na, sah!
human
How'd you get there?
gpt
Dey volunteered me, sah.
human
Volunteered you, did they?
gpt
Yassah--dat dey did. Dey sho' volunteered me whether er no----
human
And how did it happen?
gpt
Dey done hit so quick, sah, I scacely know how dey did do hit. I was in de war down in Virginia wid Marse John Vaughan--an' er low-lifed Irishman on guard dar put me ter wuk er buryin' corpses. I hain't nebber had no taste for corpses nohow, an' I didn't like de job--mo' specially, sah, when one ob 'em come to ez I was pullin' him froo de dark ter de grave----
human
Come to, did he?
gpt
Yassah--he come to all of er sudden an' kicked me! An' hit scared me near 'bout ter death. I lit out fum dar purty quick, sah, an' go West. An' I ain't mor'n got out dar 'fore two fellers drawed dere muskets on me an' persuaded me ter volunteer, sah. Dey put dese here cloze on me an' tell me dat I wuz er hero. I tell 'em dey must be some mistake 'bout dat, but dey say no--dey know what dey wuz er doin'. Dey keep on tellin' me dat I wuz er hero an', by golly, I 'gin ter b'lieve hit myself till dey git me into trouble, sah.
human
You were in a battle?
gpt
I had er little taste ob it, sah,----
human
Well, you tried to fight, didn't you?
gpt
No, sah,--I run.
human
Ran at the first fire?
gpt
Yas, _sah_! An' I'd a ran sooner ef I'd er known hit wuz comin'----
human
Dey git one pop at me, sah, 'fore I seed what dey wuz doin'!
gpt
That wasn't very creditable to your courage.
human
Dat ain't in my line, sah,--I'se er cook.
gpt
Have you no regard for your reputation?
human
Dat ain't nuttin' ter me, sah, 'side er life!
gpt
And your life is worth more than other people's?
human
Worth er lot mo' ter me, sah.
gpt
I'm afraid they wouldn't have missed you, Julius, if you'd been killed.
human
Na, sah, but I'd a sho missed myself an' dat's de pint wid me.
gpt
It's sweet and honorable to die for one's country, Julius!
human
Yassah--dat's what I hear--but I ain't fond er sweet things--I ain't nebber hab no taste fer 'em, sah!
gpt
Well, it looks like I'll have to let 'em have you, Julius, for an example. I've tried to save you--but there doesn't seem to be any thing to take hold of. Every time I grab you, you slip right through my fingers. I reckon they'll have to shoot you----
human
G'way fum here, Mr. President! You can't fool me, sah. I sees yer laughin' right now way back dar in yo' eyes. You ain't gwine let 'em shoot me. I'se too vallable a nigger fer dat. I wuz worth er thousan' dollars 'fore de war. I sho' oughter be wuth two thousan' now. What's de use er 'stroyin' er good piece er property lak dat? I won't be no good ter nobody ef dey shoots me!