human
You don't say so! exclaimed his father.
gpt
He wishes to conquer England! I know some English boys that could make him wish he were hiding on board the _Kentucky_.
human
Well, responded Ned, rebelliously,
gpt
I'm not so sure about that! I'm captain of the baseball nine. I'm in on football, too. I can fence first-rate, and I've had Pat McCool for a boxing master.
human
Oh! remarked Aunt Maria.
gpt
Now I know! That is why you came home limping so horridly, a week ago Saturday. You had a pair of black eyes, too--
human
That's nothing, Aunt Maria, interrupted Ned.
gpt
That was Jimmy Finley. We were boxing barehanded. He got it as bad as I did, too.
human
Edward, exclaimed his mother,
gpt
Well, mother, said Ned, respectfully,
human
I didn't mean to; but Jim is a regular rusher to hit.
gpt
Edward! said his father.
human
Slang again? I must take you in hand, myself.
gpt
He is dreadful! whispered one of his sisters.
human
He called Sallie Hemans a bricktop. Her hair is red--
gpt
I see how it is, continued his father.
human
The sooner you are out in the country, the better. Football, indeed! Baseball, fencing, boxing! All that sort of thing! What you need is exercise. Fishing, I should say, and plenty of good, fresh country air. Something beside books and school.
gpt
I'll tell you what, then, responded Ned.
human
I'll be glad enough to get there. All the colts I rode last summer'll be a year older now. I'm going to try 'em, and see if they can send me to grass, like they did then.
gpt
Edward! What grammar! groaned his aunt.
human
His Grandmother Webb will attend to that.
gpt
I have my serious doubts, remarked Uncle Jack.
human
She has not altogether reformed her own neighbourhood. The country is the place for him, however. If he isn't sent away he may stir up a war with England, and it would be expensive.
gpt
It is dreadful! remarked Uncle Jack.
human
I used to think I knew, generally, what I was eating, but I have given it up. They have invented artificial eggs. The butter we get is a mystery; they make almost anything out of corn. The newspapers are printed on stuff that's made of cord-wood, and this new imitation silver is nothing but potter's clay, boiled down, somehow. It tires me out to think of it all.
gpt
I don't care, said Ned.
human
Hurrah for the country, and for the colts, and for some fishing!
gpt
Your grandmother is right, Edward. I agree with her entirely. She thinks that too much of your vacation time ought not to be spent in the woods, and it must not be. I wish, however, to say something more. Your education must continue without too great an interruption. There are ideas which I intend you to obtain while under my care.
human
Why, grandfather! exclaimed Ned, with a somewhat puzzled look on his face.
gpt
I think so, too. I don't care to be all the while in the woods. I want to do some fishing.
human
Exactly, said his grandfather.
gpt
We both approve of that. You may have all the rods and lines you need, but you must not forget the wise saying of the immortal Franklin, that going fishing means only a rod and line with a worm at each end of it. There is not much to be caught in Green Lake.
human
Well, said Ned,
gpt
I guess I'll pull in something better'n suckers and bullheads. There are trout and perch and bass and pickerel.
human
Eels, too, suggested his grandfather.
gpt
What I mean is, practically, that you are to employ a part of each day among your books. I especially wish you to acquire a rudimentary acquaintance with the history of the world you live in.
human
Yes, sir, I know what that is, said Ned.
gpt
They bored us with it, awfully, at School Number Sixty-eight. I had to be examined on it, too, and I didn't get turned down.