human
Why?
gpt
Better than cuttin' the end off, explained the dummy-chucker.
human
It's a good smoke,
gpt
You know tobacco, said his host.
human
Where did you learn?
gpt
Oh, we all have our ups and downs, replied the dummy-chucker.
human
But don't get nervous. I ain't goin' to tell you that I was a millionaire's son, educated at Harvard. I'm a bum.
gpt
Doesn't seem to bother you,
human
It don't, asserted the dummy-chucker.
gpt
Except when the police butt into my game. I just got off Blackwell's Island this morning.
human
And almost went back this afternoon.
gpt
Almost, he said. His eyes wandered around the room.
human
he stated. Then his manner became business-like.
gpt
You mentioned a hundred dollars--what for?
human
Not hard work. You merely have to look like a gentleman, and act like----
gpt
Like a bum?
human
Well, something like that.
gpt
Shoot! he said.
human
Anything short of murder--_anything_, friend.
gpt
There's a girl--
human
There always is, he interrupted.
gpt
I forgot to mention that I bar kidnaping, too.
human
It's barred, said the young man. He hitched his chair a trifle nearer his guest.
gpt
She's beautiful. She's young.
human
And the money? The coin? The good red gold?
gpt
I have enough for two. I don't care about her money.
human
Neither do I, said the dummy-chucker;
gpt
About a year ago, resumed the host,
human
Call him any darned thing you like,
gpt
Jones was a drunkard,
human
And she married him?
gpt
No. She told him that if he'd quit drinking she'd marry him. She stipulated that he go without drink for one year.
human
Jones, continued the young man,
gpt
A game guy, commented the dummy-chucker.
human
Well, what happened?
gpt
He died of jungle-fever two months ago, was the answer.
human
The news just reached Rio Janeiro yesterday.
gpt
To a regular feller, he said, and drank. He set his glass down gently.
human
And the girl? I suppose she's all shot to pieces?
gpt
She doesn't know,
human
I begin to get you, he said.
gpt
I'm the messenger from Brazil who breaks the sad news to her, eh?
human
The news isn't to be broken to her--not yet. You see--well, I was Jones' closest friend. He left his will with me, his personal effects, and all that. So I'm the one that received the wire of his death. In a month or so, of course, it will be published in the newspapers--when letters have come from the explorers. But, just now, I'm the only one that knows it.
gpt
Except me,
human
Except you. And you won't tell. Ever wear evening clothes?
gpt
Oh, yes; when I was at Princeton. What's the idea?
human
Well, with a shave, and a hair-cut, and a manicure, and the proper clothing, and the right setting--well, if a person had only a quick glance--that person might think you were Jones.
gpt
I guess I'm pretty stupid to-night. I still don't see it.
human
You will, asserted his host.
gpt
You see, she's a girl who's seen a great deal of the evil of drink. She has a horror of it. If she thought that Jones had broken his pledge to her, she'd throw him over.
human
She doesn't know that,
gpt
Why don't you tell her?
human
Because I want to marry her.
gpt
Well, I should think the quickest way to get her would be to tell her about Jones----
human
You don't happen to know the girl, interrupted the other.
gpt
She's a girl of remarkable conscience. If I should tell her that Jones died in Brazil, she'd enshrine him in her memory. He'd be a hero who had died upon the battle-field. More than that--he'd be a hero who had died upon the battle-field in a war to which she had sent him. His death would be upon her soul. Her only expiation would be to be faithful to him forever.
human
I won't argue about it, said the dummy-chucker.
gpt
I don't know her. Only--I guess your whisky has got me. I don't see it at all.
human
She's going to the opera to-night with her parents. But, before she goes, she's going to dine with me at the Park Square. Suppose, while she's there, Jones should come in. Suppose that he should come in reeling, noisy, _drunk_! She'd marry me to-morrow.
gpt
I'll take your word for it, said the dummy-chucker.
human
Only, when she's learned that Jones had died two months ago in Brazil----
gpt
She'll be married to me then, responded the other fiercely.
human
What I get, I can hold. If she were Jones' wife, I'd tell her of his death. I'd know that, sooner or later, I'd win her. But if she learns now that he died while struggling to make himself worthy of her, she'll never give to another man what she withheld from him.
gpt
I see, said the dummy-chucker slowly.
human
And you want me to----
gpt
There'll be a table by the door in the main dining-room engaged in Jones' name. You'll walk in there at a quarter to eight. You'll wear Jones' dinner clothes. I have them here. You'll wear the studs that he wore, his cuff-links. More than that, you'll set down upon the table, with a flourish, his monogrammed flask. You'll be drunk, noisy, disgraceful----
human
How long will I be all that--in the hotel?