human
All right, he concluded.
gpt
You go. It's Lombard Street to a china orange you'll never get there, and, if you do, you'll never get back. None of the band'll turn up, and if you find twenty other fools in the building to exchange colds with, you'll be lucky. To leave your home on a night like this is fairly clamouring for the special brand of trouble they keep for paralytic idiots. I've known you all too long to expect sagacity, but the instinct of self-preservation characterizes even the lower animals. What swine, for instance, would leave its cosy sty----
human
How dare you? said Daphne.
gpt
Besides, you can't say 'its.' Swine's plural.
human
My reference was to the fever-swine, was the cold reply.
gpt
A singular species. Comparable only with the deep-sea dip-sheep.
human
I think you're very unkind, said Jill, pouting.
gpt
Boy can walk in front with a lamp, and Jonah can walk behind with a lamp----
human
And I can walk on both sides, I suppose, with a brazier in either hand. Oh, this is too easy.
gpt
We can but try,
human
You can but close your ugly head, said Berry.
gpt
If you want to walk about London half the night, looking like a demobilised pantaloon, push off and do it. But don't try and rope in innocent parties.
human
There's no reason, said Jonah,
gpt
Is that the Club?
human
No, said I.
gpt
Nothing like it.
human
Well, there's a bag of mine in the hall, and----
gpt
No, there isn't,
human
What d'you mean?
gpt
What I say. Our hall is bagless.
human
I say, said the voice with laboured clarity,
gpt
I say there is a bag in the hall. A BAG. Hang it all, you know what a bag is?
human
Rather, said I heartily.
gpt
What you put nuts in. An uncle of mine had one.
human
Can you get to the Albert Hall to-night, Fitch?
gpt
I think so, madam. If we go slow.
human
Can you get back from the Albert Hall to-morrow afternoon?
gpt
If I can get there, sir, I can get back.
human
How long will it take?
gpt
I ought to do it in 'alf an hour, sir. I can push along in the Park, where it's all straight going. It's getting along the streets as'll take the time. It's not that I won't find me way, but it's the watchin' out for the hother vehicles, so as they don't run into you.
human
Bit of an optimist, aren't you?
gpt
I don't think so, sir.
human
Thank you, Fitch, said Daphne hastily.
gpt
Half-past nine, please.
human
Very good, madam.
gpt
At making a mountain out of a molehill, she said,