human
Isn't it perfect? said Barbara, after a time.
gpt
I feel that this is the best that life has to offer, Dad. I wonder how much of that feeling is due to being rested and fed, after having been rather tired and rather hungry.
human
I should think about half,
gpt
That only leaves half for the scenery, and the lovely air and the sunshine, and _not_ being in Paris, and being with you, and looking forward to going home as the next thing. It isn't enough.
human
And it leaves nothing at all for being young, and having nothing on your mind; nothing at all to worry yourself about. That's the great advantage of being young, which you never realise till you're no longer young. When something good comes along, like this, you can enjoy it to the full.
gpt
You've got nothing to worry you now, have you, Dad?
human
No, darling, he said, after another.
gpt
The way is pretty clear ahead now. Lots of jolly things to be done and some quite nice people to take an interest in. You and I will be able to do some of the nice things together, won't we?
human
It will be lovely, she said.
gpt
We're doing one of the nice things now. It was rather a good move, our coming here together, wasn't it, Dad?
human
Yes, a first-class move. Do you ever read Wordsworth, Barbara?
gpt
Not more than I'm obliged, darling. I've read about the tiresome child who couldn't count, and he nagged at her.
human
I don't mean that sort of Wordsworth. Mother loved him. She read me things when we were on our honeymoon, going to beautiful places together.
gpt
Then I should like to read him. What sort of things?
human
He makes you see how beautiful Nature is: I can't explain it exactly, but if you take it right it has a sort of soothing uplifting influence on you.
gpt
Yes, I've felt that sometimes, especially since we went to live at Abington. But--perhaps it's because I'm too young--I don't think you can enjoy it so much alone.
human
Have you found that out already? he said.
gpt
I found it out after Mother died. I was frightfully unhappy. I went away by myself to some of the places we'd been to together. But it made me unhappier still. In fact, it spoilt the memory of those places for me till I went there again years afterwards, with Cara and B. Then I got back my first impression of them.
human
Take me to them, sometime, Daddy,
gpt
Yes, I will, darling. You were too young then. I think perhaps we might go this autumn. It was in September that she and I were married. How happy we were! She had planned out where we were to go to. Mostly out-of-the-way beautiful places. I suppose I had been too busy amusing myself, with other people, to want to go to places simply because they were beautiful, before. But she taught me to love the beauty of Nature, though for a time after she died it did nothing for me.
human
Perhaps it doesn't when you're unhappy and alone. Do you think Caroline loves it in the same way as Mother did, Daddy?
gpt
She gets it from her, I suppose, he said.
human
Perhaps she has it even more strongly. She's going to make it the chief thing in her life, you know, she and Maurice together. And one doesn't feel that she is wrong in doing it.
gpt
Of course, she has tried the other,
human
Are you thinking that it wouldn't be enough for you? he asked.
gpt
I don't think it would, darling; it wouldn't have been enough for Mother and me--a refreshment--perhaps the best sort of refreshment, while we were young, and something to come to more and more if we had grown old together. At any rate, you'll have your taste of pleasure, as Cara and B had it, and you'll be right to enjoy it, as they did. It did neither of them any harm and it won't do you any harm.
human
Why should it do anybody harm, Dad?
gpt
Oh, well--if pleasure were put in the first place, for the whole of a lifetime! That's what you see all round you, among people of our sort. It would have been more of a danger for B than for Caroline. But B is all right now. She'll make a good loving wife and mother. She'll have a good time, but she won't put having a good time first.
human
I should like you to expound that for me a little, Daddy; for my good, you know.
gpt
Well, I don't know that I'm the best person to expound it to you, except perhaps that I've done it a bit too much myself. You see when you have enough money to do pretty well what you like, you do rather get into the way of gratifying yourself at every turn--or trying to. Even the good things in life--love is the best of them all--you're apt to think more of yourself than of other people--even of the very people you love.
human
I'm not sure that the best thing for a man isn't to have something stiff to do, he went on.
gpt
I never have had. I've been too lucky.
human
You've made all of us happy, darling.
gpt
Well, that's something, isn't it, if I have? You've all made me happy too. Best not to be always looking out for happiness for yourself--much less pleasure. Some clever fellow said once that happiness only came when you weren't looking for it.
human
I think the best thing is to do what you can to make other people happy. I don't mean in a priggish sort of way--setting yourself out to do it--but because you love them and it comes natural to you to want to.
gpt
I believe you've hit upon the whole duty of women, darling. It's what they are here for. A selfish woman always seems more off the lines than a selfish man. But selfishness is ugly everywhere. You can't always see it in yourself, but when you do you had better get rid of it as quickly as possible.
human
You're not selfish.
gpt
Most men are. I don't think I'm much different from other fellows. But I like you to think I am.
human
You know, Daddy, I've been thinking lately that it's rather like what you said just now--you mustn't grab at things, and it may not be altogether good for you to be able to get everything you want. By far the nicest of the girls you sent me to Paris to consort with is Nora O'Brien, whom I told you about. Her people are very hard up, and one of her aunts is educating her. The others are all rich--at least their people are--and the richest are the horridest, except Katie Brown, whose father is a millionaire; and she laughs at it, and would be just as happy if he were poor. I think _we_ are all so nice because we really love each other, and that's the best of all the things we have at home; though it's very jolly having a beautiful house and lots of friends too.
gpt
Yes, it's love that makes the world go round, wherever you find it. It gives you a reason for enjoying yourself too. At least it does when you've a young woman of nearly eighteen, soon to be launched on the world. I hope you'll enjoy yourself, darling, when it comes to the time for you to go out and about.
human
I shall like best being at home with you, Daddy.
gpt
Well, you'll be at home a lot too, I hope. But you must have your fling, and see what the world is like all round.
human
I think I shall like it, you know. Caroline did, though she got tired of it afterwards.
gpt
I don't think it was so much that she got tired of it as that she found something else she liked better to put in its place. Oh, I'm happy about Caroline and B both. And about you too, darling. And about Bunting, who is growing into a very good sort of man. In fact I've nothing to grouse about at all, except that I can't have the last five and twenty years all over again. Now I think it's time to be getting down to our happy valley.