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Home » Articles » Special Sections »  Humor
 
Monday, April 1,2013
Humor

Humor Issue 2013

Each year The Athens NEWS produces a satirical special section: The HUMOR Issue. This year's lead covers those meddlesome urban chickens. To read the digital edition of this story along with the rest of the HUMOR special section, click here.
Monday, April 1,2013
Humor

County paralyzed with fear as girl won’t leave playground

Athens County plunged into more than five hours of shuddering, white-knuckle panic Saturday afternoon, after a 6-year-old girl at the Albany Community Park, reportedly seeking to draw attention to what she called the unfair monopolization of the slide by “stinky big boys,” announced that she had locked herself to the swing set and would never, ever leave.
Monday, April 1,2013
Humor

‘Urban chickens’ plan 1st annual “Buk Buk Buk Fest”

Barely a month after Athens City Council voted to loosen restrictions on allowing chickens inside city limits, chickens living in a near east-side neighborhood have announced plans to hold a "totally squawkin'" spring block party next weekend in the Hudson-Elmwood area.
Monday, April 1,2013
Humor

City of Athens attempts coup d’état over Athens County

‘I don’t understand; I don’t understand,’ one county official declared way too much

Teeming hordes of Athens city officials and employees stormed county offices early Friday morning declaring political sovereignty over all of Athens County.
Monday, April 1,2013
Humor

OU Trustees explore ‘sugar daddies’ as potential funding source

If you believe this, you'll believe anything

In the wake of news reports suggesting that a growing number of financially strapped female college students are hooking up with "sugar daddies" to help pay their bills, Ohio University officials last week announced a new program to cultivate affluent, libidinous middle-aged men as financial donors, by placing selected students in internships to serve as their concubines.
Monday, April 1,2013
Humor

OU student claims infidelity due to continued economic turmoil

Ohio University senior Erich Mannowitzy is sticking to his story that he forgot his girlfriend's birthday and slept with her cousin because he's mad about the economy.
Monday, April 1,2013
Humor

North Korean nut-job tabs dear, lovable A-town for military strike

North Korean leader Kim Jong-un issued a statement on Thursday identifying Athens County as a primary target for an imminent military strike by North Korean forces.
Monday, April 1,2013
Humor

Athens code inspectors get the ‘Deliverance’ routine after trying to enforce 20-mile fracking zone

No, not THAT ‘Deliverance’ routine!

Athens Police on Saturday arrested two men found wandering naked, covered in oil and muttering incoherently, on the city's north side. Police soon released them, however, after realizing they were city code inspectors sent into the county's rural back-country to enforce the city's 20-mile fracking ban.
Monday, April 1,2013
Humor

OU president reveals hidden budget

Ohio University President Roderick McDervish revealed some shocking aspects of the university's budget in a public presentation on Thursday, revealing that one-third of the current budget goes toward concealing the rest of the university's expenditures.
Tuesday, March 27,2012
Humor

Humor Issue 2012

Each year The Athens NEWS produces the eagerly awaiteds satirical special section the HUMOR issue. This year's lead covers the popular topic of fracking. To read the digital edition of this story along with the rest of the HUMOR special section, click here.
 
 
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