5 Reasons Why These Lists are Stupid as Fuck

Posted on 23 November 2013

We have all seen it. The new fad that every website and their mother decided was the bees knees on social media. Every article ever posted is a list of some extremely important information that needs to be read. The topics are wide and varied, but the delivery never changes. Lists, lists, and more lists. All day, every day. It's been months of this. Will there ever be an end?

Although I admit that many of these articles are humorous, clever and funny... they are annoying the shit out of me. Without further a due...

Here are the top 5 reasons why these "top reasons lists" are stupid as fuck.

1 - No One Cares About Your Cats

I for one happen to like cats. I like their independence, and their attitude. However, dogs are better and frankly, no one cares about you and your cat. Yes... we get it. You have an iphone, with a camera. Your cat has fur, and curls in a little ball when it sleeps. We knew that before you took 5000 pictures of your cat. I dont need 24 more reasons why your cat is so cute. In fact, I dont even need one reason. It's a cat. Not a lion... we get it.


2 - You are not buzzfeed.

For those of you who don't know... buzzfeed.com designed their entire content management scheme by making these lists. They were the first, they built an online empire by doing it. If I were buzzfeed I would be really pissed. Everyone took your great idea, and ruined it. I used to really enjoy buzzfeed. There was a time when I loved learning about the 41 reasons why ice cream is amazing, or the 23 reasons why I am emotionally unavailable. Now I see these articles, and I just shake my head. Sorry buzzfeed, these guys really ruined a good thing you had going.

3 - You are just making shit up.

I saw an article the other day entitled "13 reasons why New Jersey is the best state." You have got to be fucking kidding me. Really??? Look people, I am from Philadelphia. I completely understand what it is like to have a large unjustified, arrogant and overwhelming pride in where you came from. But Jersey??? It was just the most outlandish shit I have ever read. Someone from Cherry Hill got stoned, and decided to make up things about Jersey to make themselves feel better. Maybe 10% of these lists are backed my credible sources. At this very moment, I am making this list up, right off the top of my head. Think about it... 

4 - You are clogging up our news feeds

Let's get right too it. Facebook has a few purposes. I use it to read about news, stalk people, and look at pictures. These lists are hindering my daily routine. I am a creature of habit... it must end.

5 - It's just over.

Ok get serious for a minute. I love a good fad. I am an internet marketer by trade. The internet has tons of trends and new topics. From old Facebook pokes, to grumpy cat memes, to Vines to Instagram vids. I appreciate the lists for what they were, and now they are just getting old.

Let's come together, get creative, and think of a new idea that we can play out in a few months. Truth be told, some of these lists are very good. I do feel bad for buzzfeed though since their idea got totally jacked and stolen by well... everyone. Even so, the fad is over. We had our fun. Let's move on. I know change is hard, but here are some cute puppies to make you feel better.

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