SCP-2654 - The good stuff http://www.scp-wiki.net/forum/t-2267285/scp-2654-the-good-stuff Posts in the discussion thread "SCP-2654 - The good stuff" - Looking for a quick fix? Then this shifty entity is for you Thu, 18 Jul 2019 20:11:41 +0000 http://www.scp-wiki.net/forum/t-2267285#post-2815209 Re: SCP-2654 - The good stuff http://www.scp-wiki.net/forum/t-2267285/scp-2654-the-good-stuff#post-2815209 Tue, 09 May 2017 07:59:23 +0000 Zyn 1404533 Right. This is a fastcrit, since there's a lot on the forums with no replies. Standard disclaimer: it is late and I am tired, and I am always rather hard to impress.

Overall impression:

I kind of skimmed this up until the "7 classified as SCP and 1 [REDACTED]." bit. The redaction feels like a cop-out since there's not enough contextual info for the reader to fill in the blank themselves, and the fact that this thing is apparently responsible for generating seven other SCP objects just seems like a lame attempt to make this seem more interesting than it would be on its own merit as a singular object.

Personally, I thought of the Crack Genie and the one SCP dude that makes exchanges for things, and the input/output thing you've got here… doesn't really seem unique enough to carry itself as a new article. The best part of this, I think, is the utterly strange manifestation requirements and the fact that the anomaly occurs in a public bathroom stall, of all places. Keep that, but I think the rest needs to be changed up so as to not seem derivative of all the extant similar articles.

I recommend getting the base idea polished up in the Ideas and Brainstorming forum before you try fixing the draft. Go to that forum, post a quick summary of the concept you want to write up (don't link the draft unless someone asks), and reviewers there can help you make the idea more interesting and give you some advice on structuring the eventual article for smoothness of reading and narrative.

Some (not all) specifics:

  • Casual language like "24/7" shouldn't be in professional-sounding documents.
  • You don't need to specify that containment is in place "all the time" anyway, since… why wouldn't it be?
  • if this Dr. Nakamura person is absent for some reason, is the Foundation screwed? Why not give a title rather than one specific person?
  • Level-2 uses a hyphen I think.
  • Description does not actually give location of the anomaly. Does it affect all "third of five stalls in the bathroom of an old fashioned service area"?
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http://www.scp-wiki.net/forum/t-2267285#post-2813299 SCP-2654 - The good stuff http://www.scp-wiki.net/forum/t-2267285/scp-2654-the-good-stuff#post-2813299 Sun, 07 May 2017 08:19:19 +0000 8mike 3032300 Hello everyone, thanks for welcoming me in the Foundation. This is my first SCP.
http://scpsandbox2.wikidot.com/the-good-stuff

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