
Barton: 50 shades of green

One of the surest ways to get people talking about something is to ban it.

Last week, the library system in Gwinnett County said it won’t be carrying the racy romance novel, “50 Shades of Grey,” the so-called mommy porn book that Saturday Night Live thought would be a nifty gift for Mother’s Day today.

But bookstore chains seem to be moving copies. A store at the Oglethorpe Mall has stacks near the front and the café.

A clerk told me that she has fielded breathless phone calls from women buyers, who send their husbands inside to purchase copies because they are too embarrassed. “The husbands are quick to point out that they’re buying it for their wives, not for themselves,” she said.

I’m no book critic. But I flipped through a few pages, and it’s hardly Steinbeck or Hemingway. Or “Lady Chatterley’s Lover.”

However, “Shades” has sold a whopping 3 million copies. That’s a lot of green, not grey.

It’s hard to argue against success. But not all women are on the same literary wavelength.

I asked a friend who’s a mom whether her book club will read “Shades.” She doubted it. But she did say she almost checked it out at a local library branch, where it was displayed as “new fiction.”

“I noticed the title and it didn’t interest me,” she said. “At the time, I thought it had something to do with interior decorating.”

Bronco-busted

Please flag Tim Tebow for unsportsmanlike conduct for changing the name of his faithful, canine companion.

This is a pitiful tale. It seems the former quarterback for the Florida Gators and the NFL’s Denver Broncos has had a dog named Bronco. Thus when Tebow called his pooch to play fetch, he would say something like, “Here, Bronco. Go get it, Bronco. Good, Bronco.”

Tebow will play for the New York Jets this season. So what does he do? He changes Bronco’s name. To Bronx.

Pfthththt... You don’t change a dog’s name like you do a uniform. Besides, the Jets don’t play in New York. They play in New Jersey.

Bronco should keep the name he’s used to. Tebow, however, should change his name to Mike the Situation. Or Snooki.

Man in the middle

So the U.S. Chamber of Commerce has endorsed Congressman John Barrow. Surprising? Nope.

The former Savannah Democrat, who used to be an Athens Democrat but is now an Augusta Democrat, is a flaming moderate who has hugged more center lines than a DOT road-striping machine. His district is evenly split between Democrats and Republicans. So before he votes, he can’t just check which way the wind is blowing and follow along.

He has to think.

That’s what’s shocking — there’s at least one thinking congressman in the House.

If fewer lawmakers had safe seats — ones that weren’t heavily Democratic or Republican — maybe more congressmen would act like thinkers. Not wind socks.

Tom Barton is the editorial page editor of the Savannah Morning News.

tom.barton@savannahnow.com.

will be playing for the New York Jets this season

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