Hourglass&nbsp;Veil Mineral Primer, .33 oz, $18, Sephora.com.
What is happening to those with whom I associate, hm? &nbsp;Am I that much of a Jewish nag that I have driven each of them to the bottle, now forcing them to detox? &nbsp;Today marks another loss. &nbsp;I received a text which read, &amp;#8220;I&amp;#8217;m cutting out alcohol.&amp;#8221; &nbsp;WHY?! &nbsp;How are we supposed to tolerate &amp;#8220;3 buttons undone&amp;#8221; men without it? &nbsp;There is no other way!As I have told these dummies and will now share with you - cutting anything out of your daily regimen is just bad, bad, bad for business. &nbsp;Throws the whole factory into an assembly line of chaotic proportions&amp;#8230; knowwhatimean? &nbsp;So&amp;#8230; Bacon? &nbsp;Get&amp;#8217;s the intestinal juices a flown&amp;#8217;! &nbsp;Alcohol? &nbsp;God&amp;#8217;s Xanax. &nbsp;Yoga? &nbsp;Gives you time to obsess over &amp;#8220;his&amp;#8221; last text. &nbsp;Deviate from this finely tuned system and you&amp;#8217;ll wind up like me in June&amp;#8230; DUSTY! &nbsp;You know what I&amp;#8217;m talkin&amp;#8217; &amp;#8216;bout. &nbsp;So keep that IV you&amp;#8217;ve been using for your daily dose of Starbucks right in place &amp;amp; remember that there is a solution for every problem. &nbsp;Just ask Mitt Romney! &nbsp;
&amp;#8220;But I&amp;#8217;m broken out, blotchy, AND dehydrated!&amp;#8221; &nbsp;Yes, so clearly then alcohol is the culprit. &nbsp;How dare you! &nbsp;I am insulted at the accusation! &nbsp;Well&amp;#8230; alcohol may exacerbate some of the previously discussed ailments. &nbsp;But just do what I do to avoid such hullabaloo - throw a primer on that greasy face ya silly bitch! &nbsp;Instead of making things harder for yourself by avoiding the sweet, sweet nectar of the gods,&nbsp;a makeup primer will prevent&nbsp;clogging your pores with all that gunk you throw on to fix that&amp;#8230; situation. &nbsp;
Hourglass&amp;#8217;s&nbsp;&amp;#8221;Veil Mineral Primer&amp;#8221; is very unlike other clear primers I have tried. &nbsp;To start, it&amp;#8217;s white&amp;#8230; like moisturizer&amp;#8230; ooooooh! &nbsp;And with just half a pump (NOT THAT KIND) it moisturizes my combination skin but feels sheer and silky (what sexy verbage!). &nbsp;After application it is instantly absorbed, and then I&amp;#8217;m ready to get back to&nbsp;tricking people into thinking I&amp;#8217;m really, really good-looking.