I'm sorry, but I expect a memoir to be TRUE.
930916
Her mother was a poor girl from England, tricked into marrying a retarded man, and then abandoned the family to lead a secular life. Poor Deborah was left with her grandparents; a callous old patriarch, and his long-suffering wife. This poor child was pushed to marry a guy she'd known for a week, and he turned out to be impotent in bed and impotent as a husband and father. What a tragedy. What an even bigger sham!

When I read the info on "Deborah Feldman" I was a bit suspicious. She says she and her son live in NYC and goes to college, but how does she do that on her limited income? It's very expensive to live in this city, unless her ex-husband is paying all her bills. The second red flag I saw was her TV interview with Barbara Walters. Feldman speak English unaccented, which contradicts what she says about her life. If she'd grown up speaking Yiddish only, how did she become fluent in English so fast? When I see ex-Hasids interviewed on TV, they always have the accent.

My research told me the real story of this author:
1. Her real name is Suri Berkowicz.
2. She has a younger sister, not mentioned in the book.
3. Her parents split up when she was a teenager, her mother did not abandon her as an infant.
4. She went to a non-Hasid girls school, and they were not taught only in Yiddish.
5. Her mother took her and her sister to the library all the time, so book were not "forbidden."

I don't know what's going through this woman's head. Maybe she figured she could write some kind of "misery lit" and pass it off as non-fiction? Maybe she heard of the scandal with "Love and Consequences" and figured she could do a better job at bull***ting everyone? Leah Vincent's "Cut Me Loose" wasn't true either, so these "I was raised in a sexist misogynistic Hasidic Jewish cult and narrowly escaped with my sanity" memoirs are going to be a thing of the future.

"Feldman" should just sell the rights to the story and have it turned into an action movie, where she escapes by bashing the wicked Rabbi's head with a Menorah. Or maybe her boyfriend, whose already escaped, will come back to rescue her, just like Benjamin Braddock does in The Graduate. I can just see him smashing his way into the Synagogue, kicking the leering, hook-nosed groom in the balls, and holding off the crowd of evil black-clad henchmen with a star of David. The Jewish symbol is a lethal weapon, you know. It has six sharp points.

I'll give Feldman two stars, because if there's one thing I do admire, it's a book that sells. Well done Deb (or Suri, if you prefer).
3222583
If it is autobiographical, as I believed it to be when I read it, it is a very sad and also uplifting read.  If it is fictional, it is a waste of time and empathy. If anyone knows if the debate over its authenticity is settled, please put your two cents in and I'll be happy to be enlightened.
3237232
this would be a nice piece of fiction.  as a person aquainted with the facts, i am sorry that the whole story has not been presented fairly and objectively.
3589262
I expected more.  It came off as more of a lecture than a story.
3899960
If it ends how I expect I'm going to be very disappointed. I hope I'm wrong, but it seems to be dragging on.
3017053
I have been an admirer of Ariel Dorfman's public life and career; his efforts as a witness against tyranny and the evils of dictatorship are known and significant; his public witness (especially in Death and the Maiden) deserve respect.  So I approached this memoir with great curiosity and expected to be fascinated and enlightened.  Unfortunately, though there is much of real interest in the memoir, the prose style is flat and the narrative (including the exploration of Dorfman's inner life) simply lacks the energy to sustain interest. There is no question that the events of his life, and the pain and injustice that he has suffered, are intrinsically dramatic and of interest, but for some reason, the plodding manner of his retelling works against the desired effect, and I finally found that though I would recommend the book to anyone interested in the history of resistance to injustice in our time, I would have to qualify that by admitting that the book lacks the literary values needed to make it a great memoir.  (As points of comparison, to indicate the standard by which I reach this conclusion, I would mention Nadezhda Mandelstam's
Hope Against Hope, Primo Levi's Survival in Auschwitz, or Bruce Chatwin's Songlines as examples of great memoirs.)
2972819
I am looking forward to reading this book.  My beloved mother was was a slave laborer in Skarzysko.  I am positive that the living conditions in the camp can be attributed to her development of esophageal cancer.  I was never able to discuss my mother's holocaust experience with her.  I do not think I could cope with her stories.
3571899
3.25 Stars* (rounded down)

Its Not Yet Dark is a memoir written by Simon Fitzmaurice, an Irish Film Maker, who was diagnosed with MND (Motor Neuron Disease a/k/a ALS (Amyotrophic Lateral Sclerosis) a/k/a Lou Gehrigs Disease) at the age of 34.  At the time of diagnosis, he was given 4 years to live.  Yet he had hope.  And he believed in the power of love.

<blockquote>For me, it is not about how long you live, but about how you live.

I am not a tragedy.  I neither want nor need pity.  I am full of hope.  The word hope and ALS do not go together in this country.  Hope is not about looking for a cure to a disease.  Hope is a way of living.  We often think we are entitled to a long fruitful Coca-Cola life.  But life is a privilege, not a right.  I feel privileged to be alive.  Thats hope. </blockquote>

Mr. Fitzmaurices memoir advocates for a person with this disease to make the choices for themselves; he chose to live.  Unfortunately, in each country, the choices a person can make are different.  This I know.

Its Not Yet Dark is a memoir that tells you what happened to Simon Fitzmaurice, it doesnt show you, nor does it evoke emotion from its reader, in my opinion.  I admit that I held off reading this novel for months as I was afraid of the reaction that I would have.  However, the writing felt somewhat stilted, cold and unemotional to me and I was expecting the exact opposite and I thought reading it would destroy me.

Sadly, I have lost two relatives to MND/ALS, which is unspeakable: my My Uncle, Edward Lightowlers, who passed away in July of 1998 and my cousin, Les Halpin who passed away in September of 2013.

While, I didn't feel the emotions of Mr. Fitzmaurice's plight in this memoir, that in no way diminishes it.

Thank you to NetGalley  and Simon Fitzmaurice for an ARC of this novel in exchange for an honest review.

Published on NetGalley, Goodreads and Amazon on 8.13.17.
4465248
I love biographies and memoirs; to be be honest I prefer those about regular folks,  not celebrities or other famous persons. I "borrowed" this from the Kindle Owner's Lending Library.  I can honestly,  and sadly when I read again all the other glowing reviews,  say  that I feel I wasted my monthly borrowing opportunity.  The story is heart wrenching,  and the pain experienced comes through very clearly.  The writing is good,  and I enjoyed the story told.  However,  since the mother didn't tell her children (anyone but her second husband?) the story of her former life, and one would not think that after her death there were others left to provide all the incredibly detailed background...  How did the author get so much detail? If this book were defined differently,  if there were a forward (unless I completely missed it on my Kindle- and it 's possible...)  describing where the author got the incredibly detailed story of the interactions her mother had as a child, young woman,  young bride and devastated young mother-- perhaps I would not feel the sense of disappointment I did.  I'm not suggesting it is not a worthy read, and my respect to the author for whom this touching story is her (obviously very loving and resilient mother's) history,  but if you have any expectation you are reading a true memoir, you may be disappointed.  ** Edit:  Rather than changing my original review text, I would like you to read the comment from the author and my subsequent reply to her kind post.**
2202871
This is an engaging read, though I didn't find it in the least humorous. Nor was it what I expected.  Based on the title (and the blurbs on the book), I expected it to be more about her, well, driving with dead people and working at a funeral home.  It's really not that at all.  While she has a morbid fascination with death in her early years, it's really the tale of her dysfunctional family.

Unfortunately, as someone who enjoys a good memoir, I am left on this one wondering what is true and what is not.  Certainly, I believe it is at least part of her truth - but one gets the sense that even she has not totally resolved in her own mind her true feelings.  When you combine this with the fact that she's writing it under a false name, using false locations and "composites" of real people and events instead of actual people and events - it leaves you wondering if this is really a memoir or more like when a movie says "based on a true story".

I prefer more up-front honest memoirs like&nbsp;<a data-hook="product-link-linked" class="a-link-normal" href="/The-Glass-Castle-A-Memoir/dp/B0017ODVA4/ref=cm_cr_arp_d_rvw_txt?ie=UTF8">The Glass Castle: A Memoir</a>, but all in all this is an engaging read that'll make most folks feel good about their own dysfunctional families.
4652904
I hate to say someone's heartfelt holocaust memoir is a "bad" book, but I will just leave it at this: it's not Weisel's Night.
510897
I love memoirs sadly I am  sorry I couldn't get into this one
Sorry it was hard to keep my attention on the story
1453768
The subject matter of the book is timely and relevant.  Aspen Matis' story is one that deserves to be told.  That being said, I have a difficult time reviewing this memoir because it's often difficult to separate the reverence I feel for the author's experiences and the way I was affected by the author's tone in places.  Matis was sexually assaulted on her second night at college, and she chose to defy her parents in pursuing justice.  As we have seen countless times before, she found little help in her college's mediation process.  She decided to hike the Pacific Crest Trail from Mexico to Canada- a journey that took five months- as a way to heal and to rebuild her life.  The descriptions of the hike were my favorite parts of the book.  I was astonished by her bravery and by the way she persevered through the physical and emotional obstacles she faced.  Like "Wild," I was in awe of her immense courage.  However, like other reviewers have stated, her tone was exhausting at times.  Her anger towards her parents seemed irrational in places.  But as I said, this is her story.  This is her survival.  I just couldn't dismiss the sense of entitlement and somewhat juvenile tone that tainted her very gripping personal narrative.  If you have ever rolled your eyes during an episode of "Girls," then you know what I'm talking about.  I'd recommend this book, though.  She is a talented young writer who shows a lot of promise.
2299812
It's not what I expected. I thought it was written aiming to general point of views rather than a personal story.
1982403
Ive been wanting to read this since it released but I put it off because its a story I already know. A story that is deeply painful, that still doesnt have a happy ending. I don't know that it ever will. But the hope in THUG is enough to make me believe that it can, someday, if we all keep trying.
863300
I heard an interview on npr with the author and immediately wanted to read this memoir. It is not a light read but I read it quickly.  Because it is a true story, I knew I was not guaranteed a happy ending, but I read on hoping this for the author.  However, the author's honesty both endeared me to her and angered me to some of her decisions. It was interesting to me how I could cheer for her decision to place her son for adoption while at the same time hoping she would keep him.  Definitely worth reading!
3581937
Good book, I did really expect a good true story, so sad. I hope we all learn from these dogs, no I will not call them dogs as I like dogs.