First novel needs some depth and plot development.
931682
Clearly a first effort writer. No depth of character and seemed very juvenile reading.
This author will succeed with more character and plot development.
1816203
I think this is really a 2 and 1/2 star book. It is a promising first novel, but does not live up to all these four and five stars others have awarded it. There are some good action scenes, but some of the motives are a bit too much to handle. There is a lot of jumping back and forth from character to character and location to location. And there are a lot of characters to keep track off. I would expect this author to improve over time.
2968779
It has potential, just needs better build up of characters, more description and better punctuation to clarify the story. The characters are established within the story, but they need more depth to them. Keep working on the writing, the potential is definitely there.
1516809
This is Marshall's first work, and it is a respectable piece to enter the market on. However, it is not without it's flaws. There are a lot of reviews for this book which gush and glow, or alternately, give you a brief synopsis of what the book is about, without actually sharing any criticisms. This is not one of those reviews. This book does deserve a fair shake, however, so I've rated it four stars due to its context as a first novel.

The book begins well, it holds interest and is descriptively solid about particular facets of the world. This can be a little tedious sometimes, as there are pages where a character will begin speaking, but no dialogue will hit the page until two paragraphs later. It is thick with exposition, especially about the main character's past as a developer, which felt necessary, and quagmires in descriptions of the political system of New Metra. I am not often the sort to jump ahead, but it took all I had to finish reading about the politics. It would have been better 'shown' rather than 'told' and there were ample opportunities throughout the story to pair that knowledge with scenes and action.

Another failing I noted, and one that bothered me considerably, was the lack of description of New Metra City itself in any considerable detail. We learn it's on an island and that it has drainage issues. We learn of it's corporate region, carved from the body of a desiccated United States of America. We even get a few very good descriptions of particular places--the worst neighborhoods in town come to mind, for example. What we don't get is a clear sense of what the city looks like. There is a scene in a bar called 'Glass' which overlooks the city, but Marshall did not take the opportunity to really expound on what the city looks like from the glass walled palaces of the wealthy living hundreds of levels above the ground populace. It was a good moment for that sort of description, which it lacked, in favor of focusing on interpersonal communications between characters.

Toward the end, the book gets a good bit of action. The actual description of the action was quite good, but the scenes around the action took benefited from at best a few lines of description. It felt as if the characters, who were careful in their passage, much of it stealthy, moved far too quickly. The scenes also felt rushed from the perspective of the narrative, taking far less time and demonstrating less about the world than they could have.

It's a good book. You should read it. But keep in mind, it's an introduction of sorts. By the end, you may know what I mean when I say that Lightcap feels like a story about the background characters in a different novel. But on the bright side, they are background characters from a novel I'd like to read.

I wish Marshall the best of luck, and to bust his butt on whatever form a sequel takes. The writer has a bright future ahead.
3788542
Let me begin by saying that, if it were possible, I would give this book three and a half stars.  But this appears to be the author's first publication, and I support new authors.  It is crazy difficult to write a book and I take my hat off to anyone who has followed a project to completion.  So.

Here is what I liked about the book.  The premise is interesting.  I think we can all agree there is something alluring about mysterious undiscovered islands with an unknown problem.  Lost was like that.  And the author attempted to write a likeable cast of characters.

Here is why I'm only giving it three and a half stars.  Tone.  Unfortunately the tone of the book was a distraction for me.  The setting and technological level portrayed in the book is medieval, but often the words and concepts used by characters are very modern.  So you're confronted with a world of waring noble houses and sailing ships and feasting halls but characters who use words like "nutritionist" or "noncombatant" or talk about science or the vertical of someone's jump.  The main character 'Dane', the son of a major lord, goes around telling social inferiors not to call him "sir" and, when his men balk, he has discussions with them about their feelings.  This is modern behavior with modern concepts that developed in modern times.  I don't claim to be a an expert at medieval living and social customs, but I've spent a good bit of time researching the reality of life in the era when nobles actually ruled and gunpowder hadn't come into use yet.  I guess that's why the tone of the book is jarring for me; there is a dissonance between the medieval level of technology and character thoughts and behavior.
3694956
Mixed feelings on this first book; but would like to read another to see the characters again and see if the author improves
4486578
For a first effort, this is a pretty good novel. Character development was a little shallow, but the story moved along. I hope this author keeps up the good work.
4367914
This book has a decent enough plot, and good potential characters. It needs however, a good editor and a reworking before its ready. Way too many "I" statements. The writing style is neither smooth nor mature. It lacks compelling beautiful writing, more of an technical writing. It is a filled out synopsis.
The good thing is the author seems to have lots of friends willing to put a good review in. Its good to have friends.
I honestly thought this was a young new writer's first attempt at writing not a college professor and a pro screen writer.
2287843
For a first novel it is exceptional. Great concept, well developed.  The characters need more depth to them. It is very clear that a character is either good or bad. There is no gray area. I think they need to be flawed to help reader's relate more.
392339
3.5 Stars rounded up for Amazon. This was a promising debut novel from this author, an enemies to lovers story with just a hint of West Side Story. Two rival gang members in Chicago unknowingly meet on the other sign of town, looking for fast, clandestine sex. No one can be found out as gay and stay alive in the gangs. Jackson has been in his gang for years, moving up in the hierarchy to distributor for street dealers. Evan has just joined after living on the streets for years and hes also a coke addict. Its a fairly gritty narrative, describing whats required to obtain a place in the gangs, with depictions of stealing, killing and a lot of drug use. It certainly sounded and felt authentic in that respect. There was decent character building, dual POVs and the setting created the right mood and atmosphere for most of the story.

There were a number of things that just hit the wrong notes to really draw me into the novel or the characters as a couple. Supposedly they had eyes on them, preventing them from leaving the gangs, yet Evan going to Jacksons apartment every night for months was never noticed. There was building tension but not much payoff, with too much going too easily. There was some good internal dialogue from each of them but not enough to feel the love growing, mostly just sex and dirty talk, which started hot, but became tedious after the third or fourth time. When the story finally reaches a major crisis point, it has little direct impact after the fact, and no follow-up. The narrative seemed to lose some direction from there, winding down a little too gently to a soft landing and I wanted more catharsis. It simply didn't match up well with what had gone before. I would read this author again, as the writing was quite good overall and had the potential to become more than it was. Id still recommend it, as it was entertaining and comes with an HEA for an unlikely romantic duo.

*An ARC was provided by the author or publisher and I have chosen to publish a fair and honest review for Hearts On Fire Reviews blog*
3740093
Good for a first novel.  There were times when there was too much repeating of the story..ie the way the mother kept reminding the reader that she only wanted to protect her children.  That fact had been established from the beginning of the book.  At times I felt like the author was writing a 1000 word paper and repeated herself in order to get the 1000 words in.  I did like the way the book ended on an open ended way to introduce  her next book in the series.
2720398
The characters  show possibility for development. Two decent loving police officers, two decent lovable librarians, a loving family and a loving lovers family, for the heroine, and a small town in Ohio. The problem is that the author needed a mystery in which to involve these characters and chose poorly. For no visible reason in the character or situation of the heroine, she is made to appear witless,
Too bad. The book is still readable, there is occasion to fear for her safety, to sympathize with her plight, to root for the Good Guys;  there is just not much occasion to respect her intelligence or  common sense.
If this is going to be a series, I can recommend the book as a lead-in to what might easily become much more appealing. In itself it serves well as an introduction to these characters,  the library setting and the small town feeling. I even find myself rooting for the author and hoping she will find a better mystery theme about which to weave her story.
1879453
The Hundred Thousand Kingdoms is the first book in the Inheritance Trilogy, written by first time author N.K. Jemisin, a new voice in the fantasy genre. The book is far from perfect, but as far as debut novels go, it's pretty good. The story follows the adventures of Yeine, leader of a somewhat barbarian tribe who happens to be the granddaughter of the most powerful man in the world. Her grandfather, seemingly out of the blue, names her one of three potential heirs. Yeine finds herself in a whole new world of intrigue and danger, as she realizes that her rivals will stop at nothing to take the throne. And even more dangerous, perhaps, is the fact that Yeine's grandfather and his progeny control a God and his offspring who, bitter after years of abuse and confinement, have their own deadly agendas.

Jemisin writes from the limited first person perspective of Yeine. So a lot of the action occurs off the page and is related by Yeine some time later. Yeine is an entertaining narrator. She is intelligent, funny, and likeable. She is also pretty ignorant at first, which leaves the reader equally ignorant. If you like that style of writing, you should like Jemisin's style. The prose is nothing fancy. Jemisin can write some pretty good descriptive narration when she wants to, but it doesn't really fit with Yeine's style of addressing the reader. The dialogue is generally sound but can be a little wooden and unrealistic at times. The result of the narrative, too, is that some plot elements and action sequences are poorly explained. The novel can be confusing at times, not because of any internal complexity, but simply from poor explanation. But for the most part, the reader can understand what is going on pretty easily.

As far as the plot goes, the story reminded me of a combination of Neil Gaiman's Stardust and Brandon Sanderson's Warbreaker, which is, in my opinion, no bad thing. Behind-the-scenes political maneuvering plays an important role, but give way pretty early on to the imprisoned Gods, who really come to dominate the novel as it progresses. The Gods' are varied and interesting, albeit somewhat archetypical (obvious analogs, for example, to Athena and Ares, any number of trickster Gods, etc.). The plot has a bit of a romance novel feel to it. The leader of the Gods is, apparently, immensely beautiful, deeply sensual, incredibly dangerous, and ridiculously good in bed. Basically, he comes off like the male lead in countless romance novels. But that aside, the romantic aspects were reasonably well done and don't hinder the story.

The main reason why The Hundred Thousand Kingdoms gets only 3 stars is that it just isn't that exciting. Jemisin has a lot of potential and can do a lot with the Inheritance Trilogy. But this one leaves a lot to be desired. She does everything well, but she does very little exceptionally well. The characters are interesting but unmemorable. The plot is good but not gripping. The twists are clever but somewhat predictable. The magic is okay but not very well described or explained. Basically, the novel is okay (especially for a debut novel), but it could have been great. The pieces are there and Jemisin, I think, has the talent. But I'm interested enough to pick up the sequel.

So if you're looking for an entertaining and quick read, you could do worse than picking up Jemisin's the Hundred Thousand Kingdoms. It isn't spectacular. It's not going to change the fantasy genre. But it's fun. And Jemisin certainly has the potential to become one of the great young voices in the genre.
3178025
An urban fantasy book that's a bit unusual from many of the others out there that are actually just romance novels with the supernatural in them (despite the stereotypical romance novel hot model on the cover), but one that needs some work in order to make it great.
  The Positive: The protagonist, Mercy Thompson, is actually pretty refreshing:  She's not a detective out to take down the supernatural world, she's an auto mechanic trying to exist in a world where some of the supernatural has "come out".  In fact, she could probably move to Charles deLint's Newford and fit in pretty well there.  She's not a typical wizard/faerie/werewolf/vampire, but a different type of supernatural being.  Mercy is tough, and can fight, but she's not a Black Widow-esque badass and does exhibit a variety of emotions that don't lessen her as a character.  Romantic interests are present, but not in a "This is Romance Novel!" overwhelming fashion.  The story is a good one with an interesting plot.

  What Needed Work:  The author felt the need to explain Everything about the world she's building.  This quickly reached a point where I felt like every other paragraph was an explanation about some term or concept in the previous paragraph, so the format was like this:
  Paragraph 1:  (Situation is described) (Something happens) (Characters might react)
  Paragraph 2:  (Explanation of how the situation happened based on char's society/biology/rules of magic/etc) (Characters get to respond to Paragraph 1's actions) (Characters' responses are explained, either in this paragraph or the next one).
  The format detracted from reading the actual story.

  Overall, it was an interesting world and characters, but the constant explaining resulted in the diminishing of the actual story.  Perhaps this is the author's first book and the rest of the series will improve; eventually I'll follow up with the second book, but not yet.
4233055
While I'm not sure if this novel was the author's first it had more or less a feel that there was still much more room to grow and much more to be desired in this novel and the writing style.
346384
Entertaining but confusing at times.  Needed more depth
4841085
Unfortunately the novel is suffering from the same problem as most short storys. There is too much information that needs to be placed in to little page volume. As a result the characters are not very deep and there seems to be no actual characterization of the plot, so even now I am still wondering if this was a romance or suspense. I could not connect to the story line at all. But nevertheless the idea behind the story was interesting and the writing was good and fluent so I am still willing to rate it with 3 stars. And I will definitively check a second book of this author.