Can't believe this was actually good.
354946
People kept saying that the graphics are what made this movie, but there's something more to it. In the beginning it's true that there are a lot of CGI shots that are great, but outside of that the first half hour is melodramatic and boring. Then something interesting happens: you find yourself invested in Bullock's character. I don't know how/why it happens but it does, and you root for her. And all the CGI just becomes a backdrop (thankfully) to really good performance. It's worth seeing.
3497454
I guess I'm getting old. I made it through 12 minutes of this drivel and couldn't watch any more. Distasteful beginning, a whole lot of gore, huge body count. I don't enjoy it. And then it's obvious the plot is ridiculous from the beginning, completely implausible. Hell, Independence Day is more plausible than this dreck.

ETA: went back and watched more of it. Still dreadful. What a load of pretentious codswallop.
4436877
This was not believable.  I don't know how it ends up because I turned it off.  She was meant to be a person of faith (most likely Catholic??) but she was willing to date a man who said he didn't believe in God and sleep with him outside of marriage--and then she got her advice on life from a Tarot card reader?  A person who had enough faith to wear a cross, hang a crucifix in her home AND object to someone taking the Lord's name in vain would never seek advice from a Tarot card reader--it's like this was written by someone who had no concept of what it really means to be a Catholic or what a person of faith is really like.

I sympathized with the situation at the start where some down-on-his-luck guy ran into his stylish, successful ex-wife and wanted a woman to pretend she was his girlfriend--not a bad start if a bit overused.  It just went downhill from there.  His personality was obnoxious and whiny and I couldn't figure out what she ever saw in him.  She was leagues above him in looks and personality.  They were a mismatch in every way.

So, they started in the diner where they met, then showed scenes of them dating, living together, etc., but kept cutting back to the diner, which just interrupted the flow of the movie and became annoying.

I'll watch a silly, poorly acted, badly written movie if it's funny or entertaining or the characters are likable or the plot interesting--this had NONE of that.  It wasn't funny.  The characters weren't likable.  The relationship didn't make sense.  The plot meandered and jumped back and forth and kept losing my interest.

So, I don't know if the movies was showing flash forwards to their actual life or if the whole movie actually took place in the diner and the flash forwards were imaginary or what "might be" if they continue the relationship or if there is some other twist.  I just don't care and can't stomach watching more to find out.
4861595
It was just awful.

A lot of potential in the premise (or rather multiple premises), but ruined by piss-poor direction -- that's the only explanation for the fact that EVERY actor in this woebegotten teleplay seemed to be reading their lines under the influence of a narcotic.  Or under the influence of formaldehyde.

And the lines they should've been putting some, er, acting, into were also dreadful -- some good ideas here (actually, too many... it would take an encyclopedia to map out the stolen "homages" to various genres) but terrible, terrible writing.

For a low budget, though, the sets, special effects imagery and photography were quite good.

Too bad overall.... I really wanted to like this one.

Absolutely not worth paying any money for.  Try to find it for free on the internet, but even that's not worth too much effort.

(Too bad SyFy didn't pick up the Lost Room... that had real potential, unlike this clunker.)
2649371
I understand going into something like this that it's an action movie, not a good movie. However, this was very bad. None of the story development made any sense.
3193847
My wife and I had a lazy Sunday and decided to watch this turd based on the 4+ stars that it had on Amazon. It was definitely lower than a "B" movie as the special effects and acting were subpar. In a way, it was like a trainwreck... we just couldn't seem to stop watching. There were some funny parts. Don't get me wrong, it was slightly entertaining and not a bad effort from a director that is only a 4th grader.
3958041
I'm sorry, I don't get it. I watched this with my in-laws, my wife and two kids aged 7 and 9. At the end, my father-in-law summed it up: It sure had some pretty colors!

That, it does!  At first, even the colors are sparse. The story line is incredibly dull and difficult to fully grasp.  There are virtually no spoken parts. It is - at best - grunted from time to time. There are dream sequences, that even the adults weren't always sure of which were reality and which parts were dream sequences.  Most difficult to understand (for us) was who he was with and where he was living half the time.

We honestly didn't know what we had watched when we were done.

THAT SAID, we were pretty sure that we were supposed to feel guilty after watching it. There seemed to be a lot about haves and have nots and evil rich people and good poor people who coughed and lost their crummy-to-begin-with jobs.

It was drawn beautifully in parts, and much like cutouts from magazines in other parts. In one scene where forests were being ravaged - or deforested - it actually became real, grainy, film.

It felt like something that really rich people would watch, proclaim to be incredible, then go out and donate some money to a carbon footprint exchange to feel better about themselves, and then go on with their lives.

It was really one of the least interesting, least impactful, and least enjoyable movies I have seen in my life.

My revi3w appears to be censored for some reason.
126585
Oh, to describe how bad it sucked. Well, your imagination can't imagine how badly this sucked. I don't want to say the word "girls," now. Or watch these people have sex. It is not funny. My boyfriend said that it had no nudity, even though it totally did, it was just so absolutely bizarre. I read that it had "awkward sex" and that made me want to watch it.  That was the best part, but still not good, just bizarre. and not in a good way. we did not laugh or get into it or LIKE the CHARACTERS!!!!!! the characters sucked, they were not well-defined or believable or well-acted. It is the antithesis of Sex in the City which is such a big, well-acted show. It just is not, at all FUNNY. or clever. or anything!!!!! at all. I had some weird frown on my face, the whole time, like I had eaten a semi-sour pickle. This is not an expression that I enjoyed! Also, I was kind of psyched about the dad character. I think he was the quirky yuppie from Newhart and his part was very disappointing. It was like watching a train wreck, except it wasn't a train wreck. It was like watching an empty train track with no landscape and a girl would say and do some pretty disgusting, yet boring things, and you would be so glad that you didn't pay 19.99 to be there, and you would drive away. P.S., the pretty girl was too pretty and unbelievable. They all were unbelievable.
3926048
The make-ups are horrible, the acting is half-hearted and the story flows like someone wrote it on the bus.  I can't believe this show has so many supporters. One reviewer compared it to the show Once -  sure, if you take Once, add to it bad acting, no drama, silly comedy and nonsensical scripts. Maybe they wrote this for little kids that like their entertainment weird and stupid.
3095221
I wish I had seen that almost half of the people who watched this movie thought it was crap, or else I would not have wasted $5 on it. What a total piece of garbage.

It had so much potential, so much ability to do great things...and to say it fell flat on its face would be an understatement. It was truly the worst movie I've seen in many many years (on par with Pacific Rim). There was literally no storyline to this movie. Every single plot progression ended with a plot hole, and were left unexplained. I could not believe that some of these actors, and the SciFi channel, would sign on to a movie that was this horribly written. I've lost a lot of respect for those actors and SciFi for making this garbage...and even thinking the ending was okay. I know some writers/directors think they are amazing because they end their movies with cliffhangers to "let the audience decide what happens" (which to me is the laziest form of writing)...but this one just went nowhere.
4381455
Didn't like this and couldn't even finish.
2048037
Some movies are so bad they are good. Others are just so bad they come off as silly and really pretty poor. This movie is in the latter category but by goodness it tries hard with practically nothing.

Basically this is a tale of a bunch of Templar Knights who... well there isn't really any indication what they are wandering about for - and they happen upon a village that has just had the stuffing smashed out of it by pirates. They sort the pirates out and then go out to their ship that is moored in the bay. Along with them goes this woman (Cecily Fay) who is darn handy in a fight who was also in the village when it was attacked. No indication as to what a fighter of her calibre was doing randomly there is given, she just happened to be hanging out in the local chapel when the pirate attack happened..... Anyway I digress. Once they get on the ship they find out that a young woman from the village played by Shinead Byrne has cursed anyone who gets on board the ship who has spilled blood to morph into some sort of gargoyle creature. And rather inconveniently this includes the Templars who have just rescued her. And she can't remove the curse. Hence they are drawn into an adventure as one by one of them succumbs to the curse. And there is a dragon, which can control the gargoyles the Templars morph into.

This is a very budget movie. The ship is obviously a modern yacht, the whole thing was filmed on the cheap - the costumes, the effects, the camera work - everything screams of poverty. It actually often reminded me of what would happen if your local theatre company decided to make a movie. Cecily Fay is so tiny she looks ridiculous as someone who can fight and the lack of back story for her character is just bizarre. Sinead Byrne manages to have the same frightened/confused look on her face the whole film and the guy who plays the sorcerer towards the end looks like the guy that collects the tickets at your local museum roped in, put in a robe and told to recite some lines. But hilariously it's just because it's all so earnest that you feel churlish complaining overmuch about the performances.

If you enjoy low budget fantasy then this is worth a look. It can't be compared to what might be termed 'proper' movies and probably only rewards viewers who played too much dungeons and dragons as young pups. But we all know there are plenty of those....
4296359
This is my first Amazon review, and I'm only doing it as a public service. Evidently, I didn't spend enough time looking at the reviews before hitting the buy button.  I'm game for a cheesy love story and thought I knew what I was getting in to.  But I ended up giving up after about 15% in, then skipped to the end to see if it got any better.  Believe me, the characters don't get any more believable, developed or likeable.  It wasn't even good enough for a freebie, so I'm really ticked that I actually spent money on this.
1701265
Wow, I can't believe this book got such good ratings! I read through about half of the book then just skimmed the rest, l could barely get to the end. The characters were so flat and unbelievable. I found it really offensive how weak and acquiescent Beth was - before even knowing Wrath's (uck) name, she immediately has sex with him, then is afraid of him, then goes straight into be head over heels for him. He's constantly picking her up and taking care of her like she's a child, it's really disturbing - Beth is not a strong female character at all. They never have any meaningful conversations, their entire and extremely short relationship is based on lust - they barely know a thing about each other. Wrath and his "brotherhood" are completely laughable - the first time Ward gives a description of him, I was completely put off - dresses in all leather, 6'6", 275 lbs, with long black hair a widows peak? Ugh, he sounds like a body-building dracula wanabee. And seriously, the names? Wrath, Rhage, Vishous, Rehvenge? SO clever (that was sarcasm).  And I still don't understand the whole vampire/lesser situation, it was so badly explained - it was like I was missing a critical piece of information as to why this strange "sensai" impotent albino was murdering hookers to lure in vampires...vampires that don't feed off of them or humans, just each other. And why on earth was so much of the book focused from Mr. X's (yep, Mr. X, gag) point of view? Half of the book is him slitting throats and fantasizing about torture, yuck.
I usually enjoy paranormal romance/urban fantasy, but this book left me totally unsatisfied. Some great alternatives, if you're looking for a fun read with a good plot and much more substantial characters are Karen Marie Mooning's Fever series, Chloe Neil's Chicagoland Vampire series, and Jeaniene Frost's Nighthuntress series. Seriously, don't waste your time or money on this book unless you're looking for a stereotypical, badly written, flat romance novel with crappy sex scenes.
4162177
My God, this movie was awful.  Bad acting, brainless dialogue, innefective makeup, and some of the worst editing I've ever seen.  How this movie could have so many fans is mind-boggling.  I guess it's good for a couple of laughs, especially when it comes to the head-exploding scene.  But otherwise, this is lacking in both wit and actual fear.  It's a trashy type of film you see at around 2 in the morning with a pizza in your hand.  Just because it claims to be a satire on consumerism doesn't make it a good movie.  Just because it had gore doesn't make it a good movie.  This film has nothing going for it.
4433945
I can't believe some of these reviews. There is no way anyone listening to this gabbage can say its good. It's HORRIBLE. Constantine was decently passable on idol, but this garage band he screamed with just made him lose stock, which wasn't that high in the first place.
1619420
I tried to give this thing a quarter of the star but it wouldn't let me. It was unbelievably stupid and can't believe anybody like it.  Anyone with any good taste that is.