Practical Psychology in One Lesson: "What Did You Say..."
355287
If I had the power to transport one book back in time and send it to myself, this would be the one. This is the book I needed when I became a people manager. It's also the book I needed when I began to raise my kids. In fact, I can't think of a time in my life when I did not wish I had more of the skills this book teaches. A simple but very deep book that causes a new level of understanding about how to talk to people with each reading. The authors draw on the best ideas from the great psychologists and show how to use them practically in everyday interactions. The short volume is easy to read and full of examples that can be immediately applied. In my humble opinion, this book is indespensible when managing people at work and managing close relationships at home. The conversational and entertaining style is a plus.
3356271
Bonnie Landry's book easily explains how to simplify your homeschool studies of spelling tests, reading, writing, copywork, into one beautiful, bonding activity of one-on-one dictation with your child.  I tried her advice with happy results from the first day forward.  My children are happier to have less schoolwork since dictation consolidates many areas of language arts and they were happier to have each recieved personal attention and teaching from mom each day.  They are coming up to me and hugging me later in the day after we cozied up to do dictation together!  Bonnie is right: it's an activity that brings you closer together.
The booklet is a quick read, so one morning my husband found it on the table, read it during breakfast and then proceeded to conduct the day's dictation lesson with one of the kids himself!
887442
I like this book a lot because it gives practical advice.  Some books are too theoretical and just focus on building relationship, empathy, etc., which of course, are important.  But this books gives quick and direct advice, e.g. games you can play, and when to play them to prevent problems from occurring in the first place.

The situations described are specific to "specials' classes.  I really don't like the term specials - they are part of children's core education.

The author is also very reflective in that he talks about the teacher's demeanor, their observation of their body language and that of the students, and how to respond if their body language is already telling you some information.
783208
The depth and breadth of information contained in these pages is guarunteed to alter the practices of even the most veteran teachers. Teachers will learn the specifics for incorporating multisensory teaching into their daily routines. Explicit examples make the strategies easy to use in the classroom. The immediate payoff is evident in increased student learning. This should be a requirement for any preservice teacher and those who have been in the field for a while.
3089647
I really liked the approach this book takes. You start with words you already know and for conversation, it works that they teach the past tense first, because this is used most often when telling people about an event.  The pace was about right to cover the book in a nine months of lessons, which we did when we used this book for a senior citizens Spanish class.
2113996
Very useful lecture. As a psychotherapist I am now more confident with situations, where I don't know what to do, what to say. I leave space and somehow answers come...It works. On the other hand I see, that there is no need to mistify such people as Tolle ( somehow superficial knowledge about analytical therapies). Anyway: great wisdom, new aproach, fresh look, "evidence based" work.

Matjaz Lesjak MD
178419
I am not in the medical field (read the book after my wife, who is a nurse, recommended it) but found that the methods taught are extremely helpful in my business.  Dr. Clabby takes complex psychological topics and presents them in a manner that allows anyone in an advisory role to learn valuable skills that are practical and evidenced based.  I often see employees/friends/co-workers dealing with issues that I previously felt unequipped to handle or provide adequate advice - this book changed that.  Something as simple as, purposely beginning each difficult conversation or potential argument with 15 minutes of calmness...try it, it gets the conversation going in a more construction direction.  Dr. Clabby has stripped away any unnecessary fluff which allows for clear, concise teaching and an easy read (not many Psychological books fall into this category).  He understands that the "advisor" is not always a skilled professional and this books caters to that thought - it has given me the framework and confidence to make a positive impact on my relationships at work and at home.  If you are uncertain about buying this book you should ask yourself a question; do people come to me for advice?  If so, you should pick up a copy of this book.  If people do NOT come to you for advice then you should buy the book and maybe they will start.
507030
Clear, systematic and logical, this book provides a practical way to teach grammar in a painless, sometimes even fun way. Each two-page chapter includes 4-6 exercises where students can work together to learn a specific grammar point and improve speaking skills. Best part: the concise grammar summaries in the back - far better than Azar. Better for classroom use than self-study, but several students have used it outside of class too.
2966641
This little book is a how-to book that clearly teaches how to communicate effectively with one another using clear and practical skills. Though written for women it has something to say to everyone, men included. Thank you, Christy, for sharing your experience and wisdom on a subject that can bring more understanding into all our relationships, both professional and personal.
124766
The optimum phrase in the title of this review is, "in this moment."
Although I read this book 9 years ago, just scanning the book for the highlights that I noted reminds me of what I must live by.
The Fundamentals of Being Influential:
1.  Instead of criticism, compassionately respond to what your interlocutor has experienced.
2.  To get someone to do something, give them something that they want; something that is within your principles; something that you do for them, based upon their needs and wants, not yours.
3.  Talk about what they want, and encourage them to get it, based upon their own abilities.
4.  Before you try to make someone do stomething, ask yourself, "How can I influence him/her, in a way that is mutually respecting, to want to do it?"
5.  Show people that you are sincerely interested in their ability to express what they most value?
6.  Become a good conversationalist, by listening well, and by responding to the underlying meaning of what your interlocutor is telling you.
7.  If you believe that you have something to prove to someone, do so in a subtle, adroit way, without telling anyone that you are doing it - be sure that you are doing it, as part of who you are?
8.  When you are wrong, admit, unequivocably, then gracefully change subjects.
9.  Begin adverse situations and otherwise, with a friendly demeanor, and focus upon peaceful resolve.
10.  During conflicts, let your interlocutor talk more than you.  Recognize that those who talk the most have the most to lose.
11.  Show that you consider your interlocutor's ideas and feelings to be just as important as yours are, while you keep counsel with your agreements with yourself.
12.  Appeal to nobler motives.
13.  When you state a truth, follow this with vivid, interesting, dramatic, yet succinct supportive information.
14.  Realize that the majority of people are motivated most by self-expression - challenge them to embrace this.
15.  Be sincere, respectful and compassionate
16.  When making a request, put it in a form that conveys the idea that your interlocutor will benefit by doing what you are requesting, and that the benefits are ones which you see are ones that s/he appreciates.
There's a reason why this book has been around since 1936, and that next to the bible, it is the # 1 book.
Read this book to guide yourself to get more out of life, through  taking responsibility for your part in your experiences with each person who you interact with - no matter what the perceived external power.
4046832
Hi Liz,
I received your book yesterday and read it today. Such a clear and easy book to read with such practical ideas to try. I enjoyed the reference to the Double Split Experiment and the section on 11:11:11:11. I can't wait to share this book with my daughter in law who is a gifted teacher but is quickly getting burned out. Thank you so much for your time and research. Sandy Leathers
3500105
We can all become better verbal communicators, and Bjornson has provided a wealth of practical advice in this regard. He discusses many speaking situations, ranging from everyday ones to one where the other person is malicious and verbally abusive.

Bjornson believes that the refinement of verbal communication skills is not as strongly emphasized as it had been in past times. One common problem in modern speaking is the tendency to ask too many questions and to interrupt conversations. When it comes to job interviews, Bjornson suggests that it is best for the interviewee to have studied the boss' needs and then to verbally match his/her abilities in detail (not vaguely) to the boss' needs for the particular job position. Everyday speaking with others requires the understanding of what others are driving at. Bjornson recommends the use of phrases such as: "You sound like...", "You feel used...", "You are angry because..." and the like.

Bjornson devotes a fair amount of detail to the use of leading questions. These are commonly used by lawyers, politicians, and journalists. When using assertive talk, one needs to keep in mind Bjornson's distinction between assertive and aggressive talk. It is possible to focus on a criticism without either agreeing or challenging the blame that is behind the words of criticism. When it comes to negotiations, as for setting a price for an item, Bjornson gives practical tips for negotiating a good deal. A good read!
1688044
A skill-based book. Great examples with practical advice. I am a social worker and I wonder why these communication skills were not taught in the college curriculum.
3004329
Jennifer cut through the psycobabble and delivers real world lessons, that when applied will improve your life immeasurably. These real world,
life improvement lessons should be mandatory for every teen and adult. Entertain yourself and smile as I have.
549439
An easy listen (audio ).. There are some very practical suggestions to acquire new habits.  Author references other books which I have  also explored.
1569093
Character matters. Character is learned, not inborn.  In terms of teaching character, actions speak louder than words.  In "Lessons Kids Need to Learn",  David Staal uses these principles to help parents examine different life lessons that not only build character, but build resilience in children (and adults).  He emphasizes the importance of acting out positive character traits, not merely talking about them.

Staal pairs complementary character traits, talks about what they mean, and uses examples from his own family, from articles and memoirs, and from focus groups conducted with parents and teens.

Staal's 6 lessons are drawn from basic Judeo-Christian values, but this is not simply a Christian parenting book.  Any reader who believes that children need a good foundation to thrive will find much to like here:

*  Believe that you matter -- Live like others matter more
*  Appreciate those who serve you -- Make serving others a priority
*  Forget unimportant stuff -- Remember life has consequences
*  Be a people person -- Be your own person
*  Find your unique fit -- Find out you can fail
*  Always speak up -- Only speak the Truth

"Lessons" includes heart lessons that are vital to healthy living: never lose hope, appreciate others, and practical lessons that help children get along in life: make eye contact, listen to others, a firm handshake makes a good impression.

Staal's book is not only valuable for the content, his writing voice is highly readable and lends itself well to discussion and reflection. (Keep a highlighter handy.)  To this end he includes 2-3 questions after each chapter.  The format of this book is suitable for individual study or for parents/caregivers to read together.  It would make a fantastic small group study for parenting groups in (or out of) the church.

Endnotes are included so that readers can find the original articles or books from which Staal pulls some of his quotes and statistics.

If you only read one parenting book this year (or ever), make it this one.
3284763
Plain modern language explaining age-old tools for understanding your own mind.