HORRIBLE SLOW LAME FLICK OF THE DECADE!!!
593404
HORRIBLE MOVIE!!!This is a B- movie on a hicks budget. No lie.  I'm watching it now and am almost 3/4 of the way through and there's no gore- monsters- scares-maybe two drops of blood and nothing but a scream every night they stay in the woods. The nightly scream sounds like a female actress in heat trying out for a porno flick.  STOP- if you're thinking of renting this flick. Check out my ratings for a better scare or gore fest flicks.  Stay as far away as possible from this not even good enough for the Discovery Chanel after school reject special.  You can thank me later when you've slapped yourself on the back for not getting suckered by the family members who are rating this movie 5 stars and wasting your cash on this lame- o-rama ride. Enough said.
54961
Right, lets get the good points out of the way first. It is has a good premise and good actors, that's it. The plot is underdeveloped and there is no sense of urgency throughout the film. (Somebody's shooting at me! ah well i'll just stroll to cover. I'll admit it's well made but only 30 minutes in the middle is any good with the physcotic killer chasing the main charcater. The rest of it is drawn out and BORING. To finish the movie in such a god damn awful way is inexcuseable with absolutely no explanation to what just happened. The acting is above par but nothing to write home about (except the throughly excellent Javier Bardeem) This is NOT the best film of the year and easily surpassed by American Gangster and Elizabeth, The Golden Age in terms of acting and spectactle. Only worth a watch when it's very cheap as it is an average chase thriller that didn't deserve the acclaim it got. This rounds off a poor awards season as between this  and the atrocious Atonement, I have no faith in movie critics any more!!!
1488839
this was the worst film i've seen to date and the biggest waste of my time.

i watched this solely based on a buzzfeed list of best horror films of 2015, and this was the first on the list. if this list is accurate, 2015 must have had a very, very bad year for horror films. the movie was slow, i found myself tapping my foot impatiently waiting for something, ANYTHING to happen...and when something finally did start happening it was basically over and i'm very pissed i wasted precious money on this pathetic excuse for a film.

no, i'm not one of "those people" that watches a movie and focuses on things like character development...i watch a movie and take it at face value. sorry not sorry. i'm not a critic and i don't get paid to care about the deeper meaning of things.
1820998
Lame script, butchered original story, no plot, younger Alice so precocious I wanted to drop-kick her to the moon! Older Alice dull, dull, dull!!! And what was with the very stupid dance by her at the end? Johnny Depp copying copies of himself, basically chanelled Willie Wonka, sick of Helena Bonham Carter's pissed-off looks (would she HAVE a job is she wsn't shacking up with Burton???), major Carroll characters (Cheshire Cat, caterpillar) only doig walk-ons or walk-throughs, dark,dreary backgrounds, same CGI effects seen in every movie now ad nauseum. I fell asleep. Be sure to miss this one.

However, it had a killer Elfman score! That's the only nice thing I can think to say.
85896
I hate to even waste my time writing a review for this junk!  But if a save one person from seeing this film it was all worth while.  It's too bad they could have made this film alot better but it's to late.  It's not worth the 3.00 to rent it and DON'T even think about buying it!! OK I'm done bi***ing now!
74892
And Larry did it once again...flub that is!!! This movie was one big smug and at best a summary with no development. Again, the actors were stale and untrained and yes the cursing returned. The plot was very, very weak. Noelle seemed to just fall into peer pressure with no reasoning or resistance and no sooner than she fell, she was very quickly redemmed after only one conversation with her pastor. Sorry, but this is just not real life. People don't simply fall into sin, they back-slide (it's a process). Oftentime, when we are redemmed, it is also a process of healing and forgiveness.

I hated the fact that Tosha's character was not explored further, she and her Mom had issues that were quickly wrapped up at the end with no inside story. Also, the script; was this improve or were there actual lines? The characters seemed to be feeling their way. The sound again was off...Varying from too LOUD to What is that noise? Larry, i'm tired of complaining; this is just not your calling. You have no passion, no vision, and obviously no patience for writing and producing good movies. Save yourself and these poor wannabe actors the shame. Vow to never make another movie!!!! I don't know how I tricked myself into watching the sequel to the already poorly written original. Thank God I got this free on Netflix this time around. I will never make this mistake again.
2955295
This is a low-budget flick with a weak plot, bad acting, boring gun fights, and lots of phony dying.

What annoyed me the most is all of the anachronisms.  They have a man with dreadlocks in one scene.  Has anybody ever seen a dreadlocked cowboy in authentic Old West photos!?  The female member of the posse is wearing Destiny's Child-esque midriff shirts.  During the 1800s surely she would have been seen as being half-naked and in violation of public decency laws.  One guy is wearing a leather jacket that you could imagine on a motorcyclist, but not a 19th-century cowboy.

The most irritating anachronism was the sheriff and her deputy.  Look, decades before the U.S. Amendment that gave women the right to vote and a century before Margaret Thatcher was PM of the UK, I highly doubt that two women led law enforcement in any town.  Further, I highly doubt that during the Jim Crow era a black person, of either gender, was the mayor of a multiracial town.  These two women looked more like cheerleaders than keepers of the peace.  Worse, they were passive and static characters that barely spoke a word.  Yes, the Old West may not have had the rigid gender and racial hierarchies that would have been scene in contemporary Boston.  Still, this is just fantasy to have such diversity in leadership during a stringently oppressive time period.

Plus this movie robs from soooooo many other films.  Like "New Jack City," a person kills a relative like Wesley Snipes' character killed Allen Payne's.  Like "Set It Off," some of the main characters proverbially "go out in a blaze of smoke."  Like "Posse," there is a river washing scene, but it lacked all the hot nudity.

There are only a few good things about this film.  I loved seeing Raymond Cruz, who played DiStefano in "Alien Resurrection," and Gabriel Casseus, who played Midget/Kyle in "New Jersey Drive," again.  I am glad that good male actors of color are still finding roles.  The casting director did a great job hiring the son of David Carridine's character.  They looked so much like each other, I had to check the credits to see if they were related.

It turns out that the director of "Gang of Roses" is also the director of this flick.  Who is giving this man so much money to make bad Westerns with black characters?  This film went straight to DVD for a reason.  Oh yeah, one more positive:  this film had French subtitles.  Soooo many low-budget films don't have foreign language subtitles.  I am glad this work did.  I encourage more film companies to follow suit.
4547079
This was the worst attempt at a horror movie that I have seen in a long time.
The writer should be ashamed,Universal should never have released this garbage.
20 minutes into this movie had me wanting to throw something at the TV.
Do yourself a favor and get a bootleg copy if you HAVE to see this crap. I don't condone bootleg downloads  ever but, in this case the makers of this movie do not deserve ant more money that they have already stolen from us.
In short the Strangers sucked,the killers were able to appear and then vanish in the blink of an eye and the only thing that even came close to bothering me was the guys mask.
Do not waste your time... oh, I hears there is going to be a strangers two in 2010... do we really need a sequel
to this incredibly bad attempt at a horror film??? This would have been scary to me if I was 9 or 10 years old...pure crap.
4301786
Everyone knows the only reason to try and make a sequel is to either: take the story in a new direction or to make a bigger, better film down the same path as the original. This movie fails to be anything. It's premise could have been written by an elementary school student! It has by far the worst special effects of the three fims( the graboids,in original form, look like block figures). Burt Gummer was by far the least interesting character in the first two films and they gave him his own movie(although he is good in small doses). The violence and body count of the first two aren't matched. THE MOVIE IS PG! FAMILY IS JUST ANOTHER WORD FOR CENSORSHIP!!!!! This movie was just plain terrible!
3610690
It deserves ZERO stars! This thing was hyped to death and like most horror fans I anticipated the release of Fear of Clowns. Okay, I know B-movies can be fun, like Killer Klowns from Outer Space. But that movie was supposed to be silly. This film was trying to be scary!! What??!! I'm all for laughs with a good cheesy horror flick on a weekend but you have to draw the line somewhere. This was a waste of my time as well as the director and the dreadful actors. I hope I never see those people again in anything! I thought Shivers had potential but the whole concept was totally wasted. The storyline didn't make a lick of sense and nothing was believable or frightening at all. And how about that technicolor blood? I thought we've outgrown that since the 60's and 70's! There is nothing fun or scary about this piece of crap whatsoever, and it totally mocks what indie horror should be. Either you're a spoof or you're not. Make up your mind before you make it people! This is a huge let down! I dozed several times during it and prayed for it all to be over. Please ignore this when you stop by the video store. The case and all of it's 4 star ratings are deceiving. Fear of Clowns is nothing to be afraid of.
1716502
After about 20 or 30 minutes I was praying for the time to pass by quickly so this crap movie would be over. There wasn't anything funny at all in the first 25 minutes, then, they tried to be funny the rest of the movie but I didn't laugh one time. This is by far the worst movie that Tim or Jamie have ever been in. I just donated this dvd to my library and good riddance!!!!!!
1403209
I can't believe I wasted the time to watch this HORRIBLE movie... after about 30 minutes, I wanted to turn it off, but thought since I'd already invested 30 precious minutes... you know.  What an arrogant jerk to even make this movie!!!  What in the world was he thinking?  I'm not a Redford fan at all but since the premise of the movie sounded exciting, I thought it might be worthwhile.  I'm not an ocean sailor, but couldn't believe some of the dumb things he did -- shaving before a big storm???  Tying his life raft to a big sinking boat and then going to sleep?  Leaving a flotation device on the boat when he had ample room in the life raft for it?  Letting the cap come unscrewed on his water jug so it filled up with salt water?  Not catching rain water in the numerous storms?  Geez.  I haven't left any other movie reviews but felt COMPELLED to let people know that this is a HUGE waste of time.  I'd give it minus-5 stars if I could.
310524
This movie is pretty lame.  I couldn't wait to see it after seeing the previews last fall, but it was sadly lame.  Louis Bloom (Jake Gyllenhaal) has no life, but one night he sees a guy, Joe Loder (Bill Paxton) filming people who were hurt and decides "Hey, I can do this too!"  The rest of the movie is Louis going out every night listening to police scanners for the next big story to sell to the news.  That's the whole movie.  You will find yourself wondering when the big twist will happen because you will think to yourself "This can't be the entire movie...something good has to be happening soon."  It never does!  I don't recommend this to anybody unless you want to watch a boring movie where Louis drives around all night filming horrible accidents just to make money.
831752
This is the first film I've ever given a one-star rating on here. I always try to find some good in a movie, some redeeming quality that makes me like it, but it felt like no matter what happened in this movie, it just made me angrier and more bored.

Let me break it down for you like this: Burt and Vicky, in this film, are a married couple on the brink of utter marital destruction; the character Vicky is the most insufferable shrew one could imagine. Whereas Linda Hamilton's character in the 1984 original was playful, friendly and much more easily able to relate to, this Vicky spends the first 40-45 minutes doing nothing but yelling at her husband, blaming him and insulting him when he didn't even cause a need for her to be upset. Burt is honestly the only character I can relate to in the movie; he's good-natured, patient, strong-willed and is still able to emote like a regular human being (as opposed to his wife who basically does nothing but spew animosity throughout). This isn't a Children of the Corn remake!!! This is "How To Lose A Guy In Ten Days: Hee-Haw Edition"!!!

The evil children in this movie are also very poorly done, especially in comparison to those of the original. The kids in this film aren't very bright and don't do a half-convincing job that they're evil; honestly I just felt like the little suckers needed a good spanking to set them straight. Also, I'm aware that one isn't supposed to like the villain in a horror film, but even as the bad guys, I just wanted to go up to the children and say "I don't like you." That's right, even the villains in this horror film aren't on par with a decently-done villain role. The character of Isaac was just an annoying little shrimp, whereas in the original he was twisted and menacing, and FAR more believable. This film's Malachai also has nowhere near as much finesse as Courtney Gains in the original movie; Malachai here just kinda has no personality and is pretty forgettable as far as being the bad guy that does the dirty work.

What really bothers me about the film, though, is that despite how insufferable the first 45 minutes or so were, halfway through, this movie has the utter nerve to pick up the pace. I wasn't expecting the film to be very exciting, but about 50 minutes in the kids start to attack, Burt fights back in an attempt to rescue Vicky, and all the creepy cult material kicks into play. It's bad enough that half the film wastes our time on pointless bickering, but to turn itself into an almost-decent excuse for a low-budget made-for-television remake of a horror classic just bothered me. It's the equivalence of hearing a musical artist you don't like do a legitimately good cover of a song you do like.

All in all, this was one of the poorest horror movie remakes I've ever seen. The ONLY reason I would suggest that anyone watch it is they, like me, want to complete the Children of the Corn film series. Otherwise, stay FAR away from this garbage. This is just one of those films that shouldn't have been made. In all honesty though, I do think there are some remakes of the 2000's that are legitimately good, such as The Last House on the Left, Maniac and Mother's Day, so give those films a chance before you subject yourself to the torture that is this movie. Thanks for the time, and peace.
2482939
Seriously. I've seen many movies in my day, but none of them (including a certain one about a witch) made me ever look away because I though I'd be nauseous. Seriously, when you have to close your eyes to stop them from straining, something is wrong.

With crappy hand-held realism aside, the movie characters and story were a letdown. I know a lot of it was about this viral marketing rah rah, but who cares ultimately when the movie is dumb?

First of all, the initial scene at the party feature some of the most crappy dialog and scenes to date. I almost fell asleep with how dumb it was. Then when things got moving, the people who we follow on their stupid quest through the city get even dumber! They feel it's perfectly fine to go towards the destruction and to walk under a mega-huge creature that's killing people left and right.

The guy running the camera is one of the most annoying characters in history. He kept saying "Rob! Rob! Rob! Rob! Rob!" over and over. I wanted him to be slapped repeatedly. When they finally get to their final destination, the story keeps up with it's dumbness. A girl impaled? Oh she's fine!

The movie utterly crappy elements could not be redeemed, for me, by anything they put on screen.
288991
Don't believe the bogus positive reviews. THIS FILM IS A SNOREFEST and a complete WASTE of two hrs!! Totally UNREALISTIC and STUPID PLOT, with completely IMPLAUSIBLE situations and scenes that not only insult the viewers intelligence, but move at a SNAILS PACE.
And the WORST PART: a RELENTLESSLY ANNOYING performance by Gyllenhaal, pretending to be Norman Bates. He's in the film 95% of the time, and I wanted to slap him every minute. He is absolutely PAINFUL TO WATCH!!! If I had to endure one more eye bugging speech from his character, complete with tics and nervous laughter, I was gonna scream!! Three of us suffered through this SUPREMELY OVERRATED MESS, with me being the only one who managed to stay awake. The supporting cast doesn't help much either. Jake's character has a one dimensional side kick/employee that also grates on the nerves. And a heavily weathered looking Renee Russo is tossed in for filler and does some lousy emoting. Oh, and this film is also EXTREMELY PREDICTABLE too. You can see certain scenes and the ending coming from a mile away. AVOID THIS MESS of a movie!!
572247
This is one of the worst movies I have ever endured in my forty years alive.
Gia, Franco, and some seriously dumb stories, and nothing to do with the title, nor or city, this depressing convoluted mess is a nonsensical dystopian hell and the lowest rung of teen morons wasting life. Stoned, drunk, destructive and dumb may be the version of Franco's sad misadventures, but as being born and raised in a similar time in PA I can say that many other perspectives would never stay in this gutter ball version, as even if the goth punk stoner tree dropouts had some contrasting experiences, not this one dark portal as depicted so solemnly and pointlessly.
It is a good thing that Gia Coppola has family money to rely on! As the directing on its own is enough to make your stomach churn and feel like you've been food poisoned. And what stories would like thse could or would inspire a movie? Very-very sad, that if this is even a sliver of James Franco's boring and depressing childhood in -- very multifaceted and fun city to grow up in -- Palo Alto, then a story (or stories) best kept in that box in his parents attic. But then the response financially to ticket sales and otherwise spoke volumes enough (750k) to the quality of this film.

I want my 1:40 minutes back!!