Read the following text from a student essay. How can the writer best improve his or her word choice?
I saw a movie called Blob Invasion. It was really good. It was about a weird guy who was into science. He worked on bugs and small animals. He made a machine that did things to the bugs and the animals. They became big weird things. One day he transformed himself by accident. He became a big blob! He went around doing bad things to the city. In the end, a boy figured out how to change the blob back into a man. I would recommend this movie to everyone who likes fun science movies.
by using more specific language by reducing repetitive language
When you review a fellow student's writing, try to make your feedback clear and specific. You can use questions such as the following to guide your feedback:
Ideas and development: Does the writer express a clear main idea and develop it with evidence, examples, and analysis?
Organization: Does the writer order ideas in a clear, logical way so that the ideas build on one another and are easy to follow?
Sentence fluency: Do the writer's sentences vary in structure and length, or does the writing sound choppy, rambling, or repetitive?
Word choice: Does the writer use words accurately and precisely, avoiding excessive repetition or inappropriate language to create clear, effective, and engaging writing?
Grammar and mechanics: Does the writer use accurate spelling, punctuation, and grammar to create writing that is correct and easy to read?
The writer could best improve his or her word choice by using more specific language.
For example, the writer could replace the underlined text with more specific language, such as incredibly entertaining, strange scientist, experimented, invented, transformed, giant slimy blobs, morphed into, giant, oozed, horrible, and all science fiction fans.
I saw a movie called Blob Invasion. It was really good. It was about a weird guy who was into science. He worked on bugs and small animals. He made a machine that did things to the bugs and the animals. They became big weird things. One day he transformed himself by accident. He became a big blob! He went around doing bad things to the city. In the end, a boy figured out how to change the blob back into a man. I would recommend this movie to everyone who likes fun science movies.