Prompt:
 My brother and his wife are having a hard time with paying their rent right now, so they asked if they can stay with us for awhile.

After talking it over with my husband we agreed that they could move into our RV and we could hook up the water and electricity from our house. It’s not a huge RV, but it’s got one full size bed and two twin size beds that their kids can sleep on.

My sil is very insulted by the idea of living out in our driveway when we have “plenty” of space inside. My brother was also upset because family would let family stay with them. He also doesn’t like that he would be the one responsible for taking the RV to the nearby rest stop area to drain the black tank.

They both said they would much rather prefer to stay in our living room or that we could put our kids and one of their sons in our sons room and they can share our daughters room with their younger son. Or maybe have some of the kids camp out in the living room.

None of those options appeal to us. With everything how it is and us all being stuck at home my husband, our kids, and I have gotten on each other’s nerves more than a few times. We feel like taking away our kids private spaces would be really disastrous.

As for the living room my husband and I are both working from home, so we need our own separate areas to focus. My husbands job works with other branches in other countries so he’s often working really late at night or really early in the morning in the living room. So having people sleeping in there wouldn’t work out well.

If they were just staying for a few days we probably could make due with them staying in the living room, but they will likely need to stay with us for weeks, if not months. ######

Response: NTA. They asked for a huge favor and then tried to dictate the terms of it and push back your boundaries. That’s a red flag and suggests their entire tenure in your driveway would be spent with them finding ways to be in your house, in your way and in your wallet. If they don’t like the terms of your offer they’re free to take another one. ######


Prompt:
Sister: sis
Brothers-in-law: bil
Me

I am renting a room in their home and am paying the agreed amount of rent on time. Some info about my sis and bil. They recently had a baby and have another on the way. They are in financial problems because they are constantly updating the house. New flooring, new granite counters, added an addition, etc. additionally, they owe a ton of money to their credit card companies because they are huge spenders.

Now they need more money and are pressuring me to pay them more than the agreed amount. They can barely pay their mortgage and sometimes pay it late. Also they have been eating my food, using my supplies (toilet paper, soap,etc), I help with my niece and cleaning.

on top of everything I have been watching my niece for free for hours. We are all in the medical field. So 12 hour shifts, 3-5 days a week depending on the OT available. So when I watch my niece, I am watching her for 12+ hours, 3 days a week. I haven’t mentioned payment becuase we are family.

But now we are regularly fighting due to Covid workload stress and me being upset about my prepped food being taken. I’m trying to be supportive becuase they are my family but I feel unsafe whenever they threaten to evict me. I don’t have a back up plan right now.

So we are all stressed out for various reasons. AITA for fighting with them at all? Should I be more supportive during this unprecedented time? I feel like I am being taken advantage of here. ######

Response: NTA. They are seriously taking advantage of you here. It sounds like they need your rent check pretty badly, and they need your help around the house and babysitting even more. You are doing way more than is fair to ask of you and they are definitely AHs in return. These times are hard for everyone including you, do not feel the need to take on more than you already are. You sister and BIL should think you are a saint for all that you already do and put up with. ######


Prompt: My mom sent me a video on Facebook known as the "plandemic" video. Basically this video has unproven claims about Dr. Anthony Fauci and the handling of the Covid-19 pandemic. I went to the YouTube channel and saw many other "conspiracy" videos such as how 5G can cause cancer. I decided to report the YouTube channel for being misleading and it got taken down today. At Mother's Day dinner (of all times and places), I brought up how the channel got shut down. She says that I was disrespectful for reporting the channel and that I am essentially her censor. I, however, don't find anything wrong with my actions as these conspiracy theories can be really harmful. Am I the asshole? ######

Response: NTA. These YouTube videos were spreading false information that people might use to do dangerous things. You reported it, YouTube agreed, it got taken down. ######


Prompt:
Before I tell you the story I will say I don't have an issue with people believing what they want. With that said, on with the story.

Before the lockdown I was sitting on my SIL's doorstep talking and a van pulled into our shared driveway (Rural community). A woman got out with a little girl (about 4 or 5). The woman asked if we had thought about what happens after we die. I immediately said, "Thank you but neither of us is interested in converting." I would never speak for my sister in law normally but I knew her thinking on religion and that she has even less filter than I do, so figured since I am the more diplomatic, I should respond.  The woman said ok but then asked if her daughter could read us a verse out of the bible. I had just told her we weren't interested and now I'm irritated but when it comes to kids I have a real soft spot and hate to disappoint them or hurt their feelings if I can avoid it. I looked at my SIL and she just nodded. I said alright and the little girl read the verse (can't remember for the life of me) and thanked her then asked the woman to send her daughter back to the van. Once the little girl got into the van, I looked at the woman and berated her for using her little girl like that and how dare she not accept a no from us after we politely declined. I also told her to never show her face on my property again and to get out (I never swore or threatened her in any way). I then went to the nearest Kingdom hall and told them about it and told them I wanted my address put on the no contact list and that I would tell the next JW that shows up to go away in less than polite wording.

AITA for reacting like that. ######

Response: NTA. Theres nothing wrong with people asking you if you are interested in hearing about their faith, but this woman refused to take your polite no for an answer and tried to use her daughter to get you to listen, which is not okay. Since she was on your SIL property I think It's your right to tell her off for that. It was good/nice of you to make sure the daughter was back in the van first so she wouldn't hear what you had to say to the mother. Let's hope they won't bother you again, or if they do that a polite no tells them off. ######


Prompt:
Sorry if the title makes no sense, but I’ll do my best to explain it.

So basically, my friends dad always comments on things in my life but makes it like things only happen to me because I’m gay. Here’s an example: I’m studying law, her dad said that I’m studying law because “gay people like fucking bad boys” - meaning I only want to be a lawyer so I can have sex with clients. I currently have a cold sore, he said it's because I'm always sucking dick. If he finds out I'm reading a book, he'll tell her that it's "probably a gay porno mag". It's stupid stuff like that.

But it really annoys me. At first, it didn't, but then it didn't stop. I also don't know why my friend tells him this stuff - like me reading a book isn't something worth telling your family about. She's told me that "he's not homophobic, he just doesn't like seeing it." (I know that's an assholish thing to say, that's not what I want to know).

In retaliation, I've ended up saying stuff back like "your dad is just sad that I didn't represent him when he was in trouble with the law," "I got the cold sore from him, he should probably get an STI check," or like "I thought I recognised your dad on the cover of the magazine?". He doesn't find it funny, and he calls me a dick head, or a "poof". My friend also knows I don't like people commenting on my sexuality, or people talking about me when I'm not there.

AITA for flipping his comments to make him sound gay too? ######

Response:
 NTA. Theres no such thing as "not being homophobic but not liking seeing it AND harassing someone for it." He got what we deserved. HE'S the one with the problem. If he doesn't like those jokes towards him, he shouldn't have made them.

Stay strong! ######


Prompt:
This is a weird one, sorry in advance. This was 5 months ago and it’s still a fight my bf and I are having. Clearly since pregnancy and miscarriages aren’t easy topic for people to talk about, I’ve come here.

I (27F) was about 6 weeks pregnant when I started bleeding really heavily randomly. To cut a long story short - I was miscarrying. Didn’t know I was pregnant, wasn’t upset about it. It was really whatever. I have no intention of children, I guess the shot failed me.

They sent me home from the hospital after a mental health check to make sure I was okay. Like I said, wasn’t upset about it, didn’t bother me much besides the physical pain obviously. They gave me the pill that helps to move the process along faster at home instead of waiting. When I was at home and sitting on the toilet, I felt it like fall out. So I just kind of look at for awhile and said “I didn’t think I would be able to see it!” (it was in the sac I think?) My boyfriend then said “stop being so fucking weird about this.” He then accused me of wanting to KEEP IT. When I said “it’s just curiosity, this is new to me too.” He stormed off and said he doesn’t want to be with someone who could be so heartless as not to care about this and treat “him” like a science project.

I asked him if he wanted to be pregnant or have kids and he said no but I should “respect” his kid more than that. I told him it’s happening to me and we just feel different about it. I wasn’t trying to be insensitive, I said sorry at the time but he hasn’t let it go.

Was I the asshole? It was something that was just happening to me and I was curious about it. He’s never hinted he’s wanted to kids or pro life of anything so this attitude is new to me. ######

Response: NTA. there’s no playbook on how you’re supposed to react to a miscarriage it’s a deeply personal experience. Your boyfriend is being immature and weirdly possessive. It just kind of creeped me out how he said you should have more respect for “his kid” like it wasn’t also a part of you. ######


Prompt:
I have a non identical twin brother named Justin. I'm under no illusion that he's the better looking between us. He's a great guy if not a bit philandering.

Since we were bored yesterday, we video called my friend Jay and his wife and we just caught up with each other over a couple glasses of wine. We eventually got to playing this game where someone asks a question and we all answer. I asked everyone who their cheat pass (someone you would cheat with if allowed) is and everyone gave celebrities crushes as expected, except my loving wife. She first asked about specifics. Whether it was just a one time thing, the whole night or a fling. We all agreed on whole night and then she blurted "Then Justin! Omg we'd fuck all night long". We all broke into laughter because we thought she was talking about Justin Bieber.

Jay then made a comment about Timberlake being better than Bieber and my wife clarified that she actually meant my brother. Like wtf? Obviously things got awkward so they ended the call and we got into a fight over it. She said I shouldn't be angry because I was the one who asked her and now I'm judging her truthful answer. I spent the night in the guest room and even this morning she was completely unapologetic and said I should be the one apologizing for being an ass last night and "judging her truth". Aita? ######

Response: NTA. There’s an unspoken rule that you name a celebrity, or some other person you’d definitely never actually be able to do it with, not *a relative of someone else who is there and definitely not your brother in law*. ######


Prompt:
Over the past two years I’ve brought up wanting to meet my (35f) boyfriend’s (32m) best friend a couple times (“I want to meet so-and-so”, and “so when am I going to meet so-and-so?”) and the responses were, respectively, nothing, and “whenever”. Since then I’ve fought about it with him twice and the latest one he told me I’m making a big deal out of nothing, and suggested meeting his friend would “mean something about our relationship,” which, in the end, is true.

I feel like I’m not good enough to meet his friend, that he’s embarrassed of me or maybe he’s embarrassed of his friend (?), that he’s hiding that part of his personality, that he’s ashamed of me, that I’m not good enough, and so on. Maybe he thinks I’ll embarrass him with my being a total idiot? On and on, this is just a slice of the thoughts I have about it.

My bf is very private and likes a lot of space and distance. He doesn’t like talking about himself. The only people in his life who even know I exist are his mom and her husband, and not because we were intentionally introduced. (Met them on our one year anni)

Am I overreacting? Is this not really a big deal at all? I know my feelings are valid, but not sure my perspective is... TIA ######

Response: NTA. There's very few instances where this would be acceptable conduct.  This isn't one of them. I'd stay away from anyone that requires that excessive amount of space after 2 years of a relationship. Emotionally distant people aren't for everyone. ######


Prompt:
I (24M) still live at home, I'm aiming to move out within the next two years.

My sister (18F)  usually lives with my dad but has been spending more time with us, shes been with her boyfriend for 3 years, I've been with my girlfriend for almost 2.

My mother is obsessed with the idea of having a grandchild, she wont stop talking about it with me and my girlfriend but we dont want children.

So, she turned the "joke"  onto my sister.

She brings it up every chance she can.

We were eating dinner last night when my mother once again said "so when are you giving me a grandson *sisters name*?"

This wouldn't be a problem if she wasnt sending my sisters childrens names and if she was joking, she tries to pass it off as a joke but we can tell shes being serious.

My sister genuinely feels pressured, she doesnt have a backbone though so wont complain.

I snapped at my mother and told her to back tf off, she isnt getting a grandchild from either of us anytime soon and maybe she should focus on parenting her son (10) instead of this BS.

She didnt react but later on we heard her crying about it to our dad.

My father texted me and my sister telling us if we cant take a joke and will be disrespectful we both know where the door is and can leave at anytime, and that we are assholes for being oversesnsitve and that I could've let my sister deal with it (she really doesnt like arguments)

AITA? ######

Response: NTA. There's nothing funny about pressuring someone to have a child, especially an 18 yo. ######


Prompt:
So I (25m) and my fiance (29f) are renting the house we live in from my mom (51f) with no written rental agreement. My mom wants us to assume the mortgage from her and we live here for the next 17 years until the mortgage is paid off.

The problem is that fiance and I both have to travel an hour or more to work and mom is using the house as her personal storage unit. Also the house needs a lot of work done to it because whoever added the additions to the house did a terrible job. We don't want to live in the house because we don't have room for our stuff and it is causing our relationship to have unnecessary arguments.

We want to live closer to work especially since I have to be to work at 5am. Whenever we say anything to mom about moving she replies "you won't ever find a better deal than what I'm offering, assuming the mortgage is your best option to own your own house." The last time I mentioned moving she said "how can I afford my camper if you move?"

So reddit WIBTA if fiance and I move? ######

Response: NTA. There's no written agreement and you are not responsible for your mother's camper. ######


Prompt:
 My roommates (21-22F) and I (21F) were tanning in our backyard when my neighbor (N) peeked over our fence to ask about the beehive he found near our garage. Right then, beekeepers (B1/B2) showed up and asked to use our driveway so I left to move my car.

N and B1 then started making sexual comments about my roommate (R) saying they’re only here to "look at the view" and that her bathing suit was "too skimpy". When I came back, my roommates told me what happened and how both men scoffed when R called them out.

My roommates begged me to not say anything but I was pissed. I told the men "The comments you made were not okay. You made a group of young women feel so uncomfortable they no longer feel safe in their own backyard. I don't care if you *think* you did nothing wrong, at the end of the day you made comments towards a 21 year old girl that made her feel unsafe. You would be pissed if some stranger did this to your daughter so learn from your mistakes and don't do it again."

N and B1 tried to apologize but they said “sorry if my words were misconstrued” and I kinda lost my shit. I said "I won’t accept an apology in which you take NO responsibility for your actions. You know what you said and you know it's wrong. I don't care you're from a different generation, you know making sexual comments towards a 21 year old is gross. Think about your behavior, understand why it was wrong, and never do it again."

I'm concerned I took it too far by denying their apologies. My dad said I should have let it go sooner and not pushed the issue. AITA? ######

Response: NTA. There was no apology to accept because there was no apology given. ######


Prompt:
A few days ago, my (16F) mom (50) told me that she recorded me singing in the shower from outside the door. Later, one of her friends was over and asked me if I would sing. My mom said that she showed him the video. I didn't say much then, but today, I brought it up and told her she shouldn't record me without my permission or send it to other people.

She almost immediately started screaming at me, saying she never said anything about showing someone else, and that she recorded it for herself because I never sing for her when she asks. It seems like a pretty big deal to her. I get the feeling now she's going to be mad at me for the next few weeks. AITA? ######

Response: NTA. There something in the air? Lots of moms absolutely losing their shit at their kids for absolute jack lately. ######


Prompt:
So ever since the protests started my brother (19) has been making racist comments to my family about it. I'm (21) a criminal justice major and have learned a lot about systemic racism so I've been trying to help my family understand what's happening and why. I warned my brother to never say any of the stuff that he says around us to anyone else, but he didn't listen.

Sure enough my brother was "exposed" on a girl's Instagram story with screenshots of him saying racist things in a chat with his friends. Since the girl that posted the screenshots was in my grade my family asked me to talk to her and get her to take it down since it may "ruin my brothers college acceptance." I told my family no and that he needs to be publicly ridiculed since nothing that I've said was going to get through to him.

Then the post spread and now practically everyone has seen the message and has been messaging me about it saying things like "wow I can't believe your brother is so racist" and "wow how can you let him say things like this." In response I posted something saying how I do not condone his actions and am deeply disappointed.

Now my brother says that I am "dead to him" and my family won't talk to me because I didn't back my brother and "betrayed the family." I've asked my brother to sit and talk with me about it but he's refusing to and saying that I've done too much damage and that he doesn't want to speak to me again.

My mom keeps telling me that I need to apologize to him in order to make the family "begin to heal" but I don't feel as though I'm in the wrong.

Should I apologize? Am I the asshole here? ######

Response: NTA. There should never be any sympathy for racists; especially for one who refuses to get educated on the issue ######


Prompt:
So...like, in my mind I don't think I'm an asshole but my family is treating me like I have disowned my father for this so here goes:

Around 2017, I cut all of my hair off. All of it. I stopped getting relaxers and let my hair go natural because I really wanted to try it, and I LOVE it. I have kept my hair short and proper since, and I feel a lot more freer with my hair in it's natural, healthy state.

My father, on the other hand, HATES it. Like, despises it. Everytime he has seen me, for like the past year or so, he has to comment on my hair. I've always been nice about it, laughed off his jokes about it, and kind of shrugged them off, but I'm going to be honest, it's started to piss me off.

Today, I walked into the room where he was, and the first thing he says to me is: "When are you going to let your hair grow out and get a relaxer?" Y'all, I'm on my period and I'm cramping so I just let him have it. I told him that I have agency over my own body and that I like the style so I'm not changing it. He looked at me and laughed, then mocked me like a three year old. He was like "You don't have to be rude," and I'm like, "I'm not being rude, I just don't like you talking about my body and my hair choices. I don't tell you what to do with your hair." He looked over at my mom and was like "Why is she so rude?" and she told me that "I wasn't being nice" and I just...I don't know what to think? He says things about my weight and stuff sometimes too and I very rarely say anything to him but the one time I defend myself...I'm the asshole?

Am I really the asshole or am I just...being a bitch about it? ######

Response:
 NTA. There is only so much badgering a person can take. Sorry he's being such a jerk. It sounds like you were firm and clear and probably pretty annoyed, but you stuck to stating that you found his behavior unacceptable and didn't attack him personally. That's completely reasonable and not rude, especially as a response to extremely rude behavior on his part.

I think the only other thing you can do now is just give him nothing to argue with. I'd just stick to "I've explained that I'm not going to discuss this" and leave the room / end the conversation / stop talking to him. ######


Prompt:
I'm in a dilemma because I don't know if I'm acting like a bitch or if it's best to just keep my distance. I have a cousin that I was very close to growing up but is now, to plainly state the truth, nothing more than white trash.

She has never left her parents house but has continued to produce children for her mom to care for. She's my age and doesn't have a tooth left in her fucking head. She's been arrested numerous times for theft and drug offenses, including meth as well as pain pills. She's no longer welcome in my home because she steals every goddamn thing she can lay her hands on.

Every time I try to help her I'm taken advantage of. As in like, stealing from me, borrowing money and not paying it back, or bumming rides from me, which I started refusing because what if I get pulled over and she has drugs in her possession, in my car? And furthermore, I don't really care to be seen in public with and associated with such a person.

I don't know if I'm being a snotty bitch riding her high horse and looking down on her and others like her or if I'm justified in wanting nothing more to do with her. I try not to judge people but she did it to herself. I'm tired of being stolen from and used. ######

Response:
 NTA. There is nothing wrong with protecting yourself and your immediate family from such a person. You also do not have to set yourself on fire to keep someone else warm. She doesn't want help yet, so anything done at this point outside if getting her to rehab is enabling her poor decisions and it is ok to choose to not support her lifestyle.

People rarely tell you that the "tough" part of tough love is not only on the person who needs the kick in the pants, but also on the one doing the kicking. They often get a lot of flack, especially because of faaaaaaaaaamily. ######


Prompt:
Okay so I am a behavioral therapist for autistic kids. And with COVID and everything going on, sessions have been moved around but haven’t stopped. I have this one kid who we will call John. John is 8 years old and very aggressive. My job with John is to help him understand simple things better like time, patience, social cues, etc. This kid had promise when I started, which was about a month before the pandemic. But as the pandemic continue, his behavior has gotten worse. Session is about 3 1/2 hours. The moment I knock on the door I can hear “I DONT WANT TO DO SESSION!” Now, why doesn’t he want to do session? Because he wants to play roblox and fortnite. That’s all he wants to do. Watch YouTube videos about those games and to play them. It takes about 30-45 minutes to get him to calm down because he doesn’t want therapy. He wants to play roblox and fortnite on his xbox. And when we take it away, he will call his mom a bitch.

Now his poor mother, I feel so bad for her. She just wants what’s best for her kid but all he does is abuse her. She tells me that it’s okay because he doesn’t understand but I can see it’s slowly killing her. She doesn’t sleep at all because every 30 minutes or so, the kid will wake her up in the middle of the night for whatever reasons.

Going through this with the kid every single session has started to get to me. I try my absolute best with all my kids, even my non verbals. I want to help them and make sure they are learning, but this kid. I just don’t know what to do anymore. I’m still doing therapy with him and I will still do what I normally do and try to help him but deep deep down I have given up on him. I feel guilty for feeling like this. So Reddit, AITA? ######

Response: NTA. There is nothing wrong with admitting you can't help someone as a therapist, it doesn't matter that it is a child on the spectrum in this case. If you aren't able to help, the best thing you can do is admit it and help the mother find another therapist who can. You've done your best, it hasn't worked, time to let another therapist try. ######


Prompt:
AITA for refusing to go to my sisters wedding?

This happened almost a year ago, but I’m still getting shit for it, so I guess I’ll share here and see where my judgement lies.

So my sister (s) got married to (A), the man who did bad things to me me. We didn’t press charges because he wore protection so there was no
semen for evidence, so the case was somewhat useless already, and we could afford a lawyer. She knew about this before she dated him. She was the first person I went to. Anyway, they ended up dating and got engaged. S asked me to be her maid of honor, but I told her that there is no way I would go to her wedding, and can’t believe she would marry such a horrible man. We both shed a lot of tears that day, but S still insisted she loved A and that he’d changed.

I ended up not going and severing ties with S. Recently, S had a baby and my parents have been giving me hell for my decision, and refusing to meet my nephew or be in any of their lives. AITA? ######

Response: NTA. There is no situation in which anyone should force you to treat your abuser as family. Sorry you had to go through that! *hug* ######


Prompt:
My husband and I are new homeowners and moved into our first home a little less than a year ago.

We’ve had a rocky relationship with one of our neighbors from the start, an older couple— the husband is pretty chill and kind to us but the wife has been confrontational and made sure when we moved in that we knew exactly where our property ends and theirs begins. We’re in a city and our lots are about 2000 sqft each so we’re talking a matter of inches that she does not want us crossing. When we moved in, other neighbors on the street welcomed us and also warned us about her attitude and nastiness. Basically the point being that honestly I am intimidated by my neighbors and do not want to confront them directly.

They have a fire pit in their backyard that is roughly 20 feet from our house. The weather has been getting nicer so they have been using it for recreational use— just to have a fire going while sitting outside and chatting. Naturally being so close, the smoke comes right into our home so we can’t open windows and we can’t be outside in our own yard without being covered in smoke. It has even set off the smoke detectors in our house if any window is opened a crack.

I checked our local laws and any fire pits require a permit and must be 75 ft away from any structure (which is impossible considering the size of our houses and our small yards), and can only be operated from January to May 1st.

I called the fire department yesterday (anonymously) and within 5 minutes they were there and it was put out. I plan to call the fire department whenever their smoke gets into our house/yard. According to local laws they will probably be fined and prohibited from having it entirely if there are multiple complaints.

WIBTA for calling the fire department as many times as necessary to get my neighbors’ recreational fire pit shut down? ######

Response: NTA. There is a good reason for those fire regulations and includes not letting them burn your house down. That’s it. ######


Prompt: So my sister and her BF recently bought vapes. She bought hers for her own money and I don't care that she's vaping. What I care about, though, is that she vapes in our room (we share a room). So we've gotten in an argument about her vaping here. I really hate the fake fruit smell and it's giving me a headache. AITA? ######

Response: NTA. There are plenty of other places where she can vape without causing you discomfort. ######


Prompt:
Got some degree of background, I (30F) was pregnant and miscarried. I now have to have the left over tissue removed from my body. I was only 9 weeks at the time, but I’m obviously hormonal and I’m sad.

My husband (31M) was never excited about the pregnancy. To be honest, it was unexpected. We have no other children and weren’t planning on it any time soon.

I scheduled the appointment and asked if he was available during that time. He confirmed he was, but as the conversation continued he kept bringing up how he was trying to make plans with a friend who’s in from out of town for that evening. I told him I didn’t want to do that.

He still wants to go hang out with his friend. Am I just hormonal? Or is it reasonable to expect him to be a source of emotional support after that? He just saw this friend two weeks ago. ######

Response:
 NTA. There are going to be drugs in your system and you Will not be in shape to socialize. Additionally, you may need help at home.

This is hardcore basic wedding vows stuff and he should tell his friend it's not a good time. ######


Prompt:
AITA?
TLDR; husband can't stand tattoos and won’t let me get one- I’m about to just do it- but he might just break over it.

Hi, I’m F25 and my husband M25 have a good marriage, we’ve had normal marriage problems but I’d like to think we did a good job resolving them through good communication and positive change. (Four years)

Every few months though, we’ve been having the same fight. I want my first tattoo and he doesn't want me to get one at all. The solution here isn’t as easy as “ f him, be a free independent woman, it’s your body, ect”.

1st problem is one of the positive changes in our marriage is me making an effort to make decisions together instead of alone. (ITA story below)
2nd problem is we are both children from strict Mormon backgrounds- though we aren’t Mormon anymore- a lot of his issue is he was made to believe people with tattoos are trashy, immature and criminals.

I’ve tried to compromise. On his end I can’t get one till I’m 30 (um, ok.. dad?). On my end, it’s got to be something small and where people can’t notice it easily. He thinks if I wait till 30 I won’t want one anymore because mature new moms don’t get first tattoos.

I’m about ready to just do what I want where I want, but I’m also not ready to put a rift in our marriage again. AITA if I get one?

Tattoo: just a black, thin line contour of a violet, it’s stem and 1-3 leaves on the end behind my ankle bone.

ITA story: I really wanted a dog he never did- he told me no but told me I could still do it- but it was a feeling of betrayal when I chose to get a puppy. I admit it was selfish, but I wish it didn’t make him feel like I didn’t love him/respect him. He resented me for three months even when he gained real love for that dog after one. ######

Response:
 NTA. There are decisions that as a married couple, a partner is not allowed to make unilaterally. Finances, large purchases, etc. Anything in relation to your own body does NOT fall under that category. Wait until you're thirty? WTF? That is utterly ludicrous, condescending and frankly borderline misogynistic (like you need Daddy's permission as you said). You cannot control what another person wishes to do with their body. Haircuts, hair colors, piercings, tattoos, shaving preferences, cosmetics--these are interpersonal decisions only. The ONLY reason I could see someone saying 'hey let's think about this TOGETHER' is if for example your employer says 'no visible ink or you're fired' and you get a huge face tattoo OR if it is offensive like a swastika. Otherwise--your body, your choice, period. It is controlling--there is no other word for it--controlling to tell a partner what body modifications they can have unless the special circumstances I listed above. Then a spouse has a right to RAISE AN OBJECTION but ultimately the decision is YOURS ALONE.

I cannot stress this enough--a partner, spouse, significant other CANNOT make a unilateral decision about **your** body. Only you can. For someone to try and overstep that boundary is very much getting into 'domestic control' territory. Nope. He cannot make that decision for you--he can only have an opinion about it.

Edit: The puppy thing has no bearing as you are not asking about judgment for that. That is a TOGETHER decision, so you did wrong there, but you are not asking for judgment on that action, just your tattoo. ######


Prompt:
We are muslims and unlike them, I sorta neglect my religious tasks. Sometimes I don’t pray, and sometimes I’m not fasting in this ramadan. So basically, after each feast, my roommates go pray together, and they ask me to join them. I prayed with them before but yesterday and the day before I said nah, I’ll pray by myself (in reality I don’t want to pray cuz I’m lazy), and when I said so, they get annoyed as if I did something rude. One of them even told me that dude cmon pray so you can enter heaven, and so god doesnt punish you. Mate I get it but don’t push me like this or at least be indifferent about me, it’s my problem.

Bonus: When I was living with my family before moving to college, they didn’t enforce me to be completely religious. They told me to do it on if I’m willing to. No matter how much I skipped prayer, they never shamed me for it. ######

Response: NTA. Them trying to enforce their religious practices upon you makes them TA. ######


Prompt:
 My roommates (21-22F) and I (21F) were tanning in our backyard when my neighbor (N) peeked over our fence to ask about the beehive he found near our garage. Right then, beekeepers (B1/B2) showed up and asked to use our driveway so I left to move my car.

N and B1 then started making sexual comments about my roommate (R) saying they’re only here to "look at the view" and that her bathing suit was "too skimpy". When I came back, my roommates told me what happened and how both men scoffed when R called them out.

My roommates begged me to not say anything but I was pissed. I told the men "The comments you made were not okay. You made a group of young women feel so uncomfortable they no longer feel safe in their own backyard. I don't care if you *think* you did nothing wrong, at the end of the day you made comments towards a 21 year old girl that made her feel unsafe. You would be pissed if some stranger did this to your daughter so learn from your mistakes and don't do it again."

N and B1 tried to apologize but they said “sorry if my words were misconstrued” and I kinda lost my shit. I said "I won’t accept an apology in which you take NO responsibility for your actions. You know what you said and you know it's wrong. I don't care you're from a different generation, you know making sexual comments towards a 21 year old is gross. Think about your behavior, understand why it was wrong, and never do it again."

I'm concerned I took it too far by denying their apologies. My dad said I should have let it go sooner and not pushed the issue. AITA? ######

Response:
 NTA. Their saying, "Sorry YOU misconstrued the creepy things I said" isn't an apology, and no one misconstrued anything.

It would have been creepy and inappropriate if they were 24 and stood there making those comments, let alone any other age. Just be careful. There are some pretty big weirdos in the world who don't like getting called out, no matter how justified it was. ######


Prompt: My 3 best friends and I were on our way to the beach earlier today, when my friend who was driving (K) was pulled over for speeding. She has never been pulled over before so she was freaking out a bit thinking the ticket was going to be like $400 and immediately told us we would be splitting this ticket four ways. My friend S basically told her no we wouldn’t be splitting the ticket as we weren’t the ones speeding K was. I agreed  with my friend S that we shouldn’t have to split the ticket. It ended up being a $190 ticket. I told my parents when I got home and they called me an asshole for not splitting the ticket. We had already agreed to pay for gas and are actually now paying $20 each which was a lot more than it should be as a “sorry you got pulled over” bonus but I am now mixed on if AITA or not. ######

Response: NTA. Their lead foot was what caused them to get pulled over. Can't blame that on anyone else ######


Prompt:
I logged my mom's Netflix account on my dad's house (they're divorced) so that me and my brother could watch a movie.

Today I went to the living room and my dad's friends were watching Netflix in my mom's profile and didn't stop even after a told them that.

I called my mom and told her what was going on and she told me we should change the password and since she doesn't know how to do it, I did it.

Obviously after that the series my dad's friends were watching stopped working and asked for the new password, they started asking me what was going on and I pertended I didn't know.

They called my dad and he told me to call my mom (I didn't because I had just talked to her).

Now they are all bummed out about it and I feel kinda bad AITA? ######

Response: NTA. Their boredom is not your problem. You did what your mom wanted you to do. Your dad can get his own netflix account to entertain his friends. ######


Prompt:
I’m 19F, I have a brother who is 22M. My Dad is a really complicated guy and incredibly difficult to get along with. My Dad and my Mom have a terrible relationship, I seriously feel like they hate each other. My Dad and I don’t have a great relationship either, especially because he said a lot of hurtful things to me when I was younger. My brother doesn’t talk to my Dad.

My Mom was talking to me about her favorite subject: my Dad, and how awful their relationship is, and how damaging the relationship has been to her. She said, “when you and your brother were much younger, I went to a therapist and talked about divorcing Dad. And the therapist told me that I was trapped in the relationship because I had children. I would have divorced him and had my own life if not for that.”

This kind of pissed me off. I don’t know what she was trying to say to me. I said, “how do you think I’m supposed to respond to that?” She acted confused and said, “I thought we were just having a conversation.” I don’t remember exactly what I told her after that but it was basically, “it’s not okay to openly tell me that my brother and I are responsible for your unhappiness.” Then I hung up.

I don’t know how to feel after this fight. My Mom and I fight extremely rarely. AITA? Did I take it too personal? ######

Response: NTA. The whole dynamic is messed up, actually. She's treating you as a friend with no part in the conflict while constantly telling you terrible things about your own father. And then, implicitly, she blames you for it, even though it was her choice to have children, not yours.  You were concise and direct and handled this really well, all things considered. ######


Prompt:
Gonna keep this short.

My girlfriend called me a "tan" yesterday. She said it in a really joking way, mimicking that John Mulaney line ("that's what I thought you'd say, you fucking tan"), and it quite took me aback, because I knew her friends used words like that but she had mentioned her father found it tasteless so it surprised me that she used it.

When I pulled her up on it, saying I didn't like that word, she justified it by calling it a joke and then said it was ironic I was trying to control the words she used to describe "the oppressor" and then finally said she couldn't help it if "your tannery was so apparent" or something?

It has become something of a recurring thorn in our relationship, given she often justifies not getting along with someone or finding it difficult to talk to them by saying they are "too English" for her to relate to them or labels petty frustrations as "the Brits getting to me". I get that they're jokes, but she just seems so dismissive and irritated towards all things "tan".

I ended up asking her if she needed people to be just like her in order to get along with them, and in the course of our short discussion I ended up saying it sounded like she was a xenophobe. She's brought that up again quite a few times since and I get the impression I quite hurt her feelings, but honestly I think I was justified in what I said given the context and what she had just said. ######

Response: NTA. The whole “is it or isn’t it racist/xenophobic?” question isn’t really the point. We could debate that all day, and —let’s be real — this sub probably will. What is relevant is that your gf continues to insult and “joke” with you even after you get expressed that it’s hurtful to you, and then when you had a serious conversation about how those words made you feel, instead of listening, she made herself the victim. That’s not healthy relationship behavior. ######


Prompt:
My cat eats meals and only gets a certain amount of food a day. He acts like he’s starving all the time. I even brought him to the vet and the vet said he was the perfect weight and he wasn’t sick, he just likes to eat. And if he ate more he would be fat.

My family thinks that the cat is not getting enough to eat. They try to sneak him food behind my back. I tell him he’s getting plenty to eat but they say it’s cruel to leave a cat feeling this hungry, he’s begging food off people and looking for food all the time. They think he should be eating more, at least another can of food at lunchtime, and again I’m being cruel to him and not giving him what his body needs.

AITA? ######

Response: NTA. The vet said he is fine and that's what matters. Cats can be very good at begging for treats, mine will beg from anyone eating in a way that makes you think they haven't eaten in days, even when there is a bowl of cat food in the next room that they are ignoring. ######


Prompt:
I'll try to keep it short. I was using my boss's personal truck for a 4-month long work project. He's the President of the company. That project ended at the end of January. I got quotes before the end of the project on getting it shipped back to him because I knew he'd put it off and I'd get stuck with his truck and a bunch of work equipment, and I wanted to avoid that.

But he just brushed the quotes off and I got stuck with it anyway. He lives 13 hours away from me btw. 8 weeks go by and due to world events, we can't get any work. I get laid off. During that call when he's laying me off I tell him he needs to make arrangements to get his truck and the equipment back. He says he'll work on it. After another lie about when I'll be receiving my last check (no severance), I had to wait 6 days from being laid off to get the last of my pay and expenses reimbursed. At this point, I've had his truck for 9 weeks, and he's made no attempt to come to get it.

I don't want his truck parked in front of my house anymore. I email him and tell him he has 14 days to get his truck, or arrange for it to be shipped, or I'm going to take it up to the airport, and valet park it so it can be locked and the equipment kept safe, and he can retrieve it when he's ready.

He never emailed me back, but I did see an email he sent another coworker about it, and apparently he doesn't understand why I just won't hold onto his truck and the equipment for a few more months and I've got a bad attitude. and if they got work again he couldn't see bringing me back because he couldn't work with someone in the future who had this kind of attitude.

he's got two days left. but I've not been contacted by him.

so, am I the asshole? ######

Response: NTA. The title made it sound like a revenge thing, but it sounds like you've repeatedly given him opportunities to arrange pick up of the truck and, when that failed, warnings that you're going to leave it at the airport. If he's not an idiot, he'll contact you in the next 48 hours. If he is an idiot, you're NTA for following through. ######


Prompt:
I am a 15 year old  boy with three siblings.  One of them is a girl. For the longest time me and my brothers 14 and 13 had to share a room and my sister always got her own separate room. The girl is 12 years old. Now that we are moving in with our mom new husbands my mom promised me that I would finally get my own room.

The other two boys are happy because they get more space and those boys are best friends. My sister is obviously gets her own room cause she is girl. So when we moved in we realized that it's a three bedroom house and my mom lied. Us boys are furious as we have to share the small room and my sister gets the second largest and my parents the master. The room is enough to fit us and our stuff has to go in the attic to make space.

This is a huge issue as none of us kids are going to have a proper area to study and we are fucked if one of us has a nightmare and screams in the middle of the night which was an issue in the past. I complained and tried asked my mom if we wear going to have at least the master bedroom in which she refused and told me it's my husband and mine room then told me that you should be grateful that you are having a place to stay and sleep as the homeless person don't even have a house to sleep in ######

Response: Nta. The three boys should get the largest room, parents the second largest and sister the smallest. You mum is a complete ass for lying to you ######


Prompt:
We need social work credits to continue our studies. I used to go to an autism centre every week to help around, and everything was ok until the pandemic started.

Having no way to access the usual centers, and school being online, the teacher that is in charge of the social work decided that instead of postponing some stuff, or even extending our second year’s social work a bit, we should all donate a pantry each.

And I know it could help a lot of people. 100 pantries are a nice help... but many people can’t even afford their own food, their families not having a job because of quarantine. It doesn’t affect me as much, but it’s still quite a lot of money that is going out of my wallet, money which I could really use this quarantine.

They didn’t even consider other options for a second. They just stated that we had to do it, and if we don’t, good luck working for the school if you want to graduate.

Oh, also? It isn’t even as if they made the announcement and gave us some time to sort things out. They simply dropped in, told us to go to school to give the pantries on Monday, and it’s been complete radio silence since then. ######

Response: NTA. The teachers hearts are in the right places but you are 100% correct that not everyone can afford food for themselves, let alone someone else. Have you emailed this concern to your professors or dean? I assume so since you said there’s been radio silence. ######


Prompt:
Ive been rooming with my sister for 2 years now, and I’ve been having an issue since she moved in. She has a friend who smells AWFUL. Like hasn't bathed in weeks, ran through an onion field awful... who she has spend the night regularly. I cannot stress how bad this guy smells. He walks in to my house and his BO literally smacks you in the face. I cant even walk by my sisters bedroom door without gagging.

Anyways. Every time he comes over, she allows him to sleep on my living room couch, and i swear I can smell him on it weeks after he’s left. I’ve asked her before to get him a cheap air mattress if she wants him to spend the night, which she did, but they popped it on the first night And she has yet to replace it. (I’ve asked multiple times)

I’m at the point where I’m about to tell her that he can’t stay anymore. He’s ruining MY furniture with his stench. Any time I try to bring it up to her, she just says “You’ll survive” AITA for asking her to not have her friend spend the night anymore??

Note: He’s been told by multiple people that he stinks, and he doesn’t seem to care. Her tellong him won’t solve anything. ######

Response:
 NTA. The smell of stale ass, weeks of sweat, no deodorant use, not washing sweaty clothes and sour milk just lingers and lingers. (I've been around people who have smelt that bad) and it's horrible.

God I already wanna get some air freshener for your house and just spray down everything.

But yeah if it's your house you're allowed to tell people to not come over.

Also tell her she can pay you for the new air mattress and the laundry detergent and stuff it's costing you to wash and probably re wash all your stuff. ######


Prompt:
Me and my sister (both 17, I'm her brother) made an agreement one day when my parents weren't home. I'd invite whatever friend I have that my sister thinks is the hottest, and she'd invite whatever friend of her's that I think is the hottest. Then we'd all go skiny dipping. It was mostly so we could see someone we each find hot naked, and possibly we'd each hook up with that person after.

We invited them over, all went skiny dipping, and then got out. She hooked up with my friend and I hooked up with her friend in each of our bedrooms. My sister is open with her mom about sexuality so she told my mom all of this. My mom was cool with it until she realized me and my sister went skiny dipping together. Our parents think its very weird and inappropriate for me and my sister to skiny dip together and see each other naked.

Neither of us cared and we focused on the other people in the pool. My parents are really mad, but only because me and my sister skiny dipped with each other and were nude in front of each other. ######

Response: NTA. The sibling nudity thing is a bit odd, but your collective scheme is genius. ######


Prompt:
My sister unfortunately passed away suddenly recently and there will be a funeral soon. Unfortunately, though, because of the Rona situation, the EU commission decided to ban Americans and later most of hte world from entering the EU unless they have valid business or diplomatic reasons to be here. Mostly its some sort of visa or residence permit and at the moment my visa is expired, and  I am in the process of trying to get a residence permit. I live and study in Poland.

Almost all of my family is fucking pissed i wont go back to the US for the funeral but I cant. If i leave, I cannot reenter hte EU. I have explained this concept so many times to some of these thickskulled dumbasses who still don't understand. Others are saying I'm selfish for this. If i can't reenter the EU i can't continue my studies here.

I've suggested of other things i could do, i could skype or watch a live stream of the funeral or something, i want to go but i can't. I had a massive argument with some of my relatvies after explainign this the 5th time to him and i ended up cursing him out. ######

Response:
 NTA. The rules about limited travel are to protect lives,  it would be a terrible irony if you were to somehow spread a fatal disease in order to attend a funeral.

If you are okay with not going then it is your choice. Sorry for your loss OP. ######


Prompt:
Some context: My and my bf are in high school and the girls he’s dated before me have straight hair, I’ve had curly hair my whole life and take after my mom, but she always straightens hers and once I got to 9th grade I used to always straighten mine too because I never really knew how to handle it. A couple months ago though I decided to just let it be natural. I wash/comb it thoroughly it every 3 days, but sometimes it can still get messy and frizzy.

The issue is that I started dating my bf 6 months ago and he never knew that my hair was naturally curly, so once I stopped straightening it he was surprised and asked why I never told him. Now when we’re videocalling he sometimes makes jokes about it being frizzy and “oh is there a bird hiding in it” Eventually I got annoyed and told him to stop. He complained that I deceived him by straightening my hair and not telling him it was actually curly.

I got really mad and told him he was being ridiculous. AITA? ######

Response: NTA. The real world is going to hit him hard when he finds out about hair dyes, lipstick, and eyeshadow. ######


Prompt:
Loaned niece $1000 for her wedding expenses a few years ago; my sister asked for the loan on her behalf because she was too proud/shy... but when I said yes niece thanked me profusely. Niece has never paid any of it back, but sister paid just over half of it for her until I said STOP because it's not her debt (my sister barely makes ends meet).
FFWD to now; no family get togethers lately due to COVID, so no bday gift (usually a card with around $100) for niece back in March. After recently dropping off a gift at sister's for another family member, niece tells her mother "Oh, well, Uncle didn't get me anything for my bday".
I admit that I still think about the money owed -not hurting for it, but just the principle of the thing and that I feel taken for granted ...miffed that not even an attempt has been made by her to pay ANY of it back. So I was thinking 'fuck it' and would skip her $ present this year (maybe she would subtly get why, perhaps?). I'm pretty annoyed that she would bring it up to her mother like that; she is 25 years old now! However, in the interest of not causing a rift with my sister (or possibly the rest of the family), I am debating giving her belated birthday $ at the next family function... thoughts? ######

Response: NTA. The principle is the important thing, but also you should let her know that. Shes an adult, and if she can get married, she can pay back loans. ######


Prompt:
So I'm actually torn about this one. I've been dating Mae for two years, and I'm very close to proposing. She's just amazing but blended families always suck. I have a 10 year old daughter and an 8 year old son who she really makes an effort with. My son is much more receptive then my daughter. She was more effected by the divorce and both kids have been in therapy for it. I'd say for the most part my son likes Mae though he has moments of getting upset that she isn't his mom. She doesn't try to parent them, but he still lashes out sometimes and my daughter doesn't like her very much.

Anyway she put some body lotion on before bed and I guess the kids put itching powder in it. They didn't do the best job because I found the empty packet in the trash. Now it's not the end of the world. I have a little bit of an issue because I don't think it was completely done out of fun, but I asked her how she felt and what she wanted me to do. She was pretty understanding and didn't want me to punish them, but she said we should prank them back so I switched out the sunscreen and the lotion and let the kids use it the next day.

We laughed at them a little, but we weren't assholes about it. I explained that they don't get to be mad because they did the same thing to her. My son apologized. My daughter didn't, but since we pranked them back I didn't push it. Anyway I got an irate call from my ex after they went home and she said my daughter was crying and that we are "bullying" the kids. So AITA? ######

Response: NTA. The prank was not malicious and you simply did the same to them as they did to Mae, so if your ex wants to call it bullying then she needs to speak to the kids about how they started the bullying. Honestly, I think this teaches a better lesson than punishment would- it was harmless regardless if the kids were trying to be mean or not. If you were to punish them, I’d worry they wouldn’t feel comfortable doing silly, harmless pranks in the future out of fear of punishment. Every household should be able to have fun, they just need to know when something becomes too much or disrespectful. You should still have a talk with them to ensure they understand the difference between a prank and straight up bullying. ######


Prompt:
My dad let me borrow his power washer to get my driveway and deck cleaned off. While I was in the middle of spraying my driveway, the guy across the street walked over and asked if he could use it to do his back deck/shed. I have never spoken to him or his family, he’s never even waved or acknowledged me when we’re both outside. I politely just said it wasn’t mine so I wasn’t comfortable and I would be returning it to the person I was borrowing it from when I was done (which is all true).

The neighbor directly next to me came over to me later in the day and told me it was kinda rude (he was bitching to her I guess?) and that I should’ve just let him use it. Maybe irrelevant but I am F (24) and he was well into his 50s. And again, never even spoken to him before! Did I overreact? AITA? ######

Response: NTA. The power washer wasn’t yours to loan so you were simply being courteous to your father by not loaning it out to your neighbour. You were perfectly polite in explaining that, it isn’t your fault that your neighbour decided to be a jerk. You’re good, OP. ######


Prompt:
So my younger sister (19) got engaged to her boyfriend on February 20th. This came as a shock to my whole family because they were only dating about two weeks. That event alone caused a lot of drama and my sister was very upset about the lack of support and excitement. I tried being there for her and gave her a gentle nudge to maybe have a long engagement. Now just last week my (24f) boyfriend (25m) of three years proposed. We waited until last night to tell all of our family members over FaceTime and oh man did shit hit the fan. My sister was livid and accused me of trying to take the spotlight away from her. She claimed her boyfriend obviously loved her more since he proposed before mine and that I was just jealous. She was also pissed at my family for being more supportive of my engagement and was posting all over social media about having toxic family. I guess I didn’t really think about how close our announcements were so I can kind of see her point but I wasn’t thinking how she thinks I was. My fiancé and I have been talking about marriage for a year now and apparently he’s had the ring for months.

AITA? Or maybe just insensitive? ######

Response: NTA. The period between their engagement and yours was significantly longer than her entire pre-engagement relationship. ######


Prompt:
AITA for removing the tip until my things are delivered and then tipping the deliverer?

So, I need a lot of things delivered to me as I can't go out due to chemo and the fact that I'm currently immunocompromised has me needing a lot of things that I pay to have delivered. What I do to get my things delivered faster is add a large tip ($50.00+, I can afford it) and then it's snatched up and I get my things quicker.

Once I have the person who will deliver my things, I change the tip to $0.00, and wait until they arrive and tip them the same amount in cash. The delivery services I use take between 5 and 15% of the tip and I'm not tipping the company, I'm tipping the person who's taken time out of their day to bring me things. I've never stiffed someone, I just prefer to know that the full amount I want to tip them ends up in their pocket and I don't trust the government. I did waitressing and I never got the full tip and I know people are hurting.

I mentioned it to a friend and she got angry and said that I was scamming the company and misleading my delivery people but the way I see it is that the company charges me extra for my groceries and takes a delivery fee from me, then they want to charge the deliverer. I know for a fact from all of my delivery people that they're not charged if they don't get a tip so why should I pay the company an additional amount?

Obviously I'll change if the company policy charges but until then, they're not taking any more from me and paying their drivers scraps. I also believe that cash is better so that's what I do.

AITA for removing the tip until my things are delivered and then tipping the deliverer? ######

Response: NTA. The only way you'd be the A is if you didn't tip at all or tipped substantially lower. Honestly I just always leave tip blank and tip in cash at the end, and have never had a shopper take too long or mess things up. I read an article yesterday that many people are doing the big tip in app thing then totally stiffing the shoppers, which is repugnant. I know you're not doing that - so good on you! ######


Prompt:
I know the title sounds absolutely ridiculous and to be honest the situation is actually ridiculous so I’ll try my best to explain.

Me, my sister and her boyfriend are currently renting a house together, we all do our part and we all equally pay the rent.

The house we are renting has a fucking massive backyard.

Well one day, I was sat in the yard drinking my coffee when I had an epiphany.

I want to order a bouncy castle for my 21st birthday in a couple days time.

Yes I’ll be 21 and yes it is incredibly childish of me but god dammit we’re in quarantine and I want to do nothing more than get drunk hop on a bouncy castle and jump to my hearts content.

I am a massive fucking child I know.

I told my sister about the idea and she’s completely against the idea. She told me that it’s  immature and the only person who will get enjoyment out of my birthday will be me and that her and her boyfriend won’t enjoy it

I know for a fact that her boyfriend would love it and she’s a god dam liar.

But every time I look into the garden, all I see is the potential it has to have a wicked bouncy castle in it. My sister also claims that I’ll be embarrassing myself to the neighbours when they look out the window and see a 21 year old girl having the time of her life on a bouncy castle.

Money also isn’t an issue either and we are all thankful to have jobs and I do have the money to spare.

So, will I be the asshole if I go ahead and live my bouncy castle dreams? ######

Response: NTA. The only person who will get enjoyment out of it? Uh. It’s your birthday. Enjoy the hell out your bouncy house! ######


Prompt:
Ok so I am neither the parent nor the son in this story. This happened between my father and my brother and it’s kind of split the family. It happened a few months ago but still gets brought up so I was hoping to get Reddit’s take on the situation. For the sake of making it easier to read I’ll be writing from my dad’s perspective.
***

So I (57M) recently discovered my younger son (24M) has been hiding a snake in his bedroom. My two sons (24M and 27M) both live with my wife and I rent-free in our home. All I ask from them is that they help with household chores and respect me and their mom.
My younger son has wanted a snake ever since he was 6. In that time my sons have had a myriad of pets. Over the 20-some years we have been in this house we’ve had dogs, cats, a turtle, countless fish, and frogs.
The only animal I’ve ever said no to is a snake. I don’t like them. I don’t like how big they get and how potentially dangerous they could be to our other pets if my son isn’t careful — and he has a history of not being careful. My father in law at one point considered letting my son get a snake to keep at their house. Fine, so long as it isn’t in my house.

One day while putting mail in my son’s bedroom I noticed that there was a weird glow coming from the corner. I went to look at it and found that he had an aquarium set up with a ball python.
I had words with my son and within a few hours he had sold it to someone who apparently has a lot of snakes that she raises.

My son was very upset to give up his snake. His girlfriend still won’t talk to me and I think even my wife has doubts about whether we did the right thing. I stand firm that I did what was right. I told him no snakes and he went and got a snake and then tried to hide it from me.
So reddit, AITA? ######

Response:
 NTA. The only animal you've ever said no to is a snake so he goes and gets one and hides it from you?

That's so disrespectful. ######


Prompt:
I (23F) got laid off from my job as of yesterday. Without giving out too much information I was a health care recruiter living in a major city where everything has been hit pretty hard. Naturally, we expected there to be layoffs.

Unfortunately out of about 35-40 people in my company I was considered apart of those layoffs as of 6 PM yesterday. I was upset, as most could imagine because I no longer had an income or a job that I loved.

I intended to go through all my candidates / clients today and transfer them over to a new recruiter, “Mary”(23F), so that they weren’t left without a point of contact and so that they knew what was going on.

Before I had a chance to contact my candidates Mary reached out to them to let them know “ I’d been promoted “ so therefore she’d be “taking over as their recruiter from here on out”. I proceeded to receive over 20 text messages congratulating me on my promotion and wishing me the best.

I had no idea she had done this until the end of day today when Mary said it’d just be an “easier transition” if people thought I was promoted. I told her it was was an asshole move because after getting laid off extremely out of the blue in unprecedented times I had everyone working for me “congratulating” me on my promotion.

My parents think she was just being cautious of my best interests but I’m still really hurt, so AITA ? ######

Response: NTA. The move added insult to injury. Her intentions may have been innocent, but she should have thought about the ramifications of going that route and telling people you had been promoted. ######


Prompt:
So it was my birthday on Friday and my mom gave me £50 because she didn’t know what to get me. So I spent it on clippers, toothbrush, new joggers, vitamin tablets and pumice stones to help get rid of dead skin due to me recently taking up jogging.

So when all my stuff arrived my mom went ape shit. She said “why don’t you buy some clothes instead of wearing the usual stuff you wear. You always look like a tramp.” (Consider were on lockdown and I’m lounging about the house in river island/top man clothes.) she said the clothes that I wear are crap (material often 100% cotton) and trampy. She heavily suggested I go on stores like Nike, Adidas etc where two shirts cost almost £50+ overall.

So I said “no, you gave me money to buy what I wanted for my birthday and I’ve done exactly that. I don’t care about your opinion on my clothes because you never fucking like what I buy anyways so either way I’m fucked.” Then she got even more upset at me. Like, I buy clothes from places where you can often get a pack of 4 t-shirts for £20. She expect me to get TWO FOR £50!!

Am I the asshole for not spending my birthday money as my mom intended? ######

Response: NTA. The money was a gift, and you deserve to spend it however you want. And honestly, you got a lot of practical items that will help your life out. I'm sorry your mom reacted like that, but you seem to be a lot more financially responsible than her. ######


Prompt: My siblings and I all have different fathers.  One is older than me by 4 years and the other is an infant.  I am 20.  My maternal grandmother whom I have never met according to the attorneys felt bad about the way my dad denied me b/c I was a product of an extramarital affair. My fiance who comes from a heap load of money told me not to tell anyone that I have money. I didn't listen I told a friend who told my brother and now he thinks he should have some. I told him no b/c what makes him think he deserves it we are no close never have been and have been estranged for the last 3 years not having spoken maybe once or twice and the last time I saw him he called me a whore b/c my fiance much comes from a well to do family.  Now my mom is saying I owe her for raising me.  I told them both to kiss-off. My mother b/c she wouldn't even buy me things like a winter coat in h.s. (I wore the same ill-fitting one from middle school while she and my brother (the GC) had all the latest everything)til I could get a job and buy my own.  I told my brother he has no claim to the money b/c we don't even have the same father.  He says he thinks it's only fair that I share, I told him if the shoe were on the other foot he would not share.  He said so what, that the amount I got could go around a few times over.  I said my grandmother gave it to me, and I'm saving it for myself and my future children.  My fiance and his family say I'm doing the right thing, AITA? ######

Response:
 NTA. The money is yours, and you don't have to give money to people just because they think they deserve it. But your fiance was right, you never should have told anyone you had it!

Editing to add don't argue with anyone about this, just refuse to discuss it with them. Finances are personal. ######


Prompt:
I've always hated my name because it's really uncommon and my teachers and even some of my friends pronounce it incorrectly (even after several corrections). I eventually got sick of it and researched legal name changes and the procedures and decided to save up for a name change after asking my mum and dad (to which they answered yes).

Last week I told my parents that I'd saved up $300 from chores and my birthday money. I told them that it's more than enough for the name change with post, handling etc. and they told me how proud they were about me being able to handle money like that.

Beginning of this week, I gathered up almost all the ID that I needed and put it in a folder. I couldn't find the envelope with my money so I started asking my parents and they told me they hadn't seen it. I looked all around the house and couldn't find the money. The entire time, my parents just sat there watching me and didn't help look for it when I asked. In the end I just gave up and thought it would turn up some time or another.

This morning my parents took me aside and told me that they needed to tell me something. They said that we'd be going to a ski resort in a few week's time, and that they'd used my money to pay for some of it because "we all need to do our bit because we're a bit tight on money right now". I was furious. I started shouting at them for taking my savings without telling me and using it for something that we didn't even need. They argued that I'm an ungrateful bitch for wanting to change my name that they'd chosen for their little girl and that I'd grown up with it and never complained until now. I left the room and took a walk, during which my parents proceeded to text all our relatives and friends about the incident.

I came back to find my phone blowing up with 200+ messages from my aunts and uncles telling me I should apologise for being so petty and thankless. I have no idea what to do and I haven't talked to my parents since then. So reddit, AITA? ######

Response: NTA. The issue isn’t your name, they knew about that already so that doesn’t excuse them, the issue here is stealing your money. At the end of the day, that’s your savings and taking it for anything you’re not ok with is just wrong. ######


Prompt: I (F 20) just moved in with my boyfriend due to some unstable conditions at home about a month ago. Due to Quarantine, I do my 9-6 job from home. My boyfriend (22) is unemployed and finishing his degree from home. Now when he has class, I do not bother him in the slightest. I stay quiet and respect him. I work so I can support him until he can get a stable job. Recently he’s been done his school work around 12 and has nothing to do so he plays video games until I get off work at 6. I have to work in the same room as him due to the house set up and where my desk is. There is no way around this. I would not care if he was playing video games if he wasn’t screaming and taking to his friends loudly during the game play. I make a lot of phone calls to important clients and I cannot trust him to stay quiet and keep a professional environment in the background. I have asked him multiple times to stay quiet and he just does not. I asked him to do anything besides play video games, like even watch a show or get some house/yard work done. He refuses to and says he should be able to spend his time how he wants. He acts like a child. WIBTA if I put my foot down and demand respect? ######

Response: NTA. The issue isn't that he's playing games, it's the way he disrupts your day while playing. Can you afford to move out on your own, since you're apparently paying his rent? If there's a credible threat of you bouncing and him being stuck unable to pay the bills, maybe he'll take you seriously. ######


Prompt:
My nephew is staying with me for the summer.  My brother is a single parent and I have the summer off work so to help my nephew is staying with me just for the convince and so the 13 year old isn't alone all summer.
My nephew has his own cell phone and I thought the Dad still had it locked at night. So my surprise I caught my nephew on his phone at 1 a.m.  Told him smarten up and go to bed.  Texted his dad just to figure out what is going on.  His dad told me to take the phone away and look threw it.  I am not a parent so I was a bit uncomfortable.
Well I found out my nephew was on discord talking to significantly older people.  There were several inappropriate interactions.   The person he kept messaging tried to voice chat 5 times the frist night I had the phone.
Now my nephew is now pissed cause he banned from discord and his phone.  Saying I had no right to go threw it.
AITA for going threw his phone and enacting the ban. ######

Response:
 NTA. The internet of 2020 is a scary place for a 13 y/o to be. ESPECIALLY discord. There are many predators who use discord to prey on younger kids. It was good you banned him from discord since 1) someone older than him is contacting him and obsessively calling him and 2) you can stop anything harmful that may happen to him. As someone who’s been manipulated by older people on the internet when I was younger, I wish someone banned me from an app older people were contacting me on. There is no reason someone significantly older should be close to a 13 y/o (well expect like close family but you get the idea).

Talk with your brother about his kid’s internet history and send him photos of what the convos are and who he is in contact with so he can be wary. Hope this situation goes well! Much love xx ######


Prompt:
Yesterday my husband told me that he wasn’t feeling that great, his head hurt and his stomach was bothering him. I told him that’s fine, I’d handle the kids, he could rest. But the issue became that he chose to rest on the couch, in the living room. We don’t have a huge house. Our living room is where most of our kids’ toys are, their books, activities, etc. Our kitchen and living room are also open concept so you can see into one another. Keeping the kids cooped up in their rooms all day wasn’t easy so my husband could rest without being disturbed (and he did ask me to make sure they didn’t). But I did it, because it’s one day.

Then this morning, I got up and went into the living room. He was already on the couch and watching TV. I asked how he was feeling and he said not much better, he was debating a doctor’s appointment for Monday. I said that’s fine but if he was going to spend another day laying down, it had to be in our room. We have a TV in there (albeit smaller), and it’s just easier for me to have more room for the kids to run around. He said that he was the sick one, why should he have to be in his room? I said for just that reason, if you’re sick, you should be in bed. I told him I’d still care for him in our room, but for our kids’ sakes, this was easier. He got mad at me, but went back to bed.

All throughout the day I got comments about how loud the kids were being and that he was trying to rest, and this is why he wanted them in their rooms. I tried to keep them as quiet as possible but they’re between the ages of 2-5. It’s not easy on top of everything else I had to do today (like clean the house, cook,etc.) When I dropped off his dinner, he told me I made him feel worse.

Am I an asshole for what I did today? ######

Response: NTA. The identity of the actual two year-old is up for grabs here. ######


Prompt: So last year I moved in to a new apartment with two friends. I was the one who provided most of the essentials such a washing machine, tv and (most importantly to the story) a small fridge that wasn't made for 3 person but that we managed to get by with. Shortly after I realized that I had a different lifestyle than one of my friend and so she decided to move out (I however have 0 problem with my other friend). When she left, she found a guy on a facebook page that was looking for a place to stay and since things were going really fast and I was caught up with school I accepted to let him. So things go by and I don't really like the guy, but I have no specific reason to besides the fact that I'm not too comfortable with living with a complete stranger. He's always using my TV and Switch when I'm not on them and while it's not an offence or anything, it just really gets on my nerves. After a while of him living here, he found a bigger fridge from someone at his work and brought it to the apartment, at the time I thought I'd sell my fridge, but decided to keep it in case I wanna move out so I kept in an open corner of the kitchen. Flash forward to a month ago from right now, I wake up, go to the kitchen an see that my small fridge is missing, after asking around I learn that the guy sold it without even telling me! So I get really angry, confront him about it saying that he shouldn't have done it and he instead replies that I'm in the wrong and that I shouldn't accuse him (he's basically saying that since he cleans more than me and since he brought the bigger fridge he was entitled to it.) I finally got him to pay me back, but things have been really cold between us since and the mood in the apartment changed drasticly (especially with the lockdown!) Since he's not on the papers for the apartment, I decided to tell him to move out cause I don't wanna live with him anymore and I gave him a 2 months time to find a new place to move to. Am I the asshole here? ######

Response: NTA. The guy literally sold your fridge! You gave him two months to leave and his name isn't even on the papers for the apartment, so it's perfectly reasonable. ######


Prompt:
I’m (22F USA) quite embarrassed of this situation and need help finding if I’m the asshole.

I quit my full-time job about a week ago because I am pursuing my bachelors degree and cannot balance my  homework while also working more than 40 hours a week. The financial situation this has caused makes it so I can no longer afford groceries. My boyfriend also lives with me and he is being generous and still makes about 1,500 a month which almost covers everything so we are using my savings so we can keep our car and a roof over our head.

In a desperate need to get food, I started going to my local food bank. I told my dad over the phone and he called me an asshole claiming that if I was less lazy and did not quit my job I wouldn’t be stealing from the poor. Keep in mind my father works for a large corporation making hundreds of thousands a year and does not help me financially in any way since I was 18.

I am starting to feel like TA after that phone call, but my boyfriend keeps telling me he’s an ass. Reddit, AITA? ######

Response:
 NTA. The food bank is there for people who can't afford food, and that's you. you're not stealing from the poor. i worked full time while i put myself through college and it was not sustainable; you made the right decision to prioritize school.

once you're back on your feet again you can donate to the food bank to return the favor :)

 it sounds like your dad has some weird shame around you accessing the food bank but that's his issue, not yours. ######


Prompt:
AITA For Yelling at a Trans Coworker?

I (22F) have been working at a clinic with Samantha (25F) for the past few months. Recently, Samantha came out to me as a Trans woman (male to female for anyone unaware), and has been super close to me ever since. I don’t have any problems being friends with her, and can understand some of her struggles, but her being Trans isn’t what bothers me. What bothers me is that, ever since she came out to me, she’s gotten very touchy.

I was diagnosed with Asperger’s Syndrome as a child. Because of that, I have an aversion to touch. Unless I trust and know you, I don’t want your physical affection. To me, being touched by people is the equivalent to having bugs crawl up your arms. Sometimes, it makes me want to vomit. **I. Don’t. Like. Being. Touched.**

That being said, what Samantha does isn’t exactly bad. She’ll play with my hair, rest her head on top of mine, and just touches me around the head/face area. I guess these are normal behaviors between girls, but it still makes me uncomfortable. I’ve told her several times to stop and that I don’t like it. She just keeps touching me.

Today, she was playing with my ponytail without my permission (again), and I initially told her to stop, to which she replied jokingly, “What are you going to do about it?” I got so mad, I ended up shouting, “Stop touching me, or I’m going to have a fucking panic attack!” She looked really hurt and dejected after I yelled at her, and just left without saying anything.

I know the only reason she feels so comfortable with me is because she knows I’m also LGBT, the only other coworker that is, on top of being the only other female that works there, and that may make her feel safe or give her a sense of belonging. Or maybe other girls were fine with this in the past or it seems like normal social behavior. I don’t know. I just hate being touched.

TL:dr: I snapped at a Trans Coworker for touching my hair, and her feelings got hurt. AITA? ######

Response: NTA. The fact that she is trans is irrelevant. She did not respect your clearly and repeatedly stated personal boundaries. ######


Prompt:
So I dated a YouTuber.

We went out for about a year and it was alright but they were so emotionally invested in their channel that they constantly neglected me and made me feel like I wasn't a priority.

Not really important why we broke up, but we broke up.

Then I get a bunch of messages from friends about 3 months later telling me to go to their channel. I'm pretty much done with them but I do and I realise they made a video about me where they claim I was emotionally abusive.

I continued to get messages from strangers telling me how awful a person I was and how they hoped I died through various means.

So I sued my ex.

It ruined them. I knew they were financially in a bad spot and they likely couldn't afford court fees but the case dragged.

They made a video about not being able to afford court costs and such and how it was going to ruin them.

After which a bunch of friends started telling me to just let it go and move on but I had sunk money into the case as well. It wasn't cheap for me either so I didn't just let it go.

Eventually the judge ruled in my favor and I received a total of nothing from my ex......

But it meant I could link to the result in the comments section of every video she tried to frame me as the bad guy because in our state, court proceedings are public record.

Suddenly her viewership dropped and she blamed me for ruining her life.

A bunch of my friends said I went too far and should've just taken the court win and left her alone.

Was I the asshole? ######

Response: NTA. The ex shouldn't be using a private relationship for youtube views, and deserves everything they got. ######


Prompt:
Still using this account to ask advice I don't want my primary account to see.

I have a cousin who is a very 'pull yourself up by your bootstraps' and 'gumption' kind of guy (despite the fact his parents are well off and he currently works at my uncle's company).

Well my cousin was ranting and raving on facebook about all the people filing for unemployment right now and how they're all just 'welfare queens' trying to game the system. Well I know he received a stimulus check and immediately spent it on a 4X4 because he posted pictures after he did it.

So I responded to his Facebook post by asking when he would be returning his government hand out as he obviously didn't need it. Well my Aunt didn't like that so I was immediately called and told to remove my comment and when I told her no she yelled at me.

Idk times are weird and I'm growing to give less of a flying F**k what do you think AITA? Did I go too far in calling out my cousin? ######

Response: NTA. The dude can delete comments on his own Facebook post. The aunt might be a bigger AH even than him; that’s absolutely ridiculous, especially given he can just delete the comment if he thinks it’s so bad. ######


Prompt:
Even though I live in a wealthy neighbourhood, people seem to not want to bother putting up fences for their dogs or even if they do put their dogs in the front Yard without being leashed to anything.
Usually it’s not that big of a problem but, today it was.

As I was walking my dog, another dog ran out of it yard and came towards us. He wasn’t barking or anything, I think he just wanted to say hello but, I’m very cautious of other dogs and I just kept walking. The dog followed us past a few houses (so for at least a couple minutes), and stopped to pee, we kept walking about a minute later I heard yelling looked back. A man was running frantically at the dog, a car was coming down the way and swerved out of the way. The man (the owner) sternly yelled at the dog, was able to grab it and take it home. To be clear I was down the road by now and while I saw what happened I wasn’t close at all.

I went on with my walk and about an hour later on the way back, passed the house with the dog. As I had passed the house and was halfway passed the next house, the man that opened came out of his house and started calling after me. At first I didn’t realise he was calling after me and kept walking but when he continued to yell “hey” I tried around and said “me?”

He started going off about how it was my fault his dog was almost hit by a car. I should have caught his dog and brought it back to his house.

I countered his argument and said “actually if you had been keeping a close eye on your dog, he wouldn’t have wondered off. It’s your responsibility to watch after your dog and not mine.”

The man huffed at my argument, waved his hand at me and walked away. AITA?

To be clear a lot of the reason I didn’t bother with the dog is because I assumed the owner was close by and would call the dog back to him. Plus it wouldn’t have been easy to grab the dog and walk him back to his house as he didn’t have a leash and I had a dog if my own I was walking ######

Response: NTA. The dog is his responsibility. He should have been extremely apologetic for putting everyone involved in that situation. ######


Prompt:
Basically what it says in the title. My boyfriend made an OnlyFans a couple months ago to make a little extra money. I wasn't crazy about the idea at the time but I figured he's an adult and if he wants to get naked on the internet for money that's his prerogative.

Anyway lately he's been bugging me to subscribe, and I just don't see the point cos I already see him naked all the time plus he shows me everything he posts before he posts it to get my input already... like what's in it for me you know?

So I said all that to him and he basically said I should do it to show my support for his work and endeavors, and then he said how he comes to all my gigs (I'm a musician) to support me and I should do the same thing cos couples support each other. And I said those 2 things aren't the same and he said how exactly are they different? And to be fair to him, I couldn't think of a reason.

But Idk! I still don't really wanna pay 10 bucks a month to subscribe to his only fans. Like I just don't see what's in it for me. Now he's lowkey upset with me and I'm wondering if I'm being selfish or hypocritical for how I feel. Would love an outside perspective...

tl;dr BF wants me to subscribe to his OnlyFans to be supportive and I don't want to. ######

Response: NTA. The difference is that your boyfriend can't experience or give you feedback on your gigs without going to them, whereas you're already seeing and giving him feedback on everything he posts without having a subscription (which, by the way, is a way of showing support for his work). All having a subscription will do is give him $10 a month minus the 20% cut the site takes - it seems like it would be easy to cut out the middleman and just give your boyfriend 10 bucks if he's really that hard up for cash - and make his subscriber count go up by 1, which seems like a really stupid waste of $2 a month. ######


Prompt:
Title pretty much says it all. My friend was checking on my cats while I was on vacation (this was last year). Basically I was supposed to pay her $20/day for the week.

Then (while I was on vacation), apparently she somehow ran over the light post in my yard. It broke in half and she tore out some of the underground electrical, along with one of my most beloved plants. Thankfully I was able to save my plant. I know that sounds dumb but it took me forever to actually get this thing to thrive.

My friend offered to pay for it, so I had some electricians come out and look at it and they all recommended I use my home owners deductible to get it fixed, which is $500. I believe the cheapest contractor was $800. After she heard the estimate, she spazzed and said she couldn’t pay that. So I said I would keep the money I owed her for cat-sitting and pay the rest of the deductible. She got upset and said that wasn’t our agreement, but I don’t really want to pay her after needing to pay this deductible for something that was blatantly her fault.

AITA here? ######

Response: NTA. The damage she caused is worth more than the sum you were going to pay her. It may have been an accident, but it’s an accident you have to pay for. It’s only right that she take some responsibility. ######


Prompt:
So I work in a local bookstore, it’s pretty small so has been open over the past few weeks, with restrictions of course. With it being pride month, my manager wanted us to do a window display of gay authors and books with gay protagonists etc, with rainbow flags across it, and we’ve had a lot of praise. It’s a small town but pretty inclusive.

Yesterday morning a woman comes bounding over looking like she’s about to pop a blood vessel and practically shouts at me demanding to speak to someone. I asked her how I could help and she points to our display and says that we’re evil for putting that display up as there was children around. My coworker and I thought this was hysterical as my coworker is bisexual and this 2020, like who gives a fuck. Also want to add that none of these books are erotica or anything offensive, some of them are even children’s books.

I decided I wanted to have a little bit of fun with her so I gasped and asked how we could be so inconsiderate and asked her how we could think of the children. So I took a pile of books behind the window display that were clearly focused on same sex parents and gay relationships, and started putting them in front of the books in the front row of the store, telling her that if she wasn’t happy she could simply leave the store.

She didn’t understand what was going on for a few seconds but when she did she demanded (yet again, clearly hasn’t gotten laid in a while) that one of us go and get our manager. My coworker did and my manager diffused the situation but is now telling me that as much as he agrees with me standing up for what I believe in, the customer is always right and I shouldn’t be intentionally provoking them. He’s now considering taking down the display in case it happens again and telling me if it does happen again I’ll be let go. AITA? ######

Response: NTA. The customer ISN'T always right. You were sarcastic, sure, but not outright insulting. ######


Prompt:
So we had a cat appear around our house eating the food we put out for the jack rabbits and magpies. I noticed her and put a little extra out and over the course of four or five days, I realized that she was eating all the food as fast as possible. After a week, she let me get near and feed her all she could eat which was a truly shocking amount of food. I suspected she was young and pregnant. Got her into the house that night. Took photos and posted Found Cat ads.

Took her to the Vet next morning to check for a microchip. Cat has no ID, and no one has reported a lost cat matching her description. Vet checked her over and cat was very young, pregnant and starving. The outcome for her the kittens was grim. The Vet didn't expect her to survive the birthing process, and kittens had been starved since she became pregnant, if they survived labour they would most likely starve because the cat was too thin to produce milk.

I was offered a variety of solutions to deal with the cat including trying to find an open shelter to take her; abandoning her; hope her owners appear before labour; et cetra. I chose the final option, claim her as mine and have the termination spay done. The Sassy Princess was last spotted doing the algebraic calculation of how to spread out her tiny body to take over the largest amount of space on a queen size bed possible.

I have had several friends outraged that I took a potential owner's right to choose whether their cat has the right to have kittens away. Someone else accused me of not caring about the kittens and not wanting them and being a kitten killer. I have argued that if the owners did show up, I would return the cat if the paid the hefty vet bill. As for being a kitten killer - yep I chose one life over that of her babies because it was the life I knew I could possibly save. AITA ######

Response: NTA. The cat needed the operation to survive. She has a home and a human to love her. You did good. ######


Prompt:
My apartment complex just repaved and repainted the parking lot. They added one more parking spot to our area for our building and by doing so, the spots are much smaller.

A person who lives here and has advertisements for his $59 DUI school/drivers ed company(oh the irony), hit my fiancee's brand new Honda CRV while parking last night. He parked so close she had to use the passenger side door to get in this morning so she didn't see the damage until she got home at 5pm today. He didn't leave a note or acknowledge it at all. We took pictures of his car and our car and I had to decide what to do.

The damage is minimal, but damage nonetheless. I called my insurance and they said to get a police report. So I called the police and they came, inspected the damage, confirmed the damage matches both cars. The owner of the other vehicle came out and asked what was happening, just as I was walking back to my apartment to wait for the police to review everything. They came to my apartment and told me he denied it but still gave his insurance information.

The police told me that I need to file my own report online and enter the information he gave me. So I filed a report and a claim with my insurance. Unfortunately we both have Geico, not sure what will happen.

My fiancee said I took it too far and potentially put us in danger since he might know where we live and what car we drive. I figured it would teach this guy and potentially bring it to the complex's attention that the spaces are too close. I also called them to let them know. AITA? ######

Response:
 NTA. The car was damaged and needed repair. You were doing your due diligence to get it fixed.

As far as being in danger, I doubt it. The guy has a business and there is now a police report with his name in it. If anything happens to you guys, the police will look at him first. If he were a criminal, he would know he can’t go after you guys. He would also not do anything if he’s a decent human being. He’s obviously a liar, but it doesn’t make him a psycho. You shouldn’t worry about him unless there’s another reason to. ######


Prompt: AITA if I ask my neighbors to keep their kids from bouncing the basketball so early in the morning. They start about 6:30-7 am. I work nights as a nurse so this is the time I’m getting in bed. I’ve tried everything even earplugs,not the harming 3m ones lol, but I swear I can still hear it. Idk. Their screaming at top of lungs is another post. 😂. ######

Response: NTA. The art is in the delivery. ######