Prompt:
In this story I am a very introverted person and always been like that from a young age while my family is very extroverted. like to be in my room for awhile I am a 16M.
Backstory
When I was 8 I had door with a lock on it and my favorite thing to do was legos and that was all I would do. One day my one of my two sister now 13 was 5 went to my room and broke all the things I spent awhile on making so when I got home from school I was mad and went in my room and locked the door. My sister wanted to play with me and my  parents told me to play with her and I refuse so they broke down my door. So that how Iost my door and two years ago when I got a new door with no door handle on it. So the door has a hole on the one of the sides that is just big enough for someone to look into.

So during this quaratein I have been forced to hang out with my family more which dosen't bother me to much. There is just one thing my sister 10 is the worst she is the stereotypical entitled child who will cry when anything bad happens or any criticism while also saying she doesn't care.Who will make very high pitched voices and will call everyone child. She dosen't care about anyone's privacy and will just walk into my room and scream in an annoying voice while I'm on call to embarrass me and my friends who is on speaker said can you tell that fat bitch to shut the fuck up and she ran out crying. My friend does not like my sister she is very annoying when he comes over and is the reason he dosen't come over. My parents got mad and said I shouldn't have people on speaker and I said she shouldn't have been in my room and I should have a lock. They said I need to make my friend apologize and I said no and she needed to hear it she is obese and is told constantly she is skinny and any time she is told other wise she cries and is told by my parents she is skinny.
So reddit am I the ass for saying it not my fault my sister heard bad things and I need a lock. ######

Response:
 NTA- It's a bit concerning that you, as a sixteen year old boy, do not have a door that locks in a household full of girls. It's an issue of the healthy amount of privacy and space that teenagers need. I mean you can't always sit behind a locked door, but you should be able to go to your parents and say, "I'm going to talk to my friends for a bit so I will be locking the door since we don't want to be interrupted by my little sisters" or be able to lock the door for a few minutes while you get dressed after a shower.

Anyhow, here's a trick that might work for you, at least temporarily. Do you have a doorstop in your house? (One of those triangle peaces of wood that you wedge under a door to keep it from closing.) If your bedroom door opens inward, whenever you want to prevent your sisters from just barging into your room, close the door and put in the doorstop. Your sister, when they try to get inside, will just push the door further onto the doorstop. So they might be able to crack the door open a little, but they can't just wander in. When they complain that they can't get the door open, tell them to hold on a sec, they pushed the door onto something (clothes) that was on the floor. It's going to take you a minute to get it unstuck. The key is not to let them see the doorstop. This might result in your parents taking away your door again, but it will prevent your sisters from busting into your room while you're naked. ######


Prompt: My (26F) boyfriend (25M) gifted me a pair of expensive headphones he got for free last year. I’ve been using them pretty regularly since, and he’s been away travelling for much of the time. Now he’s home and staying with me because of current circumstances and has been using my headphones quite a bit while I’ve been at work (I’m fine with this). When I got home from work this afternoon he asked if he could have them permanently. I laughed and said no I use them and they were a gift. Now he keeps asking and borderline begging me for them saying he’s “stressed” about not having headphones when he goes back to travelling for work, even though we don’t know when that will be. They’re expensive headphones and I don’t really know why he can’t buy his own cheaper headphones if he doesn’t want to spend that much money right now. I bought his plane ticket home and have been fully paying the rent and most of the groceries while he’s been here. He said he’d buy me cheap ones that have a cord (the ones in question are cordless) in exchange, but I’ve gotten used to having the cordless ones... should I just let it go and give him the headphones? It seems a petty thing to fight over but I think it’s rude to ask for a gift back a year after the fact. AITA?? ######

Response: NTA- it was a gift. period. he doesn’t just get to decide he wants them a year later and take them back. if he’s okay freeloading rent food and basically everything else off of you then he can at least buy his own headphones. sounds like you’re dating a child instead of a grown man tbh. ######


Prompt:
So I know it sounds bad but hear me out. I found a used sofa listed online, and I asked the owner if I could come by and check it out. She agreed; she was keeping it in her garage. When I arrived I asked if it was okay if I felt it and generally "checked it out", and she said fine. I looked to see if if the cushions were detachable, looked for stains, that sort of thing. Then I sat on it, and the whole thing collapsed. It seems one of the legs was loose or already broken. (If it matters, I'm 130lbs.)

I said I was sorry, I felt bad about it and embarrassed. She said I would have to buy it now. I was taken aback and replied that all I had done was sit on the couch - if it collapsed obviously there was something wrong with it before I arrived. She said there was nothing wrong with it before I sat down and that she "didn't give me permission to sit on it" and now she couldn't sell to anyone else so I would have to take it.

I said no and left. But now I can't stop thinking about it. In my mind, when she said it was fine if I inspected the couch, this would obviously mean that I could sit in it. Isn't that one of the first things anybody does when checking out a couch?

So what do you think, reddit? AITA? ######

Response: NTA- it sounds like it was already broken, and the owner was trying to pull a fast one on someone. ######


Prompt:
My gf and I live in a 600+ sq ft apartment on a bottom floor with 2 cats. Quite recently, my gf had to make the decision to put down her dog due to liver failure. It was very fast and sudden, because we went in for a upset stomach and expected medication, not a lack of dog.

She immediatly started looking for another dog to adopt. I completly understand this, because getting another dog is part if the grieving process. However, this is where I wonder if I'm the asshole: I told her no.

My gf likes a "beagle/hound" mix that isn't fully housetrained and used to be abused, so the world is still scary for them. I'm very hesitant on getting a dog, because for our last dog, a lot of the walking/training resposibilities fell on me. I would get guilt-tripped into taking the dog out for walks by myself, while my gf would NEED me to be with her. I don't have the patience for dogs and while I like them, I'm more of a cat person anyways. I'm not ready for more financial costs and the emotional/physical responsibility of another adult dog that has problems. We're gone 9 hours a day and we can't always afford dog walking/sitting. However, its really hard to see my gf go through something like this. ######

Response:
 NTA- it should be a mutual decision to bring a new pet into the house.

If you two didn't live together, then yea, you'd have no say in the matter. But since you do live together you will have responsibilities to the pet. It's not reasonable to be forced into pet ownership.

I'm not sure I agree with your statement that getting a new dog is part of the grieving process. A lot of people do get new dog's when one dies, but many do not. Those that don't still process their grief.

I'm sorry for y'alls loss. ######


Prompt:
I'm the eldest sibling in my family and have always prompted my younger brothers to remember important dates for our parents. Over the past two years, my youngest brother (29) has been living with a woman who has some strong beliefs about death and being in places where people have died. As such, my brother has drifted away from the family.

He has said some very rude and offensive things to me and our other brother and uses our parents as an ATM. I can't blame my parents for helping, as it is always some dire emergency like their power is going to be shut off (the GF has two kids from two other guys who live with them) or not enough money for groceries, etc.

Recently, he has refused leftovers that my mother was bringing to him for his lunch at work as the food has been in her house and is "cursed." These lunch drop offs were the only in person contact my mother had with him. When he cut off the visits, it broke her heart and she cried. My mom is not a crier, so you can imagine the protective outrage throughout my family, though we didn't actually go after my brother.

Today is my Mom's birthday. Usually, I would remind my brothers to wish her a happy birthday, but since every time my youngest brother calls, he asks for money and causes general disappointed heartbreak, WIBTA if I didn't remind him? There is a good chance he'll see that it's her birthday on Facebook and that will remind him to call, but if I don't, WIBTA? ######

Response:
 NTA- it is not your job to remind a 29 yo man of your mothers birthday. He can succeed or fail on his own

I went through the same thing with my older brother, he forgot moms birthday and then got mad at me for not reminding him. I told him to grow up and stop blaming me for his fuck up ######


Prompt:
This happened a few months ago, but my brain won't let this one go.

So I was hanging out with some friends. Two guys, one woman. We're all in our early 20s and have had our fair share of romance in life. The topic of sex popped up and we start talking about some of our past experiences. One guy joked about how having sex only made his dick bigger and bigger. We all laughed and he said that he wished that's how it works. My female friend (let's call her Sarah) piped up and said "Yeah, for women, it's the complete opposite. The more sex you have, the bigger your labia gets and the looser you become." There were some chuckles, but then I asked her if she was serious. She said she was.

Now, this is a big myth. I was surprised a woman who has had some experience actually believes that. I basically told her this, and then she started getting annoyed, asking "how me and my dick knows about that". I said the same way I know anything about female anatomy- I've read up on it. The whole "women get looser" thing is something sexist dudes made up to slut-shame women. My other friends were silent on this. She then just said: "Whatever, I'm not in the mood for this kind of mansplaining."

So I'm at a loss here. AITA for explaining something that I feel like people should just know about? ######

Response: NTA- ignorant friend who wants to make you feel bad for knowing something about anatomy ######


Prompt: Due to my family I had an opportunity to learn multiple languages from a young age.   12 to be exact.   So after I joined the military and learned about FLPP I was making very good pay while basicly living on board a floating city.   Since then I have developed the nickname tongues. Goonies referance im guessing. After 8 years and 3 tours I had to call my military career done.  And transer to a civilian market. I got a simple job working private security.  Drive a nice Benz and am an avid firearms collector.  When i go out with friends they always think since I can afford the tab I should pay.    The way I see it if its my idea then It should be my dime  if I say hey lets all go out to eat then I would offer to pay for everything.    I've done this a few times but they just want to party on my dime.   One night I get invited out and we all started drinking.  I pull the bartender aside and tell them my tab would be separate from the groups  and to keep an eye on us.  After I had my 3rd shot of liquor and maybe my 5th beer I summon an lyft and go home.  An few hours later my cell starts ringing. Its the bartender My friends told the bartender i was supposed to pay,  they managed to run up a nearly 500 dollar tab and if they can't pay the police will have to be called.  I just hung up and went back to sleep. ######

Response:
 NTA- If your friends want to party, they should be responsible to pay for that.

Express that and stay from, don't let them continue to take advantage of your hard work ######


Prompt:
Obligatory backstory: my parents are divorced, me and my brother are respectively 21 and 24. My mom remarried a guy with only adult children (like in their 30s), and my dad is about to marry a woman with many children between the ages of 5-15.

I'm getting married in the fall, so I'm in the process of packing up my childhood bedroom. I noticed my dad has gotten out a lot of my old books and toys for when his future step-kids visit. A lot of my books are very sentimental to me, as I adored reading growing up, and I hope to pass on my books to my kids one day. WIBTA to hide my childhood stuff so that I can get it back for my own kids in the future? I don't want my step siblings to get attached to something and then not be able to get it back when I try to reclaim it.

My mom says it's my right to control my stuff but my fiancé says it might be selfish, since I'm not actively using it right now. I'm really torn because I don't want to be the evil stepsister but I also don't want my dad to see his first kids' treasured items as something he can just give to his new family at his own disposal. ######

Response: NTA- If you care about these things, you should be able to keep them. Especially since you have plans to pass them down eventually. I think it helps everyone in the long run if you separate your stuff out.  And as an added bonus, if there is anything you don't see yourself keeping, you could always leave that behind for them if they want it! ######


Prompt:
Tldr at the end

There's talks about small gatherings being able to happen before my birthday so my parents wanted to invite family over & I told my grandmother if it's possible to come over she can celebrate her birthday as well (There's a week difference between my grandmother & mw while a 9 day  difference me & My cousin)
also i dislike kids because they cause me to break down.

 my auntie was told about this & then she Was saying how great it was that myself, My grandmother & My cousin will be celebrating the same day. My mother said that's not happening, There will be drinking & I can't deal with kids yet my auntie kept demanding her to just ask me.  (legal age of drinking in my country is 16 with Parent supervision & in your own home, 18 for buying)

I have been helping sort out my backgarden to make a makeshift 'bar' & invite few neighbours, My auntie, her 2 kids & My grandparents over. There will be social distancing & also theyll not be there for long periods of time ( & again this is only in talks for now, it all depends on what the rules are)

I avoid voicing myself & never wanted to celebrate my other birthdays but I've been planning to celebrate my 18th for years with my parents so I'm not sure if I'm being an asshole or if what I'm doing is fair

TLDR:

Auntie is trying to convince me to allow her kids birthday  ti be celebrated with my 18th party because I asked my grandmother to celebrate her birthday with me. there will be drinking &  social distancing (Wont  happen if the rules arent allowing small gatherings.)  I feel bad since I don't usually see my birthday as a big deal but Its my only one I ever wanted to celebrate so I'm not sure if I'm actually an AH or being  reasonable ######

Response: NTA- if there’s alcohol, a kid shouldn’t be celebrating their birthday there. Your aunt should do something kid like for your cousins birthday. You and your grandmother are adults. I doubt that your cousin even wants to share the celebration anyways, it’s likely just your aunts doing. ######


Prompt:
At the time I was 18(F). I was doing a Media Make-Up and SFX course, and when I applied I was not aware there would be hairdressing aswell, I wasn’t interested.
I have Afro-carribean hair and was the only mixed-race person in the class. My teacher and the rest of the girls had straight hair. She wanted the girls to be blow-drying/straightening/rollering my hair, which I explained they can’t because my hairs DIFFERENT and it could ruin it (genuinely, as I use African natural products and I never ever use heat - It’s also super super curly?) and she said I had NO CHOICE but to participate, I was extremely upset. She tried to put a fckin brush through my DRY hair which hurt and I flipped out and left, I have to wash my hair wet & conditioned for obvious reasons. And I felt like despite her being a qualified hairdresser, she should either have some knowledge of my type of hair or not go near it at all. My other teachers & the girls then became super bitchy and telling me I’m “acting superior” which caused my anxiety to rocket, and I eventually left. AITA? ######

Response: Nta- if the teacher was worth a shit she would have used it as an opportunity to teach them how to work with your hair type not destroy it. Then to bully you instead of admitting she had no clue what she was doing. She sounds like a dangerous form of idiot. I'd file a complaint and demand my money back. Walking out was the most common sense thing that happened in this whole story. ######


Prompt:
Well this post isn't really about me but my sister wants to know if she's the asshole here

Me(15f) and my sister (22f) recently got a visit from one of our aunts who was about to have a child. She said that she needed a place to stay for a few days.

My sister told her that she couldn't because they don't have any room for her. In reality our aunt has a habit of trashing a house within a day and overstays her welcome.

The next day we find a post on Facebook saying how we're bad people who forced a pregnant lady to sleep in her car. My sister feels really bad about it is she the asshole ######

Response: NTA- if she was bad before, cue using her pregnancy as an excuse why she's awful when she's there. ######


Prompt:
I gave birth January 4th 2018 to the cutest (may be a little biased there) little girl.

My relationship with her father was low contact when we broke up (he wasnt ready to be a father...despite having a second child born in May 2018?)

He would visit every weekend, he didnt want custody and probably wouldn't get anything other than supervised anyway due to his history.

His partner started posting pictures that I sent to him with captions as though it was her baby which was strike 1, I asked him to stop it which led to this huge fight which I wont go into detail about.

Then come to August 2018 he just disappears from her life.

Last week he contacted me out of the blue asking for some pictures of our daughter.

I haven't sent him anything and haven't responded.

But the group I'm in say I'm an AH and should just send at least one picture, be the bigger person.

AITA? ######

Response: NTA- if he’s really interested in seeing his child he can arrange for visitation ######


Prompt:
It was around 1 PM in the afternoon. Wife accidentally called her male college friend when trying to hook her phone up to the charger. We started discussing the prospect of having an afternoon quickie, then I went to wash up quickly before coming back.

Twenty minutes later we finished and found that her friend had hung up the phone right when we were done. He was listening the entire time even during our discussion.

I called him and yelled at him for claiming to be such a devout and religious man then violating our privacy when the call clearly was an accident.

AITA? ######

Response: NTA- idk how you can call someone without realising but he was a total asshole and a creep when he didn’t stop listening. Someone said that you violated his privacy by calling back, but I feel like that’s made redundant because it was to cuss him out about *listening in on you two* ######


Prompt:
My roommate and I don't see eye to eye on many things. The only relevant issue here is that I'm a  germaphobe and my roommate is the exact opposite.

 I was cooking myself a meal on the stove for myself. My roommate came out and initiated conversation. I've lately been avoiding interacting with her because of her hygiene issue.  (I've told her politely that her odor makes me nauseated; but she can't help it because of her mental health.) During the conversation she was picking at her nose, teeth, and scratching herself inside her pants. I ignored the hygiene issues during the conversation because I couldn't leave my food half cooked and didn't want her getting angry with me for addressing it.

&#x200B;

After my food was finished, I excused myself to go switch laundry. (This takes me less than two minutes.) The food was off the burner and resting.

&#x200B;

I came back to find my roommate hunched over the food, prodding at it. When she realized I was back, she jumped and shoved it away from her. I asked her what she was doing and she became very defensive insisting she didn't want it to burn, and then that she "just wanted to touch it".

&#x200B;

I told her she can go ahead and eat it because I didn't want it anymore. She called me paranoid and an asshole. She's insisted multiple times that I'm acting like I'm better than her and that she would never do anything bad to my food. But I'm just grossed by the idea of her messing with my food at all, even if she didn't directly touch it. The food is sitting out there right now and no one is eating it.

&#x200B;

TLDR; I'm refusing to eat food my roommate allegedly wanted to help with. AITA? ######

Response: NTA- I’m not even a Germaphobe and find this gross, I wouldn’t eat it either ######


Prompt:
I've been living with my current roommate for about 5 years now, and she has a habit of leaving her shoes (sometimes several pairs) in the middle of the floor in the entryway, right in front of the door.

I've been tripping over these damn shoes for several years now, and about a year ago i was sick and tired of moving them by hand, so i started just kicking them out of the way instead. Several times i've told her to please put them to the side so they aren't in the way, but it's fallen on deaf ears every time.

One day we were out getting groceries together she saw me kicking her her shoes out of the way as we walked in with heavy bags in our hands, and she told me to stop kicking them. I responded with "No, why won't you just put them out of the way instead?".

A few days later, shoes still there, i got fed up. I put her shoes on top the closet, which is too high up for her to reach, just to prove a point. When she finally noticed she got furious and asked why i would do that, and if i did it just to prove a point. She called me an AH, we argued for a couple minutes, and it ended when she went out the door. It's never been brought up since.

Well, it actually worked. The shoes aren't in the way every single time anymore, but i've been wondering if i went about it the wrong way? Frankly, i felt like i was out of options.

So, AITA? ######

Response: NTA- I’d say 5 years is more than enough. ######


Prompt:
Guys, please tell me if I was too harsh with my roommate. I’m going to admit that I find her pretty annoying and slightly racist.

We live in an apartment building that caters to student housing. They rent by the bedroom, so I did not know my roommate before I moved in at the beginning of the semester ( she was there first and has had three other roommates)

Now, either she’s ignorant or racist but there are things that she does that bothers me. She constantly asks me questions about “black” things. Think, “Do black people really....” When she saw me make my dinner one time she said “wow black people really can cook!” And offered to pay me to cook for her. She calls me “boo”. She just seems like an alien that has never met a black person before.

The thing that annoys me most is that she is constantly asking me to teach her how to twerk and shake her ass, or to do it myself. I am actually a ballet dancer, and while I have nothing against ass shaking, it annoys me that it is all that I am boiled down to.

Before this whole lock down mess it was easy to avoid her. Now I’m stuck with her and she’s getting on my nerves.

Last night she busted into my room playing Ass by Big Sean on her phone. I was reading. She had a bit to drink and started asking me to dance with her and show her how to twerk. I told her no. And she begged me, saying “come on I want to learn!” I said “It’ll he hard to learn with no ass...” And she actually got super upset about that y’all! She started yelling about how she was trying to have fun with me, calling me stuck up, and *crying*.

She went to her room and left me alone for the rest of the night, this morning I said hello to her and she’s ignoring me. It seems like I really hurt her feelings. At the same time, maybe it taught her not to bother me. Idk, am I an asshole for saying she has no ass? ######

Response: NTA- I was all ready to asshole you up after reading the headline, but wow. Your room mate is a racist ass with no ass. Good for you for standing up for yourself. I’m sorry you have to live with such blatant ignorance, I hope you can move soon. ######


Prompt:
My mom knows I (17f) can’t stand the taste or smell of teriyaki sauce. I have told her this multiple times, because the smell/taste makes me sick to my stomach. I ask her for a heads up whenever she makes something with teriyaki sauce in it so I can grab something for myself to eat.

I went grocery shopping for my mom today, and when I come back, my mom tells me it’s time for dinner. I go into the kitchen, and the smell hits me. She made beef tips and then covered it in a whole ass layer of teriyaki. I got a bit upset with her and asked her why she didn’t tell me she was making dinner with teriyaki sauce, and she laughs and says that it was just a last minute thing. I told her that maybe she shouldn’t have done that last minute thing, because now I couldn’t go grab something to eat from a restaurant (it was around 7:30, most stores close around 8:00 now, and we live like thirty minutes out from the closest fast food place)

Mom called my brothers “Andy” (16m) and David (13m) into the room and told them that I was “being picky” and refusing to eat. They started giving me shit about it, and I told them if they really wanted me to eat it, they could clean up my puke later.

Apparently I ruined dinner by being picky about food covered in something that makes me sick, and my mom is acting like a 5 year old who got upset (huffing, sighing, refusing to talk, etc.) and Andy told me I should’ve sucked it up and ate it. To sum it up: i basically ruined the entire night for my family by not eating.

AITA for not eating food covered in teriyaki sauce?

EDIT: because I just realized people might be confused about why I can’t just make something in the kitchen: My mom doesn’t like people cooking after dinner’s been made, or even people being in the kitchen afterwords. ######

Response: NTA- I used to hate peas and I literally threw up when my mom kept forcing me to eat them. I feel your pain. Maybe your mom really forgot but instead of telling you to suck it up she should have been more apologetic. ######


Prompt:
Loaned niece $1000 for her wedding expenses a few years ago; my sister asked for the loan on her behalf because she was too proud/shy... but when I said yes niece thanked me profusely. Niece has never paid any of it back, but sister paid just over half of it for her until I said STOP because it's not her debt (my sister barely makes ends meet).
FFWD to now; no family get togethers lately due to COVID, so no bday gift (usually a card with around $100) for niece back in March. After recently dropping off a gift at sister's for another family member, niece tells her mother "Oh, well, Uncle didn't get me anything for my bday".
I admit that I still think about the money owed -not hurting for it, but just the principle of the thing and that I feel taken for granted ...miffed that not even an attempt has been made by her to pay ANY of it back. So I was thinking 'fuck it' and would skip her $ present this year (maybe she would subtly get why, perhaps?). I'm pretty annoyed that she would bring it up to her mother like that; she is 25 years old now! However, in the interest of not causing a rift with my sister (or possibly the rest of the family), I am debating giving her belated birthday $ at the next family function... thoughts? ######

Response: Nta- I suggest a birthday card with a note inside saying £50/£100 has been taken off her debt to you. That way you have both given her a gift and reminded her she owes you money ######


Prompt:
I came to live with my parents in Alaska when Universities told their students to go home and I just graduated. Even though I’m on social security, I still managed to save some money for an emergency. I had to leave all of my home goods in the lower 48 and I’m expected to pay for my vehicle and possessions to be driven here. But that’s not the issue.
My sister and her fiancé decided to move back home too because of some hard financial hits and coronavirus cutting her work hours. I asked if I could move in with her when the time comes because generally just want to get a different job and don’t want to live with my parents anymore. I told her I would help pay rent and that we would have strictly roommate relationship rules. She didn’t say anything at first, but a couple days later asked to borrow money from me for the entire deposit, I said yes and that’s when she informed me I wouldn’t be allowed to move with her.

So I’m wanting to know if I would be the asshole if I told her I changed my mind about loaning her the money? I already said I would, I know she’s in a financial situation and I’ll probably never see the money again, but what she did really just... yeah. ######

Response: NTA- I see people saying get it in writing, but it's still a legal hassle to get the money back if she refuses to repay you upfront. Don't give her anything, use the money for your own deposit. ######


Prompt:
Since the pandemic, I’ve been working from home. I am a Spanish tutor and tutor students by appointment through video chats. Today, I told my boyfriend that I had an appointment, which means to please be quiet and not interrupt me.

I’m in the middle of tutoring this student (she’s older, very well-mannered) and all of a sudden we hear my boyfriend scream “SHUT THE FUCK UP” at one of the dogs followed by “MOTHERFUCKER”. The client sat there mouth agape and then she quickly ended the call.

I texted my boyfriend saying something along the lines of “Can you not yell curse words while I’m on a call? What the fuck?” all the while trying to reconnect with the client. She did not pick up. I’m certain she’s reporting me to my boss, and I will likely get fired.

My boyfriend texted me an apology. I was so pissed and anxious I didn’t respond. Later he came in and said he was sorry again. I told him an apology was not sufficient at all. I’ve been at this job for almost five years, it’s a work-study job through the university which I get food stamps and they work with my nursing school schedule, and it’s the only way I can pay for my bills and medication. I’m also applying to a graduate program and was depending on the supervisor recommendation from my boss. Now that’s all out the window.

It is 100% his fault that I’m getting fired, and he makes more in a day than I do in a week. I can’t get a “normal” job because of my erratic nursing school schedule, and I’ll lose my food stamps and any other income.

WIBTA for demanding he compensate me for my lost job if I’m fired?

Edit: Just received word from my boss that I am suspended from working until further decisions are made. ######

Response:
 NTA- I read some of the comments, OP. Your boyfriend is a dog trainer that screams at dogs? That's highly concerning.

I'd make him pay since he made you lose the job.  Or suspended according to your edit? What are chances you'll lose your job? Jw? ######


Prompt:
So my close friend (Q) & her bf (W) are getting engaged this weekend. They’ve been dating for 4 years but when they announced their intention to marry, Q’s family was completely against it & said some vile things to W, who is a lovely, wonderful guy. It hurt them both deeply, but they’ve decided to proceed anyways.

In the process of planning (& hiding) the engagement, but I’ve told off 2 people (both girls):

1. A, Q’s other friend who is working with me for deco. She said we should get guests to print their pictures with Q, write cute notes & scatter it around the tables. I thought it was a nice idea until I clarified with her if she meant the guests & THE COUPLE. She said either way was fine, but it was better if it’s just the guests & Q. I told her it wasn’t Q’s birthday, and unless Q’s marrying herself, shouldn’t we be celebrating the couple? She FINALLY got it after multiple times of me repeating it & agreed that we should plan it to surprise the couple.

2. B, another friend who blurted out the idea mentioned above in the group chat with W. When I told her it was meant to be a surprise for both Q & W, B said ‘oh it’s okay, engagements are for the girl anyway’. I was LIVID. B knew how Q’s family treated W & how W has been affected. & she’s just disregarding him? I told B the same thing I told A, & it took a while before she got it.

So yes, my bf said I was harsh but I wanted to know what you guys think. Should I have let them completely ignore W on his engagement day? ######

Response: NTA- I personally feel like a lot of people try to say it’s just for the girl, but that’s not true. Weddings are about two people coming together and literally merging everything. It’s a big deal for both parties. Regardless of how Q’s family treated W, it’s still his big day too. ######


Prompt:
Some background. My wife’s siblings are incredibly entitled along with her stepdad and sometimes her mother.

Sadly my pug (Otis) passes away last week. My wife and I are pretty torn up. He was an amazing dog who loved just about anyone, who’d give him food. Word soon got around to my In-Laws who at first felt sorry, but then after learning how he died (he had chronic heart problems) were saying we were stupid to trust modern medicine and if an animal is born weak it should die. The final stray was when me and my wife were in a zoom call with my SIL, and she said the following, I can’t believe you guys are hung up over your dumb dog. He was a dumb bitch who deserved to die. I. Saw. Red. I told her to shut the FUCK up and that she needs to stop being such a bitch all the time. It’s been a couple of days and my wife wants me to apologize for causing “drama” in the family. The way I see it is they’re the ones being inconsiderate assholes. So reddit, AITA ######

Response:
 NTA- I hope your SIL never wants to see you again so you can be rid of that insufferable woman.

I am very sorry for your loss, Otis was probably a great little guy. I’d love to see your favorite photo of him or maybe hear a story about him if you want to share some good memories. I have a 12 year old dog who is showing signs of brain cancer and I am genuinely afraid of what I would do to a person who said something like that about her. ######


Prompt:
(This happened a while ago, no big weddings during a pandemic for me, dw!)

I (24F) was the maid of honour at the wedding of my brother and his wife (my sister in law).

While we were planning the wedding, my SIL mentioned how overbearing her mom can be, and how she always feels bad asking her to stop being an attention hog. I told my SIL that on the wedding day, I'd take care of her, no matter what.

Sure enough, MIL pulls up to the wedding wearing a WHITE dress (something my SIL guessed she'd do). I saw her get out of her car and start walking towards the venue, so I pulled her aside before anyone could see her and brought her in through a side entrance.

I told her that it was inappropriate to wear white at someone else's wedding, and that if she wanted to attend, she'd have to change. I had my SIL give me some of MIL's nice dresses, so I had a few for her to chose from.

MIL flipped out on me. She told me I had no right to ask her to change and that I was being a pain in the ass on an emotional day. She started crying and went to look for her husband, so I updated SIL & she told me if MIL would rather miss her own daughter's wedding rather than just change her dress, she could miss it.

MIL ended up changing, but made a HUGE deal out of it and went home early during the reception because she "didn't feel welcome". She still maintains that I was out of line. I don't think I did anything wrong, but I do feel really shitty for potentially being the reason my SIL wasn't able to enjoy her wedding fully with her mother (even though SIL still had crazy amounts of fun). AITA? ######

Response: NTA- I can't believe the mom would try to take away her own daughter's spotlight. You did the right thing (especially since SIL previously mentioned how it bothered her) ######


Prompt: Yeah I now it sounds weird. My daughter is 2 and currently her favorite thing to do is to strip all her clothes off, take off her diaper, and pee everywhere while laughing maniacally. Partly because she hates the wet diaper, and while we are working on potty training, she is not quite physically ready, despite being mentally ready. Anyways, I’ve started referring to her as “the goblin” whenever she does this, and my husband thinks it’s hilarious and now whenever she’s covered in pudding/peanut butter/ takes off her diaper and pees while laughing maniacally, he also refers to her as “the goblin.” Usually it’s “the goblin needs a bath.” That kind of thing. Anyways, some of friends think it’s mean to call our daughter a goblin. Are we the assholes here? ######

Response: NTA- I call my sister an evil demon because of her very weird but still adorable laugh. Also because she can be evil. Kids are weird. Your kid just happens to act like a goblin. Hence the name goblin. ######


Prompt:
Before everyone judges me as an asshole, let me give a little backstory.

My brother in law got me a pair of really awesome boots 3 Christmases ago. I loved them. However, he got me the wrong size. I literally could not fit my foot into them. I asked my husband to ask my brother in law if he could exchange the shoes for the right size...and it just never happened. This pair of shoes has been sitting in my garage for over 3 years now because my brother in law has said he just doesn't have the time or the receipt anymore to get the right size.

So, today, I sold them. Money has been really tight with both my husband and I laid off and not receiving unemployment/stimulus yet. I made a pretty profit too because they are high end shoes that have literally never been worn.

My husband is really angry at me for. Called me ungrateful and that I should be "ashamed of myself" for selling them. Even though now we will be able to pay the light bill and get a few groceries after selling these shoes.

So AITA? I do understand where my husband is coming from - they were a gift, even though I've never been able to wear the shoes. My own BIL told him to chill out when he called BIL up to tell him how "ungrateful" I am. I just didn't see a reason to keep a pair of shoes around that I am never going to wear. :/ ######

Response: NTA- how is it better to leave them sitting in a closet to literally never be worn because they are the wrong size and you never got the exchange you asked for?? ######


Prompt:
I know this sounds bad.  I feel bad about it but I don't think I should pay them more.

Here's why:

- I was never on the lease
- I didn't pay any bond
- I was sub renting
- I gave them 10 workdays notice,  then paid for another 2,5 weeks to make it a month.
- I communicated everything with them that they need to find another person
- I made all the ads and pictures of the pace
- I made a letter to the landlord stating due to xyz I cannot be in this country anymore and if the rent could be lowered.

I was in this place for 3 months.  All went fine but then hell broke loose. I had to get back home since my family needed me.
When my roommates (24 f & m) heard this, they pushed me to get on the lease.

Furthermore they were understanding, helping me by just talking and I made ads to find someone new.  I had several people coming by the place but they didn't get my room since they wanted someone long term (year+) and between 20-30.

I had to catch a plane and put most of my stuff into storage.

They couldn't find anyone after 2 weeks and they asked me to transfer rent.  I told them I need to pay for 2 places now so I'll only do 2 weeks for you guys to find someone new.  They were grateful.

2 weeks later they explode and expect me to keep on paying since they haven't found someone new. It would be my responsibility and they are calling me names now saying they might have to move now etc.

I feel horrible for them but to be fair why would I pay for a place I haven't lived in for 3 weeks and I don't have any responsibility for?

One side I'm like maybe I should help them out even more.  But I'm out of a job and stuff is bad in my hometown now too.
I need the money myself. ######

Response: NTA- honestly this is a risk your roommates opened themselves up to when they let you move in without putting you on the lease. It sounds like you gave them plenty of warning and even worked to help them find a new roommate. Honestly, it's not hard to find a sublease, and it's not up to you to find one since you don't live in that space anymore. ######


Prompt:
So, basically, for the past month, I've been planning a cross country move back to my college town. I had some plans to stay with friends, and get there on July first so I can move in.

When I told my mom I was moving out, she was somewhat upset with me with how sudden it was, and was upset I didn't give her enough time to make plans for her to take time off work so she could come with me.

So I decided to post pone my move in date to a later date - about a week off. But this also means not staying with some of my friends along the way, and means me sitting around for another week extra while I wait.

I'm considering telling her tomorrow that it might be better if I go earlier and by myself so I can stick to my original plan. I know this is probably going to upset her and she won't like it....but would I really be the asshole? ######

Response: NTA- honestly just go. It can be really hard for parents to let go. ######


Prompt:
This is a short story, I live in England, born and raised, a friend of mine who I've known for years since we were in primary school once asked me if he could use my debit card to buy the DLCs for Grand Theft Auto IV on his XBOX 360, I agreed for him to do it He then returned my card to me and said he would pay be back. e didn't. He left my card details on his xbox for a couple of months making unauthorised purchases, to the point when my bank statement came in and it showed tonnes of money being poured out from my account, I then confronted him showing him the bank statements, I then went on his XBOX and I found my card details still there. I was pissed off at him for doing this as in REALLY PISSED I then removed my card, I then called up Microsoft asking them to refund my money and they kindly did, I then cutoff contact with him and never saw him again.
Last I heard of him was when I tried to contact me i then blocked him. Haven't heard of him in ages.

Am I the asshole? ######

Response: NTA- he’s a little thief. ######


Prompt:
I’ll keep this short.

I’ve worked at a restaurant for a while and there’s this one guy that usually comes. We’ve casually chatted a bit and have a casual relationship. He’s hot. I’m not. He usually comes really late, I’ve talked to him twice in the parking lot after my shift ended. He also initiates and carries on these conversations, I’m not harassing him.

I decided to shoot my shot, after work today we were talking again and I asked him out. He said no. I was fine with this. I was about to accept that and leave, but after the initial rejection he went on about how he just couldn’t force himself to be attracted to me physically, “you’re a very nice girl but . . .” and all that jazz. I felt a little hurt by this because he could’ve just aid no, there was no reason to go off on my appearance, I already knew he wasn’t physically attracted to me after the first no. I felt he was being kind of condescending. He continued to “comfort” me afterwards, saying he was sure I would find a good guy, looks aren’t everything, to keep my head up, etc. It was also really embarrassing because his friend was there and could hear everything going on. He looked really awkward and uncomfortable.

I went home and was obviously pretty bummed. My brother noticed and asked why so I told him and he told me the guy was TA. I kind of ranted about it to to three of my friends in a group chat and they agreed there was no need to list the reasons why he wouldn’t date me. At the end I calmed down and said I was over it, we talked about other stuff.

I guess one of my friends must have told friends and apparently he found out, he reached out to me on social media and said I was a bitter bitch. AITA ######

Response: NTA- He was insensitive for listing the reasons why hes not attracted to you, and it's completely understandable for you to be upset and vent with trusted friends. He shouldn't have contacted you and called you a bitch. ######


Prompt:
Throwaway because he uses reddit.

My fiancée (21M) and I (22F) have been together for 2 years, living together for most our relationship.

At first he moved into the apartment I already owned. He solely cleaned litter boxes as I tend to be allergic to litter dust, but other than that we both always did all of the other chores around the house.

After around 6 months of us both living in my small studio apartment, we decided to try to find a bigger place owned by the same landlady as she's been amazing. I preferred a 1 bedroom apartment that was on the third floor, had a dishwasher (important), central heating and air, and on site laundry. He preferred a one bedroom on the first floor (I hate living on the first floor), no dishwasher (and no room to have one installed), no on site laundry, and a wallunit that didn't flow any air into the bedroom. I could compromise on everything but the dishwasher as I couldn't stand doing dishes by hand. He said if that was the only thing I didn't like, then he would just always to do the dishes. I agreed and we live there now.

Its been a little over a year living here, at first he had no problem with being the only one doing the dishes. I've always put up the clean dishes, as long as he washes them, and other than that and of course litters boxes, we split all the other chores evenly. But I feel that since the excitement of the new place has worn off and now he refuses to do any dishes, letting them pile up up and up until I have nagged him enough and helped him put them all up. Rather than do them as they came into the sink everyday, he now will wait weeks to do it.

But now he's saying it's unfair that he has to do the dishes. Like I said, it's not like I don't help at all with the dishes, and it's not like he does all the chores in the house and I do none.

So reddit, AITA for holding my fiancée up to his promise of doing the dishes? ######

Response: NTA- he made the promise. You’re also compromising on so much he should be willing to keep up his one commitment he made to you. ######


Prompt:
My daughter is 3. My next door neighbor has a 3 year old son. My neighbor is an essential worker so I watch her son during the day. He and my daughter are very good friends and tell me often that they are married. It’s obviously innocent and cute.

Since I’m still working, I’ve been letting them watch a lot of tv so I can get my work done. They like to cuddle up together under a blanket while they watch. Sometimes they even fall asleep (which is a total bonus for me.)

They were knocked out under the blanket together one afternoon and I didn’t want to wake them up by moving them. My daughters father FaceTimed me and asked to see her. I told him she wasn’t sleeping but I turned the camera around and showed her napping with her friend. Her father hung up and later called me and yelled at me for allowing her to cuddle with a boy. He said it was inappropriate and that I was encouraging an unhealthy relationship. I told him he was being creepy and they’re 3. He got very angry and is telling people that I am wrongly calling him names. Am I the asshole for calling him a creep? ######

Response: NTA- He had those thoughts in his head. 3 year olds snuggin on the couch is perfectly harmless. ######


Prompt:
I f16 and my brother m29 usually get along well but since i was about 10 years old all responability of his daughter f8 has fallen on me. I love my niece so much, shes always been the sweetest kid and i love to play with her, shes like my mini me, but for 2 weeks straight its just like  havinv my own kid.
My brother and his ex have split custody and we have my niece 2 weeks out of the month and while shes in i do everything! Getting her ready in the morning, cooking for her, doing her hair, helping her wash her hair in the bath, doing all homework and bedtime reading and playing ALL DAY. I dont mind helping out with her but its expected of me and it can get really Frustrating, especially when i have to stay home from plans and babysit without pay so he can go out. So WITBA if i told him its not my job to raise his child? ######

Response: NTA- he can go out the two weeks he doesn’t have her, or once in awhile. It’s extremely important to set a boundary, that you are not her nanny, and he needs to do his job as a father. ######


Prompt:
Basically, my bf has a friend or two over about once a week. When they come over, these guys will drink a full case of beer and eat so much (like what one of them eats for one meal would be three meals for me). I don’t mind them eating and drinking all this but me and my bf split groceries 50/50. My bf’s friends never pay for anything - they don’t even bring over a 6pack when they hang out. I’m sick of buying a 24 case of beer for it to be gone in two days because of my bf’s friends and for buying a weeks worth of groceries only for half of it to disappear in one night.

So WIBTA if I tell my bf that he has to pay for the alcohol and food that him and his friends consume? ######

Response: NTA- have a conversation with your bf. Tell him he needs to start going to the store for his “party” food and drinks before his buddies come over. That the shared groceries are off limits now. He may stop having them over so often if he has to financially support that burden by himself ######


Prompt:
35(f) here who met an amazing lady back in February. I'm mom to cool cat 9 year old daughter. Lady moved in relatively quickly, partially in due to that old lesbian stereotype, and also because 'Rona.

For the most part the transition went smoothly. Daughter's dad and I share 50/50 custody and have great friendship. Every Friday my daughter and I like to have a "girls night" of just her and I doing stupid shit.

We've been including girlfriend in these Friday night romps and she's been mindful of letting us have our space. Until last night. Daughter wanted to watch movies and sleep on pull out couch with me.

Girlfriend was pissed. She said she wanted to sleep next to her person, which is me. Well I'm that little person's person too. I told her I loved her and that one night of me sleeping on pull out watching movies with my kid shouldn't be an issue. I sleep in bed with GF every night of the week.

Today I'm getting the silent treatment.

AITA? ######

Response: NTA- hate to say it but this should be a huge red flag and sign of problems to come. She needs to respect your relationship with your daughter. ######


Prompt: I (16) was on a call with my girlfriend (16) when my little sister (6) entered the room. She was being loud so I told her to leave and my girlfriend says "oh my god, I hate her", then I said "excuse me?" and she repeated "shes just annoying I don't like her.". I told her to knock it off and she got defensive. She said "I wasn't being disrespectful I didn't call her a bitch or a slut or call her any names". I hung up on her. We have been dating for about 1.25 years and my little sister has always loved her and I thought she loved my little sister too, but I guess not. And she keeps telling me im acting like a child and being disrespectful. Then she goes and talks to my friend, lets call him Brad. And brad messages me and says how I'm gonna lose her because I don't "have my shit in order" and I'm exaggerating. Now everyone is pissed at me because my girlfriend is saying shit about my little sister. AITA for being mad at my girlfriend? ######

Response: NTA- good on you for sticking up for your defenseless sister ######


Prompt: My sisters plays sports. Whenever she gets home from a game or practice she just comes in and lays on the couch for awhile. She never showers immediately. That’s a personal choice. The problem is that for days afterwards when you sit where she was sitting or attempt to use the blanket she did, it smells like straight BO. IMO if she’s not going to be hygienic and shower afterwards, she shouldn’t be allowed to be on the couch. Obviously, I’m not talking about sitting down to take her shoes off or anything, I mean for a decent amount of time. If she wants to lay or sit on her bed and blankets and they smell like BO, fine, go ahead. I just don’t think it’s fair that we all have to sit somewhere that is covered in her dry sweat and odors. It’s a shared space. I think I may be the asshole for asking her because it might come off as bossy or over controlling. I’m worried it’s not actually a big enough deal to bring up. I just think it’s unhygienic and inconsiderate. ######

Response: Nta- fabrics soak up the sweat and now she’s making stuff that’s not hers smelly and isn’t cleaning it, just let her know ######


Prompt:
Myself and my husband are due in october, after two miscarriages last year due to (now resolved) issues with my heart and kidneys and the surrounding treatment.

Everything is good this time around, and part of the journey of recovery for us is buying things for the baby, keeping things we bought for the last 2, and trying to enjoy my pregnancy instead of being very scared something is going to happen.

Me and husband have not great relationships with our families and no contact with some, for a lot of reasons, but are doing by far the best emotionally and financially, which can cause tension.

They have all rang insisting on giving us all their second hand stuff, I mean, piles and piles of it. My sister had a child with someone from a family with hygiene and smoking issues and we especially do not want clothes from them.

I spoke generally to everyone that we would like to buy our own stuff and gave our reasons (they know our m/c history) and also that as its our first child we would like to buy stuff new that we have chosen.

 Also that if they want to buy anything new the money would probably be more useful so we can get the stuff we need.

I've been called ungrateful, money grabbing, childish, been told that just because we are well off we think we are too good for their stuff.

I've spoke to friends who think that a baby is a "family event" and I'm excluding my family from the joy of preparing. But we have almost no relationship anyway, and had no plans in them being involved with the child.

Aita ? Am I ungrateful and excluding ? :(

*edit* just to add that a lot of them have issues with hoarding, over buying and spending too much. We are the opposite and as zero waste as possible and are determined to buy as little as we need ######

Response:
 NTA- even though it's pretty normal to keep the baby stuff for someone else and giving it to them, they're in no position to tell you how to handle this. If you want to buy everything new, that's on you. You don't have take presents you wouldn't be grateful for, or maybe even throw away. But that's always an option. Take everything, fake smile, trash can.

Edit: donation is probably a better solution than a trash can. But I like to exaggerate. And you do understand what I want to say. ######


Prompt:
I am a college student due to graduate in 2021. My parents are funding all expenses, and I'd graduate with no student loans.

Last year, brother came out as gay, and was disowned and cut off from all financial support. I've privately told him that I'm 100% supportive, and have been sneaking him money by scrimping on luxuries and giving him the excess where possible. Unfortunately, I don't think he did the right thing by coming out when he did as he too only has one more year to go and could have also graduated with no debt.

He has since said it would be very much appreciated if I put my money where my mouth is and cut my parents off too, or /he/ would cut me off for his own health.

I do plan to do that, but only after next year and then I'll go low contact. My brother says this is not enough and I am not supportive of him.

Am I the asshole here? ######

Response: NTA- even though I can see how your brother could feel unsupported, sometimes you gotta do what YOU have to do and being debt free from college is a huge deal. ######


Prompt:
So I (20F) am currently living with my boyfriend (21M). We’ve been together 7 months. He’s still working and I’ve been laid off so I’m at home all day.

I have been wanting short hair for a while, but I’ve been too nervous to. But with everything closed, I figured now is a good time. I’ve been debating back in forth but today I said screw it, I grabbed a pair of scissors and went into the bathroom before I could change my mind and gave myself a fairly “butch” cut. I’ve cut my own hair before - it’s not great but it’s not the worst homemade haircut.

I wasn’t expecting my boyfriend to be thrilled as it’s a big change. I didn’t call him ahead because I wanted to see his reaction. However, when he got home he absolutely flipped out. He asked what happened and I explained it to him. Started screaming at me for doing it without his permission, called me a selfish bitch, and said he didn’t think he wanted to be in a relationship with me anymore and left. I’d never seen him so angry.

I’m wondering if I was in the wrong here. I think he’s overreacting. It’s not a tattoo or anything, it isn’t permanent. He could have just said he didn’t like it and I could (consider) growing it back. Maybe I should have told him, but I know he isn’t a fan of the idea and I didn’t want to be dissuaded as I’ve been wanting to *try* short hair for a while. I think I should be able to at least experiment with my appearance.

So AITA? ######

Response: nta- dump his ass fr ######


Prompt:
Hi, everyone.

So I live with a roommate, and we’re both grad students, so constantly busy. This summer is going to be particularly busy for me, because I have two classes, an intensive German workshop, and am working on both PhD and Fulbright applications. Because of this, I don’t foresee me leaving my desk this summer. My roommate is also taking two classes. The other day, my roommate told me that her boyfriend would be coming up from Florida to visit for 5 days. She also told me that I would need to be gone from the apartment for at least one night so they could have sex, and asked if I could go stay with my boyfriend. I told her no, because I was busy and had class and would feel more comfortable doing my classes and schoolwork at home. She told me I was an asshole, and has gotten her friends and parents to also tell me I’m an asshole.

AITA for telling her no? ######

Response: NTA- Do y’all share a room or just an apartment? Because if she has her own room, that’s very weird to ask you to leave. If they want more privacy, they can go to a hotel. ######


Prompt:
My mother is in her 40’s, she got out of rehab for drug use recently.

While in rehab (she says) she applied to half-way houses for afterwards, the applications were denied.

She got out of rehab and decided she was going to Georgia the next morning. That night she spent a night in a hotel with a friend. I didn’t hear from her for about 3 days.  Tonight while I was working she asks me to pick her up afterwards. I ask where she wants to go and she just lays into me about how she has nowhere to go,  no one cares, and to just forget about it. Emphasizing how she has nowhere to go, most likely to guilt me into offering her to stay with me.

This was typical behavior of her when she was using and I, rightfully so, do not want her in my apartment if she is using again. And I don’t necessarily want her here even if she isn’t.

AITA for feeling this way? ######

Response: NTA- Directly after rehab she vanished for three days. You’re not obligated to care for her, but if you chose to you need to set ground rules. If you want to help her, help her apply to women’s shelters, finding a job, etc. Addiction is a disease and it’s very difficult to get back on your feet but working towards it is part of the process. ######


Prompt:
So I live in a household where only WOMEN are supposed to wash the dishes. Or house chores in general. My brother stays his ass on the couch all day or playing videos games, who also eats the most food and makes the most dishes with my dad has the nerve to tell me to wash the dishes.

When I tell him why don’t you wash the dishes he goes “what I look like to you” seriously!! He tells me you’re helping mom by doing so, so then why isn’t he helping mom too!?? My dad has the same mentality and always makes me do all house chores, I never once seen my brother pick up one thing.

Now I’m not here saying that I’m the most hard working but if everyone did their part in the house, sharing chores, and taking turns to wash the dishes maybe I would wash them too. I try to help out as much as I can but seeing my brother and dad do nothing just discourages me completely, it’s starting to piss me off, they are not only sexist but they don’t even see how backwards their mentality is. Also my mother is the same way, she only tells me to do chores because a woman is supposed to. And that one day I’m gonna have to marry and do my husbands house chores. Like whattt!!!

I also let my brother know that I won’t ever touch any dishes until everyone does their part in the house to help out.

AITA. ######

Response: NTA- cultures be like that. Women have to do all the work and men aren’t grateful for it. They act like we should be glad we have chores to do. I would just do my own dishes if I were you lol. After you’re done eating, only wash what you used. ######


Prompt:
This happened a while back but I have recently been thinking about it. We came in to school late as I was just walking around avoiding first period and he was off buying weed so we met up at the shopping centre next to our school. We walk in and I can immediately smell the most potent weed smell I tell him and he says “it’s fine no one will notice”. A few minutes later and were talking to a teacher who instantly recognised the smell, she was a nice teacher so he didn’t get in trouble she just warned him that she could smell it so other teachers would be able to. He starts panicking and asks to wrap it up in my PE kit and I’ll give him it last period. I say no because I didn’t want my PE kit to stink of weed as I had PE last period which means the smell would have had all day to stick to it and I planned on wearing my PE kit home and didn’t want to smell of weed when speaking to my parents.

AITA ######

Response: NTA- but you already know this. It wasn't your responsibility to hide it for him. ######


Prompt:
My (30M) wife (24F) has always been a big cook. She's been doing it since she was very young and she's great at it. Her home cooked meals are (usually) out of this world. She usually cooks in her house, but she has said before that she doesn't mind since she's so much better at it (she says my food is bland) and I usually wash up and watch the kids.

I'm not a super picky eater. I'll try anything once. But there's one thing I hate, mushrooms. They just make me gag.

So usually we don't eat mushrooms in our house or my wife will only cook them when she knows I'm not going to be home. But for the last few weeks, we're having mushrooms for dinner almost every other meal. Even in stuff you wouldn't usually put mushrooms in (like in a chicken salad) my wife has warned me there's mushrooms in.

Two days ago (after weeks of MUSHROOMS) I told her that I was having trouble eating with all the mushrooms we'd been having. She just shrugged at me and she has been relatively quiet since.

Since then I've cooked my own dinner, which is fine but the kids have asked several times why I'm not eating the same thing as them.

AITA for telling her I won't eat these mushroom meals anymore? ######

Response: NTA- but seems like something is bothering her. She knows you don't like mushrooms but yet she is constantly putting them in everything. And also putting them in stuff that she normally don't. Seems like she is purposely doing this to get to you. Coming from a woman, something is up. ######


Prompt:
I am (17F) and I am 173 (5'8) cm and I weigh about 68 kgs (150 pounds). I have struggled with body image issues throughout my life.

My mom cares about my health a lot and has been telling me to lose weight for the past year. First it was mild but now it has become slightly overbearing as she tells me to watch what I eat all the time. I understand, really. Her concern is natural.

I used to go running before but since I can't really do that these days, I am exercising at home. To be honest, our home is not very big and there's not much space so the exercise isn't very fruitful so I decided to follow a diet too.

Normally my mom makes easy to make food which isn't always very healthy as she doesn't really like putting too much effort into our food. Which I was fine with.

Now, my mom flat out refused to cook some healthy alternatives for me as she says that there is no need for me to go on a diet if I just exercise enough. I told her that the exercise isn't being really helpful to me.

Mom said that she can't cook extra healthy food for me as it would be too much work for her. Then I suggested that she can cook the healthy meal for both of us. She flat out refused and said that I was the one who needed to lose weight, not her.

Finally I decided that I should make my own food. My mother said that I have never been near the stove my entire life and that I'll burn the house down. She says if I just exercise enough then I won't have to go on a diet.

Yesterday i refused to eat the food made by her and instead made myself some salad. My mother feels insulted and says that I am being disrespectful.

Am I really being disrespectful?

AITA for making my own food when Mom told me not to? ######

Response: NTA- but 150lbs seems an okay weight for your height ######


Prompt:
My gf and I live in a 600+ sq ft apartment on a bottom floor with 2 cats. Quite recently, my gf had to make the decision to put down her dog due to liver failure. It was very fast and sudden, because we went in for a upset stomach and expected medication, not a lack of dog.

She immediatly started looking for another dog to adopt. I completly understand this, because getting another dog is part if the grieving process. However, this is where I wonder if I'm the asshole: I told her no.

My gf likes a "beagle/hound" mix that isn't fully housetrained and used to be abused, so the world is still scary for them. I'm very hesitant on getting a dog, because for our last dog, a lot of the walking/training resposibilities fell on me. I would get guilt-tripped into taking the dog out for walks by myself, while my gf would NEED me to be with her. I don't have the patience for dogs and while I like them, I'm more of a cat person anyways. I'm not ready for more financial costs and the emotional/physical responsibility of another adult dog that has problems. We're gone 9 hours a day and we can't always afford dog walking/sitting. However, its really hard to see my gf go through something like this. ######

Response: NTA- being a good god owner is a lot of work, and it sounds like most of that work is falling on you. In my opinion that gives you veto power over getting another one. ######


Prompt:
Context: my ex and I have a 20 month old daughter. Ex and I live together even though we aren't any longer romantically involved and overall have a good relationship.

Long story short: our daughter is a 20 months old and with special medical needs and have never left my side once since she was born. I've literally never been apart from her for more than 2 hours, say if her dad was taking her for a walk.

Daughter is not yet in nursery because of her medical condition meaning I care for her all day long and work part time at night. Dad has left me with her for a total of 7 months in total split over several weeks at a time, sometimes he had to go for work and sometimes because he wanted to fly home to visit family. For 20 months I've not met with a friend or family member or gone to the hairdresser without my now toddler by my side. Due to our smallish apartment, I also sleep in her room. I don't remember the last time I was on my own.

I'm going nuts, I'm exhausted, I'm getting more and more depressed by the day and I need a break. Just two nights in a hotel in the city somewhere. Doing nothing.

Money is not an issue but my ex insists that I'm being selfish and shouldn't want to go or want to be away from my daughter.  He's said that instead he'll take her for a few hours doing the weekend but in honesty, I just need away from them both for a day or two. AITA? ######

Response: NTA- because he would be the one that would stay with her while you’re gone right? Of course it’s not selfish to take a break. I wonder if it has to do more with him not wanting to be alone with her that long. Is there other family that can help with her if he’s absolutely not willing to? ######


Prompt:
A bit of backstory:Me and my step brother share a room, I am 17 and he is 15 and he HATES to shower like full on despises having to shower he is like a cat.  He plays football, and works out a lot so he sweats and has a nasty case of athlete BO, I hate having to smell that and I think in the past 5-6 months he has showered once (we aren't having any sort of financial crisis where he couldn't shower he just doesn't).  He's made the room almost unbearable and I pretty much sleep on the couch now cause of it and I put in a couple of those febreeze air fresheners.

Main Problem:I was in my room on my phone when he came in after working out, it was extra bad this time I was getting up to leave the room cause I hate the smell.  He asked me why I was leaving and I said cause I don't wanna be in the room anymore thinking he would just drop it.  I guess he didn't like that and came out of the room asking if he did something wrong, I kept brushing him off cause I really didn't want to hurt his feelings but he wouldn't stop pushing the issue.

Me:Dude you smell like shit.  Take a fucking shower, I can't deal with the smell anymore.  If you need help with how to properly shower ill show you or your dad can but you can't go on like how you are my guy.

(His sister got involved cause she didn't like how I was talking to him or something)

Step Sister:Don't talk to my brother like that

Me:Come on, I'm just saying he needs to take a shower.  I am not trying to bash him but he needs one, he works out too much to not shower.

Step Sister:doesn't give you a right to be a fucking asshole to him

At this point my step dad got involved and sent them to their rooms and I was sent to the living room, my step dad was mad at me the most and said that I should have been nicer to my "brother".  I told him that he needs to make him shower and smell better, I even said id help him if he did but my step dad told me to drop the conversation and never bring it up again.  AITA????? ######

Response: NTA- at 15 you shouldn’t have to be told to shower. Also he could have dropped the subject when you said you didn’t want to talk about. Everyone else in the household is just enabling his poor behavior. ######


Prompt:
My parents moved to the States over 25 years ago from Karachi, Pakistan, but they’ve held onto their religion and culture pretty tightly ever since. I was raised in a very Muslim household with commands to pray 5 times a day and lectures on how to be a good Muslim. One of those rules is that dating is Islam is zinnah, a grave sin. In order to “date” in the religion, you have to get married first. Fast forward to last Saturday when I told my family about my 3-year long relationship with my white girlfriend.

At first they weren’t happy and demanded we broke up entirely. They didn’t see another way. Then my sister talked to them and convinced them of another avenue: getting us married under Islamic and US law and then leaving me to “commit mistakes” on my own, without my family’s support. To them, it’s either that or we have to break up. However, I don’t want to do either of those options. I would like to continue dating her until I can financially and emotionally support her to get married in the farther future. They won’t accept that at all on the basis that it’s not the Islamic way. Therefore, since I can’t marry her and don’t want to break up, I’ve decided to leave my house and figure it out on my own.

I would be hurting my parents immensely and it’s possible they’ll never forgive me. But is their pain and resentment worth my independence? WIBTA for sacrificing my family and their financial support for a 3-year long girlfriend and a shot at independence? ######

Response: NTA- as a middle easterner whose very familiar with the culture, I strongly think your parents are bluffing. They are now saying you have to do things their way but once you are married with kids, they will want to be apart of your life. Choose what makes you happy and they will eventually give in ######


Prompt:
My daughter was going to be a flower girl in a wedding that is one month away. I informed the bride yesterday I didn't feel comfortable being in large groups of people right now, with the way cases have been spiking again. She didn't say much to me, besides blocking me on social media. She did tell me not to worry about paying her back since "I'm too poor to afford it". Which is not the case since I've offered numerous times to pay. Everything was second hand, or very cheap. Total was barely $100, which I will still pay back anyways.

 She is 47 years old, with 5 kids, and at least 3 different dads. They range from 9 to 25. She has been married at least 2 other times. She also had a very extravagant wedding just 4 years ago. She looks like a serial bride. I mean, who has a huge ceremony like that for their 3rd wedding?!

My husband is firm on paying this woman back as he says it's just the right thing to do, and I agree until she kept calling me poor. (Before I pulled my daughter out, any time I offered it was another variation of "No, you're too poor". My husband honestly wants to pay her only to spite her...as weird as it nay sound. So, wibta if I didn't repay? I feel like yes, but I also kind of don't care

Edited to add I cannot avoid these people. They live next to my mom and dad whom I do weekly chores for, and her 9 year old is always harrasing me when Im outside, and trying to play with my kids. Her future husband has known my parents for years. ######

Response: NTA- and if you want to be Petty with Purpose, donate the $100 to charity in her name and send it to her as a wedding gift. ######


Prompt:
I’m pretty good with numbers and patterns. I also have Aspergers. I always keep a mini notebook on how people close to me are doing. I just note their moods and their overall feel everyday.

I began dating my wife, Holly about 10 years ago. Back when we were 16. I did keep track of her moods back then. I noticed that there was a slight cycle of when she would be feeling down. I would always get her a small gift then, like some chocolate.

I didn’t connect the dots till I showed my friend the notebook. He explained to me, while laughing that I was tracking her menstrual cycle. I didn’t think that information would be so private. I mean, I am her husband. Anyway, when she found about the notebook, she got super mad. She was extremely disappointed that I would stoop to such a low level.

I don’t know what or if I did anything wrong. When I ask her what I did that was so wrong, she says nothing, but I’m pretty sure she’s lying.

So, AITA? ######

Response: NTA- Abed ######


Prompt:
I imagine this is going to be a bit of an ESH, but here's the context:

I have a nonbinary coworker, I'll call Ash, who unfortunately had their deadname printed on our weekly schedule for the first few weeks of their employment. They made it very clear to everyone they don't like to be referred to by it, and go by they/them pronouns. I myself am trans (though not entirely out at work), so I'm pretty sensitive to people using the wrong name/pronouns for someone.

Another coworker (Jessica) thought it was a great joke to annoy Ash by referring to them as their deadname and the wrong pronouns. Ash, as well as some others, had asked her to stop multiple times, she didn't. I got fed up, and started referring to Jessica as he/him and by the wrong name. She was visibly annoyed whenever I did it, but nothing ever came of it and she has since been fired for unrelated reasons.

Thining back on it, I do feel kinda shitty about it as one of my positions is that a person doesn't need to *earn* the right to be referred to by the correct name/pronoun, and I feel like I compromised my ethics on this. ######

Response:
 NTA- “Jessica” was going out of her way to be an ass to “Ash”. You gave her a taste of her own medicine, and tbh if she was someone who never experienced gender dysphoria it would not have had as negative an effect on her as being dead named did on Ash.

I’ve slipped up a few times with friends who transitioned and have been horrified and apologetic when it has happened. It costs nothing to be a decent person and respect pronouns and chosen names. Jessica is/was a crappy person for no good reason and you may have been slightly childish but it wasn’t AH behaviour ######


Prompt:
There's really not a whole lot of back story here. She's 39 weeks pregnant and keeps begging me to have sex because she thinks it'll help her go into labor. I've been denying her advances for the last month or so because I just don't have a drive to do anything. It's been hard on me because I feel like I’m upsetting her and I also don't quite understand why my drive left. I don't want her to feel like she's ugly or fat, but I don't feel like I should force myself to do something like that.

&#x200B;

Anyway she's really upset with me because I told her today I can't handle her constantly asking me to do it or making jokes about how I won't. It's torture to me to constantly be reminded about this internal conflict I've been having regarding the subject. I know it's my fault that I didn't tell her sooner but this sort of reaction is exactly what I was afraid of. On the outside when she makes jokes or requests she sees me respond with a complementary laugh/smile or a polite no.

&#x200B;

She's upset with me for what seems like her assumption that I'm saying she's ugly/fat now even though I told her specifically that's not true nor is it why. I know from a "should you ever have sex if you don't want to" standpoint the answer is that I'm in the right. But am I an asshole for not wanting to have sex with her right now? Should I have just kept it to myself and not told her to stop? ######

Response:
 NTA-

So, I want to begin by saying this, nobody is ever an AH for not wanting sex. Nor are they an AH for wanting sex. One way or the other, it’s okay to have the feelings you are.

Your wife is being pushy and insecure, which is partially due to the hormones flooding her body. But she is still responsible for actions and reactions towards the lack of sex in your life. In short, while I can empathize with her- she is still an AH and needs to be told. She needs to respect this boundary.

Now, it seems like this is something that is incredibly draining, and is taking up a lot of your time worrying about it. My unasked for advice? Seek out a therapist to work through these issues on. It could be pre-baby jitters, it could be your sex drive naturally waning, it could be part of a medical issue. Without talking to someone or seeking help, you won’t know what it is. ######


Prompt:
My dad just proposed to his girlfriend. I truly, genuinely, did not know she didn't drink. The only time I've spent with her where a drink would typically be ordered are times that we've gone for coffee, so I've never been in a situation with her where she had the choice to order alcohol and she's never mentioned it. So because I didn't know she didn't drink, I sent them champagne.

I got a phone call and an earful from dad with her audibly sobbing in the background. Dad wants me to make it up to her. On the call I heard her say "ask that dyke how-" and then the sound went muffled so I think dad covered the phone, but that's not even close to the first time she's called me that.

My stepmother loves flower langauge, as in what certain flowers represent and the meaning of each flower. I have done some rage googling and now have the knowledge required to create a bouquet that quite literally says "fuck you".

I told my girlfriend what I was planning and she's said it's a great idea... right up until my stepmum tells my dad what the flowers mean.

WIBTA for sending the rude flowers? ######

Response:
 Nta- "I'm gonna skip on the apology dad.

What I did was purely accidental. Her calling me a dyke was not.

You sure you want to marry someone who calls your kid a dyke dad?" ######


Prompt:
I (14M) hate when people barge in on me very suddenly and without warning. I startle easily, and this makes me jump every time. I always get pissed after someone startles me, so I try to tell people to be slow and quiet when coming in, and to give warning. My parents usually knock quietly on my door when I'm in my room before coming in, which gives me warning and prevents me from jumping.

My sister (11F) doesn't do this.

She'll run up and burst in really quickly and loudly, which always startles me and always pisses me off.

Earlier, she asked me why I'm always mad at her when she comes into my room. I told her it's because she always barges in so suddenly, and told her I wouldn't be as mad as often if she came in slowly and quietly. She promptly told me her personality wasn't like that and said she wouldn't be able to be slow and quiet when coming in.

I told her that her personality wasn't an excuse, and that it wasn't much to ask for her to give warning, and, again, she said it was because that's just how she was. She then said I wouldn't jump if I was "doing the right thing", acting like the reason I startle easily is because I'm always on something I shouldn't be. I told her I startle no matter what, and she shook her head and started going on about how she's defending her position and holding strong to what she thinks is right. I kept trying to tell her it wasn't, and she started using her excuse, "different opinions".

She then went back to being upset that I didn't seem to like her. I repeated that all she had to do was be slow and quiet when coming in on me, and again she said that's not how her personality was.

I said, "sucks for you, then," got up, and left.

So, Reddit, am I in the right for wanting her to just try to make an effort to not startle me every time she comes in, or AITA because her personality is so energetic that she can't, she's only 11, and I should make an effort to not startle so easily anyway? ######

Response:
 NTA-  Your sister is young, but she's already latched on to a dangerous excuse in life. The "that's just the way I am" is the excuse people give when they know they're being assholes but expect others to adjust to their asshole behavior instead of changing their asshole behavior and become better people.

Even the noisiest, most energetic extrovert will stop and knock quietly on the door of their introverted friend's home if they know it's important to their friend. Sometimes in life, you have to do something that is out of character for you to show love and respect to someone that means a lot to you and that person probably does the same for you. ######


Prompt:
so i come from a very traditional muslim family in turkey and since i'm 17 now my family started to put a lot of pressure about getting married bla bla. i'm closeted and my parents are super homophobic and religious. so today randomly the idea of having kids was brought up.

i accidentally told that i won't have any which sent my mom to a breakdown. she started shouting at me cause she won't have grandchildren, calling me selfish. (i didn't talk ab adoption cause she is really against it for some reason?)

whatever i shouted hat she was the one being selfish and that it's my life & i get to choose what i do (that was the safest thing to say without outing myself) she started crying and called me ungrateful. i was pretty confident that i was right but then my sister (who knows i'm gay) and she told me that i acter irresponsible and hurt her feelings?

so am i the asshole for making my mum cry just by telling her i won't have kids ######

Response: NTA youre right. It is your life. In the past, you had to have kids as helpers for things like farming and to take care of you as you got older, now theyre treated like pets for your parents to coo over. The "need" for kids is over beyond a genuine want to parent. You don't need to have kids to take care of you in your old age, times have changed, and if your mom wants something to fawn over, tell her to get a dog. ######


Prompt:
I’ll try to keep this as short as possible. I (38m) was about to get into the shower, but my wife (39f) told me that she was going to pick up groceries and was going to be 15 minutes. And she asked if I could shower the kids (5f, 3m) while she was gone. I said okay.

I didn’t want to shower my kids and then go into the shower myself because that seemed like a huge waste of water, and my wife showers with the kids very often, so I figured I would take them into the shower with me. I washed them and then myself, we dried off and I wrapped a towel around my waist. My daughter went to go get dressed and I went to get my son dressed.

My wife came home at this point and she came upstairs. She saw me with wet hair and my son too. She asked, “Did you shower daughter?” I told her yes. She said “That’s so fudged up!” (She didn’t want to swear in front of my son). I asked why and she said because she is a girl. I told her that our son showers with her and he’s a boy. She said that it’s different and asked that I wouldn’t shower with our daughter again. I said I wouldn’t but I was still confused. So AITA? ######

Response: NTA Your wife needs to look up "double standards". Did she allow you to bathe your daughter and change her diaper in the past? You're her father and it's more fudged up that she thinks she is allowed to bathe with the kids but you're not. Selfish much? ######


Prompt:
This happened a couple months ago but everything’s starting to calm down and the shelter in place order will be taken off and I can start next week.
Some background: I (16f) have been babysitting and tutoring for the past 5 years to pay for anything I needed. I’ve taken classes, have great references, and I’m disabled and babysitting is a lot easier than other jobs for me. I’ve also always found my own jobs by posting ads on nextdoor.

My sister (17f) saw I was doing pretty well and asked our mom to find her some jobs. My mom looked on nextdoor and found a lady saying she needs a babysitter for her 3 toddlers, decided it would be perfect for my sister, and waited for my sister to get home to show her. I had no clue and I commented on her ad saying I’m available and stuff like I’m cpr certified and I have experience and references. An hour later my sister gets home from her boyfriend’s house and my mom pulled up the ad and saw my comment and started screaming at me for “stealing your sister’s job”. Well a couple hours later the mom got back to me and said she’d love to meet with me so I drove to her house and met her and her kids and she offered me a job for every Friday night. I took the job because I need a way to pay for gas, hanging out with friends, buying a new phone, paying my phone bill, etc. I told my mom and both her and my sister aren’t speaking to me.
Also my sister had a stable job working at my dad’s store for almost $15 per hour but quit because he made her sweep the floor.  So AITA? ######

Response:
 NTA your sister sounds like a lazy fuck

-quit a 15$/HOUR job for not wanting to sweep floor

-asks her mother to find jobs for her while she goes to her boyfriends house

Yeah fuck that ######


Prompt:
Preface: I am 27 year old male and i have arthritis in my lumbar spine as well as a bulge in the same area. My only relief is laying down supine on my bed. Every other activity hurts. Walking, sitting, standing, everything. I just finished a year of unsuccessful treatment and being young my doctor said I could be placed on permanent restrictions but not permanent disability.

Main issue:

I'm coming home from picking up my dog from my girlfriends house as she was babysitting. I get home it's like 11:15 pm. There is absolutely no parking and my dad has the driveway because he pays the bills.

I ask my sister and her guests of like 8 people  if anyone is parked directly in front of our house. One guy responds and I ask politely " if you don't mind parking somewhere else I really appreciate it. I have back issues and it would really help me out if I didn't have to walk far."

Then my sister chimes in " I don't give a fuck, he doesn't have to move, if you got a problem with it then take it up with dad".

I disregard her. I repeat myself to her guest a simple " I would greatly appreciate it if you could help me out " he obliged and we switched spots. ( The nearest parking spot was about a little less than quarter of a mile upward. Thanks COVID-19 now you have everyone home there's no parking)  no harm no foul. Now I hear my sister berating me to her guests about " how I'm such a bitch and an asshole and how I'm faking an injury"

Now I'm not sure if this is relevant but I feel I should mention that our mother passed away unexpectedly on June 29th, 2020 and idk if I should just chalk it up to my sister still being hurt from our mom's passing.

I just believe that since I live here, and given my back problem i was okay in asking him to switch spots with me.

Was I the asshole for doing so? ######

Response: NTA your sister is probably still greiving but it doesn't give her the right to treat you like shit. You asked someone nicely who doesn't live there to move there car because you're in constant pain so no you are not the asshole. ######


Prompt:
My sister (17) has been sneaking out to meet a boy for the past few days. She snuck out to go to a park near our house  so i was okay with it. I only had to open the door for her when she went out and when she came back but lately she has been staying far too late even after telling me she won’t.
Yesterday, she came in my room and told me she will go to a town near us (about a 20 minute ride) with one of her friends motorcycles, i was not okay with this and told her no but she didn’t listen. I let her out and was really worried about her because of obvious reasons, i texted her multiple times to tell me when she’s coming, she said she’ll be home around 2am. The time comes around and she’s nowhere to be found, i text her again and she says she’ll come back at 4am. I got pissed at her and around 4 i just opened the door and went to take a bath, she came home at 5.
When she came back i told her that i’m mad at her and that i won’t help her sneak out again. She apologized through text.. AITA?

also, i’m ok with her going to the park because basically nothing can happen to her in our really small town and i’m not worried about the boy she’s going with because i know him quite well ######

Response: NTA your sister is being selfish. If you make plana/agreements you should stick to them. ######


Prompt:
This is my friend's account btw for obvious reasons.
My little sis (10) is usually forced to go to birthday parties she doesn't want to when she's invited. She can be selectively social & only likes hanging out with some kids she likes.

My mom (43) was invited to an event where a bunch of moms from my sister's school gather & gossip, play games, dance, etc. Kids were also invited & there were not going to be the few bffs that my sis hangs out with. She knew she had to go as mom was going to take her anyway and worked up a little bit of an excitement.

However, my mom started picking out her clothes for her and told her she was wearing a green turtle neck that she knows she hates. My mom loves that top on her & even when she protested, my mom told her she was wearing it and it was final. My sister screamed & cried as she didn't want to wear it and thought she looked ugly in it. She ended up wearing it and cried the whole way there.

4 months have passed and this came up in a conversation today. My mom was talking about how my sis doesn't listen to anything she says and I told her she could f*ck off. I had seen my sis that day scrubbing her face that day trying to not feel/look like sh*t to make up for the hideous top.

My parents call a family meeting and told me I was being disrespectful as a daughter (I'm 21 btw) and I should apologise to my mom for my behaviour. AITA here & should I cave? ######

Response:
 NTA your sister is a human being not a fucking doll.

You mum has issues. ######


Prompt: So my (20F) sister (18F) doesn’t have any kids however we were discussing trans kids and my sister said that if her kid came out to her as trans, she wouldn’t accept them. My sister has not always been the best but recently she gotten worse. Using the word f*ggot, using gay as a synonym for shitty, fake throwing up at gay sex scenes on tv (note: this isn’t a twelve year old being disgusted by any sex scene, she only does this with gay sex scenes). As a bisexual this has been really hard for me to put up with so after she made the trans comment, I turned round and said ‘you shouldn’t have kids then and if she did that, that’s how she would lose her kid’ (as in the kid would stop talking to her once they could). My mum just told us to stop having this conversation. AITA for telling my sister to not have kids? ######

Response: NTA Your sister is a bigot and showing social disapproval for bigotry is one of the things good people can do to decrease overall societal bigotry. It doesn't necessarily help the bigot (although it can), but it makes them more hesitant to voice their bigotry, which helps to decrease the spread of that bigotry to other people, which is beneficial. ######


Prompt: Extended family is split on this.  We’re the only family members with a pool (medium sized in ground).  It was very hot in our region last week, and one of my cousins called to ask if she and her kids could come to swim.  I said I was really sorry, but because my elderly mother-in-law lives with us, and my husband is at high risk for getting seriously sick (post kidney transplant), we had to limit our exposure, and no one outside of the household was going to be able to use the pool.  Well, I got a couple of messages from family, like, “Are you serious?  You’re not going to let a couple of little kids swim?”  So, AITA? ######

Response: NTA your reasons are totally relevant, your ext family is being selfish. Not dying is more important than not being hot for a while. ######


Prompt: I'm 15 male and my sister(21F) and I(15M) decided to die my hair bleach blond today. My siblings hairs are blond because they are blood related to my parents and my dad has diry blond hair and my mom has just straight up blond hair but I'm Korean they adopted me from Korea when I was 5. I have recently been feeling a disconnect from my family and kind of feeling like the odd one out. When I told my sister(21F) this we decided to dye my hair not because it will help me look like that cuase there is no way I can look white but to just help me feel better about myself she dyes her hair different colors and she said after she dyes her hair she feels refreshed and able to do anything she wants it give her confidence which is something I'm lacking right now. We were originally going to dye my hair blue but we just went for bleach blond. Well we did it and when my mom saw she freaked out on me and my sister. She told me I ruined my hair and blamed my sister for giving me the idea. We didnt think I needed permission to die my hair at 15 years old. AITA? ######

Response: NTA your parents are overreacting. It’s just hair. ######