Bull Durham_1988

Bull Durham
    In baseball , you do n't know nothing . - Yogi Berra . Whoever wants to know the heart and mind of America had better learn baseball . - Jacques Barzun . You could look it up . - Casey Stengel . Titles over -

FADE IN:
    A series of still photos . Black and white . Ancient . BABE RUTH SWINGS - An icon of American history . His giant upper body balanced delicately on tiny ankles and feet . The huge bat in an elegant followthrough . TY COBB ROUNDS THIRD - The most vicious ballplayer of them all , a balletic whirling dervish . JACKIE ROBINSON STEALS ROME - Yogi Berra applies the tag . Too late . JOE DIMAGGIO WITH HIS SON in the Yankee clubhouse . Walking down the runway , Joe in uniform . Number five . A WALL COVERED WITH BASEBALL PICTURES behind a small table covered with objects and lit candles . A baseball , an old baseball card , a broken bat , a rosin bag , a jar of pine tar - also a peacock feather , a silk shawl , a picture of Isadora Duncan . Clearly , the arrangement is - A SHRINE - And it glows with the candles like some religious altar . We hear a woman 's voice in a North Carolina accent .
    ANNIE
    ( V.O . )
    I believe in the Church of Baseball.
    ( beat . )
    I've tried all the major religions and most of the minor ones - I've worshipped Buddha, Allah, Brahma, Vishnu, Siva, trees, mushrooms, and Isadora Duncan.
    PAN AWAY FROM THE SHRINE across the room . Late afternoon light spills into the room , across fine old furniture , to a small dressing table . A WOMAN applies make up . ANNIE SAVOY , mid 30 's , touches up her face . Very pretty , knowing , outwardly confident . Words flow from her Southern lips with ease , but her view of the world crosses Southern , National and International borders . She 's cosmic .
    ANNIE
    ( V.O. CONT 'D . )
    I know things. For instance -.
    ( beat . )
    There are 108 beads in a Catholic rosary. And -.
    ( beat . )
    There are 108 stitches in a baseball.
    ( beat . )
    When I learned that, I gave Jesus a chance.
    ( beat . )
    But it just did n't work out between us The Lord laid too much guilt on me. I prefer metaphysics to theology.
    ( beat . )
    You see, there's no guilt in baseball. and it's never boring.
    ANNIE OPENS A CLOSET DOOR - Dozens of shoes hang from the door . She chooses a pair of RED HIGH HEELS , with thin straps . She sits on a bench and
    ANNIE
    Which makes It like sex.
    ( beat . )
    There's never been a ballplayer slept with me who did n't have the best year of his career.
    ( beat . )
    Making love is like hitting a baseball - you just got to relax and concentrate.
    ANNIE SLIPS ON THE RED HIGH HEELS - Smoothing her hands up her calves as she does .
    ANNIE
    Besides, I'd never sleep with a player hitting under.250 unless he had a lot of R.B.I.'s or was a great glove man up the middle.
    ( beat . )
    A woman's got to have standards.
    SHE HOLDS OUR HER LEGS DISPLAYING THE HEELS , side by side . Like a little girl showing off her new shoes .
    ANNIE
    The young players start off full of enthusiasm and energy but they do n't realize that come July and August when the weather is hot it's hard to perform at your peak level.
    ( beat . )
    The veterans pace themselves better. They finish stronger. They're great in September.
    ( beat . )
    While I do n't believe a woman needs a man to be fulfilled, I do confess an interest in finding the ultimate guy - he'd have that youthful exuberance but the veteran's sense of timing.
    ANNIE STARTS PACKING A HUGE HANDBAG - With fruit , an official scorebook , binoculars , a radar gun , and lipstick .
    ANNIE
    Y ` see there's a certain amount of `` life - wisdom'' I give these boys.
    ( beat . )
    I can expand their minds. Sometimes when I've got a ballplayer alone I'll just read Emily Dickinson or Walt Whitman to him. The guys are so sweet - they always stay and listen.
    ( beat . )
    Of course a guy will listen to anything if he thinks it's foreplay.
    ANNIE TOUCHES PERFUME BEHIND HER EARS and , ever so slightly , in her cleavage .
    ANNIE
    I make then feel confident. They make me feel safe. And pretty.
    ANNIE POSES IN FRONT OF THE MIRROR - She smoothes her dress along her hips . And puts on a flashy pair of sunglasses . Stylish and slightly mad .
    ANNIE
    what I give them lasts a life - time. What they give me lasts 142 games. Sometimes it seems like a bad trade.
    ( quickly rebounding . )
    but bad trades are part of baseball - who can forget Frank Robinson or Milt Pappas, for Godsakes!
    ( beat . )
    It's a long season and you got to trust it.
    ANNIE STARTS FOR THE DOOR and grabs her baseball glove

EXT.  ANNIE'S HOUSE -- DUSK
    A frame house with porch and lots of trees - a Thomas Wolfe house . with a 1959 faded red Volvo in the driveway . ANNIE LEAVES ON FOOT , turning onto the sidewalk of a bucolic , old Durham , North Carolina neighborhood . In the b.g. other people are heading the same direction ANNIE PULLS A DURHAM BULLS BASEBALL CAP from her handbag and pulls it on her head .
    ANNIE
    I've tried them all - I really have -.
    ( beat . )
    and the only church that truly feeds the soul - day in, day out - is the Church of Baseball.

EXT.  THE CHURCH -- DURHAM BASEBALL PARK -- DUSK
    Now visible In the late afternoon sun , a rickety old stadium carved into the center of an old Tobacco town . People are arriving on foot from all around . `` Rock Around the Clock '' by Bill Haley fills the air . CLOSE ON A BASEBALL CLOWN - MAX PATKIN , 60 , at home plate doing his famous Bill Haley routine . - A comic pitcher 's windup full of twists and goofy choreography .
    RECORDING OVER P.A.
    One o'clock, two o'clock, three o'clock, rock. Four o'clock, five o'clock, six o'clock rock.
    ANNIE SITS DOWN IN HER PRIVATE BOX SEAT - Her chair is wiped off by a young black boy , JACKSON , 11 , who then sits next to her . He is her employed errand runner , note sender , and friend . A GROUP OF GROUPIES ENTERS THE PARK - 20 year old girl/women , dressed in tight pants , tight everything . Friendly , eager , innocent - THEY WAVE TO ANNIE . FIVE PLAYERS ' WIVES AND THREE SMALL CHILDREN sit in a special box seat behind a small sign `` Players ' Wives '' .
    RECORDING OVER P.A.
    Seven o'clock, eight o'clock, nine o'clock rock. we're gon na rock around the clock tonight

EXT/INT.  THE DURHAM BULL DUGOUT -- NIGHT
    AS MAX PATKIN CONTINUES HIS ROUTINE , PLAYERS WARM UP , AND - THE MANAGER , JOE RIGGINS , 45 , known merely as SKIP , short for `` Skipper '' , a chaw of tobacco in his cheek , stands with his pitching coach , LARRY HOCKETT late 30 's , an ex - big leaguer whose body has seen too many cocktail lounges . LARRY ROLLS SOME RED MAN CHEWING TOBACCO into a slab of pink bubble gum , carefully folding the corners , tucking it neatly together . Larry examines it as they talk - And shoves the giant chaw into his mouth .
    SKIP
    Where's Ebby?
    LARRY
    Ai n't he warning up?
    SKIP
    ( cynically . )
    No. The guy's professional debut and he forgets about it.
    LARRY
    Better find our bonus baby, eh?
    A PLAYER , DEKE , 25 , stuffs a hot dog into his mouth .
    SKIP
    Seen Ebby?
    DEKE
    ( mouthful of food . )
    Nope.
    SKIP WHIRLS AND HEADS UP THE TUNNEL into the :

INT.  THE DURHAM CLUBHOUSE -- NIGHT
    SKIP enters , shouting -
    SKIP
    Ebby?!
    CLOSE ON A BARE ASS - Baseball uniform around the ankles , short t - shirt on top , and on top of that the head of EBBY CALVIN LALOOSH , baseball cap on backwards . EBBY is a great looking energetic man - child with the endless confidence , naivete and horniness of youth . Life is a party . A YOUNG WOMAN , MILLIE , 20 , half nude , is dressing quickly . EBBY WHIRLS as Skip enters .
    SKIP
    Jesus. Game starts in four minutes!
    ( beat . )
    Why ai n't you warm?!
    EBBY
    I am warm.
    SKIP
    I'm fining you a hundred dollars. Jesus, Ebby, this is your professional debut tonight - you know how many guys out there'd give blood to be in your shoes an' you're leavin' your fastball in the locker room for some piece of ass!
    MILLIE LOOKS OUT FROM BEHIND A BAT RACK - Outraged .
    MILLIE
    Skip, It's me! I'm not some quote piece of ass unquote.
    SKIP
    Oh, Millie, jeez, sorry - I did n't recognize ya. Do n't take it personal but if I catch you in here again you're banned from the ballpark.
    MILLIE
    You ca n't ban me from the ballpark'cause Daddy donated the scoreboard and if you banned me he might take the scoreboard away.
    SKIP
    Whatta we need a scoreboard for? We have n't scored any runs all year.
    ( tough , to Ebby . )
    Get your ass out there.
    As Skip starts to leave .
    EBBY
    Hey Boss, I got a question.
    SKIP
    ( stops , exasperated . )
    What?!
    EBBY
    You think I need a nickname? I think I need a nickname. The great ones have nicknames - somethin' like Oil Can or Catfish
    Skip stares at him . He ca n't believe this guy .
    SKIP
    Ya got three minutes.
    SKIP WHIRLS AND HEADS BACK OUT TO THE FIELD - And Ebby unperturbed , turns his attention back to Millie .
    EBBY
    Got time for another quickie?
    MILLIE
    Jesus, you got a game to pitch!
    EBBY
    But we got three minutes.

EXT.  THE BALLPARK -- MOMENTS LATER -- NIGHT
    MAX PATKIN STILL FLAILING AWAY to `` Rock Around the Clock '' .
    RECORDING
    When the clock strikes two, three, and four and the band slows down we'll yell for more, gon na rock around the clock tonight.
    ANNIE LOOKS THROUGH HER BINOCULARS - Studying the players warming up casually on the sidelines as Patkin winds up his act . P.O.V. . A LATIN PLAYER playing pepper .
    ANNIE
    Number twenty - two's thighs are just great. Who's he?
    JACKSON
    ( reading the program . )
    Jose Galindo. He hit.314 at Lynchburg last year.
    ANNIE
    Three - fourteen? Hmmm. Look' t those thighs, Jackson
    BACK TO MAX PATKIN - He finishes his routine .
    RECORDING OVER P.A.
    Gon na rock, gon na rock around the clock tonight.

INT.  PRESS BOX -- NIGHT
    A WOMAN ANNOUNCER , MARYLOU , 30 , speaks into the P.A. mike .
    ANNOUNCER
    Let's hear it for Max Patkin -
    Applause as Patkin takes his bows , leaves the field , shakes hands with a the BULL MASCOT LEADING THE APPLAUSE .
    ANNOUNCER
    `` The Greatest Show on Dirt'' - your own Durham Bulls!

INT.  THE DUGOUT
    CLOSE ON ANOTHER PLAYER - MICKEY MCFEE , 23 , black . Smoking a cigaret - always smoking a cigaret . He snuffs out his cigaret and RUNS onto the field with the rest of the team , as - EBBY ENTERS THE DUGOUT from the runway . Larry and Skip encourage their players running onto the field . Ebby is trying to get the zipper on his fly unstuck . He smiles broadly at Skip and Larry , and grabs his glove .
    EBBY
    I'm there, Skip, I'm ready.

INT.  THE PRESS BOX
    THE RADIO ANNOUNCER , TEDDY CULLINANE , 50 , leans into the radio mike of a very small local station . Next to him is the local SPORTSWRITER , WHITEY SHERRARD , 40 . Between them they 've seen a million minor league players come and go .
    WHITEY
    Is this guy LaLoosh worth a hundred grand? I hear he's a quart low?
    TEDDY THE RADIO MAN
    ( covering the mike . )
    He's left handed. Whattya expect?
    ( on the air . )
    The Bulls are off to a slow start having dropped their first three games, but hope to turn it around tonight with the professional debut of the heralded young left hander, Ebby Calvin LaLoosh.
    ( beat . )
    Stepping In for the Peninsula White Sox is leadoff hitter Willie Foster

EXT.  THE BALLFIELD -- NIGHT
    ANGLE TO ANNIE 'S BOX SEAT - Millie has joined Annie and Jackson . Clearly , the younger women look up to Annie for wisdom and insight .
    ANNIE
    - Millie, you've got to stay out of the clubhouse. It'll just get everybody in trouble.
    MILLIE
    I got lured.
    ANNIE
    You did n't get `` lured''. Women never get lured. They're too strong and powerful for that. Now say it - `` I did n't get lured and I will take responsibility for my actions''.
    MILLIE
    `` I did n't get lured and I will take responsibility for my actions''.
    ANNIE
    That's better.
    ( to Jackson . )
    Got the radar ready?
    JACKSON
    Ready.
    JACKSON AIMS A RADAR GUN at the plate . THE PENINSULA WHITE SOX LEADOFF HITTER steps in .
    TEDDY THE RADIO MAN
    ( V.O . )
    The word on LaLoosh is that the good looking young lefty has a major league fastball but sometimes has problems with his control
    EBBY CALVIN LALOOSH WINDS UP and fires . The pitch sails over the batter 's head , over the catcher 's head , over the backstop , and CRASHES INTO THE PRESS BOX .

INT.  THE PRESS BOX
    THE ANNOUNCER AND SPORTSWRITER CRASH to the floor as the ball smashes into their booth .

INT.  THE DUGOUT
    SKIP SPITS TOBACCO , mumbles flatly to Larry .
    SKIP
    Little high.
    LARRY
    ( shouts to EBBY . )
    C'mon big ` un, you're okay.
    ANNIE 'S BOX SEAT - She turns to Jackson .
    JACKSON
    Ninety - five miles an hour.
    ANNIE
    He looks great, just great!

EXT.  THE PITCHER'S MOUND
    THE CATCHER TALKS TO EBBY , trying to calm him down .
    CATCHER
    What the hell was that?! Lighten up a little. Awright?
    EBBY,
    ( to catcher . )
    Hey - what's your name again - I'm bad with names -
    CATCHER
    Ed. You want me to write it on my chest? Jesus.
    EBBY
    Sorry. Hey, Ed, I got a question.
    CATCHER
    What?
    EBBY
    Who's the beef sitting behind the third base dugout?
    CATCHER
    ( slowly . )
    That's Annie Savoy. Nice eh? But that's more woman than you ever dreamed of, Rook. She could kick your ass and have you for breakfast
    THE CATCHER RETURNS to the plate .

INT.  THE PRESS BOX
    WHITEY AND TEDDY WARILY CLIMB back to their seats .
    TEDDY
    One ball and no strikes to Willie Foster.
    EBBY 'S NEXT PITCH HITS FOSTER in the ribs . He crumples . ANNIE 'S BOX SEAT - She 's writing a note . She hands it to Jackson .
    ANNIE
    Take this to Ebby in the dugout between innings.
    JACKSON
    What's it say?
    ANNIE
    It says he's not bending his back on his follow - through.
    JACKSON RUNS OFF with the note . Annie turns to Millie .
    ANNIE
    Well let's get down to it, honey - how was he?
    MILLIE
    Well, he fucks like he pitches. Sorta all over the place
    P.O.V. EBBY LALOOSH FIRES ANOTHER ONE into the stands . And - Hit `` Rock Around the Clock '' - QUICK MONTAGE OF EBBY 'S FIRST GAME - Strikeouts and wild pitches . A young , gifted , uncontrollable thrower .
    BILL HALEY AND HIS COMETS
    When the chimes ring five, six and seven - We'll be right in Seventh Heaven, Gon na rock around the clock tonight.
    EBBY UNLEASHES A WILD ONE - And decks the Bull Mascot . EBBY IN THE DUGOUT READS THE NOTE from Annie . EBBY STRIKES OUT a Peninsula batter . EBBY UNLEASHES ANOTHER WILD ONE and a batter hits the dirt . End `` Rock Around the Clock '' and -

INT.  THE BULL LOCKER ROOM -- NIGHT
    SKIP WALKS THROUGH THE PLAYERS ROOM - Players are up , joking irreverently .
    JOSE
    Hey Lefty, hold'em to 12 runs every night, you'll win 20 -
    EBBY
    ( he might be serious . )
    Had'em all the way.
    A DURHAM PLAYER SITTING HALF DRESSED in front of his locker . A PICTURE OF JESUS hangs amidst his gear . The player , JIMMY , 25 , has a Bible and prays softly to himself .
    JIMMY
    Dear Lord, thank you for being with us tonight, thank you for protecting us from injury and -
    DEKE WALKS BY , shaking Jimmy irreverently as he prays .
    DEKE
    Wake up, wake up -
    MICKEY -LRB- A BLACK -RRB- COMPLAINS TO TONY as they undress .
    MICKEY
    This league is racist, man.
    TONY
    Every time you go 0 for 4 you think the league is racist - face it, Mick, you're an equal opportunity `` out''.
    THE MANAGER 'S OFFICE - A tiny cubicle , a desk , phone Larry joins him with the pitching charts . Skip studies the charts .
    SKIP
    He walked eighteen?!
    LARRY
    It's a league record.
    SKIP
    Struck out eighteen.
    LARRY
    League record.
    ( beat . )
    And he hit the Radio Announcer, a Sportswriter, and the Bull Mascot twice - also league records -.
    ( beat . )
    Joe, the guy's got some serious shit.
    THE DOOR OPENS - A PLAYER ENTERS , in street clothes , carrying his suitcases . CRASH DAVIS , 30 , older than the other players . And different . More than just opinions , he actually has a point of view . A career minor leaguer , hanging on wherever he can get a job . Unlike Ebby - Crash knows a lot about the world without baseball . Also unlike Ebby - he loves baseball desperately .
    LARRY
    Who're you?
    Crash speaks slowly , with a trace of cynicism and pride , like an old warrior who knows he 's just a hired gun .
    CRASH
    I am the player to be named later.
    Beat . Skip looks out , half dressed , from his cubicle .
    SKIP
    Crash Davis?
    CRASH
    The Crash Davis.
    ( beat , then nonstop . )
    . -RRB- And you, Larry Hockett, should recognize me'cause five years ago in the Texas League when you were pitching for El Paso and I was hitting cleanup for Shreveport, you hung a curve on an 0 - 2 pitch of a 3 - 2 game in bottom of the 8th and I tattooed it over the Goodyear Tire sign, beat you 4 - 3 - and I got a free wheel alignment from Goodyear.
    LARRY
    ( remembering . )
    Ohyeah. I shoulda throwed a slider. Damn, Crash, how're ya?
    SKIP
    I'm Joe Riggins. Sit down
    CRASH
    I'm too old for this shit. Why the hell am I back in `` A'' ball?
    SKIP
    'Cause of Ebby Calvin LaLoosh.
    ( beat . )
    The Big Club's got a hundred grand in him -
    LARRY
    He's got a million dollar arm and a five cent head.
    SKIP
    - we had the gun on him tonight - the last five pitches he threw were faster than the first five. 96 miles an hour, 98, 97, 97. 97.
    ( beat . )
    He's got the best young arm I've seen in 30 years.
    LARRY
    But he ai n't quite sure which plane he's on, y' know what I mean.
    SKIP
    You been around, you're smart, you're professional, you know what it takes -.
    ( beat . )
    We want you to mature the kid.
    CRASH
    `` Mature'' ai n't a fuckin' verb.
    LARRY
    You go to college or what?
    SKIP
    We want you to room with him on the road and stay on his case all year.
    ( beat . )
    He can go all the way.
    CRASH
    And where can I go?
    SKIP
    You can keep going to the ballpark and keep gettin' paid to do it.
    ( beat . )
    Beats hell outta working at Sears.
    LARRY
    Sears sucks, Crash, I tried it once. Sold Lady Kenmores - it's nasty, nasty work.
    SKIP
    Even if it's the Carolina League - this is a chance to play everyday.
    CRASH
    ( angrily . )
    You do n't want a player, you want a stable pony. My Triple A contract gets bought out so I can hold the Flavor o' the Month's dick in the bus leagues?!
    ( angrily . )
    Fuck this fucking game. I fuckin' quit.
    CRASH RISES TO LEAVE - Picks up his luggage , and turns to Skip and Larry before exiting . A deep breath
    CRASH
    Who we play tomorrow?
    Beat . They know , they share the inability to quit the game . They 're all clinging to the Church of Baseball .
    SKIP
    Winston - Salem. Batting practice at 4:30.
    CRASH LEAVES and as he does - Ed -LRB- the catcher -RRB- enters .
    ED
    You wanted to see me?
    SKIP
    Yeah, Ed, shut the door.
    He does . Remains standing . He can see it coming .
    SKIP
    This is the toughest job a manager has, Ed.
    ( deep breath . )
    But the organization has decided to make a change - we're releasing you from your contract.
    CLOSE ON ED - Silent . Motionless . Empty .

INT.  THE LOCKER ROOM -
    CRASH PUTS HIS BAG IN A LOCKER as other players return from the shower . Crash watches as EBBY SOAKS HIS ELBOW IN A TUB OF ICE WATER as the sports writer , Whitey , interviews him .
    WHITEY
    How's it feel to get your first professional win?
    EBBY
    It feels `` out there''. A major rush. I mean it does n't just feel `` out there'' but it feels out there.
    CRASH
    Hopeless. Utterly fucking hopeless.

INT.  MAXWELL'S BAR -- LATER THAT NIGHT
    Loud country music in the players ' hangout and pickup spot . It 's full of players and lots of young women . MILLIE SITS DOWN NEXT TO YET ANOTHER PLAYER , TONY , 25 - He 's slick , urban , smooth .
    MILLIE
    Hi, I'm Millie.
    TONY
    I'm Tony. I play left field.
    MILLIE
    I know.
    ANNIE SITS IN THE CORNER at her own table . Max Patkin , looking spiffy in a turtle neck sweater and double breasted blazer , sits down next to her . Old friends .
    MAX
    Love the game, Annie, love it.
    ( dead serious . )
    When I die I'm gon na have my ashes sprinkled around a pitcher's mound in some ballpark somewhere -.
    ( beat . )
    - and I'll have a few ashes saved for the rosin bag so I'll still be in the game after I'm gone.
    ANNIE
    What a sweet idea -
    A COCKTAIL WAITRESS DELIVERS another round to them .
    ANNIE
    We did n't order this, honey.
    WAITRESS
    ( she points . )
    He did.
    P.O.V. CRASH DAVIS SITTING ALONE IN THE OTHER CORNER . HE waves , and smiles easily .
    ANNIE
    ( to Max . )
    Who's that?
    MAX
    Hey - that's Crash Davis. He's played in more towns than I have. Helluva guy - real different. I actually saw him read a book without pictures once
    ANNIE
    Really? Kinda cute.
    ANNIE NODS AT CRASH - He comes over to her table , greets Max as an old friend , and introduces himself .
    CRASH
    I'm Crash Davis.
    ANNIE
    Annie Savoy. Wanta dance?
    CRASH
    I do n't dance.
    ANNIE
    I do n't trust a man who do n't dance. It ai n't natural.
    SUDDENLY - HARD CORE ROCK AND ROLL on the juke box . Several couples dance , and out of the pack - EBBY DANCES WITH A GROUPIE - Spinning and whirling , uninhibited and infectious . He 's suddenly dancing with a different WOMAN , then another , and another . ANNIE , CRASH AND MAX WATCH the mad performance .
    MAX
    Who's he dancing with?
    ANNIE
    All of'em, I think.
    EBBY PUTS ON A ONE MAN SHOW ON THE DANCE FLOOR - The whole bar stops to watch him , applauding as he spins to a finish . A quirkier `` Saturday Night Fever '' show . More naive , fun . He climbs off the floor and joins Annie 's table .
    EBBY
    Thanks for the note - you're right, I was n't bending my back.
    ANNIE
    You got a live arm there.
    He extends his hand to introduce himself .
    EBBY
    Ebby Calvin LaLoosh.
    ANNIE
    You need a nickname.
    EBBY
    That's what I been telling everybody! Wanta dance?
    CRASH
    She's dancing with me.
    ANNIE
    Crash, I did n't think you -
    CRASH
    I'll learn. C'mon -
    EBBY
    Just a minute, pal
    The two men square off quickly . Annie mocks them .
    ANNIE
    You boys gon na fight over little me?
    CRASH RISES , pulling Annie with him . But - EBBY STANDS to challenge Crash .
    EBBY
    Step outside, pal.
    CRASH
    Love to -
    ANNIE
    Oh do n't be such guys -
    But Crash and Ebby head outside . She turns to Max -
    ANNIE
    Hell, Max, wanta dance?

EXT.  THE PARKING LOT -- NIGHT
    A circle is formed . Everybody gathers . Millie clings to Tony , her guy of the moment . Crash and Ebby face off .
    CRASH
    I do n't believe in fighting.
    EBBY
    Pussy.
    CRASH
    Take the first shot at me.
    EBBY
    I ai n't hitting a man first.
    CRASH
    Hit me in the chest with this.
    CRASH PULLS A BASEBALL from his jacket pocket , tosses it to Ebby .
    EBBY
    I'd kill ya.
    CRASH
    From what I hear you could n't hit a bull in the ass with a slingshot
    EBBY
    Do n't try me.
    CRASH
    Throw it. C'mon, right in the chest.
    EBBY
    No way.
    CRASH
    C'mon, Meat. You ca n't hit me'cause you're starting to think about it already, you're starting to think how embarrassing it'll be to miss, how all these people would laugh.
    ( teasing mercilessly . )
    C'mon, Rook - show me that million dollar arm'cause I'm getting a good idea about the five cent head -
    EBBY REARS BACK AND FIRES THE BALL - From ten feet away , right at Crash 's chest . But , alas - THE BALL GOES THROUGH A SECOND STORY WINDOW in the distance . Crash never blinks .
    CRASH
    Ba11 four.
    EBBY IS ENRAGED - HE CHARGES CRASH , lunging at him .
    EBBY
    Who the fuck are you?!
    CRASH LASHES OUT A SHORT LEFT - With lightning speed , effortless . And brutal . BANG ! Ebby goes down . And stays there stunned . He looks up .
    CRASH
    I'm Crash Davis. Your new catcher. And you just got Lesson Number One - `` Do n't think - it can only hurt the ballclub''.
    ( beat . )
    Buy ya a drink?

INT.  THE CLUB -- NIGHT
    ANNIE AND MAX DANCE to Billy Eckstein on the juke box . Millie and Tony are also on the dance floor .
    ECKSTEIN
    ( ON JUKE BOX . )
    April in Paris, chestnuts in blossom, Holiday tables under the tree.
    EBBY AND CRASH WATCH FROM THE CORNER TABLE - Ebby 's right eye is blackened . He holds a drink on it .
    EBBY
    We fight, she gets the clown - how's that happen?
    CRASH
    Shut up - I like this song.
    ( sings along . )
    April in Paris, this is a feeling, No one can ever reprieve.
    EBBY
    She's playing with my mind.
    CRASH
    It's a damn easy thing to play with.
    ANNIE SUDDENLY APPEARS at the table .
    ANNIE
    Well - you boys stopped fighting yet? Are you pals now? Good. I love a little macho male bonding - I think it's sweet even if it's probably latent homosexuality being `` re - channeled'' but I believe in `` re - channeling'' so who cares, right?
    ( beat . )
    Shall we go to my place?
    EBBY
    Which one of us?
    ANNIE
    Oh both of you, of course.
    CLOSE ON EBBY - His eyes full of fear and wonder . CLOSE ON CRASH - He smiles . THE THREE OF THEM LEAVE the bar together .

INT.  ANNIE'S LIVING ROOM -- NIGHT
    THE SHRINE OF BASEBALL GLOWS - Annie lights the candles . EBBY AND CRASH SIT ON OPPOSITE ENDS OF HER COUCH - Both men look around the room with wonder . Ebby is clearly more nervous than Crash , who 's been in some strange rooms in his minor league career .
    ANNIE
    These are the ground rules.
    ( beat . )
    I hook up with one guy a season - I mean it takes me a couple of weeks to pick the guy - kinda my own spring training.
    ( beat . )
    And, well, you two are the most promising prospects of the season so far.
    ( beat . )
    So. I thought we should get to know each other.
    CRASH
    Why do you get to choose? Why do n't I get to choose?
    ANNIE
    Actually none of us on this planet ever really choose each other. It's all Quantum Physics and molecular attraction. There are laws we do n't understand that bring us together and break us apart.
    EBBY
    Is somebody gon na go to bed with somebody or what?
    ANNIE
    You're a regular nuclear meltdown, honey - slow down.
    Crash rises to leave , and heads for the door .
    CRASH
    After 12 years in the minor leagues, I do n't tryout. Besides - I do n't believe in, Quantum Physics when it comes to matters of the heart. or loins.
    ANNIE
    ( challenging him . )
    What do you believe in?
    Crash at the door . Annie 's question is slightly taunting . He stops , and speaks with both aloofness and passion :
    CRASH
    I believe in the soul, the cock, the pussy, the small of a woman's back, the hanging curve ball, high fiber, good scotch, long foreplay, show tunes, and that the novels of Thomas Pynchon are self - indulgent, overrated crap.
    ( beat . )
    I believe that Lee Harvey Oswald acted alone, I believe that there oughtta be a constitutional amendment outlawing astro - turf and the designated hitter, I believe in the `` sweet spot'', voting every election, soft core pornography, chocolate chip cookies, opening your presents on Christmas morning rather than Christmas eve, and I believe in long, slow, deep, soft, wet kisses that last for 7 days.
    ANNIE
    ( breathless . )
    Oh my.
    ( softly . )
    Do n't leave.
    CRASH
    G'night.
    Crash heads out into the night . Annie hurries to the - door while Ebby sits on the couch , bewildered .
    EBBY
    Hey - what's all this molecule stuff?
    ANNIE STANDS IN THE DOORWAY - Crash is on the porch .
    ANNIE
    Wait, Crash - do n't go - all I want is a date. I'm not gon na fall in love with you or nothin'.
    CRASH
    I'm not interested in a woman who's interested in that boy.
    ANNIE
    I'm not interested yet.
    Ebby appears in the door .
    EBBY
    Who you calling a `` boy''?
    CRASH
    See ya at the yard, Meat.
    Crash walks out into the Durham night . Ebby and Annie stand in the doorway . She speaks softly to Ebby .
    ANNIE
    No ballplayer ever said `` no'' to a date with me.
    EBBY
    Well shit, then, let's fuck.

INT.  ANNIE'S BEDROOM -- MOMENTS LATER
    ANNIE PUTS ON A RECORD - Edith Piaf sings `` Le Trois Cloches '' . EBBY STARTS UNDRESSING across the room .
    ANNIE
    Wait, honey, slow down - I want to watch.
    She sits in a chair . Piaf sings . Ebby practically rips his shirt off , exposing a great upper body .
    ANNIE
    No, no, no. Put it back on and take it off slowly.
    EBBY
    Jesus, what kinda broad are you?
    ANNIE
    When you know how to make love, you'll know how to pitch.
    ( turning to the stereo . )
    Shh. I love this part.
    Piaf sings . Annie listens . Ebby re - buttons , then unbuttons his shirt . It drops , revealing his back .
    ANNIE
    Oh my - what a nice back.
    Ebby drops his pants .
    ANNIE
    No, no, honey. first the shoes and socks.
    EBBY
    The socks? It's cold in here.
    ANNIE
    ( sweetly , unthreatening . )
    You think Dwight Gooden leaves his socks on?
    Ebby considers this . Pulls his pants back up . Takes his socks off . Then his pants .
    ANNIE
    Ebby honey have you ever been handcuffed in bed?

EXT.  DOWNTOWN DURHAM -- NIGHT
    Deserted streets of the old tobacco town . Crash walks alone . He picks up an old newspaper out of a trash can . He stops in front of a store window . He rolls the newspaper like a short bat . He takes a batting stance , and - CRASH TAKES HIS BATTING STANCE in front of the window , studying his reflection . He taken a `` swing '' . And another . A GROUP OF OLD BLACK MEN stand in a doorway , watching .

INT.  ANNIE'S BEDROOM -'CONTINUOUS NIGHT
    CLICK - A handcuff is locked onto Ebby 's wrist . Both his arms are outstretched - he 's getting very excited .
    EBBY
    Awright! I read about stuff like this. Bring it on!
    Annie calmly drags a chair over and sits down .
    ANNIE
    Sweetie, have you ever heard of Walt Whitman?
    EBBY
    Who's he play for?
    ANNIE
    Well, he sort of pitches for the Cosmic All - Stars.
    EBBY
    Never heard of'em.
    Annie opens a book and begins reading as Piaf sings softly .
    ANNIE
    Good - then listen.
    ( reading . )
    `` I sing the body electric. The armies of those I love engirth me and I engirth them -''
    EBBY
    We gon na fuck or what?
    ANNIE
    Shh, shh.
    ( reading . )
    `` They will not let me off till I go with them, respond to them, and discorrupt them and charge them''
    SAME SCENE - LATER
    ANNIE
    `` Limitless limpid jets of love hot and enormous - quivering jelly of love, white blow and delirious juice -
    CLOSE ON EBBY 'S FACE - Intrigued , aroused , frightened .

EXT.  DOWNTOWN DURHAM -- NIGHT
    THE OLD BLACK MAN is tossing wadded up balls of paper at Crash who takes beautiful , fluid swings with the rolled up newspaper . Batting practice . CLOSE ON CRASH 'S EYES - Studying the `` pitches '' with intense concentration , endlessly working on his game .

EXT.  THE DURHAM FIELD -- NEXT DAY
    LARRY , DEKE , MICKEY AND BOBBY ARE SINGING at home plate as a pre - game show . Larry is Diana Ross , the other three are the Supremes , and the routine is brilliantly tacky .
    LARRY
    ( AND THE SUPREMES . )
    Baby love, oh oh, baby love, I need ya oh how I need ya, All ya do is treat me bad, Take my heart and leave me sad.

INT.  DURHAM BULLS LOCKER ROOM -- DAY
    JIMMY STANDS ON A BENCH trying to get the players ' attention .
    JIMMY
    Listen up, guys, could I have your attention a minute?
    ( a few heads turn . )
    I'm going to be leading a daily chapel service at three In the afternoons here in the locker room and you're all invited to drop by and worship before batting practice.
    BOBBY
    Jimmy, God damn it - loosen up and get laid.
    BOBBY , 25 , smooths the creases of his uniform , preening .
    JIMMY
    I do n't care If you think I'm square but I believe what I believe.
    All heads turn as : EBBY ENTERS THE LOCKER ROOM - He looks trashed .
    BOBBY
    Jesus, Ebby, what truck ran over you?
    EBBY
    ( glassy eyed . )
    Call me `` Nuke''. Annie said it's my new nickname.
    Lots of teasing from around the clubhouse .
    DEKE
    Annie nailed you? That's great, means you're gon na have a helluva year. Does she fuck as good as they say?
    EBBY
    We did n't do it, man - she read poetry to me all night, I swear. It's more tiring than fucking.
    EBBY GOES TO HIS LOCKER and starts undressing . Crash sits next to him , looking straight ahead . Bobby nearby .
    EBBY
    - of love''. hey, Crash, does that mean what I think it means? What's the deal here?
    Crash studies Ebby .
    CRASH
    Your shower shoes have fungus on'em. You'll never get to the Bigs with fungus on your shower shoes.
    ( beat . )
    Think classy and you'll be classy. If you win 20 in the Show you can let the fungus grow back on your shower shoes and the press'll think you're colorful.
    ( beat . )
    Until you win twenty in the Show, however, it means you're a slob.
    CRASH RISES AND HEADS OUT to the field . Ebby sits silently , holding his shower shoes , taking it all in .

EXT.  DURHAM BALLPARK -- GAME IN PROGRESS -- DAY
    IN THE DUGOUT - THE GAME FROM A DUGOUT P.O.V. . The players sit , stand , stir restlessly . A combination of relaxation and intensity not visible from the stands . CRASH IS HANDED HIS BAT and helmet by the bat boy .
    DEKE
    This guy's bringing some serious smoke out there.
    DUGOUT P.O.V. . THE WINSTON - SALEM PITCHER throwing hard .
    CRASH
    He ai n't got shit.
    FOLLOW CRASH INTO THE ON - DECK CIRCLE - The ritual . The bat boy hands him the pine tar rag and he rubs pine tar on the bat with great care . CRASH RISES - Heads to the plate . Talking to himself .
    CRASH
    You ai n't getting that cheese by me, meat.
    CRASH TAKES HIS STANCE - Upright . Calm . Head still .
    CRASH
    ( VOICE OVER . )
    Look for the fastball up. He's got ta come with the cheese. Relax. Relax. Quick bat. Pop the clubhead. Open the hips. Relax. You're thinking too much. Get outta your fuckin' head, Crash.
    CLOSE ON CRASH 'S FACE - His eyes intensely focused . CRASH 'S P.O.V. . THE PITCHER - Starts his windup .
    CRASH
    ( VOICE OVER . )
    Get on top of the ball. Quick bat. Do n't let him in your kitchen -
    THE PITCHER DELIVERS - Crash strides . Curveball . Crash swings and misses , offstride . Strike one . CRASH QUICKLY STEPS OUT OF THE BOX and picks up dirt . Rubs it on his hands . He 's pissed .
    CRASH
    ( VOICE OVER . )
    You stupid fuck, Crash. What're you swinging at a breaking ball for? Why's he starting me off with a hammer? Fuck me.
    ( more dirt . )
    You're okay. Stay back. Stay back, you dumb fuck. Wait. Wait.
    P.O.V. . THE PITCHER 'S NEXT DELIVERY - CURVE BALL AWAY . CRASH STRIDES INTO THE PITCH - Lashes a line drive down the first base line . Just foul . Crash has started to first . Pulls up . Returns slowly to the plate . Picks up his bat .
    CRASH
    Throw that shit again, meat. Throw that weak ass shit.
    ( beat . )
    Now he's got ta try to slip the cheese by me. one and one.
    You 're on top . Now bring me the gas - - P.O.V. PITCHER 'S THIRD DELIVERY - High and tight . Right at Crash 's head . The ball seems to accelerate . About to explode his skull . For a moment - THE FEAR OF DEATH . CRASH HITS THE DIRT - It just misses his head . CRASH CLIMBS OUT OF THE DIRT - Brushes himself off .
    CRASH
    ( VOICE OVER . )
    This son of a bitch throws hard.
    ( beat . )
    Annie, Annie, Annie - who is this Annie?
    ( catching himself . )
    Jesus, get outta the box you idiot, where's your head? Get the broad outta your head.
    CRASH HOLDS UP HIS HAND to the ump .
    CRASH
    Time out.
    UMP
    Time out!
    CRASH STEPS OUT OF THE BOX - Motions to the bat boy for the pine tar rag . The boy brings it over . Crash re - applies it to his bat .
    BAT BOY
    Get a hit, Crash.
    CRASH
    Shut up.
    CRASH WALKS BACK TO THE BOX - Talking to himself .
    CRASH
    Awright, awright. You've seen all his pitches. Two and one. Relax. Wait. Quick bat. You can hit this shit -
    CRASH IN THE BATTER 'S BOX - Digs in - again . Takes his stance . Upright . Relaxed . Ready .
    CRASH
    ( VOICE OVER . )
    Shorten up. Bring the gas. Be quick - be quick - yeah, yeah.
    ANNIE AND JACKSON IN THE STANDS - She 's writing a note quickly , and hands it to Jackson , who hurries off . CRASH 'S P.O.V. . THE PITCHER 'S NEXT PITCH - A major league fastball . It explodes to the plate . Crash swings . And misses . Strike Three . CRASH WALKS BACK TO THE DUGOUT - Head high , no show of emotion . Almost proud . An old Warrior , not giving an inch even in defeat . HE RE - ENTERS THE DUGOUT - Sits down and starts putting the catcher 's gear back on . Deke leans over .
    DEKE
    Serious heat, eh?
    CRASH
    He ai n't got shit.
    THE BATBOY TAKES THE NOTE FROM JACKSON - And hands it to Crash , who refuses to accept it , being busy putting his gear on .
    BAT BOY
    From Annie.
    CRASH
    Read it.
    BAT BOY
    Dear Crash. You have a lovely swing but you're pulling your hips out too early. I'd be happy to meet you at the Batting Cage tomorrow to discuss it. Signed, Annie.
    DEKE
    Well if there's one chick'd know when you're pulling your hips out early, Annie's the one.
    Crash does n't seem too amused . He grabs the note , and the pen hanging from the starting lineup card taped to the dugout wall . He scrawls a quick note . ANNIE 'S PRIVATE BOX - She 's watching the players through binoculars as Jackson returns with the note .
    ANNIE
    ( looking through the glasses . )
    What'd he say?
    Jackson looks at the note uneasily , then reads -
    JACKSON
    It says. `` I want to - make. love to you. Crash''.
    ANNIE PUTS DOWN THE GLASSES - Takes the note .
    ANNIE
    Oh my.

EXT.  A LOCAL BATTING CAGE DAY
    ANNIE DIGS IN AT THE PLATE - Bat in hand . Crash a few feet away . Annie spits on her hands , wear batting glove , pumps the bat back and forth . THE MECHANICAL PITCHING MACHINE DELIVERS - Kawoosh . ANNIE SWINGS - Lashes out a line drive . Crash smiles .
    ANNIE
    See my hips?
    CRASH
    Yep.
    ANNIE
    I think Thomas Pynchon's a genius.
    CRASH
    When you're hitting you should n't think about anything but hitting.
    ( beat . )
    But you should n't think about it too much. The trick is to use your brain to not use your brain.
    ANNIE
    But you were pulling your hips last night.
    CRASH
    So. Wanta make love?
    ANNIE SWINGS AND MISSES the next pitch .
    ANNIE
    I'm committed to Nuke for the season. You had your chance the other night.
    CRASH
    What ` you see in that guy - he's dim, pretty boy. a young, wild,
    ANNIE
    Young men are uncomplicated.
    ( Crash mutters . )
    And he's not `` dim''. He's just inexperienced. My job is to give him `` life - wisdom'' and help him make it to the major leagues.
    CRASH
    That's my job too.
    ANNIE SWINGS AND MISSES another pitch .
    ANNIE
    Damn.
    CRASH
    You're pulling your hips out.
    ANNIE
    But they're nice hips.
    ( beat . )
    I looked up your records - You've hit 227 home runs in the minors. That's great!
    ANNIE FOULS ONE OFF and digs in gamely .
    CRASH
    Do n't tell anybody.
    ANNIE
    Why not? If you hit twenty homers this year you'll be the all time minor league champ! The record's
    CRASH
    247 home runs in the minors would be a dubious honor, if ya think about it.
    ANNIE
    Oh no, I think it'd be great! The Sporting News should know about it.
    CRASH
    No. Please.
    ANNIE SWINGS AND MISSES another one .
    ANNIE
    Damn.
    CRASH
    Let me.
    CRASH STEPS IN TO HIT - He takes his familiar stance . The pitch comes . Crash drills it .
    CRASH
    Your place or mine?
    ANNIE
    Despite my love of weird metaphysics and my rejection of most Judao - Christian ethics, I am, within the framework of a baseball season, monogamous.
    CRASH
    Fact is you're afraid of meeting a guy like me'cause It might be real so you sabotage it with some bullshit about commitment to a young boy you can boss around -.
    ( whack - a line drive . )
    Great deal. You get to write self - indulgent little poems all winter about how hard it is to find a man even though you just sent him packing -.
    ( whack - a line drive . )
    So what do you really want? You wanta be a tragic woman figure wallowing in the bullshit of magic?
    ( whack - a line drive . )
    Or do you want a guy?
    The pitching machine arm flaps . Empty . Silence .
    ANNIE
    Oh Crash. you do make speeches.
    Crash puts the bat down , heads out the gate . She follows . A LITTLE LEAGUE TEAM ARRIVES - Twenty - five 10 year olds in uniform with a couple PARENT COACHES .
    LITTLE LEAGUER #1
    Hey, are you Crash Davis! Can I have a autograph?!
    CRASH STOPS TO SIGN AUTOGRAPHS amidst 25 Little Leaguers .
    CRASH
    ( as he signs autographs . )
    Well, Annie, your place or mine?
    ANNIE
    You got me all confused.
    CRASH
    A batter has two tenths of a second to decide whether to swing -
    ANNIE
    I'm not a real batter. I'm a woman.
    LITTLE LEAGUER
    Hey, when are you guys gon na start winning? You're terrible!
    ANNIE
    It's a long season, boys.
    SUDDENLY A VOICE - Nuke pulls up , gets out of his Porsche .
    NUKE
    Hey!
    ( coming over . )
    What're you guys doing here - stealing my girl?
    CRASH
    Now, Nuke, would I do a thing like that?
    ( to the little leaguers . )
    Hey kids, this is the great Ebby Calvin `` Nuke'' LaLoosh.
    LITTLE LEAGUERS
    It's Nuke, it's Nuke! Can I have your autograph?! etc..
    NUKE
    No prob, kids -
    And suddenly Nuke is swept up into a sea of Little Leaguers . Crash smiles as he turns Annie and the kids over to Nuke .
    CRASH
    See you guys at the ballpark.
    Crash leaves Annie with Nuke and 25 Little Leaguers .

EXT.  CRASH GETS INTO HIS CAR -- CONTINUOUS
    AN AGING SHELBY MUSTANG CONVERTIBLE - The paint 's fading , a couple dings in the body , but loaded under the hood . CRASH PUNCHES HIS TAPE DECK - Sam Cooke 's `` You Send Me '' . ANNIE BITES HER FIST watching Crash leave .

INT.  ANNIE'S BEDROOM -- DAY
    The sounds of lovemaking in a darkened room lit only by a few candles .
    ANNIE
    Yes, yes, yesnmmmmyes.
    ( beat . )
    Oh my.
    ( several beats . )
    Oh, that was just fabulous, Crash.
    Several beats of silence .
    NUKE
    Crash?
    He flips on a lamp near the bed .
    NUKE
    You mean Nuke. You said `` Crash''.
    ANNIE
    I did n't say `` Crash''. I said Nuke.
    NUKE
    You said `` Crash''.
    ANNIE
    Honey, do n't ever listen to a woman when she's making love. They'll say the strangest things.
    NUKE
    You said `` Crash''.
    ANNIE
    Would you rather me be making love to him, using your name, or making love to you, using his name?
    Nuke considers this fabulous logic .
    NUKE
    Yeah maybe you're right.
    ANNIE
    You see how nice things are when we go slow?
    Nuke sighs ; and lets his head sink in the pillow .
    NUKE
    Mmm, hmmm.
    ( beat . )
    You shoulda seen how many people came to the airport to see me off. When I got drafted first it was the happiest day of my Father's life.
    ( beat . )
    He likes baseball more than I do.
    ANNIE
    You can learn to like it.
    NUKE
    I wanted to be the host of Dance Fever, somethin' like that.
    ANNIE
    Y' know if you make it to the Bigs you could still become the host of Dance Fever. Baseball's a good stepping stone for things like that.
    NUKE
    God, I never thought of that.
    ANNIE
    ( sweetly . )
    There is a lot of things you never thought of, sweetie - now get some rest for tonight's game.
    Nuke rests his head on Annie 's shoulder . His eyes are wide open and full of nervous energy .

EXT.  DURHAM BASEBALL PARK -- DUSK
    NUKE ON A PAY PHONE - In his uniform . Players warming up in the background as the ground crew prepares the field .
    NUKE
    Hello? Dad? This is Ebby.
    ( beat . )
    Yeah, I know, I know - you got the Durham papers yet? Well I been a little wild.
    ( defensively . )
    These hitters down here are better than the ones in high school.
    ( trying to change subject . )
    How's Mom? Yeah? Well I am trying hard. I am bending my back. you're not coming down' here to visit just yet, are you?
    ( beat . )
    Can I talk to Mom?

EXT.  HOME PLATE -- THE BALLPARK NIGHT
    THE MAYOR OF DURHAM AND THE CITY COUNCIL stand at a mike in front of home plate . 300 LITTLE LEAGUERS in uniform are lined up along the foul line , restrained by a rope .
    VOICE OVER P.A.
    Ladies and gentlemen, the Mayor of Durham, the honorable Mutt Clark.
    THE MAYOR STEPS to the mike . A classic Southern mayor .
    MAYOR
    Welcome to the `` Atlantic Seaboard Tobacco Growers City Council Little League Cash Drop Night''!
    As the honorable Mutt Clark drones on - we INTERCUT :

EXT.  THE BULLPEN -- CONTINUOUS
    NUKE IS WARMING UP TO PITCH - Crash and Larry watch him closely , giving advice . As Nuke delivers - .
    CRASH
    Drive off your back leg. You pitch with your legs as much as your arms -
    NUKE
    I thought I was -
    CRASH
    Do n't think.
    A MANGY DOG EATS FROM A DISH provided by the players . A couple kids sit with the players . MILLIE SITS DOWN NEXT TO A PLAYER - BOBBY , 25 .
    MILLIE
    Hi, I'm Millie.
    BOBBY
    I'm married.
    JOSE FASHIONS A SMALL CROSS OUT OF CHICKEN BONES and rubs it on his bat . Bobby notices this .
    BOBBY
    What's that?
    JOSE
    Chicken bone cross take the curse off this bat and bring me hits.
    BOBBY
    You a God damn witch?
    JOSE
    Yes. A switch hitting witch. Very common in Puerto Rico.
    BOBBY
    Will that work for me?
    JOSE
    If you believe in Voodoo.
    BOBBY
    I'm 0 for 16! Gim me some of that shit.
    BOBBY HOLDS OUT HIS BAT for Jose to rub with the cross .
    JOSE
    No, that is not belief. That is desperation.
    BOBBY
    C'mon, God damn it, gim me some!
    ALL HEADS TURN , - A HELICOPTER APPEARS ABOVE THE FIELD BACK TO THE MAYOR AND CITY COUNCIL - Hair and hats blowing from the chopper turbulence .
    MAYOR
    five, four, three, two, one. let ` er go! One thousand big ones!
    THE HELICOPTER DUMPS HUNDREDS OF DOLLAR BILLS above the field . The night sky fills with fluttering money THE ROPE IS DROPPED - THREE HUNDRED LITTLE LEAGUERS charge across the infield to the falling money , scooping it up wildly , brawling , shoving , clawing for the cash . As the money flutters down .

EXT.  DURHAM BASEBALL STADIUM -- SHORT TIME LATER
    CLOSE ON THE ROSIN BAG on the mound . A hand picks it up . Puffs of rosin `` smoke '' . Nuke is on the mound . NUKE NERVOUSLY WALKS AROUND THE MOUND - Just before the first batter . He picks up the rosin bag . Digs a slot for his lead foot to land . And CRASH APPROACHES , in full gear , mask tipped up on his head .
    CRASH
    Do n't try to strike everybody out.
    ( beat . )
    Strikeouts are boring. They're Fascist. Throw some ground balls, it's more Democratic.
    CRASH TURNS AND HEADS TO THE PLATE and we hear the beginning of Nuke 's interior monologue .
    NUKE
    ( VOICE OVER . )
    What's this guy know, eh? If he's so great why's he been in the minors for ten years? And if he's so hot how come Annie wants me instead of him.
    CRASH TURNS AROUND HALF WAY TO THE PLATE and returns to the mound , as if he knows everything Nuke 's thinking .
    CRASH
    And listen, meat. You do n't know shit. If you want to get to the Show, you'll listen to me. She only wants you'cause she can boss you around, got it?
    ( beat , complete tone change . )
    Relax, have a ball out here. This game's fun, okay? Fun, God damn it.
    ( beat . )
    And do n't squeeze the ball so tight. It's an egg. Hold it like an egg.
    CRASH SMILES - And trots back to the plate . NUKE 'S P.O.V. . The first batter steps in . Crash gives the sign for the pitch .
    NUKE
    Fun? What's he know about fun?
    ( beat . )
    Why's he calling for a curveball? I wanta bring heat.
    CRASH
    ( VOICE OVER . )
    Shake off the pitch. Throw what you wanta.
    NUKE SHAKES OFF THE PITCH - Here comes Crash back out to the mound before Nuke 's thrown a pitch .
    CRASH
    Why you shaking me off?
    NUKE
    I wanta throw the heater to announce my presence with authority.
    CRASH
    `` To announce your fucking presence with authority''? This guy's a first ball fastball hitter. He's looking for heat.
    NUKE
    But he ai n't seen my heat -
    CRASH
    Awright, meat, give him your heat.
    CRASH RETURNS ONE MORE TIME to behind the plate . CRASH CROSSES THE PLATE , past the hitter . He speaks to the opposing leadoff batter .
    CRASH
    Fastball.
    NUKE
    ( VOICE OVER . )
    Why's he always call me `` Meat''? I'm the guy driving a Porsche.
    NUKE WINDS UP AND DELIVERS - A fastball . THE LEADOFF HITTER TEES OFF on the pitch and sends a line shot over the right field fence . CLOSE ON BILLBOARD - `` Hit Cow , Win Steak '' sign , The home run hits the cow on a target painted on the cow 's rump . The COW 'S MOUTH OPENS AND MOOS . THE BATTER STANDS AND WATCHES the home run , admiring the shot , enjoying the moment . CRASH GETS IN HIS FACE instantly - and gets very tough .
    CRASH
    What're you lookin' at?! You're showing up my pitcher, bush - get your ass in gear!
    THE BATTER TAKES OFF ON A HOME RUN TROT - Slightly scared . AND CRASH HEADS TO THE MOUND where Nuke watches the Mooing Cow and the circling batter with dismay . Crash smiles .
    CRASH
    Guy hit the shit outta that one, eh?
    NUKE
    Well, I held it like an egg.
    CRASH
    An' he scrambled the son of a bitch.
    ( beat . )
    Having fun yet?
    NUKE
    I'm having a blast.
    ( beat . )
    God, that sucker teed off on it just like he knew I was gon na throw a fastball.
    CRASH
    He did know.
    NUKE
    How?
    CRASH
    I told him.
    CRASH SMILES - Drops the mask , returns behind the plate . NUKE SIGHS - Takes a deep breath .
    NUKE
    Do n't think. Just throw. Do n't think. Just throw.
    NUKE 'S WINDUP AND DELIVERY - A fastball . A powerful , clean , overwhelming fastball . Strike one .
    NUKE
    ( VOICE OVER . )
    God, that was beautiful. What'd I do?
    NUKE WINDS UP AND DELIVERS HIS NEXT PITCH - A monster . An Ebby Calvin `` Nuke '' LaLoosh fastball . Twenty feet wide of the plate . THE BULL MASCOT DIVES FOR COVER - The ball hits the bat rack . Bats go flying . ANNIE IN HER BOX SEAT - Jackson with the radar gun .
    ANNIE
    Oh dear. easy honey.
    JACKSON
    Ninety - five miles an hour.
    BACK TO NUKE - Pacing the mound . Looks In for the sign . NUKE PITCHES AGAIN - The batter lines a single to left . NUKE 'S P.O.V. . THE MANAGER AND PITCHING COACH TALKING
    NUKE
    ( VOICE OVER . )
    Christ, Skip and Larry are talking about me. Do n't get anybody warm in the pen yet. I'm okay. I'm having fun.
    NUKE PITCHES AGAIN - The batter lines a single to right . NUKE 'S P.O.V. . THE BULLPEN - TWO PITCHERS start warming up .
    NUKE
    ( VOICE OVER . )
    Do n't yank me in the first, man.
    NUKE 'S P.O.V. - THE MANAGER comes out to the mound to talk .
    NUKE
    ( VOICE OVER . )
    Aw, shit.
    THE MANAGER AND CRASH MEET NUKE on the mound .
    SKIP
    Relax.
    NUKE
    Do n't pull me, Skip. I'll settle down. I'm okay!
    SKIP
    ( fatherly . )
    Relax, Nuke, Relax.
    ( to Crash . )
    What kinda stuff's he got?
    CRASH
    I do n't know. I have n't caught anything yet.
    SKIP
    What're you thinking about out here, Nuke?
    NUKE
    I'm trying not to think.
    SKIP
    Good. But just'cause you ai n't s ` posed to think do n't mean you ai n't s ` posed to use your head.
    SKIP SLAPS NUKE ON THE ASS in a gruff , reassuring way , and returns to the dugout . Leaving Nuke and Crash .
    CRASH
    Have some fun, God damn it.
    CRASH SMILES - And as he returns to the plate . ANNIE WATCHES IN THE STANDS with Jackson and the radar gun .
    ANNIE
    Here we go again, Jackson, hold on tight.
    Hit Professor Longhair rock and roll . and : NUKE DELIVERS - A batter grounds out weakly . DURHAM AT BAT - DUGOUT - Crash lets Jose rub his bat with a chicken bone cross . Then steps to the plate and - CRASH HITS A LONG HOME RUN - And circles the bases . NUKE DELIVERS - A line drive nearly undresses him . Runners circle the bases .

INT.  LOCKER ROOM -- NIGHT
    THE SHOWERS - Naked bodies in the steamy room . No joking around . A team on losing streak . SUDDENLY SKIP STEPS INTO THE SHOWER in his uniform and angrily throws an armload of bats into the shower .
    SKIP
    Anybody not outta the shower in ten seconds gon na get fined a hundred bucks. One, two.
    THE SHOWER EMPTIES in seconds . Players grab a seat , and : WHITEY THE SPORTSWRITER ENTERS as he does every night .
    SKIP
    No press for five minutes, Whitey.
    WHITEY
    I'm doing a column on the Myth of Sisyphus as manifest in a minor league losing streak, Joe, and I thought
    SKIP PICKS UP A CHAIR AND FIRES IT AT WHITEY - The chair crashes into a locker . Whitey hurries out .
    SKIP
    If I ever need a brain transplant I'll choose a sportswriter'cause that way I'd be getting a brain that's never been used.
    A couple snickers from the players . Skip whirls .
    SKIP
    What're you laughing at?!
    Silence . The Durham Bulls sit and stand quietly .
    SKIP
    You guys lollygag the ball around the infield, ya lollygag you're - way to first, ya lollygag in an' outta the dugout. You know what that makes ya.
    ( beat . )
    Lollygaggers. What's our record, Larry?
    LARRY
    We're eight and sixteen.
    SKIP
    Eight and sixteen?! How'd we ever win eight?
    ( beat . )
    Jose, what's this sign?
    SKIP FLASHES THROUGH A SEQUENCE of signs . Hand to face , hand to belt , hand brushes letters , etc. .
    JOSE
    That's the steal.
    SKIP
    Wrong. That's the bunt. This is the steal.
    SKIP FLASHES QUICKLY ANOTHER SEQUENCE - Hand to face , hands to hands . He speaks rapidly - a private language .
    SKIP
    Face is `` skin to skin''. Skin starts with `` S''. `` S'' stands for steal if it follows the indicator which is hand to eye'cause the word `` indicator'' starts with an `` I'' so I figure `` eye'' -.
    ( touches his eye . )
    - would remind you of `` I'' for indicator to indicate that what follows is the sign. I figure wrong - You're a buncha lollygaggers.
    ( beat . )
    This is a simple game.
    ( beat . )
    ya throw the ball, ya hit the ball, ya catch the ball.
    CLOSE ON FACES OF THE PLAYERS - Sitting silently .

EXT.  THE BALLPARK SIMULTANEOUS -- NIGHT
    THE SIX PLAYERS ' WIVES WAIT in a cluster . Three of them have SMALL CHILDREN . The children are crying . The long - suffering women try to calm the kids .
    BOBBY'S WIFE
    Bobby went hitless again. He's gon na be in a terrible mood. terrible. How'd Mickey do?
    MICKEY'S WIFE
    He got two hits.
    BOBBY'S WIFE
    Lucky you.
    BACK INSIDE THE LOCKER ROOM - Skip is winding down .
    SKIP
    We ca n't win at home - how we gon na win on the road? We got a twelve day road trip starting tomorrow.
    ( beat . )
    Bus leaves at six In the morning.
    SKIP HEADS BACK INSIDE his little office with Larry . INSIDE SKIP 'S OFFICE - He and Larry open a couple beers . THE DOOR OPENS - BOBBY ENTERS wearing only a towel .
    BOBBY
    You wanted to see me?
    SKIP
    Yeah, Bobby, shut the door.
    ( he does . )
    This is the toughest job a manager has.
    ( beat . )
    But the organization has decided to make a change -
    BOBBY
    Skip, I know I'm in a slump but I hit the ball hard tonight, right at'em. A couple flares drop in, and I'm back in the groove!
    The nearly naked 25 year old man pleads helplessly - his career is over .

EXT.  THE STADIUM -- NIGHT
    THE PLAYERS EXIT - The Groupies wait in a cluster . The wives wait in another group . Bobby 's wife sees Bobby .
    BOBBY'S WIFE
    ( to child . )
    There's Daddy! Wave to Daddy!
    - P.O.V. BOBBY COMING OUT OF THE CLUBHOUSE - Another player has his arm around Bobby , consoling him . The wife knows .
    BOBBY'S WIFE
    Oh God.

EXT.  STADIUM PARKING LOT -- DAWN
    THE DURHAM BULLS TEAM BUS is parked . Luggage is loaded . Sleepy players arriving , escorted by wives and girlfriends . ANNIE BIDS NUKE GOODBYE - Off to the side . She pulls something from her handbag and hands it to Nuke . A pair of WOMEN 'S RED PANTIES , with lace and frills .
    ANNIE
    I want you to wear these on the road trip when you pitch.
    NUKE
    What?
    ANNIE
    They'll fit snugly against your balls in such a wonderful way that you'll start seeing things differently - plus they'll remind you of me which is better than thinking about those nasty hitters.
    NUKE
    Jesus, Annie, I do n't know -
    ANNIE
    You've been pitching out of the wrong side of your brain. These'll help move things to the right side.
    NUKE
    Big League pitchers do n't use these.
    ANNIE
    They did when they were in the Carolina League.
    NUKE STUFFS THE PANTIES in his pocket , bewildered . A small kiss from Annie , and he hurries to the bus .

INT.  LOCKER ROOM -- DAWN
    PLAYERS THROW THEIR GEAR into their travel bags . A PAPER BEER CUP IS TAPED TO THE WALL - With a sign : `` Married men deposit wedding rings here for road trips '' . CLOSE ON THE CUP - A ring is dropped in , and another , and . We begin hearing Annie 's VOICE OVER :
    ANNIE
    ( VOICE OVER . )
    A woman should never ask questions about road trips.

EXT.  THE PARKING LOT -- DAWN
    THE TEAM BUS PULLS OUT - Wives and girlfriends head back to their apartments , leaving : ANNIE WALKING BACK ROME - Several blocks to her house .
    ANNIE
    ( VOICE OVER . )
    Men do n't realize that women always know when they've been unfaithful.
    ( beat . )
    The fact is, upon exact moment of penetration - the woman knows.
    AS ANNIE WALKS BACK through Durham .

EXT.  HIGHWAY THROUGH THE SMOKY MOUNTAINS EARLY MORNING
    THE TEAM BUS ROLLS through the North Carolina landscape .
    ANNIE
    ( VOICE OVER . )
    This sort of spiritual awareness can be a mixed blessing, especially if you're dating a ballplayer. I believe a woman oughta take care of her man so thoroughly that he can go on the road for a few days without having the desire to search out another pair of panties.
    ( self - aware . )
    That is probably, however, my most ridiculous belief.
    ( sigh . )
    I just hope the boys start winning soon. In some profound way I fear that a last place team is a reflection on its women.
    THE BUS ROLLS through North Carolina .

INT.  THE BUS -- MORNING
    SKIP SITS IN THE FRONT of the bus , doing a crossword puzzle . LARRY READS A BOOK - `` How to Make a Million Dollars in Real Estate with No Money Down '' . DEKE TURNS UP HIS TAPE DECK - George Jones sings `` He Stopped Loving Her Today '' . MICKEY TURNS UP HIS TAPE DECK across the aisle - Aretha Franklin sings `` R - E - S - P - E - C - T '' . DEKE TURNS HIS VOLUME LOUDER - Mickey does likewise , and soon we have DUELING TAPE DECKS . C & W going head to head with R & B . A cacophony . SKIP LEAPS TO HIS FEET , WHIRLS and shouts .
    SKIP
    I got one word to say to you - Shut up!
    Silence . And then from the back of the bus , some soft , gentle , but slightly dissonant guitar chords . THE BACK OF THE BUS - Nuke sits across the aisle from Crash , who 's re - reading Thomas Pynchon . Nuke has a guitar and is struggling with some chords to `` Try a Little Tenderness '' . He butchers the chords and the words .
    NUKE
    ( singing softly . )
    Oh she may get wooly, women do get wooly, because of all the stress.
    CRASH
    ( in disgust . )
    Gim me that.
    CRASH STRONGARMS THE GUITAR from Nuke .
    CRASH
    I hate people who get the words wrong. It ai n't `` woolly'' it's `` weary'' and it nobody's got stress, they're wearing a dress.
    ( beat . )
    Listen.
    CRASH WHIPS THROUGH THE FIRST FEW BARS of the song .
    CRASH
    ( sings softly . )
    Oh she may be weary, Young girls do get weary, Wearing the same old dress.
    HE SHOVES THE GUITAR back at Nuke .
    NUKE
    How come you do n't like me?
    CRASH
    'Cause you do n't respect yourself, which is your problem, but you do n't respect the game - and that's my problem.
    ( beat . )
    You got a gift.
    NUKE
    What do I got?
    CRASH
    A gift. When you were a baby the gods reached down and turned your left arm into a thunderbolt.
    Nuke looks at his left arm rubs his shoulder curiously .
    CRASH
    You got a Hall of Fame arm but you're pissing it away.
    NUKE
    I ai n't pissing nothing away - I got a Porsche already. A 944 with A.C. and a quadraphonic Blaupunkt.
    CRASH
    You do n't need a quadraphonic Blaupunkt - you need a curve ball.
    ( beat . )
    In the Show, everybody can hit the fastball.
    NUKE
    You been in the Majors?
    CRASH
    Yep.
    Tony and Deke overhear this and turn around . And Crash gets wistful , lyrical , and even slightly hopeful .
    CRASH
    I was in the Show for 21 days, once.
    ( beat . )
    It was the greatest 21 days of my life. You never touch your luggage in the show - somebody else handles your bags. It's great.
    ( beat . )
    The ballparks are like cathedrals, the hotels all have room service, the women have long legs and brains - it's a smorgasbord.
    DEKE
    The women are hot, eh?
    CRASH
    Yeah - and so are the pitchers. They throw ungodly breaking stuff in the Show - exploding sliders.
    Nuke , Tony , and Deke murmur in awe at Crash 's pronouncement .
    CRASH
    You could be one of those guys - but you do n't give a fuck, Meat.
    NUKE
    God damn it I'm sick of you calling me `` Meat''! You wanta step outside!
    CRASH HOPS TO HIS FEET as the bus barrels along , grabbing Nuke by the collar .
    CRASH
    Yeah, let's go.
    Nuke quickly has second thoughts - Crash can be terrifying .
    NUKE
    No. Wait a minute. Calm down, Crash.
    Nuke sits back down . Calms . Reaches for a baseball sitting nearby . He hands the ball to Crash .
    NUKE
    Teach me how to throw a breaking ball.
    Crash takes the ball gently and speaks softly :
    CRASH
    As I was saying ya hold it like an egg.
    As the bus rolls through the country : A LATE 60 'S OLDS CONVERTIBLE ROARS PAST - Max Patkin at the wheel . He waves at the team bus and honks . The opening bars on the National Anthem - `` Oh Say Can You See '' And Max roars off through the rolling green - landscape . Hit Hank Williams music to play over :

EXT.  WINSTON-SALEM BASEBALL STADIUM -- DAY
    MAX PATKIN COACHES THIRD in his comic routine , now , for the Winston - Salem team , as Durham is in the field . A WINSTON - SALEM BATTER lines a double off the wall .

INT.  DURHAM RADIO STATION -- DAY
    TEDDY THE ANNOUNCER re - creates the game for broadcast with a several second delay . HIS ASSISTANT -LRB- P.A. ANNOUNCER FROM THE BALLPARK -RRB- has a phone to her ear , and writes down each play on a piece of paper , holding it up for Teddy who enhances shamelessly in his ON THE AIR `` play by play '' . CLOSE ON PAPER - His assistant writes `` DOUBLE TO LEFT '' . TEDDY HITS A TINY MALLET against a jar . Thunk . The sound of ball hitting bat . He punches one of several tape cassettes cued up . A crowd roars . An array of special effects is at his fingertips .
    TEDDY
    ( ON THE AIR . )
    double off the wall by Higgins, and once again the Durham pitchers are unable to get the first out of the Inning.
    HIS . ASSISTANT WRITES ANOTHER NOTE - `` ERROR MCFEE '' Thunk - The mallet again .
    TEDDY
    ( ON THE AIR . )
    Line drive to center - a diving stab by McFee - oohhhh! Ball gets by his glove, another run in and the crowd loves it -
    PUNCHES A CASSETTE - A crowd roars .

EXT.  HIGHWAY THROUGH SMOKY MOUNTAINS -- NIGHT
    The bus rolls through a small town .

EXT.  CHEAP MOTEL IN GREENSBORO -- DAWN
    THE TEAM BUS PULLS IN - Players stagger off , half asleep .
    TEDDY
    ( ON THE AIR . )
    Bulls will attempt to end a six game losing streak against the Greensboro Astros with Nuke LaLoosh on the hill.

INT.  GREENSBORO BALLPARK LOCKER ROOM -- DAY
    NUKE DRESSES FOR THE GAME - He pulls the RED PANTIES out of his bag . Looks around the clubhouse . Nobody sees them . He 's embarrassed anyway - and stuffs them back .

EXT.  GREENSBORO BALLPARK DAY
    NUKE WINDS AND DELIVERS - The batter swings , and :

INT.  RADIO STATION -- DAY
    TEDDY AND HIS ASSISTANT - A note is held up , `` Single '' - THUNK - The mallet strikes .
    TEDDY ON THE AIR
    Base hit centerfield off LaLoosh.
    HIS ASSISTANT -LRB- ON THE PHONE -RRB- SCRAWLS another quick note . THUNK THUNK THUNK - A rapid sequence of the mallet striking the percussive box , and :
    TEDDY ON THE AIR
    That closes the book on LaLoosh today, 5 earned runs, 5 hits, 5 strikeouts, 5 walks, 5 wild pitches.

EXT.  GREENSBORO BALLPARK -- DAY
    SKIP REMOVES NUKE FROM THE GAME and he heads for the showers .

INT.  ANNIE'S KITCHEN -- DAY
    ANNIE SITS WITH MILLIE at the kitchen table , listening to the radio . Annie sighs . Millie consoles her .

INT.  GREENSBORO LOCKER ROOM -- DAY
    NUKE IN THE SHOWERS ALONE - Letting the water run over him . The voice of Teddy an the air , editorializing shamelessly .
    TEDDY
    ( ON THE AIR . )
    It's time to tell it like it is, sports fans - and this is the most wretched road trip I've seen in 20 years, and possibly the worst Durham team in half a century.
    ( beat . )
    Where are the great Bull players of yesteryear? Where are the Footsie Blakes, the Digger O'Dells, the Gus Palowitzes?
    TEDDY 'S VOICE PLAYS OVER road trip images : NUKE STARTS TO PUT ON THE RED PANTIES - Changes his mind , and hides them again . THE TEAM BUS rolling across North Carolina . THE TEAM BUS at a drive through hamburger stand somewhere in the Smoky Mountains . Sack after sack of fast food is passed through the window to Skip . THE TEAM BUS PULLS INTO YET ANOTHER HOTEL and this time , a Bus with a sign - `` Holiday on Ice '' pulls in next to them .
    TEDDY ON THE AIR
    Is the modern athlete a pale imitation of the great old warriors? Only Crash Davis stands out this year, begging the question, `` What are these boys thinking about,'cause it sure ai n't baseball''.

EXT/INT.  THE BUS IN FRONT OF THE KINGSTON HOTEL -- NIGHT
    As the players rise in the bus , Deke is trying to work up excitement about the `` Holiday on Ice '' bus from which twenty great looking women ice skaters are getting off . P.O.V. HOLIDAY ON ICE GIRLS getting off the bus .
    TONY
    Ice skaters. God. Look' t em. that's what we need, y' know - one night with some skaters and we can get back on track.
    DEKE
    We need a night off just to stop our losing streak. We need a rainout.
    CRASH
    I can get us a rainout.
    MICKEY
    It's 90 degrees, there ai n't been a cloud in the sky in weeks.
    CRASH
    Hundred bucks says I can get us a rainout tomorrow.
    TONY
    You're on.

EXT.  KINGSTON BASEBALL STADIUM -- NIGHT
    A CAB PULLS UP in the dark . Late at night . The cab leaves , and the four men climb over the fence .

EXT.  INSIDE THE KINGSTON BALLPARK -- NIGHT
    CRASH PULLS THE LID OFF A BOX - Several valve handles . Crash turns several handles with an iron bar , and . THE SPRINKLER SYSTEM COMES TO LIFE - And suddenly the field is covered with the clicking of rain - bird sprinklers , throwing long slow arcs of water across the entire field .

EXT. THE SCOREBOARD OF THE BALLPARK -- MINUTES LATER - NIGHT
    THE FOUR PLAYERS sit on the scoreboard , watching the sprinklers flood the field . A six - pack is passed around .

EXT.  THE BALLPARK -- EARLY THE NEXT MORNING
    A QUAGMIRE ON THE INFIELD - The Kingston GENERAL MANAGER stands in the muck with his ground crew . Wheelbarrows , shovels , sand is piled around . It 's hopeless .
    KINSTON G.M.
    God damn it! Vandals. Damn kids!
    GROUND CREW MEMBER
    We ca n't get it ready by game time, boss.
    The General Manager studies the field . Hopeless . He looks up at the sky . Cloudless , sunny .
    KINSTON G.M.
    ( to his assistant . )
    Call the radio and the paper.
    ( with disgust . )
    The game's been rained out.
    Organ music - `` The Blue Danube Waltz '' .

INT.  THE KINGSTON CIVIC ARENA -- DAY
    `` HOLIDAY ON ICE '' in its matinee performance . The beautiful , leggy women skating to the `` Blue Danube Waltz '' . TEN OF THE DURHAM BULLS sit in the front row . Nuke , Deke , Tommy , others , but not Crash . ` Tony waves to a skater . THE SKATER WAVES BACK as she swirls past the Bulls .

INT.  THE KINGSTON HOTEL ROOM -- NIGHT
    DEKE ICES THE CHAMPAGNE - In the b.g. Tommy is blow drying his hair . Mickey puts the finishing touches on his outfit . Several other players get ready to party .
    DEKE
    Par - ty! I blew a whole day's meal money for this champagne seven dollars, man, it better be good.
    MICKEY
    For seven bucks it better be some serious shit.
    TOMMY
    What time is it, eh? When are they coming?
    The guys lounge around nervously , trying to be casual .

INT.  KINGSTON HOTEL COFFEE SHOP -- NIGHT
    CLOSE ON A STEAK DINNER set down in front of Crash . Nuke hands Crash a hundred dollar bill .
    NUKE
    This is from Tony for the rainout. C'mon, man, let's go to the party.
    CRASH
    Naw.
    NUKE
    `` Naw''? There's ice skaters coming! You ever made love to an ice skater?
    CRASH
    By the dozen. Holiday on Ice, Ice Capades, Ice Follies -.
    ( beat . )
    I'm through with one night stands.
    NUKE
    You're through with one night stands?! What do you want?
    CRASH
    I just wanta play everyday despite small nagging injuries - and go home to a woman who appreciates how full of crap I truly am.
    Nuke just stares at him .
    NUKE
    You're weird, man - I want a ice skater real bad.
    CRASH
    Go for it.
    NUKE
    If I get laid, you wo n't tell Annie?
    CRASH
    I wo n't have to.
    NUKE LOOKS AT HIM STRANGELY - And hurries to the party .

INT.  THE PARTY ROOM -- NIGHT
    THE GUYS ARE GROOMING TO EXCESS - Still blow drying and preening for each other . A knock at the door . THEY QUICKLY GET `` CASUAL '' and lounge seductively .
    DEKE
    It's them, it's them! Be casual.
    ( calling out . )
    Come in!
    THE DOOR OPENS - It 's Nuke .
    NUKE
    Hey, guys, pa - rty!
    TOMMY
    Shut up and be cool, man. Like Mickey there.
    MICKEY `` LOUNGES '' WITH A DRINK and a cigaret .
    MICKEY
    You wanta make it to the Show, Rock, you got ta learn how to `` lounge''.
    NUKE LEANS ON THE BAR with an elbow , striking his version of a `` lounging '' pose .
    NUKE
    How's this?
    MICKEY
    You got it.
    A knock at the door .
    TOMMY
    Entre.
    EIGHT ICE SKATERS STAND IN THE DOORWAY - Ready to .
    ICE SKATER #1
    Pa - rty!
    POP THE CORK ON THE SEVEN DOLLAR CHAMPAGNE - And party .

INT.  ANNIE'S HOUSE -- NIGHT
    THE WIVES AND SOME GIRLFRIENDS WATCH `` DYNASTY '' on Annie 's television . Annie hosts , filling their drink glasses , serving popcorn , and largely staying in the background .
    MICKEY'S WIFE
    Do you think your husband plays around on the road trips?
    DEKE'S WIFE
    No way. Well. God. do we have to talk about that?
    MICKEY'S WIFE
    I guess not. it's just that once I asked Mickey if he was faithful to me on the road trips and he said `` in his heart he was faithful''.
    ( beat . )
    What the hell does that mean?
    DEKE'S WIFE
    It means he's unfaithful - but only a man would put it in those words.
    A BABY CRIES - Tommy 's Wife lifts a baby from the couch , begins rocking It .

INT.  THE PLAYERS' HOTEL -- NIGHT
    Players are dancing , drinking , hustling the ice skaters , the music is up , the party swinging , when : SKIP ENTERS - He 's steaming and slightly drunk . Larry is with him .
    SKIP
    I just got one word to say to everybody - shut up!
    THE PLAYERS AND ICE SKATERS freeze in mid - party .
    SKIP
    ( CONT 'D . )
    Nuke - get everybody in here. Hundred dollar fine anybody's not here in five.
    NUKE HURRIES OUT THE DOOR

INT.  HOTEL HALLWAY -- CONTINUOUS
    NUKE POUNDS ON DOORS in a hurry . - P.O.V. . IN FIRST DOOR - Jimmy is on his knees at the bed , bare chested , praying with an open Bible .
    NUKE
    Get your holy ass in Room 401.
    He hustles to the next door , and pounds madly . - P.O.V. . IN SECOND DOOR - TWO NAKED WOMEN with Jose and Tony , nearly nude .
    NUKE
    Hundred dollar fine if you're not in # 401 in five.
    JOSE
    Hundred dollars?!
    JOSE AND TONY LOOK AT THE TWO WOMEN - It 's a lot of money in Class AAA ball .
    TONY
    Christ. Sorry ladies.
    JOSE AND TONY HURRY OUT in their shorts .
    NAKED LADY
    Go to hell! You're in last place anyway!
    AND NUKE HURRIES DOWN THE HALL - Pounding on each door .

INT.  COFFEE SHOP -- CONTINUOUS
    CRASH EATING ALONE - Peacefully . Nuke arrives excitedly .
    NUKE
    Crash! Skip wants everybody in # 401 for a team meeting. Hundred buck fine if ya do n't show!
    CRASH PULLS OUT THE HUNDRED DOLLAR BILL and hands it to him .
    CRASH
    Party without me.
    NUKE
    God - what a Big League move.
    NUKE TAKES THE MONEY and hurries back .

INT.  THE PARTY ROOM CONTINUOUS
    24 PLAYERS AND 8 ICE SKATERS - Some of the players Nuke rounded up are partially dressed . Skip spots the women .
    SKIP
    Who are you?
    ICE SKATER #1
    We're ice skaters. Can we go now?
    SKIP
    No. I want you to hear my philosophy. It'll do you some good.
    ( beat . )
    Here It is. This is a simple game. You throw the ball, you hit the ball, you catch the ball. You got that?!
    ICE SKATER #1
    ( frightened . )
    Yes.
    SKIP
    Are you lovely creatures aware that you are about to compromise yourselves with a buncha bums who are -.
    ( to Larry . )
    - what are we?
    LARRY
    Eight and twenty - four.
    SKIP
    Eight and twenty - four! How'd we ever win 8 games?
    LARRY
    It's a miracle.
    SKIP
    Look, guys - I'm a man, I got needs too. I understand this party - but.
    ( beat . )
    sex is the one thing you can get further behind in and catch up faster than anything I know.
    ( beat . )
    There's a baseball lesson in there somewhere.
    ( looking around . )
    Where's Crash?
    NUKE STEPS FORWARD - Hands Skip the hundred dollar bill .
    NUKE
    He ca n't make it. Here's his fine.
    SKIP
    Aw Christ, he do n't have to come. He's hitting.350.
    TOMMY
    Do n't you think that's a double standard - we're here and he ai n't?
    SKIP
    I believe in a double standard for guys hitting.350.
    ( beat . )
    Look, men - you got a choice. You wanta be roasting your nuts off for Midas Muffler welding exhaust pipes up the assholes of Cadillacs. or -.
    ( beat . )
    You wanta be sitting in the Caddy while some other guy's crawling around in a monkey suit with a blow torch?
    ( beat . )
    There's only two places you can be in life - in the Caddy or under it.
    ( nearly pleading . )
    These are the best years of your lives. These are the glamor days.
    ( beat . )
    It do n't got any better than this.
    ( threatening , tough . )
    But. if this club do n't start winning soon, there's gon na be changes made!

INT.  ANNIE'S HOUSE SIMULTANEOUS -- NIGHT
    CLOSE ON TELEVISION - `` DYNASTY '' drones on .
    DEKE'S WIFE
    ( wistfully . )
    Deke was a great player in high school. I thought held go right to the Major Leagues - I was gon na be a Big League wife.
    ( beat . )
    Pass the Pampers, please.
    CRASH
    Helluva guy -
    Silence . Crash flips off the T.V. with the remote .
    NUKE
    Can I ask you something?
    CRASH
    What?
    NUKE
    What would you think of a pitcher who wore women's panties?
    CRASH
    If he had a good breaking ball, I'd respect the shit outta him.
    Crash turns off the light . CLOSE ON NUKE - A bit of light spill on his face . Eyes open . A long ways from sleep .

EXT.  A CAROLINA LEAGUE BALLPARK -- NIGHT
    CLOSE ON NUKE 'S FACE - He takes his cap off , wipes his brow . He 's pitching . Everything in SLO - MO. . FANS IN THE BALLPARK LAUGH at Nuke , mocking his . EXTREME CLOSE UP ON NUKE 'S EYES - Frightened . SLOW FULLBACK ON NUKE - HE 'S STARK NAKED save for his cap and glove . Everyone else is clothed . NUKE WINDS AND PITCHES in the nude . SLO - MO . and as the batter cranks up to take a vicious swing -

INT.  TEAM BUS -- DAWN
    CLOSE ON NUKE 'S FACE - He awakes with a start .
    NUKE
    No!
    CRASH LEANS OVER and shakes him .
    CRASH
    Wake up, it's okay. you're dreaming.
    CRASH HELPS NUKE back to consciousness . Nuke shakes his head , trying to wake up . Crash Is almost tender .
    NUKE
    I was playing naked.
    CRASH
    I know, I know - I have that dream all the time. We're almost home.
    The Bus continues across the Carolina landscape .

EXT.  THE STADIUM PARKING LOT -- DAWN
    The team bus pulls into a deserted parking lot . A few of the players ' cars are parked . Some of the wives and girlfriends . And Annie . THE PLAYERS SHUFFLE OFF the bus . Tired and beat . CLOSE ON NUKE - He looks worse than the rest . He sees Annie and waves . She 's waiting next to her old Volvo .

EXT.  STREETS OF DURHAM MOMENTS LATER
    ANNIE 'S VOLVO PULLS OUT - She drives .

INT.  THE VOLVO -- DAY
    Annie is up - Nuke is down .
    NUKE
    God I'm tired. What a trip I was lousy. I was worse than lousy. Everytime I pitched - it was like throwing gasoline on a fire. Kaboom. I -
    ANNIE
    What is this `` I, I, I'' stuff? You only talk about yourself? Are n't you glad to see me? Do n't I look nice?
    NUKE
    Sorry. You look great. I'm totally exhausted.
    ANNIE
    Good. Total exhaustion can be spiritually fabulous.
    ( beat . )
    Let's play catch.
    NUKE
    Catch?

EXT.  ANNIE'S BACKYARD -- MORNING
    Flowers and birdfeeders everywhere . And , 60 feet away in complete , oversized catcher 's gear - JACKSON IN A CATCHER 'S CROUCH - Nuke stares , in his street clothes , but now with a glove and ball .
    JACKSON
    Hum, babe, hum, babe, fire it in here, hum babe -
    ANNIE
    That's not necessary, Jackson -.
    ( beat . )
    Okay, Nuke, now lean in for the sign.
    He does . Jackson flashes some ridiculous signs .
    NUKE
    This in ridiculous. I'm a pro.
    ANNIE
    Just do what I say. Now, which nostril are you breathing through?
    NUKE
    Which nostril am I breathing through?
    Annie puts her hand under his nose .
    ANNIE
    The right nostril. Good.
    NUKE
    My right nostril?
    ANNIE
    There are two important psychic conduits called the `` pingala'' and the `` ida''. The pingala starts with the left testicle.
    ( or left ovary of the female . )
    and ends at the right nostril.
    She touches his left nut through his pants in a matter of fact manner . He stares back .
    ANNIE
    The ida originates at the right testicle -LRB- or ovary. -RRB- and terminates at the left nostril.
    NUKE
    I'm really beat. I need some serious `` z's'' -
    ANNIE
    The pingala is the nostril used for throwing a baseball.
    ( beat . )
    And if you discover before a game you're in the wrong nostril, it's easy to switch.
    NUKE
    Switch nostrils?
    ANNIE
    Right. Okay, fire a couple in there.
    NUKE TOSSES AN EASY PITCH to Jackson . Annie 's incensed .
    ANNIE
    You're patronizing me! I will not be patronized -
    NUKE
    If I throw too hard I'll hurt the kid.
    ANNIE
    He's handled a lotta pitchers whose records were better than one and six.
    Nuke gets a little steamed . He feels his nostril , winds , and fires a medium speed fastball to Jackson .
    NUKE
    ( a bit angry . )
    How was that?
    ANNIE
    A little better.
    NUKE
    Gim me the God damn ball!
    NUKE WINDS UP and fires a pitch to Jackson . Alas - THE BALL SAILS THROUGH A WINDOW - Crashing glass .
    NUKE
    ( cynically . )
    How ya like that?
    ANNIE
    Much better. Your delivery was fully integrated because you were n't thinking about it'cause you were pissed off at me.
    ( beat . )
    This is progress.
    Nuke smiles and gives in . And reaches for her .
    NUKE
    I give up. Let's go inside, make love, and fall asleep till it's time to go to the ballpark.
    She takes his hand and leads him up to the back porch .
    ANNIE
    Or.
    ( taking his hand . )
    . We could just take that sexual energy and save it for a few hours and re - channel it into your pitching tonight.
    ( shouting . )
    C'mon, Jackson, I've got some lemonade!
    Jackson runs over in full gear to join them . SITTING ON THE BACK PORCH - A pitcher of lemonade .
    NUKE
    I ca n't keep up with you. First you say sex is gon na make me a better pitcher - now no sex is gon na do it?!
    ANNIE
    It's all the same thing.
    SUDDENLY NUKE 'S FACE IS FILLED WITH ALARM - He points .
    NUKE
    What's that?!
    - P.O.V. . A CARDBOARD BOX ON A TABLE NEARBY - Scrawled in larged letters on the side are the words `` MAX PATKIN '' .
    ANNIE
    ( matter of factly . )
    That's Max. His ashes anyway. He left no kin.
    Nuke stares , unsettled .
    NUKE
    God. I think I'm gon na be sick -
    ANNIE
    Oh do n't be silly. Death is nothing to be scared of. It's just another way of living. It's just a fresh start - kinda like spring training.
    Nuke thinks about this carefully . Looks at the ashes , at Annie , and at Jackson , in full gear , mask on his head .
    NUKE
    Death is like spring training?
    ANNIE
    Yes. And so is birth. Now look me in the eyes, Nuke -.
    ( sweetly accusing him . )
    You have n't been wearing my panties, have you?
    CLOSE ON NUKE - Utterly bewildered .

INT.  BULLS LOCKER ROOM -- NIGHT
    NUKE PULLS HIS JOCKSTRAP ON over the red panties . Crash notices the panties , and snaps the waistband .
    CRASH
    Hot. Very hot.
    Nuke looks around nervously , continues dressing quickly .
    NUKE
    Annie says her panties will keep one side of my brain occupied while I'm on the mound, thus keeping my brain slightly off center, which is where it should be for artists and pitchers. She also said I should throw whatever pitches you call for.
    CRASH
    Annie's a smart lady.
    Suddenly Deke spots Nuke 's panties .
    DEKE
    Hey, fruit alert! Check out the Rook.
    SEVERAL PLAYERS GATHER AROUND - Wolf whistles aimed at Nuke as the players are dressing into their uniforms .
    NUKE
    Annie says there's no such thing as straight and gay. We're all sexual creatures to start with, and we get formed into certain roles.
    TOMMY
    You believe that?
    NUKE
    When I'm one and six I'll believe anything.
    ( as they dress . )
    Annie also says that God is a woman. You believe that, Crash, you think God's a lady?
    CRASH
    God's definitely a woman - but she's no lady.
    TOMMY
    This is all Commie bullshit.
    ( beat . )
    God has a dick, man.
    TONY
    God damn it, Jimmy, you're an expert - does God have a dick or a pussy?
    JIMMY TURNS FROM HIS CUBICLE to answer the theological question . All heads wait for the answer .
    JIMMY
    The Lord God is tri - une - Father, Son, and Holy Ghost.
    TOMMY
    Father and Son. Awright!
    The guys slap fives , convinced God is a man .
    MICKEY,
    ( baiting them . )
    Yeah, but He is a brother.
    TOMMY
    Bullshit! God ai n't no brother!
    Deke turns to Crash , full of despair .
    DEKE
    If there is a God, why am I hitting.200?
    SUDDENLY SKIP AND LARRY APPEAR to restore order .
    SKIP
    Shut up! This is a damn noisy clubhouse for a team that's lost 15 straight.
    Silence . Skip takes off his cap - instantly sincere .
    SKIP
    Patkin was a tribute to baseball.
    LARRY
    and one helluva guy.

EXT.  DURHAM BALLPARK -- DUSK
    A BLACK GOSPEL GROUP at a mike at home plate , singing :
    GOSPEL SINGER
    ( SINGING . )
    I come to the garden alone, When the dew is still on the roses, And the voice I hear, whispering in my ear,. The Son of God discloses -
    ANNIE SPRINKLES MAX 'S ASHES on the pitcher 's mound , as : JACKSON SITS IN THE DUGOUT FILLING ROSIN BAGS with the extra ashes from a box . EXTREME CLOSE UP - A ROSIN BAG MARKED `` MAX '' EXTREME CLOSE UP - `` MAX '' ROSIN BAG on the mound .

EXT.  DURHAM BALLPARK -- GAME IN PROGRESS -- NIGHT
    NUKE ON THE MOUND - PICKS UP the rosin bag , and paces . A small crowd . A batter steps in to hit . Nuke looks . in for the sign .
    NUKE
    ( VOICE OVER . )
    God, these panties feel great. That do n't make me queer, right? Right. Whoo.
    ( reads the sign . )
    Breaking ball.
    NUKE WINDS AND DELIVERS - Breaking ball for a strike .
    NUKE
    I ai n't queer. I know I ai n't.
    ( reads the sign . )
    Fastball.
    NUKE WINDS AND DELIVERS - Fastball for a strike . ANNIE 'S BOX SEAT IN THE STANDS - She charts pitches .
    JACKSON
    Ninety - three miles an hour.
    ANNIE
    He looks wonderful, Jackson.
    NUKE ON THE MOUND - He looks in for the sign .
    NUKE
    Fastball again? Why's he want the heat - I just threw heat. Do n't think, Meat - give'em the gas.
    NUKE WINDS AND DELIVERS - An eye - popping fastball . The batter swings and misses . Strike three . IN THE DUGOUT - SKIP AND LARRY LOOK AT EACH other warily .
    SKIP
    Jesus - what's got into Nuke?
    LARRY
    I heard he's wearing women's underwear - and he's breathing through his pingala nostril.
    SKIP
    ( spitting tobacco . )
    I'm getting too old for this game.
    P.O.V. NUKES FASTBALL SHATTERS A BAT - THE HITTER hits a weak roller to third for the second out . BACK TO THE MOUND - Nuke is pumped up . Paces .
    NUKE
    ( VOICE OVER . )
    God, Annie's got a great ass. How come her panties fit me? That's one of the mysteries of sex I guess.
    NUKE WINDS AND DELIVERS A VICIOUS CURVEBALL - A check swing dribbler to first for the third out . And the players run into the dugout .

INT.  THE DUGOUT
    NUKE PUTS ON HIS WARM UP JACKET and sits down next to Crash , who 's taking off his gear , readying to hit .
    NUKE
    I was great, eh?
    CRASH
    Your fastball was up and your curveball was hanging - in the Show they woulda ripped you.
    NUKE
    Ca n't you let me enjoy the moment?
    CRASH
    The moment's over.
    ( rising to get a bat . )
    If this guy starts me off with a breaking ball, I'm going downtown -
    CRASH SMILES in his disarming way , and grabs a bat .

EXT.  THE ON DECK CIRCLE
    Crash kneels , rubbing the bat handle with pine tar . He studies the pitcher working the first two hitters . CRASH RISES and heads to the plate . CRASH STEPS INTO THE BOX - Digs in .
    CRASH
    ( VOICE OVER . )
    I dare you to throw me the hammer - you ai n't that stupid.
    CRASH 'S P.O.V. . IN SLOW - MOTION - The pitcher winds and delivers . And as the ball leaves the pitcher 's hand -
    CRASH
    ( VOICE OVER . )
    Breaking ball - you fool!
    CRASH UNLOADS ON THE PITCH - Crushing a home run deep over the left field wall .

INT.  THE PRESS BOX
    TEDDY THE RADIO ANNOUNCER is wary about these events .
    TEDDY THE RADIO MAN
    Two - nothing Bulls in the second - first time the Bulls have been ahead in weeks, eh Whitey -.
    ( beat . )
    Let's see if the real Nuke LaLoosh will show up -
    NUKE FIRES THREE QUICK PITCHES for another strike out . Curve ball , fast ball , curve ball . Overpowering . ANNIE AND JACKSON in her box seat .
    ANNIE
    Oh my.
    SKIP AND LARRY IN THE DUGOUT - Skip looks at Larry as if to say `` What 's happening ? '' Larry just shrugs . BACK TO THE FIELD - Nuke 's next pitch . THE NEXT BATTER POPS UP - Crash circles into foul ground to make the catch , whipping the ball around the infield . AND CRASH GOES TO THE MOUND for a visit .
    NUKE
    Hey, I'm cruisin', man - what're you doing out here?!
    CRASH
    I want you to throw this one at the bat rack.
    NUKE
    Why?! I'm finally throwin' the damn thing where I want to.
    CRASH
    It'll keep the fear of God in the hitters. Trust me.
    NUKE
    You're the boss.
    CRASH RETURNS TO THE PLATE - Flashes a sign . THE PRESS BOX Teddy 's getting worked up .
    TEDDY THE RADIO MAN
    - a staggering start by LaLoosh - he's thrown 5 cuts on 9 pitches, all of them strikes - he's got pin point control here tonight, Bull fans. here's the pitch -
    NUKE 'S NEXT DELIVERY - A wild ass rocket thirty feet off line . The BULL MASCOT DIVES for cover . THE BATTER STEPS OUT OF THE BOX nervously , muttering .
    BATTER
    This guy's crazy.
    CRASH
    Yep. Next one might be at your head. Hell if I know where the damn thing's going.
    CLOSE ON NUKE - Smiles . Winds . Delivers . A change up . THE BATTER SWINGS TERRIBLY OFF STRIDE - Strike three . Crash whips the ball around the infield . SCOREBOARD : DURHAM 11 , KINGSTON 0 - TOP OF THE NINTH
    TEDDY THE RADIO MAN
    - top of the ninth, two outs, one out away from a stunning two hit shutout for LaLoosh.
    NUKE ON THE MOUND - Bearing down .
    NUKE
    ( VOICE OVER . )
    Bear down, Meat, do n't let up. You own these guys. Dad'll love a shutout.
    P.O.V. CRASH FLASHES THE SIGN - Nuke does n't like it .
    NUKE
    No, no - this guy's looking for heat - lem me give him the deuce -
    NUKE SHAKES OFF THE SIGN Cocky , full of himself . ANNIE AND JACKSON in her box seat .
    ANNIE
    Oh no - he's shaking off the sign, Jackson. Big mistake.
    JACKSON
    He'll learn.
    CLOSE ON CRASH BEHIND THE PLATE
    CRASH
    This son of a bitch is throwing a two hit shutout and he's shaking me off?!
    ( to batter and umpire . )
    Hey Charlie, here comes the deuce.
    NUKE WINDS AND DELIVERS - A hanging curveball . The batter takes an ungodly cut , and BLASTS a long home . THE BATTER STANDS AT THE PLATE watching the blast . until CRASH SHOVES HIM toward first with a sneer . For a moment it looks like there 'll be a fight - but the hitter backs off and takes the home run trot as : NUKE STARES AT THE OUTFIELD WALL as the batter circles the bases . Crash walks to the mound .
    NUKE
    You told him I was throwing a deuce, right?
    CRASH
    Yep. He really crushed that dinger, did n't he. Musta gone 450 feet. damn.
    NUKE HOLDS OUT HIS GLOVE - Says nothing . Crash puts a new ball in the glove . Returns to the plate . NUKE GETS THE SIGN - Winds . Delivers . Batter hits a weak one hopper back to the mound . Game 's over .

INT.  MAXWELL'S BAR -- LATER -- NIGHT
    A raucous celebration of the victory . Booze flows . And we begin hearing the familiar sounds of Piaf .

INT.  ANNIE'S HOUSE -- LATER -- NIGHT
    ANNIE COMES OUT OF THE BATHROOM - Dressed in a long , flowing nightgown , elegant and old fashioned . She looks fabulous , PRESENTING HERSELF to Nuke .
    ANNIE
    I'm yours.
    NUKE
    Y' know, Annie, I been thinking if it works for one game, maybe it'll work for a whole buncha games.
    ANNIE
    Breathing through your pingala always works, honey -
    NUKE
    Not that. I mean the re - channeling of my sexual energy.
    ( beat . )
    Maybe we should n't make love for awhile.
    ANNIE
    Now do n't go overboard, I look incredibly hot, right?
    She strikes a pose . She does look hot .
    NUKE
    You know what it feels like to throw a three hitter?
    ( nervously , with resolve . )
    We better not fuck.
    ANNIE
    Nuke?!
    NUKE
    Just till I lose.
    ANNIE
    Get over here.
    NUKE
    No.
    ANNIE
    Ebby Calvin `` Nuke'' LaLoosh -
    She starts toward him - and Nuke flees . Out the door , into the night . Annie slumps in disbelief .

INT.  ANNIE'S BEDROOM -- NIGHT
    ANNIE SITS IN BED ALONE - Lights a cigaret . A puzzled expression - things have got out of control .
    ANNIE
    ( VOICE OVER CONT 'D . )
    Nuke was so encouraged that he took a vow to not have sex until they lost.
    Annie reaches over , opens a drawer in her nightstand , and pulls out her baseball glove . She cradles it fondly in her lap , puts it on , pounds it gently .
    ANNIE
    ( VOICE OVER CONT 'D . )
    Y ` see a ballplayer on a streak considers himself touched with magic and he'll do anything to keep from breaking the spell.

INT.  DURHAM BULL LOCKER ROOM -- DAY
    NUKE NEATLY UNFOLDS THE RED PANTIES in his locker .
    ANNIE
    ( VOICE OVER CONT 'D . )
    In fact the whole team started making religious connections and everybody got hot.
    JOSE BLESSES THE BATS with a chicken bone cross . JIMMY READS THE BIBLE and prays alone in the corner .

EXT.  DURHAM BASEBALL FIELD -- DAY
    PLAYERS TAKING GROUND BALLS and batting practice .
    ANNIE
    ( VOICE OVER CONT 'D . )
    I figured Nuke would win a couple, then lose, and things would get back to normal.
    PLAYERS PLAYING `` FLIP '' PEPPER like kids .
    ANNIE
    ( VOICE OVER CONT 'D . )
    But it did n't happen like that. and for one extraordinary June and July, the Durham Bulls, for whatever perverse reason, began playing baseball with joy and verve and poetry -
    NUKE WARMING UP in the bullpen , listening to Crash .
    ANNIE
    ( VOICE OVER CONT 'D . )
    The two sides of my own brain were all jumbled up and cross - wired. while one side was being neglected, the other was in paradise watching our Bulls play like Big Leaguers.
    MICKEY RIPS A TRIPLE UP THE ALLEY - Slides into third . DEKE AND TOMMY TURN A SPECTACULAR DOUBLE PLAY
    ANNIE
    ( VOICE OVER . )
    We swept a four game series with Kingston, back to back doubleheaders with Winston - Salem, and kicked the holy shit out of Greensboro in a three game series.
    SEVERAL PLAYERS SIGNING AUTOGRAPHS at a local mall . A line of kids to meet them . A banner - MEET YOUR BULLS !
    ANNIE
    ( VOICE OVER . )
    They were in demand all over town - and Crash, who kept hitting dingers, was approaching the minor league record. though I told nobody.
    CRASH BLASTS ANOTHER HOME RUN - Another win . JULY 4 PROMOTION - LARRY , DEKE , TOMMY , AND JOSE dressed as the `` Spirit of 176 Drum and Fife Corps '' at home plate , surrounded by a Boy Scout Troop .
    ANNIE
    ( VOICE OVER . )
    After sweeping a July 4 doubleheader, the Durham Bulls were tied for first.
    THE WIVES , THE GROUPIES , AND MILLIE WAIT for the players outside the clubhouse following a game . ANNIE SITS ALONE IN HER BOX SEAT as the stadium empties .
    ANNIE
    ( VOICE OVER . )
    But beautiful as the winning streak was, I was getting damn lonely.
    ( beat . )
    Something had to be done. I needed a man.

EXT.  THE TEAM BUS ON THE ROAD BACK --DAY
    The sounds of Diana Ross and the Supremes .

INT.  THE BUS -- DAY
    LARRY , DEKE , TOMMY AND MICKEY as the Supremes , singing `` Stop in the Name of Love '' at the front of the bus .
    NUKE
    I love winning, Crash, you hear me? I love It. Teach me everything.
    CRASH
    It's time you started working on your interviews.
    NUKE
    What do I got ta do?
    CRASH
    Learn your cliches. Study them. Know them. They're your friends.
    Crash hands Nuke a small pad and pen .
    CRASH
    Write this down.
    ( beat . )
    `` We got ta play'em one day at a time.''
    NUKE
    Boring.
    CRASH
    Of course. That's the point.
    ( beat . )
    `` I'm just happy to be here and hope I can help the ballclub.''
    NUKE
    Jesus.
    CRASH
    Write, write - `` I just wanta give It my best shot and, Good Lord willing, things'll work out.''
    NUKE STARTS WRITING them down .
    NUKE
    . Good Lord willing, things'll work out.''
    CRASH
    Yep. So how's Annie?
    Nuke looks up from his cliches , startled .
    NUKE
    She's getting steamed'cause I'm still re - channeling my sexual energy - maybe I should cave in and sleep with her once just to calm her down. What ` ya think?
    CRASH
    You outta your mind? If you give in now you might start losing.
    ( beat . )
    Never fuck with a winning streak.
    Nuke nods seriously , listening to the master .

EXT.  THE STADIUM PARKING LOT -- DAY
    THE BUS PULLS IN - Wives and girlfriends are waiting . The players get off , greet their women . ANNIE GREETS NUKE - They head for her Volvo . JIMMY STARTS ACROSS THE LOT on foot , dragging his luggage , when Millie pulls up in her car .
    MILLIE
    Hi, Jimmy. Want a ride?
    JIMMY
    ( nervously . )
    Have you accepted Jesus Christ as your personal savior?
    MILLIE
    No.
    JIMMY
    Can I give you my testimony?
    MILLIE
    You can do anything you want.
    ( a tiny grin . )
    Hop in.
    JIMMY NERVOUSLY GETS IN WITH MILLIE They roar away .

INT.  ANNIE'S KITCHEN -- DAY
    NUKE SITS AT THE TABLE - He 's just finished eating . Annie circles him . A pot of soup on the stove .
    ANNIE
    I'm so proud of you and all the guys. Want some more soup?
    NUKE
    No, no, it was great.
    ANNIE
    How ` bout a back rub?
    NUKE
    No, that's okay. All I need's a little nap.
    ANNIE
    I'll tuck you in.
    NUKE
    ( nervously . )
    You ca n't seduce me.
    ANNIE
    I'm not gon na try to seduce you, sweetie.
    ANNIE STRETCHES OUT HER LEG and lays it an the table .
    NUKE
    What's that?
    She pulls back her skirt slightly , exposing her garter snaps attached to her stockings .
    ANNIE
    That's my leg.
    NUKE
    I know what it is.
    ANNIE
    I figure we could work on some fundamentals even if we do n't make love.
    She strokes her leg . Nuke stares fearfully .
    NUKE
    Fundamentals?
    ANNIE
    Sure.
    ( beat . )
    Unsnap my stockings.
    Nuke squirms , then reaches for her garter snaps . And stops .
    NUKE
    Crash once called a woman's, uh - pussy - y' know how the hair kinda makes a `` V'' shape? -
    ANNIE
    Yes I do.
    NUKE
    Well - he calls it the Bermuda Triangle. He said a man can get lost in there and never be heard from again.
    ANNIE
    What a nasty thing to say.
    NUKE
    He did n't mean it nasty. He said that gettin' lost and disappearing from the face of the earth was sometimes a good thing to do - especially like that.
    ANNIE
    Oh.
    ( beat . )
    Crash is a very smart man. Now c'mon, honey, give it a try.
    NUKE REACHES FOR THE GARTER SNAPS with two hands . He fumbles , groping awkwardly . Annie stops him gently .
    ANNIE
    Watch. one hand -
    WITH A SINGLE HAND ANNIE FLICKS each snap . Flick , flick , flick . Magic . The snaps open effortlessly .
    NUKE
    oh.
    ANNIE RE - SNAPS THEM QUICKLY , offering her leg to Nuke .
    ANNIE
    Now you try.
    NUKE TRIES AGAIN - One handed . Awkwardly again , but -
    ANNIE
    ( sighing sexually . )
    Mmmmmmm. oh yes.
    BUT NUKE LEAPS TO HIS FEET - Reacting vigorously , nervously , desperately . The soup crashes on the floor .
    NUKE
    No! You're playing with my mind!
    ANNIE
    I'm trying to play with your body!
    NUKE
    I knew it - you're seducing me!
    ANNIE
    Of course I'm seducing you for Godsakes, and I'm doing a damn poor job of it -.
    ( beat . )
    Are n't I pretty?
    NUKE
    I think you're real cute.
    ANNIE
    Cute?! I hate cute! Baby ducks are cute! I wanta be exotic and mysterious!
    NUKE
    You're exotic and mysterious and cute - that's why I better leave.
    Nuke starts to leave .
    ANNIE
    Nuke! You got things all wrong! There's no relation between sex and baseball. Ask Crash.
    NUKE
    I did.
    ANNIE
    What'd he say?
    NUKE
    He said if I gave in to you I'd start losing again.
    ANNIE
    He did?
    NUKE
    I'll be back when we lose.
    NUKE HURRIES OUT THE DOOR - Annie just stares .

EXT.  THE DOWNTOWNER MOTEL -- DURHAM -- DAY
    A run of the mill cheap modern motel .

INT.  CRASH'S ROOM AT THE MOTEL -- DAY
    CRASH WORKS ON HIS SWING in front of a mirror . A knock at the door .
    CRASH
    Come in.
    ANNIE ENTERS the room . Crash stays with his stance .
    ANNIE
    Crash. I want you.
    CRASH
    Nuke wo n't go to bed with you, eh?
    ANNIE
    He' s confused -
    CRASH
    Are n't we all?
    ANNIE
    Do n't you think I'm pretty?
    Crash puts down the bat , and looks directly at her . As he does he picks up two spring loaded hand exercisers and begins pumping them an he talks .
    CRASH
    You're gorgeous, God damn it! From the moment I first saw you I knew I had to have you. I had to have you!
    ANNIE
    I want to be had.
    CRASH
    I think of you and the `` boy'' all the time.
    ANNIE
    He wo n't make love to me anymore.
    CRASH
    And he's right! A ballplayer on a streak has to respect the streak. They do n't happen very often.
    ( beat . )
    You know how hard this game is? If you believe you're playing well because you're getting laid or because you're not getting laid or because you wore red silk panties - then you are!
    ( beat . )
    And I still think Thomas Pynchon is full of shit.
    ANNIE
    I want you desperately!
    Crash can hardly keep up . So he slows her down -
    CRASH
    Who are you? Do you have a job?
    ANNIE
    I teach part time at the Junior College. What if I told you I was through with Nuke? He learned his lessons quickly and left me.
    CRASH
    And now you wanta teach me?
    ANNIE
    I do n't imagine there's much I could teach you.
    CRASH
    I doubt that.
    ANNIE
    Crash, I get wet just thinking about you.
    CRASH
    I thought you wanted an `` uncomplicated'' boy?
    ANNIE
    I'm ready for a complicated man.
    CRASH
    - and as soon as we lose a game, he'll be back in your arms.
    ANNIE
    I said when I think about you, I get wet.
    CRASH
    Annie, I think you should leave.
    Annie launches into a tirade without orchestration or self - awareness . She 's frustrated , confused , angry and .
    ANNIE
    God damn you - what is happening? Is there no man who'll have me?
    ( beat . )
    This is the weirdest season I ever saw - the Durham Bulls ca n't lose and I ca n't get laid!
    CRASH
    ( softly . )
    You okay?
    Annie slides against the wall down to the floor . Tears flow . Her makeup runs . Her eyes are red .
    ANNIE
    ( shakily . )
    I need a drink.
    Crash gingerly helps her to her feet .

INT.  MAXWELL'S BAR -- DAY
    ANNIE AND CRASH SIT IN THE CORNER of the empty bar .
    CRASH
    Why baseball?
    ANNIE
    ( sighs . )
    I was raised in a Baptist church got dipped in the water when I was 5 - born again before kindergarten. by the time I was 10 I knew it was bullshit and at 15 I ran away from home.
    SHE SMILES at the most painful memories .
    ANNIE
    pregnant, had an abortion, got pregnant again, had an abortion again. gave up men. Tried women. Missed men. My mother died.
    ( beat . )
    I bought a car for $ 200 and drove to Ft. Lauderdale to bury her.
    ( beat . )
    And after we'd sung some hymns in some wretched Florida funeral home, I went outside and something happened -
    Her tone becomes wistful , nostalgic .
    ANNIE
    The smell of cut grass in the warm March air overwhelmed me and I heard a noise -.
    ( makes the sound . )
    . -RRB- - tok, tok, tok - and some men shouting. then tok, tok, tok.
    Crash smiles slightly . He knows .
    ANNIE
    I crossed the street - it was the New York Yankees spring training field - tok, tok, tok, was the sound of a ball hitting a bat - and I sat in the warm bleachers to think about my mother.
    ( beat . )
    And I saw him.
    CRASH
    Who?
    ANNIE
    Thurman Munson.
    ( beat . )
    He was covered with dirt and he was fighting with everybody - it was beautiful.
    ( beat . )
    And he called the ump a cocksucker and got thrown out of the game even though it was an exhibition!
    ( beat . )
    So I stayed in the bleachers all spring and gradually came to understand what's so great about baseball.
    CRASH
    What's so great about baseball?
    ANNIE
    If you know where home plate is, then you know where 1st base is, and 2nd, and everything else -'cause they're always in the same place in relation to home.
    ( beat . )
    Do n't you see? If you know where home plate is, then you know where everything else in the universe is!
    Silence .
    CRASH
    I do n't know if I'd go that far.
    ANNIE
    It's true, It's true!
    ( beat , down . )
    Least it used to be true. It ai n't possible that baseball's not enough anymore, is it, Crash?
    CRASH
    It's possible.
    ANNIE
    No.
    CRASH
    Are you gon na be waking up next to 20 year old ballplayers when you're 60?
    ANNIE
    Well. I used to think that was n't the worst thing in the world to look forward to. Lately I'm not so sure.
    CRASH
    Why not?
    ANNIE
    ( angrily . )
    Whatta you mean `` why not''? Are you gon na play forever?!
    Before Crash can answer - SUDDENLY A VOICE interrupts . They both turn to see : MILLIE EXCITEDLY DRAGGING JIMMY into the nearly empty bar . She leads him by the hand .
    MILLIE
    Annie, Annie! There she is - we've been looking all over for ya. Hi Crash.
    MILLIE LEADS JIMMY right up to their table . And as they hold hands . Jimmy stands there shyly .
    MILLIE
    Well tell'em, honey.
    JIMMY
    ( nervously . )
    We're getting married.
    MILLIE STICKS OUT HER LEFT HAND Displays a huge ring .
    ANNIE
    Omigawd, honey, I'm so happy for you.
    MILLIE
    He's a virgin.
    Jimmy squirms defensively .
    JIMMY
    Wellyeah.
    ( to Annie and Crash . )
    I guess that probably seems pretty corny to people like you.
    ANNIE
    Oh Jimmy, honey, I think it sounds wonderful!
    MILLIE
    Annie, will you be the bride's maid?

EXT.  DURHAM STADIUM -- LATER -- NIGHT
    GAME IN PROGRESS - Nuke on the mound . NUKE WINDS AND DELIVERS - Very high . Ball three . INSIDE THE DUGOUT - Skip and Larry spitting tobacco .
    SKIP
    Nuke's overthrowing tonight, he do n't look loose. Anything bothering him?
    LARRY
    He said his chakras were jammed and he was breathing out of the wrong nostril.
    SKIP
    ( spitting tobacco . )
    Okay.
    BACK TO THE MOUND NUKE WINDS AND DELIVERS AGAIN - Very high . Ball four . CRASH IS QUICKLY to the mound .
    CRASH
    What's wrong?
    NUKE
    I'm nervous - my old man's here.
    NUKE MOTIONS - They both look . - P.O.V. NUKE 'S FATHER SITTING in a special box seat . The man is 45 , and is operating a home video camera taking pictures of his son .
    CRASH
    Hey, he's just your father, man - he's as full of shit as anybody.
    TOMMY AND DEKE JOIN THEM at the mound .
    DEKE
    What the hell's going on?
    TOMMY
    You breathing through the wrong fucking nostril again?
    DEKE
    Hey, you guys hear Jimmy and Millie are engaged?! Wait'll I tell him she's gone down on half the Carolina League -
    CRASH
    ( threatening . )
    Anybody says anything bad about Millie, I'll break his neck.
    NUKE
    Hey, guys, I got a game to pitch.
    JOSE THE FIRST BASEMAN JOINS THEM ALL at the mound .
    JOSE
    Do n't throw anything to me - my girlfriend put a curse on my glove.
    NUKE
    I'll take the curse off the son of a bitch!
    JOSE
    Then you got to cut the head off a live rooster.
    NUKE
    Shit.
    MICKEY JOINS THE CROWD from third base .
    MICKEY
    Do n't worry, man, this umpire's a God damn racist.
    P.O.V. . THE UMPIRE - He 's black . THE DUGOUT - SKIP AND LARRY watch the growing meeting .
    SKIP
    What the hell's going on out there?
    LARRY
    It's a damn convention.
    SKIP
    Check it out.
    THE MOUND - Larry joins the convention .
    LARRY
    What the hell's going on out here?
    CRASH
    Nuke's scared cause his nostrils are jammed and his old man's here, we need a live rooster to take the curse off Jose's glove, and nobody knows what to get Jimmy and Millie for their wedding present - there's a whole lotta shit we're trying to deal with -
    LARRY
    Oh. I thought there was a problem.

INT.  ANNIE'S HOUSE NIGHT
    ANNIE IS HELPING MILLIE make her WEDDING DRESS . The game can be heard on the radio in the b.g.
    MILLIE
    You should be at the game.
    ANNIE
    No, no - I'm fine. Millie, how much time did you and Jimmy spend together before he proposed?
    Annie holds the dress up to Millie .
    MILLIE
    Five hours. We both just know.
    ( studying the dress . )
    Do you think I deserve to wear white?
    ANNIE
    We all deserve to wear white.
    BOTH WOMEN TURN THEIR HEADS to the radio to listen .
    TEDDY THE RADIO MAN
    line drive up the alley's gon na score at least two, here comes the relay -

EXT.  DURHAM BALLPARK THE GAME NIGHT
    CRASH FLIPS HIS MASK - A runner rounds third heading for home . Here comes the throw , on a line . It hits once on the infield grass , takes a long hop - AS THE RUNNER BARRELS TOWARD THE PLATE - Crash takes the throw . THE RUNNER SLIDES - Crash blocks the plate . A cloud of dust . A close play . THE UMPIRE SIGNALS `` SAFE '' - And Crash flips out . In a second he is nose to nose with the UMPIRE .
    CRASH
    I got him on the knee!
    UMPIRE
    You missed him!
    CRASH
    God damn It, Jack, he still ai n't touched the plate.
    THEIR FACES ARE INCHES APART - Screaming face to face .
    UMPIRE
    Do n't bump me.
    CRASH
    It was a cocksucking call!
    UMPIRE
    Did you call me a cocksucker?
    CRASH
    No! I said It was a cock - sucking call and you ca n't run me for that!
    UMPIRE
    You missed the tag!
    CRASH
    You spit on me!
    UMPIRE
    I did n't spit on you!
    CRASH
    You're in the wrong business, Jack - you're Sears - Roebuck material!
    UMPIRE
    You're close, Crash, you want me to run you? I'll run you!
    CRASH
    You want me to call you a cocksucker?!
    UMPIRE
    Try it! Go ahead. Call me a cocksucker!
    CRASH
    Beg me!
    UMPIRE
    Call me a cocksucker and you're outta here!
    CRASH
    Beg me again!
    UMPIRE
    Call me a cocksucker and you're outta here!
    CRASH
    You're a cocksucker!
    UMPIRE
    You're outta here!
    THE UMP THEATRICALLY THROWS CRASH out of the game .

INT.  ANNIE'S HOUSE -- SIMULTANEOUS
    ANNIE AND MILLIE STARE at the radio .
    TEDDY ON THE RADIO
    I've never seen Crash so angry and frankly, Bull fans, he used a certain word that's a `` no - no'' with umpires.
    MILLIE
    Crash musta called the guy a cocksucker
    ANNIE
    God, he's so romantic.

INT.  THE SHOWERS NIGHT
    CRASH STANDS AGAINST the water , letting it stream across him . He raises a can of beer to his lips , drinks it slowly in the shower . As the water runs over Crash .
    ANNIE
    ( VOICE OVER . )
    When Crash got throwed out, the game got out of hand.
    ( beat . )
    . Jose made three errors with his cursed mitt.
    JOSE BOOTS A GROUND BALL - A runner scores .
    ANNIE
    ( VOICE OVER . )
    Nuke never quite got in the groove though he did n't pitch bad.
    NUKE JUST MISSES WITH A PITCH - Ball four .
    ANNIE
    ( VOICE OVER . )
    and the winning streak came to an end with a 3 - 2 loss.
    ( beat . )
    The good news was that a man was about to come calling. the bad news was - it was the wrong guy.

INT.  ANNIE'S LIVING ROOM NIGHT
    AS PIAF PLAYS on the stereo - A knock at the door . ANNIE GOES TO THE DOOR - Then refuses to answer it at first . She hides in a corner . Bites her fist .
    NUKE'S VOICE
    Annie! You got ta be in there - I can hear that crazy Mexican singer!
    Annie smiles slightly , and opens the door .
    NUKE
    We lost.
    ANNIE
    it's okay.
    She opens the door fully . Nuke 's father stands there .
    NUKE
    I'd like you to meet my father.
    ANNIE
    ( surprised . )
    Oh - wo n't YOU come in?

INT.  ANNIE'S HOUSE
    AS THEY ENTER - She leads them into the kitchen .
    NUKE'S FATHER
    Ebby's told me a lot about you.
    ANNIE
    Uh oh.
    ( beat . )
    Can I offer you some coffee?
    THE KITCHEN - CONTINUOUS - NIGHT She puts a pot of water with a swirl of graciousness .
    NUKE'S FATHER
    Yeah. Ebby tells me you're a very spiritual woman. He tells me you've taught him a lot about discipline and self - control.
    Annie and Nuke exchange glances . Nuke smiles .
    ANNIE
    He's a good student.
    NUKE'S FATHER
    We were worried that Ebby might get involved with the wrong crowd in professional baseball - we're so pleased, he met a Christian woman.
    ANNIE
    Praise the Lord, eh?
    The Piaf record begins skipping in the next room .
    ANNIE
    Oh my - I better fix that. Ebby will you help me? I'm no good with mechanical things
    Nuke picks up his cue and follows her to : THE LIVING ROOM - CONTINUOUS - NIGHT Annie fixes the record .
    NUKE
    I could n't dump my old man but maybe later I can sneak away from him.
    ANNIE
    You do n't have to.
    NUKE
    I'm starting to understand what you're teaching me. I mean the panties and the nostrils and all that shit. I mean I'm getting it -
    ANNIE
    So am I. Nuke, honey, we need to talk -
    Nuke gets very aggressive and playful , pinning her .
    NUKE
    Aw hell, let's have a quickie right here -
    ANNIE
    - but you're father's in there!
    NUKE
    Crash says I got ta quit worrying about him - c'mon, honey, we got a lotta catching up to do -
    He pins her to the wall , she squirms away .
    ANNIE
    Nuke - we do need to talk!
    BACK IN THE KITCHEN Nuke 's father is studying pictures on Annie 's wall . CLOSE ON A HELMUT NEWTON PHOTO - A nude woman , two afghans , and a toilet . CLOSE ON A PHOTO OF SWAMI PRABHAVANANDA YOGANDA CLOSE ON A POSTER OF A MARIJUANA LEAF with the inscription `` Better Living Through Mexican Agriculture '' . Nuke 's father is a bit unsettled by all this , when : The phone rings . ANNIE SWEEPS BACK into the kitchen - saved by the bell - to answer the phone . Nuke trails .
    ANNIE
    ( on phone . )
    Hello? Skip? Yeah, as a matter of fact, he is here.
    She hands the phone to Nuke .
    ANNIE
    It's Skip, for you.
    NUKE
    ( ON PHONE . )
    Yeah, Skip, it's me.
    ( several beats . )
    Jeez. Jeez. God. Jeez.
    Nuke hangs up the phone . Looks at Annie and his father .
    NUKE
    I'm going to the Show.
    ( beat . )
    They're sending me up to finish out the season with the Big Club. I'm going to the Show!
    NUKE 'S FATHER LEAPS TO HIS FEET and embraces his son .
    NUKE'S FATHER
    Let's have a quick word of prayer, right here, to thank the Lord for all this -
    ANNIE
    Oh let's not.
    NUKE
    I got ta leave first thing in the morning.
    ANNIE
    That's great!
    NUKE
    How can I possibly thank you?
    He embraces her rather formally .
    ANNIE
    Just pitch well and do good.
    Nuke hustles his father out of the house .
    NUKE
    I will, I will - C'mon, Dad, I'll dump you off. I got ta find Crash.
    As they exit , Nuke 's father turns to Annie :
    NUKE'S FATHER
    God bless you.
    ANNIE
    ( to herself . )
    She will, Mr. LaLoosh, she will.
    ANNIE SITS DOWN in a kitchen chair . An enormous sigh .

EXT.  THE DOWNTOWNER MOTEL -- NIGHT
    Nuke knocks on Crash 's door . Nobody home . Tony is arriving with his GROUPIE GIRLFRIEND to the next room .
    TONY
    Crash ai n't there. He never gets back till four or five -
    NUKE
    Where does he go?
    TONY
    Well, I'd rather not say.
    NUKE
    They called me up to the Show and I wanta tell Crash goodbye.
    TONY COMES OVER AND GIVES NUKE a heartfelt `` five '' .
    TONY
    Goddamn, that's great! Jesus!
    ( beat . )
    Listen, Crash do n't like anybody to know it but -.
    ( beat . )
    Most nights he goes down to, you know, down to Niggertown. To Sandy's. the whorehouse.
    NUKE
    He goes to a whorehouse every night?
    TONY
    Do n't tell him I told you - he'd break my neck.
    CLOSE ON NUKE - Disturbed .

EXT.  THE BLACK SECTION OF DURHAM -- NIGHT
    A CAB MOVES SLOWLY through a poor neighborhood . Stops at : AN OLD HOUSE - Decades of ad hoc add - ons .
    BLACK CABBIE
    That's Sandy's. Keep your extra cash In your shoes.
    NUKE GETS OUT and goes to the door .

EXT.  SANDY'S WHOREHOUSE -- NIGHT
    NUKE KNOCKS AT THE DOOR - A small barred window opens . A face appears - a TOUGH BLACK , SANDY , 50 .
    SANDY
    What ` you want, kid?
    NUKE
    Jim looking for somebody.
    SANDY
    Who ai n't?
    NUKE
    Looking for Crash Davis.
    SANDY
    Ai n't here.
    NUKE
    I'm Nuke LaLoosh. With the Bulls.
    SANDY
    ( studying him . )
    Your breaking ball's getting better but ya need a change up.
    The door opens . Nuke enters .

INT.  SANDY'S WHOREHOUSE -- NIGHT
    NUKE ENTERS TENTATIVELY - Another world . Grim . Sleazy . The Doorman leads him down a hallway full of doors . A BLACK PROSTITUTE enters a room with a HUGE REDNECK . As they go down the hallway , and as they do : We begin hearing singing - raucous , soulful , drunk . NUKE STOPS IN A DOORWAY - Looks into the `` waiting room '' . - P.O.V. SEVERAL HOOKERS in various stages of undress , sit on couches and chairs . Bored , smoking , ancient . The ONE WHITE HOOKER , a skinny 25 year old , accompanies on a guitar , struggling to keep up . And a couple HOOKERS are hanging around a piano that - CRASH IS PLAYING and singing . He does n't look up . Crash Is dressed but barefoot . A cigaret dangles from his mouth as he accompanies himself with decent cocktail lounge chords . Two Hookers at the piano hum along .
    CRASH
    ( SINGING AND PLAYING . )
    But when she does get weary - Try a little tenderness.
    NUKE STEPS INTO THE ROOM - All the Hookers rise in anticipation of a new customer . Crash keeps playing , never looking up .
    CRASH
    ( SINGING CONT 'D . )
    You know she's waiting, just anticipating, the things that she'll never possess.
    ( beat . )
    While she's there waiting - Try a little tenderness.
    Nuke interrupts the instrumental passage :
    NUKE
    Crash. I'm going to the Show.
    Crash Ignores him , keeps playing .
    NUKE
    Club's expanding its roster to finish the season -
    CRASH
    Shut up. I'm playing.
    ( singing last 8 bars . )
    Oh you wo n't regret it, young girls do n't forget it, lost in their own wilderness.
    ( beat . )
    But it's all so easy - Just try a little tenderness.
    As Crash plays on -
    NUKE
    I'm going to the Show.
    CRASH
    Then go.
    NUKE GRABS CRASH by the hair and jerks him to his feet . The two men are face to face .
    NUKE
    I'm trying to thank you.
    CRASH
    Let go of me!
    NUKE LETS HIM GO and Crash staggers drunkenly against the piano , regaining his balance as : SANDY RUSHES IN WITH A GUN to break it up .
    SANDY
    He makin' trouble for you, Mr. Davis?
    CRASH
    No, no, Sandy, put it down.
    ( drunkenly , to Nuke . )
    Nuke, you know Sandy Grimes? Hit.367 at Louisville in 155.
    SANDY
    I hit.371.
    CRASH
    He hit.371 - C'mon, Nuke - you and me, let's step outside and settle this.
    NUKE
    Settle what?
    CRASH
    C' mon!
    NUKE
    I do n't wanta fight you, I wanta thank you. Let's have a drink and forget this -
    CRASH
    God damn it, you fucking virgin prick - step outside.
    Crash drunkenly heads out the back door in his underwear . Nuke reluctantly follows .

EXT.  THE ALLEY BEHIND THE WHOREHOUSE -- NIGHT
    Several of the Hookers follow to watch . Crash is drunk and lost . Nuke in control .
    NUKE
    C'mon, we got nothin' to fight about.
    CRASH
    You fuck!
    NUKE
    Why am I a fuck?
    CRASH
    Why are you a fuck?
    ( beat . )
    'Cause you got talent. I got brains. But you got talent! You're God damn left arm is worth a million dollars a year.
    ( drunken insight . )
    All my limbs put together are worth 7 cents a pound - and that's for science and dog meat.
    NUKE
    You're a great catcher.
    CRASH
    Come over here into the light so I can kick your ass.
    NUKE
    No.
    CRASH
    Okay, I'll kick your ass there.
    Crash takes a step toward Nuke . Pulls up his bare feet quickly , stepping on a sharp stone .
    CRASH
    God damn. I forgot my fucking shoes. Honey, go get my shoes.
    One of the Hookers goes inside for his shoes .
    NUKE
    I'll take you back to the hotel.
    CRASH
    ( drunken , mad . )
    You know what the difference Is between hitting.250 and hitting.300? 1 got it figured out.
    ( beat . )
    Twenty - five hits a year in 500 at bats is 50 points. Okay? There's 6 months in a season, that's about 25 weeks - you get one extra flare a week - just one - a gork, a ground ball with eyes, a dying quail - just one more dying quail a week and you're in Yankee Stadium!

INT.  THE WHOREHOUSE -- CONTINUOUS
    THE HOOKER FINDS CRASH 'S SHOES - Starts to bring them out to him when . she notices cash in one of them . The Hooker takes a few bills for herself , and continues out - BACK IN THE ALLEY - Crash finishes his tirade as : THE HOOKER COMES OUT WITH CRASH 'S SHOES He struggles drunkenly to put them on .
    NUKE
    Forget it. You ai n't worth thanking -
    NUKE STARTS TO WALK AWAY - Crash fires his one free shoe at Nuke hitting him in the back of the head . NUKE WHIRLS - Comes after Crash .
    CRASH
    Come on, Meat.
    CRASH SWINGS WILDLY - Nuke ducks it and level s Crash with a short right hand . CRASH CRASHES INTO SOME GARBAGE CANS - Lies there on his back for several beats . Nuke stares . CLOSE ON CRASH - Blood trickles from his mouth .
    CRASH
    Nuke. tell me something. Did you hit me with your right or your left?
    NUKE
    My right.
    Silence . Crash 's next line is both drunk and sober and we do n't know if he 's just being clever or if , somehow , he 's staged It all . Maybe even he does n't know .
    CRASH
    Good. Good. That's terrific.
    NUKE
    What?
    CRASH
    If ya get in a fight with some asshole, never hit his with your pitching hand. ya might get injured.
    ( smiles . )
    That's another lesson for ya - now quit fucking around and help me up.
    CRASH REACHES UP A HAND FOR HELP - Nuke stares back . AND FINALLY NUKE REACHES DOWN AND HELPS CRASH to his feet .
    NUKE
    Ya look like shit.
    The two men head inside .

EXT.  DURHAM STADIUM -- NEXT MORNING -- EARLY
    NUKE 'S PORSCHE - The Clubhouse Boy drags Nuke 's out to the car and loads the trunk . Annie , Larry and a COUPLE KIDS AND DOGS are watching .

INT.  THE LOCKER ROOM -- CONTINUOUS -- DAY
    NUKE CLEANS OUT HIS LOCKER - Filling his travel bag . Crash sits on a stool next to him . Sober .
    CRASH
    Sorry about last night.
    NUKE
    Forget it.
    CRASH
    I have been known, on occasion, to howl at the moon. D'you understand that?
    NUKE
    No.
    CRASH
    You will.
    ( beat . )
    Look, Nuke - these Big League hitters are gon na light you up like a pin ball machine for awhile - do n't worry about it. Be cocky and arrogant even when you're getting beat. That's the secret.
    ( beat . )
    You got ta play this game with fear and arrogance.
    NUKE
    Fear and ignorance.
    CRASH
    ( raging . )
    No. Fear and arrogance, you, hayseed, not ignorance!
    NUKE
    ( smiles calmly . )
    I know. I just like to see you get all worked up.
    Crash calms down . Sighs . Nuke nods and picks up his bags .
    NUKE
    ( knows it 's not true . )
    Well, I got Annie all warmed up for ya.
    ( knows it is true . )
    She's just waiting for you to show up, y' know.
    CRASH
    I do n't need a crazy woman in my life.
    NUKE
    Maybe you do.
    ( quick beat . )
    Y' know I'm starting to like this game - baseball's a helluva good way to make a living.
    Crash speaks with quiet passion , from his soul .
    CRASH
    It's the best, Nuke. the absolute fucking best.
    NUKE
    Yeah, thanks for everything.
    They shake hands , and Nuke heads out the door .
    CRASH
    Nuke -.
    ( Nuke stops . )
    Good luck.
    NUKE
    You too. Meat.
    Nuke smiles . A little arrogance and fear .

EXT.  DURHAM STADIUM -- CONTINUOUS DAY
    NUKE TOSSES HIS BAG in the Porsche and motions to Annie . They step away from the others .
    ANNIE
    Well I guess this is it.
    NUKE
    ( smiles . )
    I wo n't be needing these anymore.
    NUKE PULLS ANNIE 'S RED PANTIES from his jacket pocket . The frilly , silk lace is tattered . The panties have been through the mill . She accepts them graciously .
    ANNIE
    Neither will I.
    NUKE
    I think I'm ready for the Show.
    ANNIE
    Ebby Calvin Nuke LaLoosh - do n't think too much.
    NUKE
    Do n't worry.
    They look at each other awkwardly , sweetly , and : NUKE KISSES ANNIE GENTLY ON THE LIPS - They hesitate , and Nuke heads for his Porsche . CRASH ARRIVES IN THE DOORWAY to watch . Nuke bids farewell to his father and climbs into his car .
    NUKE
    I got ta go now, Dad.
    FATHER
    I was thinking I could fly up and spend a week in the Big Leagues with you - help you get comfortable.
    NUKE
    No. If I screw up, I wanta do it alone. I'll call.
    FATHER
    We'll be praying for you.
    NUKE
    Dad - if my curveball is hanging, God ai n't gon na help me.
    FATHER
    We'll pray anyway.
    NUKE
    ( kindly . )
    If it makes you and mom feel better, go for it. I got ta run -
    THEY SHAKE HANDS , AND : CRASH 'S P.O.V. - NUKE ROARS AWAY in his Porsche , leaving a trail of dust in the Stadium parking lot .

EXT.  DURHAM STADIUM -- DUSK
    MILLIE AND JIMMY 'S WEDDING - A formal wedding on the pitcher 's mound . Millie in white . Jimmy in his uniform . Skip is the best man , also in uniform , and several players and groupies are the attendants , Annie as the Bride 's Maid . Organ music plays the wedding march . JIMMY LIFTS MILLIE 'S VEIL and kisses her . The stands are full of fans . JIMMY LEADS MILLIE DOWN THE `` AISLE '' towards home plate .

EXT.  DURHAM STADIUM -- GAME IN PROGRESS -- NIGHT
    CLOSE ON SCOREBOARD - Ninth inning . Durham is leading by a score of 1 to 0 . Two outs . JIMMY IS PITCHING - He delivers . The batter rockets a line drive up the alley . A PENINSULA RUNNER races from first , rounding third , trying to score . A relay . CRASH WAITS AT THE PLATE - Here comes the runner . Here comes the throw . A close play . A terrible collision . Crash goes rolling . The umpire waits - and in a cloud of dust , Crash holds up the ball . THE CROWD ROARS - Jimmy jumps victoriously in the air .

INT.  THE LOCKER ROOM -- NIGHT
    The air of victory . The mood is up and goofy . Beer cans are squirted at Jimmy , the groom .
    JIMMY
    I wanta thank everybody and the Lord for the victory, it's a wonderful way to celebrate my marriage - and I guess we're all back on a winning streak, eh? l A few raucous `` Fuckin A's'' from the team.
    TONY
    Hey, Jimmy - we chipped in and kind got a little gift for ya of a special wedding cake from the Durham Bulls.
    DEKE CARRIES OUT AN WEDDING CAKE - It 's X - Rated . The decorative Bride and Groom are fucking . Jimmy 's embarrassed but it 's all good natured . CRASH COMING OUT OF THE SHOWER - Toweling off , watching the innocent , vulgar fun . He sits down in front of his locker , drying his hair , when the CLUBHOUSE BOY approaches :
    CLUBHOUSE BOY
    Hey, Crash - Skip wants to see ya.
    CRASH RISES AND HEADS FOR SKIP 'S CUBICLE - Wearing only a towel and his shower shoes . INSIDE SKIP 'S OFFICE - Skip and Larry sit in postgame routine , checking charts , smoking , half dressed . CRASH ENTERS as he 's still drying off .
    CRASH
    Yeah, Skip, you wanted to see me?
    SKIP
    Crash, shut the door.
    And it hits him . Crash looks at Skip , who looks down at the floor , unwilling to face Crash who then looks at Larry , who also looks away nervously . CRASH SHUTS THE DOOR - The party rages beyond .
    SKIP
    ( heartfelt . )
    This is the toughest job a manager has.
    CLOSE ON CRASH - He 's been in the game too long to be surprised ; nonetheless , he 's surprised . And hurt . His stoicism is professional .
    SKIP
    The organization wants to make a change. now that Nuke's gone they wanta bring up some young catcher.
    LARRY
    Some kid hittin'.300 in Lynchburg. probably a bust.
    SKIP
    I put in a word for you with the organization - told'em I thought you'd make a fine minor league manager someday. Might be an opening at Salem next year -
    EXTREME CLOSE UP ON CRASH - His eyes are moist .
    SKIP
    Helluva year, Crash - you know how it is.
    Silence . Crash stands there nearly nude . He just nods slightly . Without rancor or bitterness , he turns and re - enters the raucous locker room .

EXT.  STREETS OF DURHAM -- NIGHT
    CRASH WALKS THE STREETS ALONE - Crash stops in front of a window and takes his batting stroke , studying the reflection . And he keeps walking into :

EXT/INT.  CHEAP BAR IN DOWNTOWN DURHAM -- NIGHT
    CRASH DRINKING ALONE at the end of a bar .

EXT.  STREETS OF DURHAM -- NIGHT
    CRASH WANDERS ALONG into the residential neighborhoods . HE STARTS ACROSS A QUIET INTERSECTION Stops . Looks at the street signs . He CHANGES DIRECTION , walks on .

EXT.  ANNIE'S HOUSE -- NIGHT
    The windows glow . After midnight . CRASH STARES AT THE HOUSE - Hesitates , then walks up the porch stairs . Knocks at the door . Moments later : ANNIE OPENS THE DOOR - She looks beautiful . Almost as if she was expecting him . At first , silence . Then :
    CRASH
    I got released.
    ANNIE
    I heard already.
    SHE OPENS THE DOOR - Crash enters Annie 's house .

INT.  ANNIE'S HOUSE -- NIGHT
    ANNIE PUTS ON her favorite Piaf record . ANNIE POURS A DRINK for both of them . CRASH PUTS A HAND ON HER HIP - Annie closes her eyes , a tiny gasp . He kisses her forehead . She kisses his neck . A tiny smile from Crash . The same from Annie . SHE KISSES HIM on the corner of his mouth . Her hand finds the back of his head and she runs her fingers through his hair . CRASH RESPONDS - They kiss slowly , deeply . As - HIS HAND ON HER HIP PULLS UP HER SKIRT - By degrees , the skirt is raised up her stocking covered leg . At last exposing the beloved - BLACK GARTER SNAPS - Crash 's hand expertly holds up the skirt and effortlessly UNSNAPS THE GARTER with a minimum of effort . FLICK , FLICK , FLICK - The garter snaps are free .
    ANNIE
    Oh my.
    THE BEDROOM - Crash carries Annie to the bed . ANNIE 'S FOOT KICKS OVER A LAMP onto the floor . ANNIE 'S BLOUSE FRONT - Flick , flick , flick . Crash unbuttons it with one hand in seconds . Even Annie is startled with the speed and ease of Crash 's hand . HER HAND SLIDES UNDER THE WAISTBAND of his underwear HIS HAND SLIDES UP UNDER HER panties . A FULL EMBRACE ON THE EDGE OF THE BED - Remnants of clothes cover parts of their bodies . They tumble out of control to the floor . ANNIE 'S HAND GRABS ONTO A DRESSER LEG - A carved oak antique , her hand holds on tight and shakes the dresser . THE DRESSER TOP SHAKES - Makeup bottles and pictures and dozens of Annie 's special things rattle and fall ANNIE 'S READ RESTS ON CRASH 'S STOMACH - Post coital , they lie on the floor blissfully as Piaf finishes . ANNIE CHANGES THE RECORD to Hank Williams . THE KITCHEN - ANNIE AND CRASH eat an after mid after sex snack . Crash eats a bowl of Wheaties . They each wear one of her robes . DISSOLVE '' Annie sits , munching a carrot and rolling a joint of marijuana she keeps in a Victorian jewel box .
    ANNIE
    so you see in a former lifetime I'm sure that I was Alexandria, the Czarette of Russia? What do you think?
    CRASH
    How come in former lifetimes, everybody was someone famous?
    ( beat . )
    How come nobody ever says they were Joe Schmo?
    ANNIE
    It does n't work like that.
    ( stares at him . )
    God, you're gorgeous. Want to dance?
    THEY KISS AGAIN - And fall gradually onto the table top . ANNIE SITS ON TOP OF CRASH lying on the kitchen table . He stretches out a leg and : KICKS THE BOWL OF CEREAL to the floor . It smashes - ceramics , milk , cereal go everywhere . As : THEY START MAKING LOVE AGAIN in the glaring kitchen light . CRASH AND ANNIE DANCE in her living room . THE BEDROOM - Crash is handcuffed to the bed . He seems perfectly happy as Annie reads Walt Whitman .
    ANNIE
    mouth, tongue, lips, teeth, roof of the mouth, jaws, and the jaw hinges.
    ANNIE HANDCUFFED TO THE BED - Crash reads .
    CRASH
    wrist and wrist joints, hand, palm, knuckles, thumb, fore - finger, finger - joints, finger - nail.
    CRASH AT ANNIE 'S RECORD COLLECTION - He thumbs through it quickly , puts on a new record . The Dominoes sing `` Sixty Minute Man '' . And . THE BATHROOM - Candlelight around the bathtub . All we can make out is two heads , two bodies , sloshing wildly In the dim glow . Water splashes , dowses some candles . CRASH AND ANNIE IN BED READING - Each with a copy of a Thomas Pynchon novel . Crash tosses it aside . And disappears under the sheets , playing with her as she struggles to keep reading . She puts down the book . ANNIE APPLYING EYE MAKEUP TO CRASH - Who does n't resist , seems even amused . He kisses her deeply , slowly . She kisses him back . They fall onto the bed . P.O.V. OUT THE KITCHEN WINDOW - Dawn . A bird chirps . And we hear a record skipping , repeating endlessly . PAN ACROSS THE KITCHEN - Overturned chairs , spilled and broken cereal bowls , liquor bottles . PAN ACROSS THE BEDROOM - A disaster . Clothes scattered across the floor , overturned lamps , the bed lies at a cockeyed angle . Annie and Crash lie face down - asleep , utterly spent . CRASH WAKES UP SLOWLY - ` Reaches up and pulls his underwear off of a lampshade , pulls them on , and gets slowly out of bed . He staggers across the bedroom floor , stumbling a bit , into : THE LIVING ROOM - He stumbles across the trashed room . Record album covers , more liquor bottles , pillows , cushions , pictures hanging crookedly on the wall . CRASH TAKES THE SKIPPING RECORD off the player and breathes a sigh of relief . He sees his pants lying on the floor and pulls them on . CRASH OPENS A DRAWER - Pulls out a piece of paper and a pencil . He starts writing .

INT.  THE BEDROOM -- LATER
    Sun streams in . Annie opens her eyes . Rubs them . Reaches over for Crash . Her hand hits a note . She whirls . He 's gone . Only a note . SHE SITS UP WITH A START and reads the note .
    ANNIE
    ( VOICE OVER . )
    Crash said he had to get an early start to drive to Asheville in the South Atlantic League where he heard they might need a catcher to finish out the season.
    ZOOM IN EXTREME CLOSE UP OF NOTE - `` Love , Crash '' .

EXT.  GREAT SMOKY MOUNTAINS -- DAY
    CRASH IN HIS CAR heading for Asheville .

EXT.  ASHEVILLE BASEBALL PARK -- DAY
    CRASH KNOCKING ON THE BASEBALL OFFICE DOOR - Looking for work .

INT.  ASHEVILLE LOCKER ROOM -- DAY
    CRASH UNLOADING HIS GEAR Into yet another locker .

INT.  ANNIE'S KITCHEN -- DAY
    ANNIE SCRUBBING HER KITCHEN FLOOR - Down on her hands and knees , picking up the broken cereal bowl .
    ANNIE
    ( VOICE OVER CONT 'D . )
    The house smelled like sex for days. It was wonderful. The only real cleaning I did was on the kitchen floor'cause who likes to walk on spilt cereal?
    SHE FINDS A BIT OF A JOINT on the floor as she 's cleaning . She picks it up , sits on the floor under the table , and lights the tiny joint .
    ANNIE
    ( VOICE OVER CONT 'D . )
    The funny thing is, I stopped worrying about Nuke. Somehow I knew nothing would stop him. Crash was right - Nuke had a gift.

EXT.  INSIDE A MAJOR LEAGUE STADIUM (ATLANTA) -- DAY
    NUKE IN STREET CLOTHES IN THE DUGOUT of an empty stadium . 50,000 seats . Slick . Awesome . He 's being interviewed by a BIG LEAGUE REPORTER , who has a small tape deck and has stuck mike in Nuke 's face .
    NUKE
    ( like a big leaguer . )
    Y' know, I'm just happy to be here and hope I can help the ballclub. I just want to give it my best shot and good Lord willing, things'll work out. got ta play'em one day at a time, Y' know.
    THE BIG LEAGUE REPORTER nods attentively as Nuke knowingly delivers the cliches like a veteran .

EXT.  ASHEVILLE STADIUM -- DAY
    In sharpest contrast to the Big League stadium , a rickety old wooden grandstand , carved into the pine covered hillside . CRASH STEPS TO THE PLATE - In a uniform we 've never seen him in , of course . The Asheville Tourists . He picks up some dirt , rubs it on his hands . He 's as intense as ever . Still playing for keeps .
    CRASH
    ( VOICE OVER . )
    ( at the plate . )
    C'mon, Meat, throw me that weak ass shit - c'mon, bring the heat, bring it, bring it.
    CRASH 'S P.O.V. - SLO - MO AS THE PITCHER WINDS AND delivers a fastball right down the pipe .

INT.  ANNIE'S BEDROOM -- AFTERNOON
    ANNIE LIES IN BED READING - She suddenly jerks up .
    ANNIE
    ( VOICE OVER CONT 'D . )
    I was reading in bed when Crash hit his 247th home run. I knew the moment it happened.

EXT.  ASHEVILLE STADIUM -- DAY
    CRASH UNLOADS A MONSTROUS HOME RUN deep into the trees . He stands at home plate watching it . like Reggie or the Babe . And does n't move . For several seconds he indulges himself uncharacteristically - until . THE OPPOSING CATCHER SHOVES HIM toward first .
    CATCHER
    Get your ass in gear.
    CRASH SMILES and takes the home run trot slowly . As he heads toward first , HE RAISES A CLINCHED FIST for a brief moment , a tiny gesture of triumph . And then , routinely , he just circles the bases . A HUNDRED FANS APPLAUD ROUTINELY as he circles the bases .

INT.  ANNIE'S LIVING ROOM -- NIGHT
    SHE LIGHTS A CANDLE for the home run . Above the candles , displayed in the shrine , are her RED PANTIES .
    ANNIE
    ( VOICE OVER CONT 'D . )
    I lit a candle for Crash's dinger. and tried to root the Durham Bulls home to a pennant.

EXT.  DURHAM STADIUM -- DAY
    ANNIE AND JACKSON OPEN AN UMBRELLA in her familiar place in the stadium . Umbrellas go up all around , as : THE RAINS COME - The players huddle - in the dugouts . IN THE DUGOUT Skip and Larry reading copies of `` The Tantric Yoga of Sex '' . And spitting tobacco .
    ANNIE
    ( VOICE OVER CONT 'D . )
    The Kid from Lynchburg was n't good enough to hold Crash's jockstrap if ya ask me, and Nuke's replacement had a fastball that I coulda hit.
    ( beat . )
    We had a three game lead with two weeks to go when the rains came.
    THE GROUND CREW DRAGS TARPS over the mound and the plate .
    ANNIE
    ( VOICE OVER CONT 'D . )
    It rained and rained and I thought of driving down to Asheville to see Crash but then I thought `` No, what you pursue, eludes you''. I had to trust Quantum Physics and the Church of Baseball.
    ( beat . )
    It ai n't always easy being this religious.
    ANNIE AND JACKSON POP OPEN THEIR UMBRELLAS and walk out of the ballpark towards home .

EXT.  DURHAM NEIGHBORHOOD -- DAY
    ANNIE AND JACKSON UNDER UMBRELLAS - He turns down one street , she heads toward home .

EXT.  ANNIE'S HOUSE -- DAY
    AS SHE APPROACHES - She stops . Looks up . Crash 's beat up car in the driveway . P.O.V. CRASH SITTING ON THE PORCH SWING Still raining . CLOSE ON ANNIE - She hesitates , and smiles .
    ANNIE
    Oh my.
    ANNIE SITS DOWN on the porch owing next to Crash .
    ANNIE
    What happened?
    CRASH
    I quit. Hit my dinger and hung'em up.
    A moment of silence over the significance of him quitting .
    ANNIE
    I'm quitting too. Boys, not baseball.
    CRASH
    There might be an opening for a manager at Salem next spring.
    ANNIE
    Salem, Massachusetts? Where all the witches were?
    CRASH
    Yeah. you a witch?
    ANNIE
    Not yet. It takes years of practice.
    He smiles slightly and takes her hand .
    CRASH
    You think I could make it to the Show as a manager?
    ANNIE
    You'd be great, just great.
    ( rattling quickly . )
    'Cause you understand non - linear thinking even though it seems like baseball is a linear game'cause of the lines and the box scores an' all - but the fact is that there's a spacious - `` non - time kind of time'' to it.
    CRASH
    ( interrupting . )
    Annie -
    ANNIE
    What?
    CRASH
    I got a lotta time to hear your theories and I wanta hear every damn one of'em. but right now I'm tired and I do n't wanta think about baseball and I do n't wanta think about Quantum Physics. I do n't wanta think about nothing.
    ( beat . )
    I just wanta be.
    ANNIE
    I can do that, too.
    He rises , takes her hand , and they head inside . And as the rains fall on Durham .

INT.  ANNIE'S HOUSE -- DAY
    THE SHRINE GLOWS - Candles everywhere . Rain pours down on the windows outside . And . ANNIE AND CRASH SIT ON THE COUCH together , in silence .
    ANNIE
    Walt Whitman once said - `` I see great things in baseball. It's our game - the American game.
    ( beat . )
    He said `` it will repair our losses and be a blessing to us''.
    ( beat . )
    You could look it up.
    The music - Dave Frishberg sings `` Van Lingle Mungo '' . THE END

Summary: "Crash" Davis (Costner), a veteran of 12 years in minor league baseball, is sent down to the single-A Durham Bulls for a specific purpose: to educate hotshot rookie pitcher Ebby Calvin LaLoosh  (Robbins, playing a character loosely based on Steve Dalkowski) about becoming a major-league talent, and to control Ebby's haphazard pitching. Crash immediately begins calling Ebby by the degrading nickname of "Meat", and they get off to a rocky start. Thrown into the mix is Annie (Sarandon), a "baseball groupie" and lifelong spiritual seeker who has latched onto the "Church of Baseball" and has, every year, chosen one player on the Bulls to be her lover and student. Annie flirts with both Crash and Ebby and invites them to her house, but Crash walks out, saying he's too much of a veteran to "try out" for anything. Before he leaves, Crash further sparks Annie's interest with a memorable speech listing the things he "believes in", ending with "I believe in long, slow, deep, soft, wet kisses that last three days... Good night". Despite some animosity between them, Annie and Crash work, in their own ways, to shape Ebby into a big-league pitcher. Annie plays mild bondage games, reads poetry to him, and gets him to think in different ways (and gives him the nickname "Nuke"). Crash forces Nuke to learn "not to think" by letting the catcher make the pitching calls (memorably at two points telling the batters what pitch is coming after Nuke rejects his calls), and lectures him about the pressure of facing major league hitters who can hit his "heat" (fastballs). Crash also talks about the pleasure of life in "The Show" (Major League Baseball), which he briefly lived for "the 21 greatest days of my life" and to which he has tried for years to return. Meanwhile, as Nuke matures, the relationship between Annie and Crash grows, until it becomes obvious that the two of them are a more appropriate match, except for the fact that Annie and Nuke are currently a couple. After a rough start, Nuke becomes a dominant pitcher by mid-season. By the end of the movie, Nuke is called up to "The Show". This incites jealous anger in Crash, who is frustrated by Nuke's failure to recognize all the talent he was blessed with. Nuke leaves for the big leagues, Annie ends their relationship, and Crash overcomes his jealousy to leave Nuke with some final words of advice.  The Bulls, now having no use for Nuke's mentor, release Crash. Crash then presents himself at Annie's house and the two consummate their attraction with a weekend-long lovemaking session. Crash then leaves Annie's house to seek a further minor-league position. Crash joins another team, the Asheville Tourists, and breaks the minor-league record for career home runs. We see Nuke one last time, being interviewed by the press as a major leaguer, reciting the clichéd answers that Crash had taught him earlier. Crash then retires as a player and returns to Durham, where Annie tells him she's ready to give up her annual affairs with "boys". Crash tells her that he is thinking about becoming a manager for a minor-league team in Visalia. The film ends with Annie and Crash dancing in Annie's candle-lit living room.