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wikiHow to Cope if Members Are Rude or Upset You on a Forum

Online forums are fast becoming a way to meet people, create discussions and write articles online. And forums are also places you can go if you have a problem and you are looking for advice. There are law forums, general advice forums, computer software forums, and others you can join if you need help with a problem. Or if you just want to write about something interesting. However forums can also be an unhappy experience if someone is rude to you or upsets you on a forum. Here is how to cope on a forum if a member is rude to you or upsets you.

Steps

  1. 1
    Think before you post your problem or topic on the forum. If it is a very personal problem it may be better solved by going to an advice center, or legal advice center if it is a legal problem. Not posting it on a forum.
  2. 2
    Bear in mind that the forum is public, and so everyone will read what you post. So if you do choose to post on a forum, if it is a personal problem you should choose a username that is different from your real name. But you may want to use a username that is different from your real name anyway.
  3. 3
    If a member is rude to you or says something to you that you do not like, do not be rude back to them. This can get you a warning from the moderators and you could also be banned from the forum for this. This may seem unfair, but a lot of admins are not interested in who started the argument. As far as they are concerned, if two people are both fighting and making the forum unpleasant, then one person is as guilty as the other one involved in the argument. So if someone is rude to you, ignore them.
  4. 4
    If a forum member continues to be rude to you or writes an offensive post about you, do not post offensive comments back to them. Just report that person to the admin or moderator. Many forums have a link you can click on, or means of contact for the forum admin that you can report that person to. This is a far better way of dealing with it that to be rude back to the member, even though they were rude to you.
  5. 5
    If the thread you are posting on turns into a flame war, or heated arguments with other members, it is best to leave the discussion and not post on there again. It is no good getting so worked up and upset that you get caught up in the argument, and that you end up posting hateful comments back to the members who are winding you up. And if you do this, you can end up being banned from the forum by the admin or moderators.
  6. 6
    If a forum member or other forum members say something to you or give advice you do not like, or are unsympathetic towards your problem you have posted about. Or you may have just got a nasty response from the members about what you posted on the forum. If this happens to you, DO NOT blow up at them by posting back swear words or hateful comments in order to get your own back at them. This will only make things worse and will also get you banned from the forum. Some forums will ban you permanently for this.
  7. 7
    Sometimes if a topic gets out of hand or cannot be resolved or it turns into a heated argument. A moderator or admin can lock the thread or delete the thread. This can be very upsetting when you have spent time and hours writing your posts. Only to have your thread locked or deleted by a moderator. If this happens to you DO NOT start another thread about the same topic that was locked or deleted. As that could get you a warning from the admin or moderator. And it can also get you banned from the forum. REMEMBER it is their website and they can do what they want. So they can lock your thread or the thread you are posting on. And they can delete the thread and there is nothing you can do about it.
  8. 8
    Think before signing up for the forum. Is that forum right for you? Also think before you post. As everything you post will be public and read by everyone online. Is your post or topic right for the forum? Some forums will not allow some topics on their forum. So read the rules first. And if you are not sure about it, don't post it.
  9. 9
    If you are not happy with the forum, it is better to leave that forum and find another forum that you are happy with.
  10. 10
    If you are banned from the forum DO NOT sign up again on that forum with another user name and email address. This will make the admin more angry and they will ban your IP address. Then you won't be able to view the site at all.
  11. 11
    Do not sign up with another account and username on the same forum you are a member of. Forums forbid multiple accounts and will ban you for this.
  12. 12
    If you get banned from a forum, do not post on the new forum that you were banned. Or you could be banned from that forum as well.

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    Tips

    • Even if you follow the rules you may still be banned from the forum. If you are banned, do not sign up on the same forum again with another username and email address. That will make them more angry and they will ban your IP address. Forums keep records of every members IP address and they will know that it's you.
    • Read the rules before you post. If your topic does not fit the forum, do not post it.
    • If forum members or forum admins are making life really unpleasant for you on the forum, then it is time to think about leaving the forum and finding another forum.
    • Forum moderators or admins have a right to lock your thread or any thread you are posting on. And delete your thread and any thread you are posting on. And you have no control over this as it is THEIR website. And some unfair moderators or admins will lock or delete your threads or any threads you are posting on, in a bid to drive you away from the forum. There is nothing you can do about that either.
    • You may want your thread on the forum to be public for all to read. But the forum admin may make your thread private view, meaning only forum members can read and posts. And your thread cannot be found on the web, as it can only be read by you and other forum members who log into the site. You may think this is unfair, as they are your posts and you may want to share them with the public, and among your friends who use the Internet. BUT REMEMBER you are posting on their forum, which is THEIR WEBSITE, not yours. And the forum admins can choose to make your threads or posts public or private view. Or not allow them at all.
    • Your posts on the forum are public and can be read by everyone online. If you don't want personal information or what you write to be shared with the public, do not post it!
    • Even if you follow these tips you could still encounter bullying, rudeness and unpleasantness from the other forum members. And even from admins or moderators.

    Warnings

    • You may choose to leave the site yourself if life on the forum is becoming unpleasant for you.
    • If a forum member is rude to you NEVER post swear words or be abusive back to them. As this can get you banned from the forum.
    • Even if you follow these tips you may still encounter bullying and rudeness from other forum members.
    • The forum admin or moderators have a right to lock your thread or the thread you are posting on. And there is nothing you can do about this. It is their website.
    • If your thread is locked or deleted by a moderator or the admin, do not start another thread about the same topic. As this could get you a warning or a ban from the forum.
    • Some forums will not allow someone who has been banned from other forums on their forum.
    • If you are unhappy with the way things are done on forums. Maybe forums are not for you. And you would be better off creating your own blog or website. Then you are your own boss.
    • If you are banned from the forum, do not sign up again on the same forum with another username or email address. That will just make them more angry with you and they will ban you IP address.
    • Forums can be strict in their rules and have control over everything you post. They can delete or lock your threads and edit your posts. Make them public or private view or not allow them at all. And they can remove any of your posts or threads without warning.
    • The forum has a right to move your thread from public view to private view. Which means that your thread is not visible to the public on the web, and cannot be found in search engines. And can only be viewed by the other forum members. You have no control over this.
    • Bullying on forums is not confined to just members. An unfair admin or moderator can lock or delete your threads or the threads you are posting on, in a bid to drive you away from the forum. You have no control over this as it is their website.

    Article Info

    Categories: Internet Forums and Message Boards

    In other languages:

    Español: lidiar con miembros de un foro que te faltan el respeto o te molestan, Русский: правильно вести себя с грубыми людьми на форуме

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